Where does the Muslim youth get their ideals about love?

hussain.mahammed

a lonely traveller
As Salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wabrakatuhu, found this article at Al-maghrib...

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Where in the world, are the Muslim youth getting their ideals about love, marriage and family?

In Bahrain, a teenage Muslim princess ran away from her family, her home and country forever, putting her life in jeopardy in order to marry an American marine she hardly knew. She made a decision, that she can never take back, to Iive a life of exile and sin. If asked why, she did this, she would naturally say she did it for "love."

Where in the world, are the Muslim youth getting their ideals about love, marriage and family? Are we turninq to the Qur'an and the Sunnah of in Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam? Unfortunately, we do not.

In the Indian subcontinent, we're turning to Indian films; In America and possibly the rest of the world, we're turning to Hollywood.

Bombay, a famous mainstream Indian film, features a Muslim girl who falls in love and ultimately marries Hindu boy. At the beginning of the film, she is shown in niqab. By the end, she is dressing like a Hindu. After her family refuses to allow their marriage, the girl runs away and does not speak to them for six years. At the end her parents come to her and all are happy.

Hollywood, one of the largest influences in the world, plays a huge role in the formation of concepts about love, marriage, and family. These films portray men and women who are "in love." And yet, often times the individual they "love" will be someone they just saw or spoke to briefly. Suddenly, however they are willing to lose their spouse, their family, their job, their life, and even their Lord. It is, therefore, more correct to say that they make these sacrifices because their desires have become their God. Allah speaks of these people when He says: “Then seest thou such a one as takes as his god his own vain desire? Allah has knowing (him as such), left him astray, and sealed his hearing and his heart (and understanding), and put a cover on his sight. Who, then, will guide him after Allah (has withdrawn guidance)? Will ye not then receive admonition?” [45:23]

But yet these very same people that Allah has described in His book as most astray have become our example and ideal. In 1998, Titanic, grossing more than 1 billion dollars in sales worldwide, became the most popular movie across the globe. The story features a young girl of age 17 who is engaged to be married. After meeting and ultimately falling in love with another man, the young girl cheats on her fiance and disobeys her mother. Both the mother and the fiance are shown as superficial in order to make her disloyalty more acceptable.

The messages of these films are very penetrating. The most powerful message is: if you sacrifice for "love", all will be well in the end. In other words, if you disregard your religion, your farmily, your God, following only your desires, you will be rewarded in the end.

If we look to America, we can see the clear effects of these misshapen concepts. 'Why has divorce reached the unprecedented rate of 40-60%? I believe the answer lies in the misconstrued definition of what true love and marriage actually is. These movies feature the wedding as the end of the movie, and thus marriage is seen as the end of a love story, rather than the beginning.

What effect does this have on our society, on our youth in particular? Who are the victims of these misconstrued ideals? What is the basis of the "love" portrayed in these movies? What criterion will young Muslims affected by these images use when choosing a spouse? Will they follow the Sunnah of the Prophet, sallallalhu alayhi wa sallam, who says the one who marries for deen is blessed? Or, will they base their choice on an empty, fleeting attraction disguised as "love"? If the youth begin to choose their spouses based on this ephemeral emotion rather than on deen, what effect will that have on the Ummah as a whole? Will not more families be broken due to divorce and strife? Will not more youth be forced to cut ties with their families (assuming they do not agree)? Will not more children be raised far from Islam?

Thus, we should be aware and guard ourselves and our children from this deceptive tool of Satan. Allah describes those people who only follow their desires numerous times throughout the Qur'an. Let us not be among those who Allah describes as most astray and let those not become our ideals. "Who is more astray than one who follows his own lusts, devoid of guidance from Allah? For Allah guides not people given to wrongdoing" [28: 50]

Yasmin Mogahed
Al Jumuah - Vol 13 Issue 8/9

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discussion! what do you all think??
 

American Muslim

Just Another Slave
I blame much of this on the American baby boomers, those children born between 1941 and the early sixties. Their parents went through the Depression and global war. They wanted their chlildren to be sheltered from those problems. They were told that they were unique, special, that all good things would come to them. They were raised on fairy tales that told the girls that someday their prince charming would ride up on his white horse and take her away from all the drudgery of life. That they would live happily ever after as long as their love held out.

Funny thing is, in the old days fairy tales were often ways to tell children not to do certain things or else horrible events would come to pass...

So, you've got a generation of spoiled children in what was suddenly the richest country on earth...

Throw in the advent of birth control which allowed for free sex without the fear of being tied down by children, mix in illegal drugs, and a large helping of Hollywood to export these ideas and voila! This is what we get.
 

hussain.mahammed

a lonely traveller
To love

This is pretty interesting.Muslims generally dont know how to speak about love or ask the right questions about love and what it is.I think too many Muslims are scared or uncomfortable to talk about it, though its something that is intrinsically part of our faith.

TO LOVE
by Tariq RAMADAN

Why, deep down, do we love? What is the source of love, its meaning, its object? Why do we experience the birth of love one day, and its death another? Why, deep inside us, does our love for our parents and our children endure? How do we love? Why, deep down, do we love?

Life teaches us to learn, to suffer injury, to get to our feet again, to mature. Life is revelation; and when our hearts and our intelligence turn toward His revelation, we can grasp something of the meaning, the mystery, and the meaning of this mystery. There are many ways to love: The Most Caring One offers us love through the very essence of our nature, and invites us to continue our search for the love of our fellow creatures, for Creation, for His love.

There are several ways to love: we can love ourselves out of egocentrism or egotism; out of self-obsession to the point of self-importance and arrogance. How natural a love...and how dangerous. To see the world through ourselves alone: to love ourselves as if we alone existed, and, at the core of this mysterious paradox, to love ourselves to the point of oblivion.

To love our mothers, our fathers, our husbands, our wives, our daughters, our sons and, our senses dulled by habit, learn nothing from our love for them except when accident or absence strike. To become indifferent in the face of familiar presences. Isn’t it a curious paradox? To be blinded by too much seeing. To lose meaning because we are overwhelmed, drowned, carried away by the endless repetition of daily life.

To observe our friends, our fellow human beings, our world, and to ask of our heart: why you? Why should you be loved? For your appearance? For your qualities? For your tastes? To love as we feel, because we so “genuinely” feel. The fire at first, the ashes when all is done... destroyed by betrayal, by flaws, by wounds inflicted. Love that blinds; separation in the glare of hindsight. Another paradox: the glowing coals that are the warmth of our loves, and the infinite burn of our suffering.

To learn to love. Such is the message of all spiritual disciplines. We may love to love ourselves, our neighbours, the universe; we may love to move beyond the self, our own and that of our neighbours; our own and that of the universe. In nearness to the Divine we learn that we must seek, initiate ourselves, tear asunder, give new form, break off and renew. To seek out the meaning of our loves; to initiate ourselves into the secrets of hope and not stop when proof of our qualities lies before us; to break down ego and appearance; to give form to the gazing eyes and all they ask for; to make new the light in the heart and in the eyes and, as when we fast, to learn to break the fast the better to begin again. To be two, with ourselves, with God, with you... a gift, a time of testing, a period of hardship, of hoping.

Near to you or without you. Why do we love? Why do we break apart? Why, indeed? On our journey, we must learn that His love like ours, that our encounters like our separations, are acts of initiation: we can love a parent, a being, his beauty, his qualities; we can love what is and, in the end, know only hurt and suffering. Over and above what exists, we can learn to love the horizon that unites us. To move beyond ourselves for His sake, to seek together the pathway that leads to His light... to love the meaning, the road travelled as much as we love the destination, and our fate. It is constant effort, this jihad of love. To lift up our eyes before us and learn to love, and with that love, find freedom. To move beyond ourselves, to free ourselves from the loves that bind and imprison us: those “ended” loves, sometimes idolatrous, sometimes misleading, and so near to our animal nature. An infinite task, one never to be completed; a task filled with sorrow, with hurt and tears. Here, on this earth, lies one truth: he who truly loves must learn to weep. Life. Love, and life.

Why, deep down, do we love? Some like to bind themselves in chains, others to set themselves free. A mystery. The Unique One calls out to us, summons us, tells us: “Go on! Love! Move forward, seek out, and pursue your quest. The love that will come to you is not at all what you are seeking. It is an illusion, a prison. The love you seek, the love that you must learn, opens wide to you the door of freedom: alone, by twos, by thousands, it teaches you to say: “It is Him I love” and, in the depths of your heart, feel yourself loved. And then, at that moment, we must lift up our eyes before us, nurture the freedom we have found, and bestow all the love we possess upon those close to us, to the universe, to humanity. As we move on beyond this life, or as we remain. Love and true Life.

To love, and learn to leave...
 

simpson

Junior Member
Subhanallah. Inna LiLLahi wa inna iLayhii rajuun.Allahumma solli alaa muhammad wa alaa ali muhammad. Laailahailallah muhammadur rasulullah saw.May ALLAH SWT bless guide us all to the right path and shower His blessings.Amin Allahumma Amin.
 

hager

Junior Member
well,

SORRY
I DIDN'T MEAN USE BAD WORDS
I SAID
example
agirl in 14,said this words...
hope u notice...i wrote in my post EXAMPLE
i mean..that amercain life start efffect on teens behaviours...that's all
 
Deep love or cheap lust?

As Salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wabrakatuhu, found this article at Al-maghrib...

The messages of these films are very penetrating. The most powerful message is: if you sacrifice for "love", all will be well in the end. In other words, if you disregard your religion, your farmily, your God, following only your desires, you will be rewarded in the end.

These movies feature the wedding as the end of the movie, and thus marriage is seen as the end of a love story, rather than the beginning.


discussion! what do you all think??


Salaamalikum,

Jazakallah khair for sharing. There are some deep analysis in this article. The misconstrued ideology of "love" by non-Muslims certainly does come from picking Hollywood actors and actresses as their role models. Many Hollywood stars date, marry, and divorce left and right. It's bananas. Movies, TV's, and magazines tend to brainwash people and give them false pictures of love and marriage.

Here is an audio CD about love in Islam some of y'all be interested in purchasing:

http://www.ilmquest.org/pc-377-101-fiqh-of-love-15-cd-set-by-yaser-birjas.aspx
 

najbc

Junior Member
I think they get from the TV,i mean you watch tv for many hours and you get dieas from it and because the tv is the only thing that really talks about love an all.
 

al-fajr

...ism..schism
Staff member
:salam2:

I think they get from the TV,i mean you watch tv for many hours and you get dieas from it and because the tv is the only thing that really talks about love an all.
Possibly yes.

Its really easy to be decieved by the kuffar concept of what love is, especially since teenagers are at school/college and therefore surrounded by it longer than they are actually at home or some other remotely Islamic environment. Islam has better, more sensible and perfect alternatives for whatever kufr has to offer, but its about knowing it and sadly, the teenagers who get confused, some of them, dont know the alternative, more likely, it hasnt been presented to them at all! They need a shield, an Islamic one, and if parents or other muslim mentors are hesitant and don't present the Islamic alternative in this case, then the kuffar have free reign and are often very successful in light of that.
 

TheKnowledgeSeeker

A Believer In Heart
I think its the whole tv industry thing. I mean in every movie/shows there are the fake happy (while the actor/ress in their real life mess up) ending because of love and our youth see that and think it is real thing. But its not. Love is blind and cheap in the TV industry but our youth get their head mix up.
 

ditta

Alhamdu'Lillaah
Staff member
Asalaamu'Alykum,

I am not 100% sure how to comment on this, but currently i am at college and you can tell these sort of teen relationships have no real basis in terms of its like created by other people. For example 4 people, 2 male and 2 female know each other well. All it takes is for some rumours between Male 1 and Female 1 in order for a relationship to be created with Male 2 and Female 2.

I maybe not be making any sense, but its my opinion.

The above may apply more to school but at college what i notice is as mentioned too many negative influences. Especially Bollywood among the muslims which is the sad fact. Instead of talking about the problem i think Insh'Allah from now on i will try and look for the solution.

In college for example i witness a number of things and the best course of action is to advise the individual which Insh'Allah i try and do although guidance is from Allah (S.W.T). But its pressure as well as from others, shaytan's whisperings - like 5 of the males are smoking and 1 isn't, obviously the one left out will also want to feel part of the group by smoking.

It's difficult this one because it this state of thinking can come from several places, media, the view that the parents will probably marry me off to a cousin and maybe pressure from friends.

I am going to try and not generalise but it comes down to no real knowledge of this issue in the Islamic aspect in relation to both parents and the son/daughter. The problem escalates most likely because there is nobody to explain other topic areas regarding this aspect to the teenager and source of such info comes from negative sources. Because if you see the parents had knowledge Insh'Allah i doubt such problems would occur.

Sounds like a report although it was my opinion. Sorry if it made no sense. :shake:

Alhamdulilah

Wasalam
 

Muslimah-S

Seek The Almighty
Walikumasalam warahmatullahi wabarakathuhu.
Um.. there is far too much to say in this topic and too little time.
But I say as litle as possible.
Love for anyone or anything which exceed more than Love for Allah, is just not acceptable.
Love for anyone which is not for the sake of Allah is a sickness in the heart, where it finds no rest peace or comtentment.
And when any worldly love impinges on the purity of one’s love for Allah and His Messenger (peace and blessings be upon him), then we chose lasting love over love that does not last.

 

Aapa

Mirajmom
Salaam,

Our youth are the key to our future. As a more mature member sometimes I am baffled by what I read. First please forgive me but one post used the "c"
word. Please delete that word immediately. It is not to be found on a Muslim website. Please members if you do not fully understand the connotation of a word do not use it.
Now, yes the baby boomers are a spoiled lot. I am a baby boomer. I see how this generation also known as the me generation is selfish. But, there is always room for change.
We have to become independent of the duyna. I can not explain this any other way. I often respond to posts of young sisters and they are the ones we need to assist. Our younger sisters are being sold in college to the ways of the duyna in the name of education. Our brothers are often lost in the US. They often take on the ways of the hip-hoppers. But, we are Muslim.
To a certain extent many immigrants want to adapt to the customs of the new culture. And they do. I am a prime example. However, we have to find a delicate balance and at all times remember we are Muslims.
I believe in our youth. I believe you are the key to making amends for the mistakes of my generation. I believe we have many sound scholars and imams. I believe we have to make the masjids the property of the comman man. I believe we have to take over our masjids and reclaim our community. We can not sit idly by. We have to be in our masjids each and every night. We must turn to Islam and only Islam.
Please forgive the lenght of my response.
 

ditta

Alhamdu'Lillaah
Staff member
Asalaamu'Alykum,

Spot on ^ Its difficult to describe the method i am going to try and use although Insh'Allah i am sure everyone will try to do something. "Think Globally Act Locally" (Insh'Allah nobody starts to dislike this saying but i feel it applies)

Sister Aquarious: beautiful method of summing up as you said an area with a lot to talk about. Mash'Allah

Alhamdulilah

Wasalam
 

Muslimah-S

Seek The Almighty
Salaam,

Our youth are the key to our future. As a more mature member sometimes I am baffled by what I read. First please forgive me but one post used the "c"
word. Please delete that word immediately. It is not to be found on a Muslim website. Please members if you do not fully understand the connotation of a word do not use it.
Now, yes the baby boomers are a spoiled lot. I am a baby boomer. I see how this generation also known as the me generation is selfish. But, there is always room for change.
We have to become independent of the duyna. I can not explain this any other way. I often respond to posts of young sisters and they are the ones we need to assist. Our younger sisters are being sold in college to the ways of the duyna in the name of education. Our brothers are often lost in the US. They often take on the ways of the hip-hoppers. But, we are Muslim.
To a certain extent many immigrants want to adapt to the customs of the new culture. And they do. I am a prime example. However, we have to find a delicate balance and at all times remember we are Muslims.
I believe in our youth. I believe you are the key to making amends for the mistakes of my generation. I believe we have many sound scholars and imams. I believe we have to make the masjids the property of the comman man. I believe we have to take over our masjids and reclaim our community. We can not sit idly by. We have to be in our masjids each and every night. We must turn to Islam and only Islam.
Please forgive the lenght of my response.

Asalamualikum dear sister I totally agree with you. The most dangerous age I think are during the youth. It is at that time very much attention are needed to be given to them. As teenage age is said to be the worst, but why?. I don't blame the parents but they are an important role in one life.
Parents need to be aware of what thier childrens do in and out of school. They should be real close to them just like friends, who the children can bond with easily.


Ahmad ibn Harb (rahimahullâh) said, “There is nothing more beneficial to a Muslim’s heart than to mix with the righteous and to watch their actions, while nothing is more harmful to the heart than mixing with the sinners and watching their actions.”


What you said about immigrants trying to adapt to the environment is very true.
This explain it very well. Allah hu Akbar.


Mâlik ibn Dînâr (rahimahullâh) said,“Whoever proposed to the world, then the world would not be satisfied until he gave up his Deen as dowry.”

Asalaamu'Alykum,

Spot on ^ Its difficult to describe the method i am going to try and use although Insh'Allah i am sure everyone will try to do something. "Think Globally Act Locally" (Insh'Allah nobody starts to dislike this saying but i feel it applies)

Sister Aquarious: beautiful method of summing up as you said an area with a lot to talk about. Mash'Allah

Alhamdulilah

Wasalam

Jazzakallahu Khair Ahkee. You are right we first should act locally before globally, starting with ourself first. Before we seek the quality of a person we should seek the Quality of ourself. Inshallah.

A Hadiths which should be our thinking. Inshallah Very good, :ma:


Al-Tirmidhi Hadith
Hadith 45
Narrated by Abu Umamah
A person asked Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him): What is faith? He said: When a good deed becomes a source of pleasure for you and an evil deed becomes a source of disgust for you, then you are a believer.

He again said Allah's Messenger: What is a sin? Whereupon he said: When something pricks your conscience, give it up.
 

hussain.mahammed

a lonely traveller
As salamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wabrakatuhu

" TAKE BENEFIT OF THE YOUTH BEFORE OLD AGE "​

Unfortunately many of us forget that. Living in a Jahilliyah society is always difficult but that does not mean we expose ourselves to the fitnahs. We require to strengthen our shields, make it more iron solid, so that the evil ideas and work of the shaitan is hard to pass through.

The Muslim Youth needs support from fellow Muslims, does not matter young or old, black or white, rich or poor. We need to do away with all the types of differences. Above all make duas for them. I know some Muslim brothers who find it rather interesting to talk to girls in private, in public, laugh, gossip etc. For some would be wives of tomorrow are girl friends today. The sisters were hijabs, the brothers put on beards.

Ignorance, idle talk, movies (eastern and western), fun and entertainment are some of the major destabilising factors surrounding the Muslim Youth today.

When the time for prayer comes, some just do not mind it at all. Some just reply that they would pray later. Some continue watching the movies, some are busy finishing the current level on Counter Attack or Hitman. Some are busy with their work and they need to submit it tomorrow. Some are busy indulging in vain talk about the pleasures of this world.

They are from us, among us and some ourselves. The brothers and sisters are ignorant in the knowledge of the Deen. Small steps of deviation lead to giant misguidance.

May Allah Subhanahu wa Taala guide us from the evil whisperings of the shaitan, from the fitnah of this dunya, from the fitnah of Dajjal and from the hell fire. May HE keep us in the path of Righteousness always in this dunya and in the Hereafter. Ameen.

wa/salam
 

sfajmal2004

New Member
Lovesickness

In the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful
By Shaykh Salman al-`Awdah

By no means is love a sickness in and of itself. Indeed, it is the only known cure for many of the problems and ailments that we as human beings suffer from. However, love can turn into an illness if it becomes obsessive, if it goes beyond its proper bounds, or if the object of love is not worthy. When such a situation develops, love indeed becomes a sickness requiring a remedy.
It is Allah’s order in the world that he sends down to it no affliction without sending down with it its cure. Love is no exception.

The treatment of this illness is as follows:

1. As with all diseases, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
This is why we must lower our gazes and resist taking a second glance at a member of the opposite sex who attracts us. Allah says: “Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their chastity. That will make for greater purity for them, and Allah is acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their chastity…” [Sûrah al-Nûr: 30-31]

We can see how Allah first issues the command to believing men, then repeats the command for believing women, thus emphasizing the importance of lowering our gazes. The fact that Allah addresses members of each sex individually shows just how important and relevant this matter is to people of both sexes. Indeed, these verses are one of the few occasions where Allah addresses men and women separately in the Qur’ân.

The look is the beginning that can lead to progressively greater ills. This is why Allah mentions it first, and then follows it up with the command for us to guard our chastity.

A poet long ago observed:
A glance, a smile, a friendly hello,
Some chatting, a date, then off they go!

If some of us find it difficult to carry out this command, they should write these verses down on a sheet of paper and hang them on their wall or place them on the dashboard – whatever it takes to remind them.

2. Thinking about the consequences is often a sobering dose of medicine.
The ability to think about the far-reaching consequences of our actions is one of the distinctive qualities that set humanity apart from other animals. This is why a person just does not go ahead and do everything that tickles his fancy. He first has to think about what is behind it and what will come of it.

For instance, he might pause to think, before embarking upon a certain course of action, that if he does so, he might succumb to AIDS. He might reflect upon how that dreaded disease has already claimed tens of millions of lives, how some of those who were careful – who chose only one sexual partner who even had an AIDS test – nevertheless came down with the disease.

How many people like that do we hear about, some of whom come out and admit that the disease befell them as a punishment from Allah, and hoping that it might at least expiate for their sin?

The same can be said for all the other sexually transmitted diseases. The worst thing of all is to think that an indiscreet man can infect his pious, faithful, and chaste wife with one of these vile diseases.

Another consequence to think about is pregnancy. A man who had repented for his sins once admitted to me that he had intentionally chosen to involve himself with a woman who was sterile. Regardless, Allah wanted her to fall pregnant and she did.

We should not be heedless of the consequences of our actions. Does anyone want to be responsible for someone coming into this world with no idea who his father is; someone who starts out life already disadvantaged?
Maybe one of us will pay the price for his misdeed in this world. Maybe he will get away with it here, going through life unrepentant and unscathed, only to be humiliated for it before the eyes of all on the Day of Judgment.

Some of the evil consequences of this behavior are psychological in nature. A man, once enamored of women, gets to the point that he can never be satisfied. He eternally craves variety and no degree of beauty is enough. Because of this, he may find himself eternally forbidden the lawful pleasure to be found within marriage. His senses and his sentiments have all been dulled.

Some young men travel abroad and spend their time in the company of prostitutes and other women of ill repute, but if one of them were ever to hear that his wife back home so much as looked at another man indiscreetly, he would divorce her on the spot.

One man lamented: “I would forsake all the women of the world for the sake of one woman whom I knew would get worried if I came home at night a little bit late.” This is the sentiment of any man who possesses wisdom.

3. The communion of lawful love is the best cure of all.
All of the stories of love that we find in our literature – whether it be that of Jamîl and Buthaynah, Kuthayyir and `Azzah, Qays and Laylâ, or for that matter their English equivalent Romeo and Juliet – deal with the anguish of unrequited love.

Allah has placed in what is lawful all that we need so we can dispense with what He has made unlawful. It provides the most fulfilling, satisfying, and deepest expression of love.

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “We see for those who are in love nothing better than marriage.” [Sunan Ibn Mâjah (1847) and Mustadrak Hâkim (2724) with a good chain of transmission]

Lawful matrimony is what brings healing to the heart and removes its disquiet. If it is not written for a certain man and women to come together in matrimony, each of them should have faith that there are many others out there with whom Allah can enrich them with a meaningful and loving relationship.

4. Resignation and a willingness to forsake what is wrong.

No matter how painful it may be to part, it is sometimes necessary. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Whoever maintains his chastity, does so with the grace of Allah. Whoever finds self-sufficiency does so with what Allah has enriched him. Whoever is patient draws his fortitude from Allah. And no one has been given a gift better or more bountiful than patience.” [Sahîh al-Bukhârî (1469) and Sahîh Muslim (1053)]

Whoever gives something up for Allah’s sake should know that Allah will give him in its stead something far better.

5. Channeling one’s energies and abilities into what is nobler, more precious, and sublime – the love of Allah

We express this love by bringing benefit to His creatures, by our obedience to Him, by our prayers, our fasts, our remembrance of Him, our supplications, and our humility. We do so by keeping the company of righteous people and by aspiring to the noblest and most beneficial of goals.

We should channel our energies into what benefits us in our worldly lives and in our faith. Allah says: “Seek Allah’s help with patience and perseverance. It is indeed difficult except upon those who are humble.” [Sûrah al-Baqarah: 45]

He says: “Whoever puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is Allah for him.” [Sûrah al-Talâq: 3]

A heart that is full of concern for others will be a heart that is full of love – but not a slave to love. It is an empty heart that falls stricken for any visitor who graces its doorstep.

We should take full advantage of our lives and be as productive as possible. We need to develop our talents, our minds, and put our creativity into practice. Yes! Be enamored – but be enamored of truth and knowledge. Be fully in love – but be in love with righteousness.

From IslamToday.com
 

FreedomFighter

Junior Member
:salam2:

this is a good thread and i wana say thanks for sharing. the posts are also beneficial. may Allah reward you all. this issue of love has actually become a complicated thing. because nowadays you see Muslim youths who have completely forgotten that its wrong to have a girlfriend/boyfriend. it has become so normal, like it always existed. they talk about it like its nothing, they talk about their partners and how they love them, and how its so romantic. a friend asked to me and my group of friends, how come you guys dont have this kind of thing? dont you guys think about it (love) and how you want your mate to be? ya some described how they wanted them to be but for marriage ofcourse. she asked do you guys have b.f? we'r like no, never had one, reply was, why? you guys should get a b.f. answer was we dont believe in these kind of things. realy it has become ridiculous. some have it easy, some get killed for it. like in Afghanistan, its a very bad thing, there is no such thing as boyfriend and girlfriend, but there is lovers and that is a very bad thing. recently this girl who was engaged to another guy ran off with someone she was in love with. the familes of both were looking for them, and when found, they family didnt know what to do, so the father of the boy and the father of the girl decided to kill them both. how sad is that? they said even if the girl lived, no one would marry her, but i dont believe that. see how things are? some people just have it so easy that their families support them, some have to risk all they got. but im thinking they shouldnt have killed them, why didnt they just allow them to get married. but i guess this teaches a lesson to the rest, that this is how its gona be if you get involved in this kind of things. love can be very sad, it can destroy everything. yet its a blessing if used in the right way, for marriage.
 

ahmed_indian

to Allah we belong
jazaak Allah khair for a nice post.

the reasons are many:

the children are not given proper Islamic knowldge.

the environment is not good- mixed schools, offices, market places, etc. and the power of attraction is very high between men and women

then we have programs, songs, movies almost all based on love.

stories of laila-majnu, heer-ranjha is praised a lot.so wht do we expect?
 
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