what kind of cloth can women wear in mourning period

hqudrat

Junior Member
:wasalam:

May these questions meet you in the best of Eeman brothers and sisters. My father passed away three weeks ago (May Allah be please with him) and my mother is in mourning period now. i just have a question here, is there any specific cloth she has to wear during this mourning period. what can she do and don't during this mourning period.

JazakAllah khyran.

:wasalam:
 

Hard Rock Moslem

I'm your brother
May Allah bless his soul, forgive all his sins and place him in the jannah ameen.

Sister,

No such thing "mourning period" or "specific cloth during this mourning period"..I never heard about this in Islam honestly.
 

zbhotto

Banned
Absurd to think about these things

There is no such thing called Mourning in ISLAM.

Morning is a way to object ALLAH about what has been destined for him/her and it is a sin.

When the son of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) had passed away,

He (PBUH) did not cry or object to Allah. He (PBUH) was patient and calm.

When He (PBUH) finished the burial of His son Abdullah, His tear begin to shed from His eyes but Still his mouth was silent.

At that period, sun ecclippse had happened and when the people of Madinah begin to tell him that the Sun is mourning because of His son's demise, the prophet (PBUH) replied,

"The sun and the moon obeys Allah and they have no power over themselves."

I dont know how people thinks about dress of mourning.
 

ShyHijabi

Junior Member
Salaam,

Firstly I want to clear something up, it is not forbidden to grieve when someone you love dies. Rasool (peace be upon him) grieved the death of Kdijah (RA) and also wept when his son died. We grieve their absence in this life and the fact that we can no longer speak with them and share companionship anymore. But what is forbidden is to question the timing of their death or to state it is unfair. Allah swt has written our end already and we must accept it with open arms.

To grieve or mourn is not a rejection of Allah's will, rather it is a natural expression of sadness. Now if one says they want to die too or they wallow in the grief endlessly then it is wrong.

However Islam is a religion of ease and does not burden us with needless rituals surrounding death. Once we die then we are buried in simple garments (the white cloths) and have the janazah salat said. As Muslims we should provide support and comfort for the grieving family such as cooking, cleaning and an ear for listening. These are the best ways to assist another through the difficult time of grieving.

Hqudrat, May Allah swt forgive your father's sin and grant him Jennah, insh'Allah. May you and your mother find peace in knowing he died while Muslim, truly a wonderous gift from Allah swt.

Wasalaam
 

zbhotto

Banned
Salaam,

Firstly I want to clear something up, it is not forbidden to grieve when someone you love dies. Rasool (peace be upon him) grieved the death of Kdijah (RA) and also wept when his son died. We grieve their absence in this life and the fact that we can no longer speak with them and share companionship anymore. But what is forbidden is to question the timing of their death or to state it is unfair. Allah swt has written our end already and we must accept it with open arms.
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Reply:
Dear Sister in ISLAM. I agree with you. Salamualikum
 

Hard Rock Moslem

I'm your brother
Agreed, all humans will feel sorrow over the death of loved one.

Let's look at original question again:


:

and my mother is in mourning period now. :

Is there such a thing?

:
i just have a question here, is there any specific cloth she has to wear during this mourning period. what can she do and don't during this mourning period.
JazakAllah khyran.

:wasalam:

Is there such a cloth?

I feel this is pagan's practice.

When a state leader dies, the country will announce mourning period say 7 days, the flag will be lowered. Mourning in some communities that I know sometime up to 40 days and the next of kin wear black attire during this period. Mourning in hinduism as taught my old folks is to be vegetarian for 16 days, can not go to temple for 30 days. The widow, will be asked to wear white attire only throughout her life...but modern hindu no longer practice this.

My good friend's mother (Muslim family) passed away two years ago in the month of Ramadan. I went to his house during Eid, he said the family not celebrating as they are still in mourning period for 40 days. I said what?

I hope we will be more careful with our practice to avoid any resemblance of pagan practice.


Assalamu'alaikum.
 

IslamicGirl24

Junior Member
May Allah bless his soul, forgive all his sins and place him in the jannah ameen.

Sister,

No such thing "mourning period" or "specific cloth during this mourning period"..I never heard about this in Islam honestly.


Respected brother.

Such thing as a "mourning period" does exist in Islaam. When a husband dies or the woman is divorced then she has to observe "iddat" for sometime. She is not allowed to marry during this time or to leave her home. This period is fardh for a wife to observe. (After divorce or after the husband's death)
 

Hard Rock Moslem

I'm your brother
Respected brother.

Such thing as a "mourning period" does exist in Islaam. When a husband dies or the woman is divorced then she has to observe "iddat" for sometime. She is not allowed to marry during this time or to leave her home. This period is fardh for a wife to observe. (After divorce or after the husband's death)

Agreed, I'm aware of this.

But I'm afraid is the sister posted the question was asking about "iddat"? This is because she also asked about what to wear...does not make sense to me. Is there such a thing sister? Forgive me sister, I'm now confuse what was actually she is looking for.
 

IslamicGirl24

Junior Member
Agreed, I'm aware of this.

But I'm afraid is the sister posted the question was asking about "iddat"? This is because she also asked about what to wear...does not make sense to me. Is there such a thing sister? Forgive me sister, I'm now confuse what was actually she is looking for.

Yes she is talking about Iddat because she said that "my mother is in mourning...", not the entire family.

About the clothes? I honestly don't know! Maybe I will find a fatawa and post it here.
 

IslamicGirl24

Junior Member
Hope this helps..


Iddat
by Mufti Ebrahim Desai, Darul Ifta – Madrasah In'aamiyyah, Camperdown; www.ask-imam.com

Things Not Permissible During Iddat

A woman observing the Iddat of death should neither go out of the house nor remarry, nor indulge in beautifying herself through make-up. During Iddat, all these things are Haraam (Forbidden) for her.




Hadith

The Holy Prophet (Sallallahu Alayhi wa sallam) has said that it is not permissible for a believer to mourn for anyone for more than three days, except the widow whose period of mourning (when not pregnant) on the death of her husband is four months and ten days.




Observing a Period of Mourning is Waajib

RULES:

* It is necessary (Waajib) upon every adult and sane Muslim woman to observe Iddat (mourn) the death of her husband. It is not necessary upon a woman who is a disbeliever, insane or did not attain puberty.

* It is Haraam (strictly prohibited) to make an express proposal of marriage to a woman observing the Iddat of Death. It is also Haraam to contract a Nikah with such a woman. Such a nikah will be null and void.

* It is Haraam upon a female observing Iddat to apply perfume; to don ornaments, jewellery or decorations of any sort; to wear eye makeup, such as Kohl (antimony) or galena; to chew or apply colour on the lips, teeth or gums; to apply oil on the head; to comb the hair (in order to beautify herself); to use henna; to wear silken or other gaudy dresses.

* It is permissible to bath and wash the hair during Iddat.



Using Beauty Aids as Medicine

RULES:

* If there is a need to apply oil to the head because of a headache or lice, only such oil may be used that has no scent.

* If there is a need to use Surma (antimony) as a balm for the eyes, it will be permissible. In such a case it should be applied at night and cleared in the morning.

*A female in Iddat will be excused to wear silken clothes due to itchy skin.



Leaving the Home Due to Necessity

* It is compulsory upon the divorcee or widow to complete the Iddat in the same home which was her permanent residence at the time of divorce or her husband's demise. However, if does not have enough money to pay basic needs, shelter and food, she will be excused to leave the house during daytime to work. She should ensure that she adheres to the laws of Hijaab and spends the nights at her house. It is also imperative that, during the day, she returns home immediately upon being free from her work. Spending any time outside the house over and above that which is necessary is not permissible. If her employment takes up some part of the night as well, she will be excused, but she should spend the major part of the night at her own home.

* A woman who owns a cultivated land, farm, property or business which requires her personal attention and management and there is no family member available to assist her, she will be excused to leave the house.
If such a place is equivalent to the distance of Safar (88 kms. or more), then she may travel there with her Mahram (person with whom marriage is permanently unlawful).


* If a woman observing the Iddat of Death is ill and it is not possible to arrange for a house-call by a physician, or if there arises an emergency for her admission to a hospital, it will be permissible to take her to a hospital or another city if there is a need.



Shifting Residence During Iddat Under Compelling Circumstances

RULES:

* woman may move to another home in order to complete the Iddat in the following situations:

* If the house was rented and she does not have the means to pay the rent.

* If her share of the house which she had inherited from her husband is insufficient for her to live in and the other inheritors do not allow her to use their share.

* If she cannot observe Purdah in the home.

* Any such situation in which her life, wealth or chastity are not safe.

* If the house in which she is observing Iddat collapses, or there be the danger that it will.

* If there is a strong apprehension that she is likely to lose her honour, life, property or health if she stays there.

* If she fears living alone and she does not have a trustworthy person to live with her. If the fear is not severe, then it will not be permissible to move out of the house.

* Similarly, if the house in which she is passing her Iddat be haunted and she has a strong fear of demons, so much so that she cannot bear the very thought of living in a haunted house, or there is some open evidence of harm caused by such evil presence.
In a situation where shifting from the house of Iddat is permissible, it is necessary the woman shift to the closest possible house where her life, wealth and chastity are safe. Unless necessary, she should not move to a more distant house. She should pass the remaining days of her Iddat in the house to which she shifted.




A Woman on Journey at the Time of Her Husband's Demise

Different situations have different rulings, the details of which follow:

* If a woman receives the news of her husband's death, whilst she is on Safar and was within 88 km from her hometown, she should immediately return home and complete her Iddat there, irrespective of how far her destination is. This applies whether or not she has a Mahram with her.

* If she had already covered 88km, then

A).If her destination is within 88 km, she may continue her Safar and upon reaching the destination, she should complete her Iddat there, whether or not she has a Mahram with her.

B).If her destination is more than 88 km away and

a).if the place is uninhabited she has the choice of either returning to her hometown or continuing her journey to her destination and complete her Iddat there. It is advisable for her to return to her hometown.

b).if it is an inhabited place where she could stay, she should remain there.

* If in case no. II.B.1, en route to her hometown or her destination, she passes by such an inhabited town where she could stay and her life, wealth and modesty are safe, she should stay there and complete her Iddat.



Negligence of Iddat

Many widows and divorced women do not observe the laws of Iddat. Going out openly, visiting Bazaars and attending social functions are activities undertaken in absolute disregard to this injunction of the Shariah. That is a major sin.




Leaving the House Without a Sharíi Reason

The excuses under which going out of the house during Iddat are permissible have been listed earlier on. If a situation of a different nature arises under which going out of the house appears to be necessary, the situation should be discussed with a trustworthy Aalim in order to ascertain the Shar'ee validity of the excuse.

Many women observing Iddat leave the house on flimsy excuses, such as to show up at a meeting, ceremony, function, etc.




Going Out in Iddat Without Valid Excuse Does Not Annul the Iddat

Some people assume that the Iddat of a widow who comes out of the house without a valid excuse breaks the Iddat and it would be necessary for her to commence her Iddat again. That is incorrect.
 

hqudrat

Junior Member
:salam2:

JazakAllah khyran brothers and sisters for your duaa as well as the explanations given. At the same time i'm very sorry to confuse you all.
well, i think i made a mistake with the word i used as "mourning"
what i actually meant is idaat. Allahamdulellah the family is a good practing muslims and we belief in whatever happen is from Allah.
insha Allah i'll read more about that so that i can answer my mother's questions. JazakAlla khyran once again

:wasalam:
 
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