Resentment and Sadness: Is it a Sin???

Discussion in 'TurnToIslam Lounge !' started by Precious Star, Jun 29, 2011.

  1. Precious Star
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    Precious Star Junior Member

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    Ok, here's the deal. I've posted about this before, and after reviewing everyone's comments, I went back to the drawing board and explored my options again. My mother told me there is no one she knows who can help me get married, including imams (she asked), friends, relatives, etc. I actually told my mother to ask more learned people in the community and she said no, there is no point.

    Today, I wrote down the essence of what is happening to me. Here it is:
    I find myself questioning Allah SWT. I have prayed a great deal for marriage but it never happened. My parents did not help, either. I live in a non-muslim country; in fact, I was born here. I wonder, if there is no leeway for a muslim girl to marry a non-muslim man, why did my parents immigrate to this country and have children, only to tell me that getting married is not possible? I don't think that is fair. I read a lot of dua, but lately when I am speaking to God during my dua, I feel like in my heart it will not come true. After all, I am 40 and I've been reading the dua for over 15 years. In my dua, I ask Allah to please make 2011 more joyous than 2010 (I was briefly happy in 2010 because of someone I met, and had some hope then but it fell sharply). It is now July 2011, and I am still so sad. When I make this dua, I feel like I am "testing" God, because I know that He has not answered that prayer for me. When I ask my elders about getting married, they say to do dua because there is no other way. Am I being sinful for questioning my dua? Its been so many years that I have been praying, and I also do Istikhara and Salaat ul Hajaat. To me, it appears that God has given me His answer for now. Is it sinful to think that way? I have also been experiencing "resentment" towards Islam lately. The other day I told a non-muslim friend, an older lady who is like a mother to me, that if I had married the nonmuslim man then I would have gone to hell. She was shocked to hear that and told me that only very bad, immoral people go to hell, like murderers. I then had to question myself - if I want to get married, but the muslim community does not help me nor do my parents, will God nevertheless send me to Hell because I had no other options? Will God punish the muslim community for failing to create marriage opportunities for muslim women like myself? (Don't worry, I have no intention of seeking out a non-muslim man for marriage!)
    I just feel so guilty for harboring these thoughts. To be honest, I feel a bit like I want to "take a break" from all this dua and begging God, as it has left me emotionally and spiritually exhausted. Is that sinful? Why must I constantly think of my actions in terms of sin or reward? Will God have mercy on me because I am undergoing a test in life, that is, because I have prayed for a family of my own but those prayers have not come true and i now have to face a life alone? I must be honest that I am angry about that...angry because I did everythign right, I was obedient to my parents, relied on them for everything, and they did not take this aspect of my life seriously. Will God punish me for being angry?

    The other day I had to have some minor surgery. It was very private. I had to travel to another city. My parents did not know. I took the train the night before, stayed in a hotel, then went to the hospital at 7 am the next morning. I had the procedure and it was not fun! I had to wear a gown, get an iv in my vein, get injected with a bunch of pain medications, wear a pad afterwards to catch the bleeding. Then, at the end of the day, I was released and took a train back to my home city. i left my car at the train station, so when I got to my city I drove home, stopping on the way to the pharmacy to pick up my medication.

    I was crying yesterday in the hospital bed, with the curtain around me, my pillow was so wet because I was all alone, with no one to hold my hand or tell me it would be ok. there was a young arab girl next to my bed, and her husband was with her the whole time, comforting her, putting her clothes away in her locker, etc.

    Is this what God has destined for me? Why couldn't my parents have helped me more? When you read dua for a good outcome over and over, for years on end, and repent when you slip up and ask for forgiveness, why do things GET WORSE? I know there are others who are worse off than me, but its all relative. And if you ask my parents about it, they always just shrug their shoulders and say "oh well." When I was in my 20s and 30s, no one in my family ever talked about my marriage. No one ever said to me, "Insha'Allah someone will come along soon so you can have a family of your own." Not my father, not my brothers, no one. My mother only mentioned it when I raised the issue. All my life, it has been my non-muslim friends and colleagues who have said to me, "Oh, I hope you meet someone soon" or "it would be so nice if you could get married, I would hate to see yo spend your life alone." Somehow, the muslims who have surrounded me, missed the boat on this one. Its like, my obedience backfired on me!

    My mom actually thinks that since so much time has passed, I should just find anybody, muslim or nonmuslim. How can she even say that? She herself is so religious!
  2. Precious Star
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    Precious Star Junior Member

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    I don't live in the U.K.
  3. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    Assalamua'aalaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,

    Dearest Sister, how are you feeling at the moment? I hope you are feeling lighter and better from the moment that you write your post ( Insha Allaah, I pray for that ).

    First of all, I want you to know that my heart goes all out for you throughout reading your story. And wallahi, I can hear my heart making dua'a silently inside when I read about your minor surgery. May Allaah grant you with a good health, Ameen.

    Sister, I know its been so long. . . 15 years and I'm sure it wasn't an easy one. Though knowing that maybe you are already aware of this, as a sister in Islam who loves you for the sake of Allaah, I would like to share with you again that : No, sister, you must keep praying to Allaah and keep on asking around, giving out the best efforts that you can (to find any man who is good in his deen) and don't ever stop. Never stop putting your hope to Allaah. Also, it is important that you think good (husnu dhon) to Allaah as Allaah loves you very much. Allaah's loves towards the mu'mineen outweighs the dearly love of a mother to her child. In a hadeeth (I don't have much references with me atm, so will attach it shortly, inshaAllaah), it has been said that Allaah loves His Slaves more than a mother who is breastfeeding her baby (out of love). And how Allaah is happier when His Slave repents to him sincerely, happier than a man who has gone looking for his lost camel in the desert and finally found it. (Imagine that feeling!)

    The story of Rabiaah Al-Adawiyah - have you heard about it? That she was once a slave and a very devoted muslimah. One night, when her master saw her praying deeply to Allaah, with tears in her dua'a (out of love for Allaah), he felt touched and released her. Among her dua was that "Ya Allaah, if I am worshipping you for the sake of Jannaah, do send me to An-Naar (Hell) . But make me among those who worship you *out of love*, out of hope to see Your Mighty Face someday". . MashaAllaah. And she never got married as her love towards Allaah outweighs everything. (Hopefully no questioning about this - her not being married, as I believe she was one of Allaah's chosen slaves).

    In another hadeeth, a woman came to Rasulullah sallahu alayhi wa sallam, asking him :saw: to make dua'a so that her disease will be cured. But he :saw: said that he :saw: either can make dua'a so that Allaah heals her or she can bear with the pain but eventually granted with Jannah. And she (the woman) chosed to bear with the pain. Mashaa Allaah.

    Sister, I don't know what is there for me to help you other than making dua'a for yourself and helping you with supports. As for other means, its all on you (with the help from Allaah) to remain strong and steadfast in this road. Your heart knows best which is wrong and right (as you would never marry a non-Muslim no matter what, reagrdless of your current condition) so this shows that your heart is still "alive". Mashaa Allaah. All praises belongs to Allaah, Alhamdulillah. How many who is going through the same test but had chosed the wrong path? How many have suffered because they made their decision not out of faith but out of desires? I do believe that you *will* remain strong, sister. InshaAllaah, do it for the sake of Allaah and the Ummaah.

    Do remember that, Allaah is there, listening to every seconds of your dua'a and pain. Always and always will be. Perhaps the reason why He hasn't answer your prayer is that He is *longing* to hear you weep, beg and humble yourself in front of Him. And that is among the reasons why Allaah subhaanahu wa Ta'ala kept from answering His Slaves' prayers. :)

    Shall I leave you with 2 verses that InshaAllaah should boost your strength, bi ithnillah.

    "Or do you think that you will enter Paradise while such [trial] has not yet come to you as came to those who passed on before you? They were touched by poverty and hardship and were shaken until [even their] messenger and those who believed with him said,"When is the help of Allah ?" Unquestionably, the help of Allah is near" Al-Baqarah, 2 : 214

    "But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not." Al-Baqarah, 2 : 216

    Sister, to be honest, I have that feelings too. To get married though people at my age don't think much about it. In fact, when such topic is brought up, they are like "What? Its not time to talk about it yet". Whenever I see cute babies and innocent little children, my heart suddenly feels overly-excited. The feelings of wanting to have my *own* kids grow. Regardless, I try telling myself that, inshaAllaah when the time has come, Allaah will let me know about it. In the meantime, I am going to try my best in perfecting myself in terms of knowledge, faith and akhlaaq. InshaAllaah, I pray for the same to you too, sister.

    I shall go now as I don't wish to hijack your thread :) Know that my dua'a is with you and all those being in the same boat.

    I'm sincerely sorry if I have said anything wrong or inappropriate.

    *hugs*

    :wasalam:
  4. sana2230
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    sana2230 New Member

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    well said sister
  5. arzafar
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    arzafar Junior Member

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    It is not allowed to marry a non-muslim. Also obedience to parents is not the same as obedience to God - meaning you can disobey parents if they tell you to do something that is clearly not good for your life. The rest of the things you posted - some of them are bordering on apostasy so avoid that path.

    dua alone is not enough. you still have to be proactive. infact your parents should have married you when you were younger. You and your parents should not have set your demands too high. It is difficult to find a suitable partner at an older age, however it is not impossible. so you should continue dua and redouble your efforts of finding a groom. Also lower the expectations that you have from a future husband. finally, what will happen is already written so just be aware that things are out of your hands and sometimes you have to hold your hands up and accept that.

    last advice that will help you forever. Do istikhara.
    NEVER take life, career and financial advice from women or other women in your case. There is a reason why most successful managers, ceos, investors, entrepreneurs and decision makers are men. Basically avoid women when you need to make an important/difficult decision in your life. You could toss a coin instead - at least there is a 50% chance of getting the call right.
  6. sana2230
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    sana2230 New Member

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    seriously?:cool:

    just imagine what your mum would think of you if she read your post brother..........
  7. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    ^^ Yeah, the comment was a bit offensive. However, Sister Sana, knowing what sort of words or responds that Brother Arzafar gives most of the time (bold and straight-forward), I won't have any hard feelings about it.

    No offence, Bro Arzafar. :wink:

    Anyways, take that which one thinks that will bring good and benefits to her/himself and put aside those which do not, inshaAllaah.

    Wa'alaykum as-salaam.
  8. Ahsen
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    Ahsen Junior Member

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    Why don't you move to another country.Is it important that you have to marry someone only in your country.
  9. FreedomFighter
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    FreedomFighter Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    Do you know any brothers? Come on, there has got to be someone.
  10. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam walaikum,

    You are inside the box and I am outside the box..so I pray my words can make sense to you.

    I am not going to be condescending out of respect for your age.

    When we pray and supplicate we can not wish for the supplication to be answered right here right now. It doesn't work that way. Some supplications are answered within a second and sometimes it seems an eon.

    You know, InshaAllah, you will be married. If not here in this life, we are guaranteed mates in the next. Does that make us less beings in this life?

    Betchya by golly no.

    It makes us stronger believers sister. I can fix a car; a toilet; wash houses, paint, I learned a high heel shoe makes a great hammer. We gain skills our married sisters could not even dream about.

    So hang in there.

    Besides...take a moment to think this out. What are the qualities in a husband you want. Be specific in your supplication. You can broaden the range for a husband. You have the choice from a 25 year old to a sixty something year old. Do not allow others to decide your fate for you.

    I am going to write something and it is not directed at you; do not limit the choice of a husband to someone exclusively from the culture of your parents. Muslims are everywhere. He does not have to be a doctor or a lawyer. He can be a humble pious man. He can be black, white, brown, purple for that matter.

    Resentment and sadness..is it a sin. Yes.
    We are told over and over again to praise Allah at all times. Sabr and salat.
    OK so someone is married and happy. Alhumdullila. Does that take away from me. No.

    I have been married and divorced twice. And I still have hopes, Insha'Allah, I will find a pious companion to drive 100 miles an hour on the freeway with me at the wheels!!

    Do good deeds, sister. Make your life full. Give of yourself. Do volunteer work. Continue with your education. Learn more about Islam.

    I wish I could sit down and have a cup of coffee with you. We would laugh so much we would be crying.

    Turn the sadness into joy. Yes, it can be done. Everything Allah gives us is a blessing. Everything.
    Sister, think of how full your heart is with compassion for others.

    It is your choice to drink vinegar or mango lassi. Personally, I like mango lussi.

    And yes, go check out the matrimonial websites..if for nothing else than a good laugh with a girlfriend. Each day do something positive for yourself.

    I will keep you close to my hear in my dua. I believe and I know Allah's word is true. Hold on to your faith, sister.

    Rest sister. You are not alone and InshaAllah, you will have your hearts desire. Just take a moment to analyze what it is your heart desires. Do not blame your parents or community.

    And wipe out the thought of marrying a kuffir. They ain't no good.


    PS: As for the brother...chill out man. I will forgive you..as the Prophet, the best of men, took advice from women. And he had to deal with something a little more worthy than what CEO"S et. al. He was dealing with the salvation of mankind.
  11. Isra
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    Isra aka Tree2008

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    As salamo alaikome

    Brother are you serious? I mean REALLY? Come on what century are you living in? :lol::SMILY309:

    All joking aside brother do you have some proof for your statements? Can you back up what you say with authentic hadith or a verse in Quran? If not brother I seriously think you should keep your opinions out of it and give the sister advice that is Islamically sound! Besides you have offended just about every sister on this forum in case you arent aware!

    Wa salam
  12. Precious Star
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    Precious Star Junior Member

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    Aapa,I would say that praying for over 15 years, and then becoming disheartened at age 4o, does not reflect an attitude of "oh why won't my supplication be answered right here right now". I don't think that is a fair accusation. I am on the brink of menopause, literally. You have 2 children. All i want is a proposal and a shot at one pregnancy. So I really don't think that waiting during the entirety of my childbearing years and then becoming sad about the passage of same means that I am impatient.

    But yes, i have to accept "what is" at the moment.

    I know I may be married in the next life. That is a non-issue - it is promised to us. The prayers I make are for a spouse and children in this life, so that I am loved and I love, so that I can spend the life that God has given me on earth, with a family of my own. Just because I pray for a family of my own in this life does not mean I am negating or minimizing what will be given to me in the next life. However, i always caution people when they tell me what waits in Paradise. The Quran talks of Paradise in metaphorical terms...it is a realm and existence that is foreign and unknown to us, hence we can't use this life as a point of reference.

    I know your comments weren't directed entirely to me personally, because I do not and never have really wanted someone from my parents' culture. I think south asian culture is regressive and close minded. I want to marry a muslim, but not a "_____- muslim", if you know what I mean. I have a huge criticism of the muslim ummah, and that is that when they hear of an older unmarried muslim women, they ASSUME that she has all these lofty criteria that make it impossible for her to find someone, such as a man's education, finances, cultural background, etc. No one has the right to make such assumptions, no one. The fact is, I was taught to be obedient and refrain from seeking out the opposite sex. I was told that my parents would help me find a husband. i fulfilled my part of the bargain. And that's where it ended. There was no rejection of man after man becaue he wasn't pakistani, was not a lawyer, did not earn 6 figures, etc. And yes, I have spent the better part of the last 6 years (i.e. since i could afford to buy a computer of my own) perusing online matrimonials, usually with a laugh but many times with tears.

    The real reason I wrote here was because I was seeking peace in my heart. I am noticing so many changes in me due to my age..my skin, my menstrual periods, etc...and I see my parents getting elderly...and I know that my years of prayers for a family of my own haven't come to fruition. There are certain laws of nature that God does not tamper with, unless He wishes to create a miracle. I have no access to single muslim men, and I don't really know how dua can magically turn that around. I need peace in my heart so I can accept that I don't have what I wanted. I'm not talking about a car, or a house, or a fur coat, or granite countertops, or a diamond necklace, or mango lussi...I'm talking about half my deen. I hate lussi anyway. Resentment is not on purpose. It sneaks up on you, because in your heartache you try desperately to replace what you desire with something else, and you realize that you can't easily find a substitute for love.
  13. ditta
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    ditta Alhamdu'Lillaah Staff Member

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    As-salaamu'Alaykum wa'Rahmatullaah,

    Sister, I read your post, so I thought I would try to find something that would help me and you when we supplicate to Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala):

    Question

    I spent the last ten years, on and off, asking Allah Almighty to provide me with a righteous husband and with righteous children. But some of this never happened, and I know that it is Allah's will and that there is nothing that can ward off his decree. My question is this: I have stopped supplicating since a short time ago, not from despair for an answer to my prayers, but because I began to think that what I was asking for was not in my best interests. I thought this because Allah Almighty did not answer me. I decided to desist from supplicating because Allah Almighty knows best what will benefit me, regardless of my strong and persistent desire to have my prayers realized. What must I do in this situation? Do I continue supplicating, or do I resign myself to the fact that what I am asking for is not in my best interests, and thus stop asking?

    Answer


    It is mentioned in a Hadith that the worshipper's supplication will be answered, as long as he does not hurry, feeling that the answer is delayed, then lamenting the delay, and then abandoning supplicating altogether. This person says, "I supplicated and I supplicated, but I was not answered." Allah Almighty may delay answering a prayer for a number of reasons. And in one Hadith, it is mentioned that Allah Almighty gives one of three things to the one who invokes Him: He answers his prayer by giving to him what he asks, He saves his reward for the Hereafter, or He repels an evil from him.

    So, sister, you should not be hasty; rather, you should continue supplicating, even if this continues for many more years. Also, you should not reject an equal (equal in looks, lineage, wealth, etc.) if he proposes to you, even if he is old or is already married. Perhaps, Allah will give you much good in that.


    Ibn Jibreen (may Allah have mercy on him).

    (Fatawa Islamiyah, Vol. 7, Supplication).


    Abu Hurayrah (radhiyAllaahu anh) reported: The Messenger of Allah :saw::

    “The supplication of every one of you will be granted if he does not get impatient and say (for example):


    ‘I supplicated my Rubb but my prayer has not been granted.”


    (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).


    The narration of Muslim is:


    “The supplication of a slave continues to be granted as long as he does not supplicate for a sinful thing or for something that would cut off the ties of kinship and he does not grow impatient."


    It was said:


    "O Messenger of Allah :saw: What does growing impatient mean?"

    He said, "It is one's saying:


    I supplicated again and again but I do not think that my prayer will be answered.'

    Then he becomes frustrated (in such circumstances) and gives up supplication altogether."


    Commentary:
    We learn from this Hadith that one should continue beseeching Allah without ever thinking that in spite of praying for a long time, his prayer has not been granted. One should never allow frustration to overcome in his mind. If a person’s supplication is not granted for a long time, there would be certainly some good for him in that delay the reason of which is known to Allah Alone. It is, therefore, essential that he should never cease to pray whether his prayer is granted or not. Persistence in prayer is certainly beneficial to him.

    (Riyaad-us-Saaliheen, The Book of Supplications).


    Sister, we are all weak, we have our low points, we are sinners but we have Hope that Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala) will guide us, forgive us for our sins and accept our supplications. What will help us when we supplicate to Allah is that we have hope in Him and truly believe Allah will answer our supplication by knowing Him. Below is an excerpt from the 'Belief in Allah' thread.

    We know that Allah (The Exalted), bears the attribute of knowledge, and that He has called Himself by a number of Names which reflect this attribute, such as Al-‘Aleem (All-Knowing):

    Verily, He only He, is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower.

    (Qur’aan 26: 220)


    Another of these Names is Al-Khabeer (the All-Aware), which means that He knows what will be before it happens; Al-Hakeem (the Wise), which means that He knows the details of things; Ash-Shaheed (the Witness), which that He knows what is unseen and what is seen, i.e. that nothing is unknown to Him; Al-Haafiz (the Protector), meaning that He does not forget what He knows; Al-Muhsiy (the Reckoner), which means that the fact that He knows so much does not distract Him from knowing the tiniest of details, such as the light of the day and how strong the wind is, and when the leaves fall. He knows the numbers and the movements of each leaf.


    Therefore, do not lose Hope in the One is Aware of All Things.

    Under the Greatness of Allahs Hearing and Sight:

    Allah (The Exalted), hears and sees the righteous, and reward them:

    Who sees you (O’ Muhammad :saw:) when you stand up (along at night for Tahajjud prayers). And your movements among those who fall prostrate (to Allah in the five compulsory congregational prayers). Verily, He, only He, is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower.


    (Qur’aan 26: 218-220)

    Also sister, I hope this supplication helps:

    d –
    Ibn ‘Abbaas (radhiyAllahu anh) narrated that the Messenger of Allah :saw: used to say at times of distress:


    “Laa ilaaha illa Allah al-‘Azeem al-Haleem, laa ilaaha illa Allah Rabb ul-‘Arsh il-‘Azeem, Laa ilaaha illa Allah Rabb us-samawaati wa Rabb ul-ard, Rabb ul-‘Arsh il-kareem


    (There is no god except Allah, the Most Great, the Ever Forbearing, there is no god except Allah, the Lord of the Mighty Throne, there is no god except Allah, the Lord of the heavens and the Lord of the earth, Lord of the Noble Throne.”

    (Bukhari, 11/145; Muslim, 4/2093, hadeeth no. 2730)


    Also, I don't understand, what does your mother mean, there is no point. Often families will have links to other families, who will in turn know other families. Simply, there is a huge network. I do not know your home situation sister but sit down with your mother (and/or with your brothers) and push them gently (i.e. to try harder in searching the network) because the situation you are in is not good.

    Insha'Allaah, refer to the Belief in Allah thread (from Post #84) because I feel it really helps that we know Allah from the Qur'aan and Sunnah, understand His Greatness which will reinforce our Hope in Him which will reflect in our determination when we supplicate (that Allah will answer).

    I don't know the situation of those seeking marriage and they might refer to matrimonial websites. However below is a link to a post regarding the Woes of Internet Courting (http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?p=470837#post470837).

    I realise not everyone will be able to have access to these "family networks" and might need to use a matrimonial website. Therefore I hope the above link is helpful advice. (Edit: I removed the recommendation of matrimonial websites as per the above although it appears you have referred to such sites in the past).

    May Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala) make it easy for you in search of your spouse and may Allah strengthen mine and your faith in Him, so that we ask Him Alone, correctly Hope in Him and that we are among those who are patient. Ameen.
  14. Precious Star
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    Precious Star Junior Member

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    Why do you say that i have set my expectations too high? Shall I marry a criminal convict?

    Most managers, ceos, and entrepreuneurs ARE men...but the successful ones are women. I am afraid you have your statistics all wrong. Most medical, dental and law schools right now consist of over 50% women, with most of those women getting the top marks in their classes. The best decision makers are not men...they are women, and as an example: our mothers.
  15. Precious Star
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    Precious Star Junior Member

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    Thank you Ditta.
  16. Just a Guy
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    Just a Guy Reinventing Myself

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    I'm curious now... where are you, Precious Star?
  17. shaheeda35
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    shaheeda35 strive4Jannah

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    :salam2:
    Sister....I feel you and I know how you feel. I am 39 years old, three kids and divorced twice. I still pray and make duaa because it is our weapon and it is very powerful, Alhamdullilah. Finding a life partner is very hard, but giving up is not the answer, you keep going! Marrying a non-muslim will get you no where and it is haraam, dont disobey Allah....a definite no no!

    You are 40 years old...you can try some halal marriage sites. One I know that is very good is www.halfyourdeen.com. I know of a few marriages that were successful on there....branch out, there are a lot of resources out there!
    Never give up on duaa and keep praying, even though you think it wont help, it will, Allah does answer prayers,its just not when we want it!
  18. Just a Guy
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    Just a Guy Reinventing Myself

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    I am 35 and have never been married. So don't feel like you're the only one.
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    Isra aka Tree2008

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    As salamo alaikome

    Wow seems to me Precious Star and Just a Guy have alot in common! :wink: Maybe its fate that you posted this thread so he could find you! You never know! Allah works miracles this way too sometimes! Im thinking a 5 year age difference is not so bad hmmmmmm?????

    I wish you both all of the blessings Allah can give to you. Be patient and perservere! May Allah keep you safe and make your life easier Ameen!

    Wa salam
  20. Asja
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    Asja Pearl of Islaam

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    Wa allaicumu saalam dear sister

    Mashallah that is very good idea for our sister but as well for our brother. :hijabi:

    I pray to Allah it make it destiny for you, but if is not destiny than dear sister and respected brother, do never loose faith in Allah,and do not forget that duas of one beliver can change his or her destiny if he rely completely on help of Allah, SubhanAllah.

    And I advice you as well to make Istighar, asking forgivness of Allah, as asking forgivness of Allah can bring us more baraqah in this life and in hereafter.

    May Allah help you my sisters and brothers.Ameen ya Rabby

    :wasalam:

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