problem with talking too much

[sky_012]

:salam2:

i've read many times that a good muslim only speaks when it is necessary otherwise he keeps quiet...and we shouldn't talk about un-necessary and un-usefull things...

but on the other side, i've laso read that one should have a healthy relation and good relation with family, parents, brothers and sisters etc etc ...and spend time with them

but the thing you know is i talk toooo much with my mom, like about all what i did the hole day from moring to afternoon, sometimes i comment about my teachers etc,...and i tell her a lot of jokes just in order to put a smile on her face and make her laugh ....and the same is with my sister , i usually try to tell funny things because otherwise she hasn't got a lot of time to spend with me due to homework...

but all what i say to them is clearly un-necessary , but i can't imagine talking always about religion , so how should i behave with them , how can i develop a good relation without talking too much or is this type of talking allowed as far as u don't do backbitting for instance etc....

 

[sky_012]

wow 22 views and no reply is my question islamically incorrect

at least please someone correct me and forgive me for my ignorance

:wassalam:

 

[arabiantxn]

we are trying to talk and type less

 

[Abdul-Raheem]

:salam2:

I don't think there's nothing wrong with that, like you said, the prophet encouraged us to keep good ties with our family. Just make sure you don't over do it

 

[ripefig]

:salam2:

If you are not backbiting you are doing just fine. Talking a lot with your Mum or siblings is a good thing. It bonds you and keeps you close as a family. Talking about the teachers and school etc let them know what is going on in your life. Generally speaking, whatever comes out of our mouth should be kind good words or words that will have a positive impact on the people around us. However sometimes we need to vent our frustrations and who better to do it with than our families. I am away from my family for more than ten years now and beleive me I miss those talks

 

[Mabsoot]

Hadith Time for This and time for That

assalamu Alaykum. There is nothing wrong with spending time with your family and friends and talking with them about other things. Just do not waste too much of your time gossiping and saying things that have little benefit to you. What you mention about your day in school or about things you did are good. It is normal conversation that helps develop relationship and closeness in your family.

Your conversations do not all have to be Islamic. People who say that other talk is vain and bad are wrong, as long as you are not talking about sinful things. Then it is fine and allowed. How are you expected to conduct your business and your life? Nobody can be devoted 24/7, it is very difficult to do. We are Humans!!!! and Islam is easy. We follow the example of the Companions.

Please read the following Hadith.

A hadith from Hanzalah al-Usayyidee who said: "Abu Bakr met me and asked: How are you O Hanzalah? I Replied: Hanzalah is guilty of hypocrisy! He said: Free is Allah and far removed from all defects! What are you saying? I said: When we are with Allah's Messenger saw and he reminds us of the Fire and Paradise it is as if we were seeing it with our own eyes. Then when we depart from Allah's Messenger and attend our wives, our children and our business, then much of this slips from our mind. Abu Bakr said: By Allah we also experience the same. So I went with Abu Bakr until we entered upon Allah's Messenger. I said: Hanzalah is guilty of hypocrisy O Messenger of Allah. So Allah's Messenger said: And how is that? I said When we are with you, you remind us of the Fire and of Paradise and it is as if we are seeing it with our own eyes. Then when we depart from you and attend our wives, our children and our business then much of this slips from our minds. So Allah's Messenger said: By Him in whose hand is my soul if you remained continually as you are when you are with me and in remembering (Allah) then the angels would shake hands with you upon your beds and upon your roads. But O Hanzalah, (there is) a time for this and a time for that, (there is) a time for this and a time for that, (there is) a time for this and a time for that." (Sahih Muslim)

So there are times for prayer, talking about Islam and there are times where you are doing business, sleeping, eating, playing etc. And some of those activities do overlap in Islamic context. Like we say Bismillah when we eat, and maintaining good relations with our family, playing with children etc is also rewarded by Allah, the Most High. By sticking to the Quran and Sunnah the true sources of Islam, and having the correct understanding from the pious predecessors (i.e. the Companions of the Prophet and the early generation of Muslims) we would be living our lives the best way.

We as humans, can not be expected to always be thinking about hellfire and heaven and keep serious 24/7. And, it would be extremism to do that. Muslims are always following the Middle way.

"Allah intends for you ease, and does not want to make things difficult for you" [2:185];

Such easiness is well explained in the hadeeth reported by Abu Hurairah, radiya Allahu 'anhu, that the Prophet, salla Allaahu 'alaihe wasallam, said, "Religion is easy..." [Bukhari], he also said; "The best of your religion, is the easiest." [Ahmad]

The easiness of this religion was put into practise by the best of humanity, the one who came to deliver the message, as Allah, subhanahu wata'aala, said;

"Verily there has come unto you a Messenger from amongst yourselves, it grieves him that you should suffer any difficulty, he is anxious for you, for the believers he is full of pity and merciful" [10:128]

Therefore a middle way is always taken. Patience is one of the greatest virtues a Muslim can have.

"And verily, whosoever shows patience and forgives, that would truly be from the things recommended by Allah.'' (42:43)

The Messenger of Allah saw said,"Allah shows compassion only to those among His slaves who are compassionate".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:The Messenger of Allah saw said, "The strong man is not one who is good at wrestling, but the strong man is one who controls himself in a fit of rage.''
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

 

[sky_012]

Jazak Allah brothers and sisters for the replies; sincerely it helped me understand this point but other important points as well concerning how we should behave in our personal lives ; sincerely Jazak Allah

i've noticed and observed my behaviour and Alhamdullilah i've noticed that even if i deviate from the good things while i'm talking or if i 'm starting really talking too much ; Alhamdullilah as every parent, my parents stop me as well and this helps to me to regulate and improve the content of what i say;

so Quran, Suannah and hadith give us the points to take into consideration and our parents are also a part of this to help us to stay on the right things and don't fall inbackbitting for instance...


:wassalam:

 

[sistadinn]

as-salamu alaykum wr wb

A hadith from Hanzalah al-Usayyidee who said: "Abu Bakr met me and asked: How are you O Hanzalah? I Replied: Hanzalah is guilty of hypocrisy! He said: Free is Allah and far removed from all defects! What are you saying? I said: When we are with Allah's Messenger saw and he reminds us of the Fire and Paradise it is as if we were seeing it with our own eyes. Then when we depart from Allah's Messenger and attend our wives, our children and our business, then much of this slips from our mind. Abu Bakr said: By Allah we also experience the same. So I went with Abu Bakr until we entered upon Allah's Messenger. I said: Hanzalah is guilty of hypocrisy O Messenger of Allah. So Allah's Messenger said: And how is that? I said When we are with you, you remind us of the Fire and of Paradise and it is as if we are seeing it with our own eyes. Then when we depart from you and attend our wives, our children and our business then much of this slips from our minds. So Allah's Messenger said: By Him in whose hand is my soul if you remained continually as you are when you are with me and in remembering (Allah) then the angels would shake hands with you upon your beds and upon your roads. But O Hanzalah, (there is) a time for this and a time for that, (there is) a time for this and a time for that, (there is) a time for this and a time for that."
(Sahih Muslim)

mashaAllah !!!
barakAllahu fik(i) akhi/oukhti
so so beautiful

:salam2:

 

[zarah]

Assalamu Alaikum

:salam2:

Jazzak-Allah khair for the question and answer brother and sister.

 

[truesuccess]

:salam2:

What i want to say is already explained by brother Mabsoot in very beautiful manner.


ISLAM brings PEACE, Hatred brings PIECES

:salam2:

 

[faiz_fauzi]

Very good hadith.
Brother mabsoot u are very good at finding proper HADITH.
Should learn more from u.

JazakALLAHU Khair!

 

[sky_012]

^^exactly brother in islam, we shoul all learn from the ones who have a great knowledge

:wassalam: