Ibn_hassan
Servant of Allah
Below are some Islamic principles,both general and specific, to consider if you will be be meeting or seeking a potential spouse for yourself or someone else at a conference, lecture, the mosque or another event:
1. Ask yourself: Why am I getting married.
Because all of my friends are' is not a legitimate reason. This is a good question to ask even if you are meeting the person to make a final decision because it will be a reminder about the real purpose of marriage from an Islamic perspective.
Marriage, from an Islamic perspective, is part of faith and it is part of the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).
2. Ask yourself: what am I looking for in a spouse.
Abu Hurairah related that the Prophet Muhammad said: “Men choose women for four reasons: for their money, for their rank, for their beauty and for their religion, but marry one who is religious and you will succeed” (Bukhari, Muslim).
This of course, applies to women as well.
3. If you're looking for a spouse lower your gaze.
This may seem like a contradiction, but it's not. Looking for a spouse who has the right qualities and whom you are physically attracted to does not mean throwing out the obligation to lower the gaze for both sexes and leering or ogling the person.
“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do” (Quran 24:30)
4. Get someone to help
Marriage is not something to throw yourself into all by yourself. Getting the help of someone, especially parents, relatives, an Imam, and/or respected and trustworthy members of the Muslim community to either look for the right spouse and initiate and participate in a communication process is very important.
In fact, even some non-Muslims have come to see this as a more viable way of meeting someone instead of getting involved in the disappointing dating game or picking someone up in a nightclub or bar.
5. When you meet, don't be alone
mar related that Rasulullah said: “Whenever a man is alone with a woman the Shaytan makes a third” (Tirmidhi).
Meeting alone, in the hotel room of one or the other potential spouse for example, is forbidden.
The two cannot be in a situation where no one else can see or hear them.
6. When you speak, be businesslike and to the point.
The purpose of meeting and talking to each other must also remain within Islamic guidelines. That means no flirtatious speech of a sexual nature on either side.
Surely Allah will help you if you abide by these principles and you will succeed in your marriage.
1. Ask yourself: Why am I getting married.
Because all of my friends are' is not a legitimate reason. This is a good question to ask even if you are meeting the person to make a final decision because it will be a reminder about the real purpose of marriage from an Islamic perspective.
Marriage, from an Islamic perspective, is part of faith and it is part of the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).
2. Ask yourself: what am I looking for in a spouse.
Abu Hurairah related that the Prophet Muhammad said: “Men choose women for four reasons: for their money, for their rank, for their beauty and for their religion, but marry one who is religious and you will succeed” (Bukhari, Muslim).
This of course, applies to women as well.
3. If you're looking for a spouse lower your gaze.
This may seem like a contradiction, but it's not. Looking for a spouse who has the right qualities and whom you are physically attracted to does not mean throwing out the obligation to lower the gaze for both sexes and leering or ogling the person.
“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do” (Quran 24:30)
4. Get someone to help
Marriage is not something to throw yourself into all by yourself. Getting the help of someone, especially parents, relatives, an Imam, and/or respected and trustworthy members of the Muslim community to either look for the right spouse and initiate and participate in a communication process is very important.
In fact, even some non-Muslims have come to see this as a more viable way of meeting someone instead of getting involved in the disappointing dating game or picking someone up in a nightclub or bar.
5. When you meet, don't be alone
mar related that Rasulullah said: “Whenever a man is alone with a woman the Shaytan makes a third” (Tirmidhi).
Meeting alone, in the hotel room of one or the other potential spouse for example, is forbidden.
The two cannot be in a situation where no one else can see or hear them.
6. When you speak, be businesslike and to the point.
The purpose of meeting and talking to each other must also remain within Islamic guidelines. That means no flirtatious speech of a sexual nature on either side.
Surely Allah will help you if you abide by these principles and you will succeed in your marriage.