Marriage in Islam is different from marriages of others. In Islam, marriage is an act of worship and the couple marry for the sake of Allah. The key to success is both parties striving for Jannah and such marriages don't end in divorce. In non Islamic marriages and relationships, the couple had all the time alone, even had illegal sexual intercourse yet their divorce rate is much higher. Almost every married westerner had a physical relationship prior to marriage yet look at how high their divorce rates are. Furthermore, studies show that people changed after marriage and this is also a cause for the high divorce rates. This is not the case in Islam. Please, keep in mind that I am talking about marriage according to Islam and not according to ethnic, or tribal traditions. Allah had provided us with a foundation to work on in a marriage and the goal of both parties is to worship Allah and that includes marriage, children, raising a family according to Islamic standards and all these fall under "worship" as well in Islam. When Allah says worship, He does not mean to sit in a masjid all day and pray but everything we do for His sake and it is in accordance with what He has ordained for believers is worship. This can be a variety of things and not just Salaat, fasting, Zakat and Hajj, but the list goes further.
As far as getting to know someone for marriage, this is allowed in Islam and it is even encouraged to see one another at least once before marriage. One can get to know each other for the purpose of marriage but there are conditions such as no touching, kissing or any other unlawful things, and they can not be alone with one another. If one things about it, what need is there to be alone with someone that one is not married to? We can talk, and get to know one another without having to be alone or in secret if we are Muslims. Muslim means "one who submits totally to Allah" so the marriage is not based on getting physical before marriage nor is marriage just for a business benefit like many people in the west get married just because they want to move out of the parent's house and need someone help with 50% of the bills or other absurd things. Marriage is important in Islam and it is an act of worship.
So marriage for a Muslim and in Islam is different from a marriage for a kafir, Jahily or any non-Muslim. I hope I helped answer your questions and I appologize if I sounded harsh in my answers.
May Allah guide us all and strengthen our Iman, Amin.
