I NEED ADVICE please

[Ghareebah]

:salam2: i pray that all of are in the best of health

this has been bugging me for a long time...and i was wondering if any one has any advice they can give me?.

i have a freind who mashallah is a wonderful person inside and out, however i am quite worried about her these days..this friend mashallah just a year ago decided to wear a more fuller covering (abaya) and hijab...she used to wear just her hijab and trousers before. however she recently decided to go back to wearing her trousers, which i find quite heart breaking..because i heard the angels curse the women who wears the trousers because it resembles the clothing of a man...also i feel she is going through things...which i havent actually talked to her about because i feel she is not ready to be open about it. i just want to know how can i advice her islamicly? because i know on the day of judgement i would be blamed if i didnt advice her. its just i dont know how to adress the issue...if i say anything i dont want her to think i am judging her or attacking her...how can i break it to her in a gentle and kind manner...she trusts me fully..and also my other friend adviced me not to say anything right now..but i feel if i dont adress it now? when..and how do i know if either of us will be living tomorrow??? is it better to make dua for her and the adress her or the other way round?????:shymuslima1:
please let me know your comments

 

[ShaheedU]

wa alaikum assalam,
if she trusts u then she won't be hurt by your comments. you could always show this ayat and it should effect her insha allah.

“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies”

[al-Ahzaab 33:59]
hope it helps.

 

[Kayote]

:salam2:

First of all, Masha'Allah for your good intention.

Secondly, I think trousers are not man's dress. Women's trousers are different to men, the only condition being that they should be loose. I have read what the argument of one scholar who claimed trousers as haram for women and personally I found it weak and was not convinced.

With regards to your comment 'she is going through things', its obvious you want to be careful about the issues with her (as you should be), however, why not give her some time to get her thoughts collected. Also, perhaps start a conversation on an islamic topic with a question like:

Hey Asma, I just read this facinating article on (insert an article on Islam you have recently read), & what do you think about it, dont you think its so strange yet true that (insert what you read here)...

My point being, engage her into Islamic discussion (which shouldnot directly relate to her problem) & Insha'Allah she will realise how precious our Emaan is...

And JazzakAllah Khair for making the effort & being concerned for a fellow muslim sister.

 

[MOHAMMEDFALIQ]

well If she trusts you fully then you guys must be good friends rite , so if you advice her i think she `ll understand that you are not judging her, she`ll think it as a friendly advice.

 

[Dawoodi]

salam

salamu alikum.

its good to be soft when u try to give advice alhamdulillah.

but also i read a hadit of the propheth asaw:

be gentle with the non muslim and hardsh with the muslims.

any ligth on this from some one?

salam w.

 

[Aref]

Salam alaikum Sis.may ALLAH bless u for your kind heart and good frienship the replies from above are more than helpfull anyways i would like to remind u and us to of the first doa of the prophet Musa (aleihi salam) in sura (ta-ha) the meaning wich is like this:"My lord open up my chest,and make my task easy for me,and untie the knot from my tong, so he will comprehend my speech."
Musa (alaihi salam) suplicated like this when ALLAH send him ot talk to pharaon, wich was not an easy task.
i only mean by this to make a reference to the unconfortable situation, and that all our remedies are in the quran, let's use them and get the best results.
just make your intention right sis. ALLAh will take care of the rest.

i leave u with this frase I forgot were I read it from.

"REAL FRIENDS ARE LIKE BLOOD, THEY COME TO THE WOUND WITHOUT BEING CALLED"

 

[Hadi]

Esselamu aleykum we rahmtullahi we baraktuhu
I think your friend was ( at the wrong place with the wrong people ). If i was you i try and explain her some certain things (reminde her) why where we created etc + your prayers wont be excepted if you not covered. Make sure you don't put to much pressure on her because that'll just put her off. Ma selam and good luck.