A Cry from A Chat Victim - good lesson for us all

ummu thany

sister in islam
:salam2:
this is a post I got from a web site. I thought to share with all because from this we can learn a lesson and beware from the evil things. may Allah (swt) protect all of us from the evil path. Ameen :tti_sister:


Assalam Aleikom wa Rahmatullah wa barakatuh
I hope you can be of use to me in this problem: I'm a 17 year old Arab girl living in an Arab country and still in high school.

Unfortunately, I learned about the Internet yet, I misused it and spent my days chatting with guys and watching prohibited websites

(I did such things behind my parents back and no one knew about them) even though I used to be religious and hated girls who chatted with guys.

I then got to know a 21 years old guy-through the "Messenger" living in the same country but of different nationality and we went on chatting till we exchanged true and untainted love "just for the sake of Allah".

He used to educate me about teachings of religion and lead me to righteousness and guidance. He allowed me to see him through a camera, we sometimes prayed together.

Later he started to show me parts of his body which in return caused me to become an addict to the secret habit. Such situation went on for a month in which we learned a lot from each other. We maintained voice chatting and when I trusted him I allowed him to see me, my hair and most of my body parts through the computer camera. My love for him grew more and I thought only of him and nothing else to the extent that I couldn't concentrate in my studies, consequently causing my level of educational pursuit to decline.

He then told me about where he lived and so did I. I called him on his mobile a while after that and checked the validity of the information he gave me. He said he wanted to marry me, I agreed to his proposal for marriage, although I'm supposed to marry my cousin, yet I'm now so afraid of my parents' disapproval especially after he started to threaten me saying: "If you leave me I'll disgrace you and spread your pictures"! Also he said:" I'll cal you using the numbers you dialed to reach me and tell your folks all about you."

When I discussed this matter with him he said that it was just threats yet I feel that he is not threatening me and that he's really going to do something, and now I'm thinking seriously of leaving him and returning to the path of Allah.

My parents are Muslims and religious and if they knew that I'm in love with a guy and actually in contact with him they're gonna kill me( by "kill" I mean beating and humiliating) to avoid the scandal and bad reputation.

I don't know what to do! I'm so scared;

I want guidance;

I want to be happy and safe;

I'm sick of thinking and feeling scared.

Please help me. Because of this problem I quit praying; I quit worshiping in general because I'm bored and desperate with my life; my sisters' reputation and futures-as well as mine- will be destroyed if I don't die, and I want to, today before tomorrow.

I want to leave him but I fear the scandal. He will call back so how can I stop him? Will Allah forgive me if I return to his path? What are the conditions of repentance and how should I repent and?

I fear that I may go back to what I used to do? Where's the way out?

How could I get rid of my addict to the secret habit? And now that I suffer from sexual frigidity, how can I treat it without my parents knowing about it?

I seek your reply so bad; don't throw my mail away.

Please help me as soon as you can; there's no one else to help me; please help me, please.

The sister's message is over; a message that is truly rich with lessons and examples Is anyone out there willing to learn?


www.saaid.net
 

Asja

Pearl of Islaam
:salam2:

Wa hawla wa la kuwata ilabillah:astag::astag::astag:

May Allah protect us all:tti_sister:

:wasalam:
 

Abdul Hasib

Student of Knowledge
:salam2:

Gosh this just makes me sad and upset. :( I'm just SO speechless, and depressed because of all the problems that is facing the Ummah of our Beloved Rasulallah (SAW). :(
 

sister amina

MEMORISING THE QURAN
:salam2:
How I that each and every young girl of our ummah reads this and learns a lesson from what has happened to the poor sister.may allah protect the youngsters of this ummah from fitnah.:astag::astag::astag:
 

muminah92

Junior Member
astagifarallah`

salam alikum sis,

you should not fear the scandals of this dunya for allah will reveal evrything u did in the after life... everybody commits sins and i did my share of them but allah is always willing to forgive his worshippers. there was a man that killed 99 people... 99 people... and then he went to a scholar and asked him if there was any way allah could forgive him... and the scholar said no... so the man killed him... and so the man went to another scholar nd asked him if allah will forgive him if he repents from wat he did
the scholar said yes but he must leave this town which is filled with evil and go to another town... so when he was on the way he died nd the angels of mercy and the angels of death were disputing over wether hes going to go to hell or heaven then Allah said to measure to which land he was closest to... nd then they found out that he was closest to the good land... so he went to heaven... so just go back to allah dear sister
 

sal12

Junior Member
Firstly, repent to Allah and vow that you'll never got back doing what you did. Then continue worshipping Allah and just ask Him for help. I think with this patience is the key. You are young and you have realised yourself that talking with a guy who you didnt really know may lead to a lot of trouble! Don't panic too much, just take this a learning curve. We all make mistakes! But because you can't undo what has happened, the only one that can sort this out is Allah and if you pray to Him, insha'allah that guy won't blackmail you anymore and will hopefully leave you alone. If your parents do find out then continue praying to Allah and asking Him to make things easy for you.

I really hope insha'allah your parents don't find out and that you have truly learnt from your mistakes! I know a few girls who have been in the same situation as yourself and although the parents punish them they go back doing what they did! It's like they can't stop themselves and cannot live without the attention of a guy. Don't let this be you because in the long-term the effects are worse.

Let me know how it goes!
 

Zaynab123

Subhana Allah!
salam alikum sis,

you should not fear the scandals of this dunya for allah will reveal evrything u did in the after life... everybody commits sins and i did my share of them but allah is always willing to forgive his worshippers. there was a man that killed 99 people... 99 people... and then he went to a scholar and asked him if there was any way allah could forgive him... and the scholar said no... so the man killed him... and so the man went to another scholar nd asked him if allah will forgive him if he repents from wat he did
the scholar said yes but he must leave this town which is filled with evil and go to another town... so when he was on the way he died nd the angels of mercy and the angels of death were disputing over wether hes going to go to hell or heaven then Allah said to measure to which land he was closest to... nd then they found out that he was closest to the good land... so he went to heaven... so just go back to allah dear sister

Asalamu alaykum

Sister Ummu thany just posted the message, it's not her. I wish that sister can get your beautiful message.:)

Firstly, repent to Allah and vow that you'll never got back doing what you did. Then continue worshipping Allah and just ask Him for help. I think with this patience is the key. You are young and you have realised yourself that talking with a guy who you didnt really know may lead to a lot of trouble! Don't panic too much, just take this a learning curve. We all make mistakes! But because you can't undo what has happened, the only one that can sort this out is Allah and if you pray to Him, insha'allah that guy won't blackmail you anymore and will hopefully leave you alone. If your parents do find out then continue praying to Allah and asking Him to make things easy for you.

I really hope insha'allah your parents don't find out and that you have truly learnt from your mistakes! I know a few girls who have been in the same situation as yourself and although the parents punish them they go back doing what they did! It's like they can't stop themselves and cannot live without the attention of a guy. Don't let this be you because in the long-term the effects are worse.

Let me know how it goes!

Asalamu alaykum sis

The sister just posted a message that she got from the internet. She can't tell you how it goes unless you think it's her. It would be nice if that sister is able to get your beautiful advices.

She would be strong enough:SMILY346::lol:

wasalam
 

ummu thany

sister in islam
Asalamu alaykum

Sister Ummu thany just posted the message, it's not her. I wish that sister can get your beautiful message.:)



Asalamu alaykum sis

The sister just posted a message that she got from the internet. She can't tell you how it goes unless you think it's her. It would be nice if that sister is able to get your beautiful advices.

She would be strong enough:SMILY346::lol:

wasalam

:salam2:
you are right sis zaynub :). we all pray for that sis insha allah.
wassalam
 

Muslimah16

ServantOfAllah*
Girls need to be so careful with what steps they take in life.
one wrong move and thats it.

May Allah protect the Women of this Ummah. The men too. Aameen.
:tti_sister::tti_sister:
 

IbnAhmad

Junior Member
salaaam

jazakallah sister for sharing :)

this is sooo scary...asthagfirullah...may allah swt help the sister..amiin

wassalam
 

shoaibazizmeer

New Member
Assalam-o-Alaekum dear sister,

Just pray to Allah and ask for HIS forgiveness. You must discuss this matter with one of the elders of your family, probably your mother or an elder sister if you have. This way, if he tries to threat you, someone would be there to understand you and defend you.

As for as that guy is concerned, you don't need to be scared, but be careful. Try to not talk to him and give some break to yourself and analyze the nature of your relationship with him and see what did you gain or loss.

Remember, never give that guy the impression that you are scared of him.

If you want to finish off something, stop discussing it. May Allah Almighty shows all of us the righteous path. Ameen
 

firasath

New Member
suggestion

first and foremost thing u should do is pray to allah and ask for forgiveness , this is what satan wanted that u should stop praying and he has succeded in it, what u did was not rite and may allah forgive u for it , and about that guy is not a good humanbeing at first he taughty u about islam and after that he started do things which are completely against islam whats that ?, u shoould stop seeing him and talking by any means , and if he presurise u to do stuff that he want to see u doing , u should never ever do that and tell him ur not afraid , and if he calls back tell him that u'll inform him in police and he would be getting in trouble , dont hesitate in saying this be firm, u have his number , if he can do something remember that so can u , first try to explain him in the context of islam that its not rite to do such thing what u both did b4 was also not rite and u both should make duwah for forgiveness , and if he doesnt then try the act of telling about him to police , remember that its allah who saved u from further humiliation , just dont worry pray to allah with total dedication and believe that he'll fullfill ur wishes , and our prayers are with u , inshallah u'll come out of this prbm as soon as possible ameen .
 

ahmed_indian

to Allah we belong
so sad..may Allah help her.

i think Taliban were right that they banned internet. i see the evill of internet is more than its good.
 

moortooza

New Member
a cry from a chat victim.....

:salam 2 UMMU THANY.
One of the great thing is that you are aware of the mistake you did .we r all weak and shaitan is always on our way . you are not someone to be hated.we r all sinners. But our rabb is ghafu rur raheem.ask allaah's forgiveness.no doubt ,be assured you will be forgiven. be frank to your parent.they will pardon you. ask them to beseach allaah for his help.don't mind too much of
what will happen here ,moreover think of the world after . may allaah helps you to get fredom from this chain of shaitaan.
May allaah protect us from shaitaan who is our open ennemy.
 

wannabe_muttaqi

A MUSLIM BROTHER
Assalamu Alaikum

:salam2: ,
I'm speechless after reading this. Where is the ummah heading to?. It is a very sad story.

May ALLAH SWT help this girl to repent and to get out of this situation. Ameen.

:wasalam:
 

shichemlydia

Junior Member
serious help...

salam alikoum sister,
i can see how big this trouble is, neverthless, there is still hope for it to be worked out with the help of allah swt. i am going to give you some advices from my friend's experience, and i will write the most important things in capitals.
for the secret habit, may allah swt prevent us from it, my friend had a long bad experience with it, and it works like this, when you watch something exciting your gaze get up and you cannot fall asleep until you get it done. before saying anything, you HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN STOP IT and willing to be a GOOD PERSON. remind yourself THAT ALL THE PEOPLE ARE LIVING NORMALLY WITHOUT DOING THIS? so you can do like them. i am telling you that the first things to get over this trouble is STOP WATCHING THINGS THAT EXCITE YOU. and keep away from anything that has something to do with the other sex. also try to be all the time with good friends who speak only about good deals. avoid being alone. even when you get excited, try to AVOID DOING it, it is hard for the first times, but later, IT WILL BE NORMAL. in general try to keep you gaze as low as possible.

for the sexual frigidity, this is the result of the secret habit, when you do it, you feel like you can live without the other party, because simply you have found the alternative, but when you stop it, you feel the need for the other party, and you become naturaly oriented.
for the problem of this man, i am telling you that you have done smething really stupid by sending him you pictures, you have put the power in his hand. i am a man, and i am telling you that men know that women are weak, so they find ways to get into their hearts, and then when they get the trust of women, they ask for everything knowing for sure that they will not refuse. and like this these troubles happen with pious sisters. try TO DO SOMETHING TO GET ANOTHER POWER IN YOUR HAND ? LIKE THIS YOU WILL BE EQUALLY POWERFULL? , he cannot think about saying something about you, because you have the weapon to strike back, or try to give us his email, personally i will try my best to convince him, that you and him have done so badly and it is time for both of you to repent to allah swt.
at the end, really happy to receive any reply so that i can provide extra help in this matter, may allah keep you away from evil deeds, ameen,
wa salam alikoum
 

IbnAdam77

Travelling towards my grave.
wa'alaikumussalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

JazakiAllahu khair dear sister for sharing this story with us. La Hawlawala Quwwata Illa Billaah!

Is this the situation of Ummah and no one is still caring about it? Sub uhaanallah. For how long are we waiting like this?????

Also I want to add something. This is something happened to another sister and not our TTI sister. She just shared this with us, so that we may gain some thing.

wassalam 'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh
 

LoveofAllah

Junior Member
First off everyone can refrain from saying how sad the story is because it wont help the sister.


Sister ive known someone who went through a similar experience.
The best thing for you to do is to tell your parents. You are young and they will be able to handle the situation better. I know that it sounds scary but you cannot keep this from them.

They may be angry and even possibly beat you but they will do what is best for you.

Secondly, how can you consider marrying a man who is threatening you? If he can threaten you then he is also guilty of the same crime. so he cannot do anything by defaming you because he committed the same action with you.

Trust Allah and do what He says. He is not your mehram so do not talk to him. continue to pray and read quran. Allah will guide you if you turn to Him.

sometimes in life we are not aware of the consequences but when we do face them we learn from them and thats what brings us back to Allah. and that is a blessing because this is a test for you. You can either turn to the path of Allah or turn to the path of the kuffar. In the end if you turn to Allah no matter how he defames you it will be of your benefit because Allah will reward you if you rely on him and perform your obligations as a muslim.
please sister follow my advice and stop talking to him and just tell your parents. After hardship comes ease, it is Allahs promise to us

I will make dua for you.
 

Skywalker

Junior Member
As-salamo'alaikum

I sincerely doubt the credibility of this story. If not all of it but a majority part. If the story is indeed true then I think the boy should be brought to justice. There are laws that prohibits blackmailing. Posting the pictures on net will ruin the life of both of them (in case the guy thinks otherwise). As the case seems the girl is minor so that makes things more difficult for the guy. The punishment for the crime is beyond his comprehension.

Avoid using webcams and sharing pictures with strangers. This is an advice to all my sisters here.

Avoid visiting sites with *!*!*!*!ographic content. Doing that puts your computer to high risk. Sensitive data from your computer can also be stolen.

Avoid filthy chatrooms.


P.S- No offense intended to anyone.
 

IHearIslam

make dua 4 ma finals
:salam2:

Gosh this just makes me sad and upset. :( I'm just SO speechless, and depressed because of all the problems that is facing the Ummah of our Beloved Rasulallah (SAW). :(

:salam2:

SubhanaAllah, wala hawla wala quwata ila biAllah azeem, akhi I feel the same way about the Ummah...may Allah's help and mercy be with us all.Ameen,ameen,ameen

Allah hafiz all of you NOW and ALWAYS:)
 
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