I am not saying that everyone is bad etc, as there are plenty of good ones, but some younger generation people feel a left out as no one talks about the wrongs society behaviours. Note: A religious Man going to Paradise is not the same as a Male going to Hell. I have too much respect for Man so below I have used the word Man for religious Men and just used the word male for the unreligious ones. Also with Women for religious ones and females for unreligious ones. Society There are many pious, religious people I have met, and am thankful for meeting. Unfortunately there are a lot of “society” people. It is as a disease that only when a person starts thinking about Allah and the Day of Judgement are cured of. People would be prone to dressing, doing something (acceptable in society) as it’s the way to get attention from people, so again they are not remembering that if you spent 20 years showing off to someone, that person and you will only be looking towards Allah on the Day of Judgement. So of course they are wasting their time. Forced marriages We have complaints of people being forced into marriage. A lot of parents do not even think about religious issues, and remember that the Day of Judgement is upon us-but they happily think they are experts on how to live in the world-How can you be experts on how to live in this world if you don’t remember the Day of Judgement?? As the correct choices in life are made my remembering the Day of Judgement. Why do many parents think they need to persuade their children to get married? As marriage is normal for people to do when they get older. As these parents are not only telling their children to get married, but telling them who to get married too-so they are controlling their lives. They are using their children to show off to the rest of society. So if their children do divorce-the parents are embarrassed about society’s reaction. Living through their children’s lives. Even the examples of the Prophets and their wives they accomplished things in their life without oppressing others. I have already mentioned in my other thread “Devils” about evil people thinking they are only successful when other people are jealous of them. Even some people only motivation to stay married is to show off to other people rather then because they love their husband/wife. They have been turning marriage into a marriage of convenience. They are not thinking of questions such as is that person mature to get married, but let them get married into the family as they have already invested so much in getting along with their cousins. Its not an issue of getting married to cousins-but why its their preferred choice as of course there are plenty of decent people out there. Because the parents are thinking about themselves having to get along with strangers, and not people they know, not because their children would have a problem with it. Some parents have been emotionally blackmailing their children, by saying their child is killing them out of grief because they won’t get married. This is pathetic as they dismiss how their children feel, but want other people to think about their emotions, they are being selfish. Its embarrassing to say that if your child does not get married then you are upset-as its their life, relationship-and you are also telling them who to have sex with. Even a woman was beaten up by her Mother and forced to get married against her will, and now she is still married, and has three children, but the end does not justify the means-this is not wiped off her record, it is a sin to beat and force someone to get married, and it stays on their record on the Day of Judgement. 1. You should not allow other people to tell you to get married-as potentially you will be married to that person for an eternity!! 2. Even people in Paradise are not forced to get married to someone against their will-so why should you?? Children growing up get to choose. Your parents wouldn’t even care if you got married to someone they did not know of in Paradise! So remember Allah and the Day of Judgement. It is not a parents right to force their child to do what they want. They are to be respected, but that does not mean that we stop making choices for ourselves. Allah after all is testing us individually. I am not going to give up my decision making to anyone else-certainly not going to trust anyone with it, as this is my only opportunity to make it to Paradise, and of course the consequences are Hell for eternity! There are females who are saying they were treated badly by their family and now they are going on the press criticising Islam-they are being evil, as Islam does not oppress Women. Also why don’t they just make a documentary showing them confronting their own family??? If they are really speaking the truth and interested in having people stop treating people like rubbish? Why aren’t they talking to their families but going to the rest of the Muslim people who have nothing to do with this behaviour? Parents say they are never happy until their children gets married, and when they are married, they say they are never happy until they have grandchildren, etc, its not ending one after the other, why aren’t they happy about getting married themselves? Of course they don’t remember that this world is a test and not a life, and that their children or any future children are being tested in this world. Even females have been sent to hell, they had got married and had children (this is not going to save them from Hell), but of course were spending the time not treating the husband respectfully and gossiping. Again have a good look closely at people who gossip, and you’ll find that they don’t remember Allah and the Day of Judgement. Society females A society female would only ask these questions when meeting a person, are they marred? Do they have children? Even if a person is well educated, or pious, they never ask anything else-that’s why they also stay uneducated themselves, because as soon as they have received this piece of information (Are they married? Do they have any children?), they are satisfied and they don’t think they don’t need to ask anything else about that person-they know enough about that person! How sad that even females have got married to well religious Men, but have not learnt much from them. Spending their time gossiping about other people., as they learn this by their parents too. When they hear of the parents or other people gossiping and getting jealous, they think in order to be successful, they need other people to be jealous of them-so they use their marriage, having children to show off to other people. That is why even in the west, they kiss and openly show that they are in a relationship. But of course these people should think, that if they were to pick out anyone from the crowd-none of them actually care about you. There are females who have admitted to having affairs purposely knowing that he was married, and these females spend more time thinking about the wife’s reaction (not spending much time looking at the husband’s reaction). As of course the only one who is going to show jealousy (if she does) is the wife, and not the husband, so again getting other people to be jealous of you to be successful. Its now acceptable to walk around naked on beaches etc. Other people can see your wife’s body and so do children, it is not fit for a woman to show a 15 year old boy of her body etc. People have their own circle of who their family and friends are, but the unbelievers behaviour is to invite other people in that circle, to be valued etc. So when people are in a relationship they feel loved, special and valued, and this is what they try and bring out, so they want other people to hear and see their relationship to also feel valued, and special. They want other people to see how their husband is making them feel special, in order to have attention from the public. This is why a female who is being lewd would happily have attention from a wide range of people, and happy to lead Males on, -but she has no attention of wanting to get married to him-it’s the fact that she wants people to want her. Of course getting other males to sexually want to be with you is not the same as being valued and treated as a person, but of course if they thought about this more, they would be decent and treat people with respect. Now you hear of garbage and their only defence is that people are “jealous” Of course they are not normal as being a woman, as Prophet Jesus peace be upon him’s mother did not dress that way. What are these females going to say that I am attractive because this males wants to have sex with me-but not so attractive as a Male does not want to get married to them, provide for them etc? Majority of females got married regardless of how they looked-what are they showing off about?? Are they going to say that there Mother is unattractive too? What is it that they are going to say on the Day of Judgement-say to Allah I was willing to be lewd because I wanted these Males attention-of course they would not be caring about her on that Day. Society males Even males are acting like females, if they had sex they go around telling their friends about it, of course their friend has nothing to do with their private parts, just between him and his wife, so why bother telling your friends what you are doing with your own private parts? Instead of talking about what they achieve with their hands by way of work etc. What do they think their friends are going to do value them more?? They are doing the same as females were by they are more interested in the reaction of the public rather then their own wife/husband. But of course no one respects them more, or actually cares about them. They even go as far as wanting other women to talk to them nicely, and make them treated like if they are valued- ie getting other women to talk to you like if they are married to you, this has become the norm for them-if you go to a hotel etc, you want the females there to make you feel welcome etc. When a Muslim woman would not talk to other males the same way as she does with her husband. We only talk formally to males. There are males who can’t even handle not being liked by the general public, females and act badly-well do they really expect people to genuinely care about you as your family would. Even females have commented on how “they think they are good with females”, going around saying darling, sweetheart, etc-this I know from personal experience is not because the way they were brought up to talk. Even I had one telephone call where the male was taking it in turns to say Darling, sweetheart, love -and of course there wasn’t any need at least 15 times (that was excessive, normally a person would say it once), they can’t treat this as a culture, society thing, as even females are laughing at them. Marriage People nowadays are getting married when they are immature, people are more speaking up for what the male wants, sex, also he talks about a wife helping him to be a better person, and unfortunately there is so much belief on people feeling sorry for you. First of all how can you have a relationship with someone who doesn’t even know themselves (so how can you get to know them)?? That’s why when the person matures, people complain, they are not happy about what they have turned into etc. But marriage is not there to help you to grow up, as then you’ll find that the woman /husband that you are married to, are not the type that you are happy with. Usually a woman does not wait as a virgin to have sex with a immature male, as this is not making her feeling valued, or loved etc, as of course he is not a Man. Even in the past it was asked how do you know if you have a Virgin’s permission to have sex -by her silence, nowadays as of course they are wearing rubbish clothes they are not acting as a Virgin, so if she is on the beach in a bikini-she is already used to showing her nakedness to males, and is not shy. They like to make excuses saying if you are beautiful then you shouldn’t be embarrassed about it-but of course Mary,. Prophet Jesus peace be upon him’s Mother is beautiful and she is not lewd. There are cases were females have been having sex with boys-but I couldn’t. I don’t know what they see in them, can’t they tell the difference between a Man and a boy? Males get out more then females, and suddenly when they squander their time of getting a good education and doing a good job, they expect to get married and their wife to help them-when she may not have an education either etc. Boys think its their turn to get married and have what Men have, and they see these Men’ wives working and living with them, and they expect the same thing. So when they get married, they expect their wives to be obedient etc, but I am not happy about a lot of males assuming they are going to have the rights of a Man. Even in the Quran it says this is for believing Men and Women, and I respect Man, not that unreligious Males who are happy to use Islam to say what their rights are without being a religious Man! They are more then happy to spend their time telling females what to do -as they see it as easier, they say your job is too cook, clean, etc. But look at what happened in Sudan, the males fled when it was their turn to do their job as a Man -to fight, after all the females have been keeping up with their roles! Even females there have criticised the males for running-which they don’t report extensively as it lessens the support they are trying to get. So again , I don’t see what these Males have been doing, they are wiling to stay out with their friends, they could have got ready for war-as they already knew of the threat, why are you asking other people to fight for your women and children?? If you are not willing to fight for them, then you should never have got married, as the women have done more, by giving up their lives for the husband, children etc-something that these Males did not want to do. Even the older generation can see that males today are just vile, in the past a husband would die for his wife, now they are happy to chuck them out, divorce them etc. Males want people to feel sorry for them, easiest way of getting attention, also he wants back what he had squandered so for example when he was a boy, he was praised as being clever etc, and his parents, teachers etc, motivated him to work well in his studies-but he skips school, wanders around and then he grows up and gets married-he expects his wife to motivate him as his teacher, parent, when he was a child! There are plenty of males who use society to side with them over their wife, so if there is a problem in the marriage, they expect people to side with them. This is because if there is a religious Man, and his wife is being horrible then everyone will be on the husband’s side, so the Male is expecting the same level of support. As when they grew up they heard stories of women being forced to stay married, or even being beaten up-not much focus on telling the husband off, so they try and make the wife look bad, and even expect her parents to tell her off-in fear of causing a shame as they can’t show off to society), so the Male sees himself as being needed, valued, and thereby uses people to get his way. There are cases where he wants his wife to be pregnant, so she wouldn’t be asking to leave him, as he see females in this world, begging the Males to come back and provide for them. Females scared of being on their own-so he expects her to behave the same way, by wanting and liking the fact that she wants him and begs him to stay. But wanting mainly the respect, support that only a religious, Man achieves from society, even people would expect Prophet Jesus peace be upon him’s wife to be obedient. They do not understand that a woman can happily live with a religious Man, in the west the Males don’t have the same amount support as they are not teaching people about Islam. So people see their women as being free-this is a fair test by Allah, so when these females go on the Day of Judgement they can’t say they were forced to live with unreligious Males, serving pork , beer etc. That is why Muslim Men have been successful with keeping their wives as they are teaching Islam. Also no Woman complains about Men being good, decent, worshipping Allah as a reason why they don’t like them, in a matter of fact they are complaining about Males who are being uncaring, disrespectful etc. They automatically see it as unacceptable for their males to have obedient good wives, so they treat our Men like their males, but Muslim Men care for their parents, family, teach Islam, provide regularly to charity. So they are getting mixed up with what a good Man is and what isn’t even there was a video by a popular singer (can‘t remember her name)-and how embarrassing she was complaining about this male’s behaviour-its was called I think about a boy (switched it off, it was so dumb), and she was complaining about the Male not treating someone right and then she was dressing up like him etc. Parents make the excuse of people will be better after they get married-I ask them, how many Males have they seen are better after they have got married? Marriage is not a charity, it is a relationship between two responsible, mature people. Marriage is not there to help you to grow up -as you should have done this before. Marriage is not a school,. Marriage is not a sobbing place, were if something bad as happened to you in the past, your husband /wife is going to be constantly reminded of your past -as a person gets married with an anticipation of having good times, not hearing of your sad times, and spend one sided relationship playing the comforter. Hence marriage is for responsible people,, knowing about themselves, their positions in life etc. Religious people of course don’t do the above, as we mature, responsible, get married and only bothered about getting attention from our husband/wife. Why divorce is frowned upon is, its because you can get close to someone, but then walk away to say they don’t mean anything to you is wrong. How can you be an excellent servant of Allah’s if you couldn’t show your loyalty to one person and you had sex with that person? A marriage complements a person’s life, adds to that person’s life. So when you do something you have support from your husband/wife. If there is a religious Man working hard, then people in that area automatically feel he should get married, and wouldn’t it be nice if he had a wife to take care of him, and make him happy-this is perfectly acceptable (note that this is what the unreligious Males want-they want people to feel sorry for them etc, when they have not done anything that merits attention for marriage as they have spend time making a big deal that other people have already done, like taking your younger brother and sisters for an outing shows that you are a good person (believe it or not this has been used to say he is good to get married too, etc). So he is using simple good things, that a lot of people have done to show that he is good enough to get married. The best way of course to look at a person’s character is to see how they treat their parents, their family etc (females are now being taught to do this in the West, as of course they can meet complete strangers, when in the Muslim world, your parents would be able to tell you about the Males, their achievements etc, as that‘s why arranged marriages also work). In the West they leave the families, and you don’t know anything about their past, and they can be criminals. Unlike of course if you went to a Pakistan village even a Man would be able to tell you who is living in there, and their names. Living by other people’s ideal way of life instead of your own. It is of course other people perspectives about other people’s lives that was important to society. So for example if they expect a person to make red sweets, and when he makes blue, people think that person has failed, if they expected the magician to include doing a vanishing act and when he doesn’t he failed, But that person has not failed, its not on that person’s checklist to make red sweets, get married to that person etc. So of course they are calling people a failure as they failed on what they expected that person to do. These people don’t even know anything about you or you husband/wife etc, of course their opinions are nothing. When they are critical of a person being divorced -what is that they are critical of? People who get married, don’t plan to have a divorce. Society people would say you should not have got married to him in the first place, but if you had a child and you wanted to have a divorce, they would say it was better that you did not have a child with him and just got a divorce, and if you had two children, they would say you got married had one child, things were so bad why have another, so it can go on about what they are going to be critical about. They talk about staying with it, even if you are miserable, so again, they should tell people what they will be bothered about on the Day of Judgement, people should never stay in a situation which is bad for them, again this is their only time of making it to Paradise, so if you had a female and she was putting up with a abusive husband -your not helping her religiously by telling her to save herself from Hell. How can people tell religiously weak females to help their husbands, when they are weak themselves? People easily talk about marriage, relationships as its easily understandable, that’s why when females read romance stories, they don’t have to be in that person’s shoes to understand the relationship , whether it be a romance story in the past or future etc. It is more harder for them to think about climbing a mountain etc, or going through a jungle. Homosexuality, the depravity! Many people have said they were confused about homosexuality,. Homosexuality is another example of were evil people are willing to use others to get what they want. There are those that are willing to kill others to be happy and lay a claim to their fortune. There are others happy with a break up of a marriage to get married to their husband. There are those willing to eat pork, they don’t care its disgusting, but they are happy if they enjoy it. There are those that take organs our of people, they don’t care its disgusting. There are those that take other people’s hair and place it on their heads, they don’t care that its disgusting, as long as they are happy with it, even some females were questioned with would you take it from a dead person and they said yes. Homosexuality is also using others to get what they want, however they get it. Who cares if its consensual? They are still not thinking about the welfare of others and what is best for others, for them to get married to the opposite sex. They even quote, kindness, love etc, but they are far from it. If they really wanted to get married to the same gender, why are they playing female and male roles in their relationships? As they are in error. Males 1. There are those that see women as being the receiving end of love, and they find their roles easier in this world. They are treated as the weaker sex and are provided for etc. So there are males who don’t want to have the Male role and be with another Male instead. There are those that find it easier to have sex with another Male, as they don’t have to spend more time as they see it making them happy as they would have to do with a women. So they look to enjoy themselves sexually. They find it easier to be with a Male instead of doing the “hard work” that they see as being with a women. 2. Even people are willing to have sex casually with the opposite sex, just to enjoy themselves. They don’t care who they use, they don’t care to even ask them what the last name would be. 3. Just as some typical evil females they use children to try and make the relationship work so they share something in common, which is what homosexuals are looking to do. They should not be allowed to raise up children. Making excuses of children being orphans is disgusting, would you put an orphan in a pig sty? Who are they to say that this is the way they should be raised. The children will disown them on the Day of Judgement. Even when the countries collapse this will not survive. They will not be able to talk about being a homosexual as they are doing now. Replicating the feeling of achievement Talking about mountains, there are people who climb it to feel they have accomplished something (in Islam we don’t have anything against people climbing, sailing the seas), I would like to point out that I feel sometimes they are trying to copy off achieving something as a hero would do-for example, if a person had to climb something to save someone else’s life then they would feel they have accomplished something,, and there was personal sacrifice involved, and I just see sports people trying to replicate this feeling, which is unsuccessful, its fake, they put themselves in the position of difficulty to get out of it and then say they achieved something, when the hero would be forced to act to help another so placed himself in difficulty and has achieved something. Regardless of the excuses even a male (can’t remember the name was left dying on Mount Everest I think by non-disabled and disabled people-no doubt if they tried to help him down they would have accomplished something, but they don’t think and train (who to safely help yourself and that person) do this, just thinking about themselves. So it was a lost opportunity to do something worthwhile. But no wonder they have to keep on climbing, as a person would only feel the need to save a person’s life once to feel he has accomplished something. Misusing kindness People sometimes misuse kindness, and say that Allah has shown you kindness, and then you should show it to others, but Allah has shown his Mercy to everyone on this planet- I learnt more etc, because I strived in the way of Islam (when they did not), of course I don’t owe them anything accept give my thanks to Allah. Charity is were I give a portion of my earnings away, my whole life is not a charity, as Allah said it was created to worship him. People are underestimating what other people have received from Allah and then quick to use the word sympathy-how can anybody provide sympathy because Allah had given me more then he did to you or the other way around etc. Why are you being sympathetic to that person -because he received less from Allah (again how can you provide sympathy for someone receiving less as there is nothing you can give in comparison?)-how stupid are the talks of society people, everyone has received Allah’s attention. Seek help from Allah. Be kind to people as that is normal way of behaviour, but now because people are making you feel guilty etc. But people are more bothered about gaining attention from others, and that is why there are those when they have done a bad thing they don’t care about repenting as they know they won’t be accepted by society etc as if course they don’t think about having Allah pleased with them-they are only thinking about people being pleased with them. So even if your in prison etc, they want to have a loving attention from someone more quickly then prefer to think about having Allah be pleased with them and save themselves from Hell.