Same Sin Over and Over Again...

[Serving Him]

As salam alaykum

I know someone who started doing a sin throughout internet and he tried to give it up for 2 years. Everytime he did, he wanted to repent in same day ,but again in end of week he again fall into it and followed his desires. He told his parents that he needed to get married but his parents just do not listen to him. He tried many things. He changed his pc position, he closed pictures on internet and other things...But again he cant stop himself when this intense desire comes. Once he stops then next day he again gives up.

He told his parents that he needed to get married but they dont care much and they just want him to wait some years untill he graduate from his school and get married.

In this case brothers and sisters, what would you suggest him to do ? He tries to be a religiously comitted person inshAllah with guidance of Allah but again and again he falls into this and he really wanna stop it but as i said, when intense desire comes he again falls short and cant show patience for long time...

Your nice advices are welcome

 

[Seeking Allah's Mercy]

Asalamo`Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh,

Advice the brother to:

a) Lower his gaze, it starts with the eyes.

b) To concentrate on his prayers. As Allaah says:

"...Verily, As-salat (the prayer) prevents from Al-Fahsha (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse etc. ) and al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed etc.)..." (29:45)
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c) To fast.

 

[Hassan]

wa alaikum asalaam

and d) Recite "Auzu billahi minash shaytanir rajeem" three times whenever his mind goes to this sin, and to keep reciting it as long as the temptation is there.

Keep him in your Dua, and may Allah swt answer them, inshaAllah

 

[Pylo]

Actually, the thing must come to an end in his mind.
He can control his actions and his movements, no matter how hard the lust and shaitan whispers. It will be very hard to resist in the beginnig but, inshaAllah he shall be victorious.

Man, i quitted to smoke, nothing is impossible when the will is strong

 

[strive-may-i]

Walaikum Ssalaam,

Once he stops then next day he again gives up.

he again falls short and cant show patience for long time...

Patience is surviving a moment longer, and not looking back at how long it was. And that needs exerting the will power.

Actually, the thing must come to an end in his mind.
He can control his actions and his movements, no matter how hard the lust and shaitan whispers. It will be very hard to resist in the beginnig but, inshaAllah he shall be victorious.

Man, i quitted to smoke, nothing is impossible when the will is strong

 

[kashif_nazeer]

Wa 'alaikumassalam warahmatullah,

As the brothers and sisters suggested earlier and along with that seek help in patience and prayer,but that is extremely difficult,except for those who are khashi'un,so try to be of them insha'Allah.The ones who are firmly convinced of meeting their Lord,Allah,as if it's a part of daily routine.So try to achieve that goal .
Be conscious of Allah,that He is watching us 24x7 ,to embedd this consciousness in our hearts as if it's a part of our daily life and thereby having modesty infront of the One who sees everything and will judge.
Be as busy as you can,so that you do not get free time,except at night to sleep and stand up in prayers at night to awaken concsiousness of Allah by invoking Him in the last hours of night through tears and fear ,asking for His mercy,forgiveness and good pleasure.

 

[tic_tac_toe]

As salam alaykum

I know someone who started doing a sin throughout internet and he tried to give it up for 2 years. Everytime he did, he wanted to repent in same day ,but again in end of week he again fall into it and followed his desires. He told his parents that he needed to get married but his parents just do not listen to him. He tried many things. He changed his pc position, he closed pictures on internet and other things...But again he cant stop himself when this intense desire comes. Once he stops then next day he again gives up.

He told his parents that he needed to get married but they dont care much and they just want him to wait some years untill he graduate from his school and get married.

In this case brothers and sisters, what would you suggest him to do ? He tries to be a religiously comitted person inshAllah with guidance of Allah but again and again he falls into this and he really wanna stop it but as i said, when intense desire comes he again falls short and cant show patience for long time...

Your nice advices are welcome

:salam2:

It appears that this sin has become a habit so in order to break a habit you need to do two things. Firstly the trigger and secondly substitute it so the person needs to figure out what causes him to commit this sin and then substitute it with another activity.

 

[Aisya al-Humaira]

Wa`alaykum as-salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,

This problem of being prone to fall into the haraam due to the easy accessibility to the internet nowadays have become a hidden, severe problems not to the non-Muslims only, but Muslims too. Read here: "The Secret Life of Husbands" http://muslimmatters.org/2007/07/31/the-secret-life-of-husbands-sex-the-muslim-ummah-series/

It really is saddening, to be honest. We are living in a world full of fitnah where the choices between good and bad is between a very fine line and it really depends on one's imaan to make the right choices in life.

When you hear the whisperings of the shayateen telling you to do that which is haraam, that is when the struggle begins. If at one point, you (referring to your friend) give in to the whispers, know that your emaan has become weakened and that you have added a black spot within your heart. Clean up the sins and mistakes by doing lots of istighfaar, tawbah *every single time* you sinned, ponder over the meaning of the Qur`an and never neglect or miss Salaah even how dirty or sinful you feel you are.

Yes, the sins seem to become a habit as of now therefore in order to break it, make a huge change on your lifestyle. If you are often on the internet, being alone in a closed room, try to prevent being in such situation. Go offline for many days or even months and work on purifying your heart.

There's one thing that one can strongly feel when you are going against your imaan and following one's bad desires: You can actually feel and hear how your heart and soul is suffering. It's because you know you are doing something wrong.

It's been two years. Some took 10 years. Some even fall into such habit even after getting married, even after practicing fasting but to no avail (Refer above link). This is a test for that person. And he will be judged on how he responded to such tests. Whether he continuously to do so until letting it become something that isn't wrong to commit or he constantly fall back in his prostration, asking Allaah to give him the strengths to fight against his own nafs.

May Allaah heal that friend of yours and make his heart purer, Ameen.

Wa`alaykum as-salaam wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh.