So sad....

shaz_1999

Junior Member
I was lucky to be born a muslim but from what I have read or heard at times families do come round to the way of life and accept you as a muslims.

I would love to help you but im not sure how I can help you

I am really sorry

Salamz
 

Abdul Hasib

Student of Knowledge
Oh I get it sister your a convert! Mashallah :ma: And I think your father is trying to make you feel bad and depressed so that you won't feel good anymore. I feel like I know how you feel sister. People just act like bigots around you and you just want them to get out of your way (your life). It can make you become angry :mad: or so sad :SMILY23:

Like at school the infidels (they don't care about religion, only if something about religion is shown to them, and even if it is, they still don't care unless they could ask questions) make fun of Muslim people. Like in my sister's class this infidel boy says stupid things like Osama bin Laden's your father and stuff but this year she seems to be able to stand up to people. And this stupid eigth grade kid was making fun of this non practicing Muslim boy and started saying stupid things like "your uncles's a terrorist" and I told him to shut up but he might not have heard me but I don't care if he did even though he's almost over 6 feet tall and I'm just over 5 feet because my tall friend at school (he's non Muslim but he thinks that I'm good because he saw a book in my hand that looked like a quran and asked if it was a bible and I sadi no and I showed him what I was reading. And then he asked if I had to read it (because he wanted me to come with him to the other boys in the class because we usually stick with eachother) and then I sadi no (because I was reading a Hadith book (Fadaeel Amal) about Zikr and I said no and then he said that I chose religion as my priority and that I made a good choice. And he sticks up for me when everyone else gives me a problem. And ecspecially since he hates that kid he's going to be able to have the chance to hurt him. Like I remember when a boy put my backpack in the toilet and then the week afterwards my friend started choking him and he had the chance because that boy threw a Dora crayonbox and it hit him in the face.)

But the thing you need to do sister is be patient. I know that you might get angry when people say this to you (I even get angry when everyone says this to me) but remember that Allah is the best of planners. And good and bad is from Allah. If you've read so far I know that you just want me to shut up because it sounds like I'm repeating what everyone else is saying, but Allah will giude you in any way that makes it better for you in the end. If you're old enough; (Being old enough means a lot of things to people, and that means part of it is feeling old enough in yourself or in other words you feel that you're old enough) if you're old enough then you should move out or get married. It really helps. And what I'm saying as in move out is go stay with any Muslim sisters.

:salam2:
 

Abdul Hasib

Student of Knowledge
delete this post someone! I don't know why sometimes I have the option to delete my own posts (when I don't need it) and other times when I need it I can't! oow Mabsoot's gonna get it! :angryblue: NAh just messing. :SMILY149:
 

Aapa

Mirajmom
Salam dearest little sister,

I know the replies on this post will give you courage. This is a beautiful family. Never, never feel down. If you do please post and you will know you have a worldwide family with you.
We can not walk in your shoes. You have embarked on a journey that makes climbing mountains seem easy. Your life will be changed forever. There are rewards too.
Be easy with your family. Your father did not reject you. You stated he just looked and sighed. Give him space and time to adjust to his feelings. Be kind and respectful to him. Actions not words are needed at this moment. He is your father and he gave you the courage to develop your mind. Thank him for giving you the background to be able to think for yourself.
Women in Islam are not oppressed as we wish to live our lives as Muslims. Show your family respect and devotion. Keep firm in your faith. Keeping your family here informed so we can help you through this tranistion. He loves you and he always will.
 

Shannonx

Junior Member
Abdul Hasib,
Well I don't really expect him to accept this right away, but the only thing is since we talked about it, I just haven't brought myself to bring it up again. I really want too, because he told me he hopes it's just a phase i'm going through, and I want to let him know it's not. But I know if I bring it up, he won't listen. Everytime I tried to defend what I was saying he'd just inturrupt me. When I tried showing him that video on Muslim women, he was just saying "Oh cause their here in America if they were in the middle east they would be really oppressed." I'm not worried of him throwing me out of the house, or even hating me for becoming a Muslim, but I know he'll probably argue with me about it all the time. And that will be really fustrating...
What makes me upset more is that he doesn't know anything about Islam, and he thinks he does because he watches Fox News so now he thinks he's some sort of expert.


mirajmom,
Thanks for the kind reply.
No matter what i'll be respectful to my parents, even if they give me the hardest time about it. I'll admit, when I was talking to my dad about it last week i'd raise my voice a little, but it was only in fustration. But, like people have told me to show respect even though I already do, i'll try more so they can see i'm still me, except i'm going down a different path with my life.

I thought too he'd be a little relieved honestly, lol only because he knows he doesn't have to worry about me drinking alcohol, or doing drugs, etc. And he's always worried about my brothers since they do it alot. But yeah, thanks for replying :)
 

Pinky

New Member
no worries

SalamualikumWRWB dont worry sister, InshAllaah have patience and mercy. Alhamdulilah, seriously, thank God that all hes saying is that you're being brainwashed-it could be a lot worse. Alhamduliah he isnt actually DOING something to prevent you from becoming muslim or even dressing appropriately. The best thing you can do is make dua for him InshAllaah nd the rest of your family. Just remember Allaah SWT and all the rewards you'd be getting as you remained patient and steadfast in your religion, especially during the trials you will be enduring with your father or the rest of your family. There is a hadith, sorry I cannot remember the full thing and I don't have much time, but a part of it says something about all the harm we suffer and how they still benefit us, even the harm of the prick of a thorn-Rabbina doesnt use that but to wash away our sins. When you get upset and cry, make dua to Rabbina esp during those times, for the prayers of those who are oppressed are above others. Take care. InshAllaah let us know how it goes, may Rabbina help you and lighten your burdens(thts brings up another thing acvtually, Rabbina does not burden the soul more than it can take, so jus know InshAllaah that you can handle this, InshAllaah) :)
SalamualikumWRWB
 

OnlyOne

Junior Member
Hi Shannonx,

You're situation sounds very disheartning but always remember to keep the words of the Qur'an and Sunnah as sources of inspiration. Remember the Last Day when you'll be standing in front of Allah as a believer, and you will Insha Allah be recieving his mercy. Allah says in the Qur'an:

So, verily, with every difficulty, there is relief Verily, with every difficulty there is relief. Therefore, when thou art free (from thine immediate task), still labour hard, And to thy Lord turn (all) thy attention. (Qur'an 94:5-8)

Hold steadfast to your conviction in Islam. Do your part to spread the message, and Insha Allah, you will be rewarded for your hardship. On the Day of Judgement, not a single good deed, even if it is the size of an atom, will go unnoticed.
 

Halloween Harry

New Member
Your dad has a long & hard road that you will inshalla be leading him down.

That road is the road of struggle for God & it's not meant to be easy.

Just take it easy with him, poor guy probably feels like his daughter is about to throw her life away & he is in the natural protective mode, I think you gotta embrace this, because he does love you. You might also want to show him that you need him with you on this road.
 

saadjega68

New Member
Salam,

hello.
Try to see the pains you are going through as test from allah, continue to pasuade your dad & pray for to open his heart . May see you through this difficult situation.Ameen.
 

faizkh65

New Member
hello, May Allah strengthen you in your imaan and keep u on the right path. I am doing a speech in my class on men and women in islam. I am going to base my speech on the one given by a renowned muslim scholar, Hamza yusuf. Look on you youtube for his speech on men and women. He converted to islam as well. It should help you greatly. If possible ask your dad to listen to it as well.
 

iislam4ever

Servant of Allah 247
Thanks everyone, all the replies are making me feel a lot better. It means a lot :)


Bluegazer, yeah my father is a Catholic. Along with my whole family.
I'm hoping his attitude will change. No matter what, I will become a Muslim I just don't want my dad to give me a hard time about it. I think my mom will be more understanding though, she kept telling my dad to calm down tonight.

:salam2: don’t worry sis,, my dad is a Muslim he talks like that too..i always get in arguments with him to the point that i just give up bc its too hard to convince OLD PEOPLE>>.:SMILY335::SMILY346::angryred:
 

vironchopin

New Member
Salaam sister Shannonx,

I view it this way: I myself a dad having 3 growing up and lovely daughters and am always looking forward the best for them. You name it, everything that I think of is for the best for them. Qur'anic knowledge, education, food, transportation, house, you may just name it.

I would say the same goes to your dad. He would never touch you or hurt you I believe. But somehow he has a misconception about islam, the beauty of islam and how islam has put the level of women. The only think it is true that wives are always expected to submit themselves to husbands, entitle for heritage, equally the same in the sight of Allah and of course standing with the same height with men. Being different in gender which makes male and female different socially. Although both of them might disagree about certain things. After all we all the slaves of Allah. Slaves are always expected to OBEY the master at all time.

By wearing hijab women already treat themselves like a diamond. A diamond should always be kept secret and guarded. Otherwise it will be stolen and people around will develop sense of envy. Every one would eargerly try to at least glimpse at that beautiful expensive diamond. Opposite to man his auraat is at no value at all. If a man were to expose his auraat, it will look very ugly. I bet no one would like to watch man body (But I don't know for those homosexual or body builder, anyway these are small group of people)Hence man is always expected to dress up modestly with the best attire as and like a man. Opposite to women, the more she expose her auraat, the more beatiful she would be and hence, since the auraat of women is a diamond, it has to be guarded. Once the diamond is exposed the consequence is already known.

Be patient, explain to your dad nicely, perhaps asking your dad to debate his misunderstanding with your local imaam. You may have a mosque around your place. You could use this as a pretext to compare. If it not good just abandon it and accept what is good. For us we might not be able to do so as we are very much lacking in knowledge and wisdom. Allah knows best and His knowledge has no borders. He guides whom ever He wants.

Wassalaam
 
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