need your advise

[khangul]

:salam2:
my brothers and sisters i have a problem to share it wih
all of you ,
i am living in canada and have three daughters.my older daughter
is 6 years old and she is in grade one .my husband wants me to move
back home after my daughter become 8 years old.but my parents dont want me to come because of security reasons in pakistan.
raising kids in western countries seems a bit difficult for me with all
islamic traditions.i cannt afford to send my kids to islamic schools either.
please brothers and sisters i need your kind advises
:tti_sister:

 

[AlQurtubi]

MashALLAH, your husband is a wise person.

Sister, I would advise you to move back to pakistan. Things arent that bad in pakistan. I dont know where you live in pakistan but pakistan is certainly better than many non islamic countries. Situation about pathans is still not that bad. You can live peacefully.

Moreover, being a mother, the life and future of kids is more important than your life. Are you living in same area where ya ALLAH madad lives?

 

[Karima80]

:salam2: sister,
I have some question for you, Will you move back with your husband too, the whole family united? If your parents do live there, is it then that bad? I would consider all aspects, but I believe from an islamic point it will always be better being raised and living in an islamic country. You dont need to always make sure things are halal for example. I hope you find the best solution for your family.

 

[BinteShafi]

Asslam u Alaikum wr wb sister,

While we are overseas...we hear every day that situation in Pakistan is very bad but believe me it is not that bad...It is a beautiful country to live in. It is certainly very difficult to raise kids in the right way in western countries. However I have also seen very practicing muslims masha Allah who are raised in western society.....they just amaze me and their parents are my inspiration. They are far better than me (who is raised in a Muslim country by a good Muslim family Alhamdolillah).

Influence of society is definately significant in the upbringing of childern but atmosphere at home and parents personalities are far more significant. Unfortunately foreign TV channels, wersternized schools, and internet in Pakistan are playing the role of parents (role model). Boyfriend/girl friend etc are becoming part of normal life. Though it is not true for evey child but it is true for many childern. Music, gossiping and TV dramas are very much part of mothers' lives (regrdless of the fact that they are hijabless died hair, sleevless mother or a hijabi mother). I am not generalizing the situation as I have also seen young people with much better understanding of religion than their parents. The only thing I am trying to point out is that "Role is parents of crucial everywhere" and then it is upto Allah alone so once you put your every effort, next thing is "Dua"

May Allah make your kids coolness of your eyes and the best people of this Ummah.

JazakAllah,

 

[khangul]

:salam2:
brother we live in the same city but there is much distance between
our home .and i am also worry that i would be all alone with my three daughters or may be tomorrow four.but i am also planning to move back for my kids future.
allah knows best.

 

[AlQurtubi]

Sister, then why dont u move to karachi if u have a few relatives there? There are plenty of people like u If I would have a room, I would have offered you

Or if u want to move to your own city, then get a house near ya ALLAH madad's house, if possible. But I am telling you one day or the other, whole pakistan will be under war and there would be no place to run.

 

[Adjazenab]

SISTERS AND BROTHERS, PLEASE MAKE DU'A FOR MY HUSBAND.

It is said that the du'a which is quickly accepted by Allah(SWT) is the one you make for your muslim brother or sister in his or her absence.
Please make du'a for my husband: my husband has passed through the first two steps of recruitment process, now we are waiting for the company to call him for the last step. God in His Majesty knows that I put my
family in His Holy Hands, and He is The One who do not betray.

Salam in each muslim family.:tti_sister:

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

I can only make dua for both sisters. I am but a human being. I know how much I depend on my small Muslim community where I live. My Muslim community is my family. I can not imagine what it would be like to live in a country that is Islamic. I would probably die of happiness. I once wrote a post wishing I could be tied up in a traffic jam surrounded by Muslims.
I will make dua, Insha'Allah for both of you and may the Mercy of Allah subhana talla shine upon you.

 

[BinteShafi]

Sister, then why dont u move to karachi if u have a few relatives there? There are plenty of people like u If I would have a room, I would have offered you

Or if u want to move to your own city, then get a house near ya ALLAH madad's house, if possible. But I am telling you one day or the other, whole pakistan will be under war and there would be no place to run.

I pray to Allah May this not happen. may Allah have mercy on whole Muslim ummah. In my opinion the way to get out of the crisis for pakistani nation is that we all should cllectively do Tauba (Astaghfaar) whole heartedly in front of Allah and should correct ourselves. Then there would be no power other than Allah who would overcome us.

 

[AlQurtubi]

You are right sister BinteShafi but we have become too ignorant and we think that our success lies in following west. The idiot class (elite class) are absolutely way far from islam and hence we dont see any implementation of islam in pakistan apart from books.

We need your prayers for sure. May ALLAH save ummah and make pakistan, what it was taken for. (ameen)

 

[AZAM_SIDDIQUI]

MASHAALAH UR DAUGHTER IS CUTE.MAY ALLAH BLESS HER.
SISTER WHY DONT YOU TRY FOR SAUDI OR SO .THOUGH THINGS R PERHAPS AS OR MORE WESTERN OVER THERE.
THEY SAY SOME AREAS IN ENGLAND ARE REAL GOOD.
LASTLY IT DEPENDS ON THE THINGS YOU SOW INSIDE HER AND THATS WHAT WILL BLOSSOM.
BY THE WAY I AM A YOUNG GUY ON VARIOUS SOCIAL SITES. TRY TO DO DAWAH AND A;LL AND PAKISTANI YOUTH GIRLS AND BOYS ARE POSSIBLY THE WORST HIT BY CULTURAL EROSION,TRUST ME DONT MOVE TO PAKISTAN .ITS FAR WORSE.BCOZ THERE U THINK U R SAFE AND U R OFF GUARD AND U NEVER KNOW.
I M OFTEN ASHAMED BY WHAT IS HAPPENING TO PAKISTANI YOUTH ITS LIKE A HEDONISM . I WOULD RATHER SAY IT WOULD BE BETTER TO GO TO AFGHANISTAN ,BUT SEEMS ITS THE SAME THERE TOO. SO PLEASE HV PATIENCE.STRICTLY OBSERVE THE RULESLIKE NOT MINGLING WITH OPPOSITE SEX WHETHER RELATIVES ,CUSINS OR WHTEVR.AND U WUD INSHALLAH HV A MUSLIMA WHO IS NOT JUST THE PRIDE OF UR FAMILY BUT THE UMMAH AS WELL.
AE NOT ALL U HIJABI SISTERS THE PRIDE OF THE UMMAH.IF ONLY U KNEW HOW HONORABLE U R IN OUR EYES WHEN WE SEE U ACROSS THE STREET AND WE PRAY TO ALLAH FOR BLESSING U ! AAMEEN

 

[ommtalel]

hello sister khangul
i am in a very simliar situation i am maltese and my husband is syrian.
we were going to keep on living in malta but after i turned to islam i decided it was not the best of decisions.
no matter how much you raise your children well they are still going to be affected by their society, in one way or another, and i dont want my children to feel that they are different or missing out on something
so we decided that it is much better that we raise our children in a more muslim country
and what made the decision easier was this;
when i was still in school there was a girl with me, she was muslim, from a muslim family, she was raised well we all thought that she would really succeed as she was one of those straight a's students.
i recently met her after a couple of years, she had a fight with her mother after turning 18, so she just moved out and her parents couldnt stop her because she was of legal age, she quit school is working as a waitress(all that education for nothing), and has been living with her lesbian girlfriend for the past 2 years. when i asked her about her parents, she told me that they constantly tell her to come back homee but she doesnt want to and there is nothing more that her parents can do(may Allah guide her back ontu his path)
i know that this is probably a one off, story and that it could happen anywhere but i took this as a sign that moving to a country where there is less temptation to do such things is better
sister pray that Allah may show you the right way
May Allah Bless us all and guide us onto his path

 

[Jannah03]

from what i hear on the news, the US is bombing parts of pakistan. I know pakistan is an islamic country but they follow their culture more than islam. Is there any place in pakistan where you can find people upon ahlusunnah wal jamaah?

 

[AlQurtubi]

Most of the pakistanis are from ahl-e-sunnah wal jamat. I think you havent read about pakistan very well sister.

 

[khangul]

:salam2:
thank you all my brothers and sisters for their humble replies.
that is soo true that majority of our people blindly follow bidaa
and indo culture but still many of them love to take guidence from
the glorious Quran and ahadeeth.
as for my family, they strictly oppose bidaa but my in laws are
severly expose to all kind of bidaas.whenever i explain something to them that it is wrong, they make fun of me instead they say you people created new things in religion.
the thing is that i spent 7 years out of nine years of my married life, and my parents were supported me all the time.now my parents also doesnt want me to move to pakistan because of security reasons.but i would rether die than if tomorrow my kids commited something unlawful and unislamic.
to all of you
may ALLAH protect us all from evil webs ameen:tti_sister:

 

[khangul]

:salam2: sister,
I have some question for you, Will you move back with your husband too, the whole family united? If your parents do live there, is it then that bad? I would consider all aspects, but I believe from an islamic point it will always be better being raised and living in an islamic country. You dont need to always make sure things are halal for example. I hope you find the best solution for your family.

:salam2:
sister he will visit once a year and i am agree with your opinion
jazakallah khair

 

[khangul]

It is said that the du'a which is quickly accepted by Allah(SWT) is the one you make for your muslim brother or sister in his or her absence.
Please make du'a for my husband: my husband has passed through the first two steps of recruitment process, now we are waiting for the company to call him for the last step. God in His Majesty knows that I put my
family in His Holy Hands, and He is The One who do not betray.

Salam in each muslim family.:tti_sister:

:salam2:
sister inshallah i will pray for your husband

 

[khangul]

Salaam,

I can only make dua for both sisters. I am but a human being. I know how much I depend on my small Muslim community where I live. My Muslim community is my family. I can not imagine what it would be like to live in a country that is Islamic. I would probably die of happiness. I once wrote a post wishing I could be tied up in a traffic jam surrounded by Muslims.
I will make dua, Insha'Allah for both of you and may the Mercy of Allah subhana talla shine upon you.

:salam2:
wow jazakallah sister i love your words
I would probably die of happiness. I once wrote a post wishing I could be tied up in a traffic jam surrounded by Muslims
i love you sister may ALLAH gather us in the best place of jannah ameen:tti_sister: