Do you have a Curfew?

[Aapa]

Salaam,

Forgive me brother,

I see what happens to little girls now. I see the anger in their faces. I see how they pull apart from their mothers. I have also seen the frustations on the faces of the mothers of little boys...what is the dividing line. Where do we stop our children from entering the forbidden zone.
Brother. I know there has to be middle ground somewhere. I know what rebellion can do.
I think discussions like this are important. We need to assist each other. You are absolutely right. The girls do get upset. It seems as if the carpet is pulled from under their feet. The ideal solution is for stronger Muslim communities. That is difficult. But, many of my neighbors who have little girls do not allow them overnight trips; they restrict the friends..because family comes first.
Brother, we need to protect our women.

My comments on Islamic upbringing in NYC/Chiacgo/ DC. There were so few of us. It was dress up and party time. It was a different era. If there is such a phrase as pre-revival..it was so. I can only pass on what I learned. The world preys on women.

I hope this has put into prespective the context from which I am addressing the issues. I am not attempting to judge. I am attempting to shed light into the fact that some restrictions are not bad in retrospect.

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

Sister Jabba, please continue to question as it raises our awarness and makes us stronger. Please know I welcome your concerns. We will, InshaAllah come to terms with what is good.

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,


Two things:
1. Brother GP please explain as you can best why it hurts so much to staddle a fence.
2. One of my favorite loves is on youtube. He is like real.
He is: obaidkarki

ttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4KFvgp6xT8

He states something wonderful, he speaks of handicaps. It is worth the watch.

And finally, I am taking a little break. I need to attend to business on hand. I will be back driving you crazy in a week or so. May Allah protect all my brothers and sisters. May Allah grant you peace and wisdom. I love you guys.

 

[q8penpals]

Assalam aliekum

This is the last I will post on this subject (at least for now!), but due to some reading and searching, I have found the links that I wanted to share (just to get you thinking again).

The conversation here has gone on and on about protecting the Muslim womenfolk, which is all so true with one addition- ALL women should be protected. We need to stop saying "Well the NON-Muslim woman is just flaunting herself and asking for it!" - NO WOMAN deserves to be beaten or abused! As Muslims, we should work to EDUCATE ALL PEOPLE, especially MEN, that just because a woman is walking around naked, that doesn't mean the MEN have the right to go beat her or rape her - that is THEIR crime, not hers. She may be stupid, but men are not wild animals without logical brains (at least most of them aren't! just kidding!).

But here are the links I wanted to share - apparently we also need to protect women from the men they know and are related to. The majority of abuse, assaults, and sexual abuses against women IN THE WORLD (not just the US) are conducted by members of their own family or by their spouse (this is not Muslim specific, of course, but we all are intelligent to know that it is widespread through every part of the globe, regardless of religion, ethnicity, age, color, etc.).

From the United Nations Population Fund: http://www.unfpa.org/swp/2000/english/ch03.html
1. "Around the world, at least one in every three women has been beaten, coerced into sex, or abused in some other way — most often by someone she knows, including by her husband or another male family member; one woman in four has been abused during pregnancy.3"

2. Studies suggest domestic violence is widespread in most societies and is a frequent cause of suicides among women;

3. At least 130 million women have been forced to undergo female genital mutilation or cutting; another 2 million are at risk each year from this degrading and dangerous practice; **Lana's note - this practice is usually carried out by grown females in the family, based on my research**

4. So-called "honour" killings take the lives of thousands of young women every year, mainly in Western Asia, North Africa and parts of South Asia. At least 1,000 women were murdered in Pakistan in 1999.

5. Many cultures condone or at least tolerate a certain amount of violence against women. In parts of South Asia, Western Asia and Africa, for instance, men are seen as having a right to discipline their wives as they see fit. The right of a husband to beat or physically intimidate his wife is a deeply held conviction in many societies.

6. Even women often view a certain amount of physical abuse as justified under certain conditions. For instance, 80 per cent of women surveyed in rural Egypt said that beatings were common and often justified, particularly if the woman refused to have sex with her partner.10

7. Throughout the world, perhaps as many as 5,000 women and girls a year are murdered by members of their own families, many of them for the "dishonour" of having been raped, often as not by a member of their own extended family...."The perpetrators of these crimes are mostly male family members of the murdered women, who go unpunished or receive reduced sentences on the justification of having murdered to defend their misconceived notions of 'family honour,'" Jahangir wrote in her 2000 annual report to the Commission on Human Rights.32

From Amesty INternational - http://web.amnesty.org/actforwomen/scandal-index-eng
1. Violence in the family is endemic all over the world; the overwhelming majority of victims are women and girls.

2. The World Health Organization has reported that up to 70 per cent of female murder victims are killed by their male partners.

From the Family Viloence Prevention Fund - (These are US statistics specifically) http://www.endabuse.org/resources/facts/
1. Pregnant and recently pregnant women are more likely to be victims of homicide than to die of any other cause18 , and evidence exists that a significant proportion of all female homicide victims are killed by their intimate partners.19

2. Three in four women (76 percent) who reported they had been raped and/or physically assaulted since age 18 said that a current or former husband, cohabiting partner, or date committed the assault.31


IT didn't take more than about 10 minutes of research to find all this ( I looked because I remembered hearing some of the statistics about women being far LESS safe in their own homes than out in the public on 20/20 or Dateline NBC, or some such show). On some of the links, they offer statistics that show that "honor killings" happen primarily in Muslim countries (although there is a note that this is NOT an Islamic practice), but other than that, they all show that the religion doesn't matter, the race doesn't matter, and in many places, the age doesn't even matter of the female.

Apparently we have to worry about the women in our lives regardless of whether they are in the house or not. What a sad, sorry state of our world as a whole.

Lana

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

Why the man bashing?

We all know rape is crime of violence and not sex. Rape is not casued by sexual arosual.

women who walk around naked half-naked do so as they are encouraged by the society they live in...

Date-rape is a different element. Different topic. Happens every time.

Yes. we need to protect all women...but this is tti. I like my Muslim brothrs wanting to protect me...and talk about the beauty of Muslim women...and the intelliegence of muslim women....it's ok. this is for muslims to enjoy ourselves and learn....it does not have to be inclusive.

And i do not believe in any statistic that the un puts out. never have and never will.