The Benifit of Trials

Discussion in 'TurnToIslam Lounge !' started by Aapa, Jan 20, 2013.

  1. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam alaikum,

    It is one thing to read the Glorious Quran and learn about trials and tribulations.

    It is quite another when the rug gets pulled under your feet. When you enter the world of what did I do to be here, in this position. Those dark days when there is no friend around. When you scream out for help and you hear you echo. The world becomes so small you can not even see your shadow. You cry so much that even tears abandon you.

    Yet, you stick to dua. In the lonely abyss of life you cry out to Allah subhana wa taala. You need arms to embrace you and you get thorns. But, you continue your dua. You are abandoned by everyone. You walk alone. You are dejected and rejected. You are pushed to the point of examining your faith. You think about doing something foolish. The acts of the kufr. They are always having a good time. Yet, you hold on to your faith.

    Slowly, you become stronger. You hold onto the words of Allah subhana wa taala when He says Which of the wonders do you deny. Like a child you ponder over your blessings. I hate that. I have so many blessings I can't even commiserate on my misery. He has given all to me.

    Trials make us stronger. The universe opens up. We are rid of the per-conceived notions we hold for ourselves. In spiritual terms we let go of wishful thinking.

    And that is the thing about trials. We let go of that which we think is the best for us. We learn to rely on the Wisdom of the Maker. Not an easy thing to do. Our egos filled with arrogance tell us that what we know is best for us.

    It seems that the best remedy for arrogance is trial. Trials do wear you out. You feel like you need to sleep for a century. Yet, when you emerge from the testing you have energy.

    I read somewhere that the most important relationship we have is with Allah subhana wa taala. He Loves us. And no matter where we are in this phase of life, living here in this existence, as long as we recognize that He Loves us, me, simple little old me, it's gonna be ok. And as long as I call out to Him, He will take care of me.

    In hindsight one of the biggest blessings He gives us are His tests.

    Alhumdullila, Alhumdullila,Alhumdullila.
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  2. Precious Star
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    Yeah, there is another word for what you are describing: Giving up. Resignation. Acceptance. Quel sera sera.

    It is a remedy. And it makes you want to sleep forever -- that, I agree with. Dua does not change destiny. Just remember that.
  3. islamerica
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    islamerica 1 Ummah under God

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    I would have to disagree with this.

    The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Nothing can change the Divine decree except du’aa’. (Narrated by Ahmad, 5/677; Ibn Maajah, 90; al-Tirmidhi, 139. Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 76687. See also al-Saheehah, 145).

    Of course, there are other things that can interfere as well.

    There is also the possibility of what one is going through either a punishment, a trial or an evil eye and black magic. A person can get evil eye from an envious person and magic done from an enemy.

    Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The evil eye is real and if anything were to overtake the divine decree (Qadr), it would be the evil eye..."
  4. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam alaikum,

    Sister Precious Star,

    What I am describing is beyond the giving up. I am describing faith. It means not giving up in the face of everything. It is the holding onto hope. It is remembering that Allah subhana wa taala has told us He answers our prayer. It means having that sense of absolute faith in Him. Beyond the momentary episodes of anguish is the Light.

    Yes, you get tired during the trial. On a larger scale that is life but within the larger scale are smaller trials. That is when we have to step back and count our blessings. You get tired because the realization hits of our fragility in this life. You get tired because of the sense of being alone in the universe. But, that is the surface and you have to plunge deeper. The saying you have to hit rock bottom before you can get up.

    Yes, the evil eye is real. Why are we reminded to lower our gaze. Heaven forbid that we see the evil eye. When we are near one who envies we often have a very physical reaction to them. Or even negative energy. This is a true story. I took on a temporary seasonal job over the holidays. I was a cashier. A customer came to my counter. As she came close to me I got physically sick. She recognized that she was full of negative energy. She apologized for being full of negative energy. I recited Sura Fathia immediately. As soon as I was finished with her I recovered.( My stomach had sharp pains, I broke out in a sweat and I looked very peaked.) I walked off the job shortly thereafter.
  5. uniqueskates
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    uniqueskates Rabbe Zidni Illma

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    Walaikumassalaam Mother.

    There is no doubt that trails and tribulations are a good thing. They make us closer to Allah(SWT), they make us realize that in the end we have to return to Al-Khaliq. But the problem with most of us is, we get worn out due to the trials we face. As you said, the ideas of kuffar start coming up. Most of us, fall for the evil thoughts of Shaytan and end up doing sins which we regret for the rest of our lives.

    Thing is, when we face tough times, (personally) I would need a person, a brother, a sister, a friend, who opens my eyes, shows me the light at the end of the tunnel. Because the trials I face in my day to day life, makes me close my eyes & deny the fact that there is light. At that time, I would need a shoulder. A guide, can be anybody (from a stranger to my mother). It is very difficult & requires lot of courage to gather all your might and motivate oneself. A guide makes the task easy. But are there guides available when you need one?
  6. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    Wa`alaykum as-salaam wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuh,

    Beautifully written, Jazaaki Allaahu khaayr.
  7. Precious Star
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    1. Sometimes the answer is "no".
    2. What you had, Aapa, was a panic attack. You weren't assaulted by a cloud of negative energy. Yes, sometimes reciting the Quran works better than a dose of Ativan (look that medication up if you don't know what it is).


    This entire discussion is metaphysical. Sometimes our lot in life sucks, pure and simple. We can beg and beg from Allah and cry on our prayer mat in the middle of the night, we can make dua while we sleep and and we can fast and read tahajjud etc etc. We can do that for years and years and see no change. Yes there are all sorts of theories -- we are being punished, our trials are better for us, etc. But that is my point. We don't know. Not all dua results in positive change for our lives. I'm not talking about death, I'm talking about life, here on earth. We have a hadith that says "dua changes the divine decree" but how does that happen? Do we have examples of real life? If so, I invite those stories here on TTI. And I can guarantee you that no one will be able to come up with an answer, other than the stories of the Prophets...and we are ordinary mortals, we are NOT akin to the Prophets who were chosen by Allah SWT to have miracles happen to them.
  8. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam alaikum,

    There is only One Guide. When you in a crisis you can only Depend on Allah subhana wa taala. It is good to surround yourself with the faithful. However, these are the times when you go to the one on one conversations. The prayer at three o'clock in the morning. When you make dua and you release yourself to the Mercy of Allah. There is nothing magical. It does not cost any money. It is acknowledgement of your total dependence on Allah. We have examples in the Quran. One of my favorites is that of Musa, ra. Most Merciful of Mercifuls I am in need of something good. It is not necessary to have the knowledge of the scholars. It is the sincerity with which you plea.

    It takes time. For a particular disaster in my life it was ten months of dua. Ten months of carrying a burden and not being able to discuss it with anyone. Ten months of being patient. Ten months of supplication with every salat. Ten months of dua under all conditions. The resolution was less than ten minutes. When it happened I could breathe again.

    He is the Wakil of Alla Affairs. He is our Guide and Protector. I simply placed all my Trust and Faith in him.

    In hindsight, it was easy. I did not need anyone or anything else. He made the Path easy for me.


    Sister Precious Star,

    It was not a panic attack. I am not the one who initiated the conversation. The customer is the one who admitted to her negative energy. I just looked at her. I was fine before and after. She apologized for carrying the negativity. She is the one out of the blue who was negative. Her companion smiled at me. He knew. I told her to let her negativity go. Do not fool yourself into thinking people are unaware of the energy they carry. This woman was honest. She knew it. She was surprised that her energy level was so high it was bouncing off of people.

    The metaphysical is real sister. The journey of our Prophet, swas, attests to the metaphysical. We mere mortals have extraordinary events in our lives. We have to be careful in those arenas. It took me a long time to understand jinns. I am now careful of the temperature of the water as I bathe.
  9. Precious Star
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    1. Yes, you depend on Allah SWT, but He sends you the tools you need. He is not a genie, who will swoop down and make it all better. He acts in a different realm. He sends the tools, if He desires a solution for you. When the tools don't come, then you know that His answer is no, He wants you to accept the lack. When Allah SWT does not clear the path for us, then we know that we are stuck.

    2. Ten months? that is all? how about ten years? how about 15 years? Then we are talking.

    3. Jinns...the temperature of your bathtub water...I am speechless. But I think the topic of jinns and where they can be found...if Allah intends that they should be found...is a topic for another thread.
  10. hayat84
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    hayat84 I'm not what you believe

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    salam 'alikum,I can test it everyday,since I've reverted to Islam.it seems that from the side of the bad sight of people,troubles and trials are increased.from the side of family I thank Allah every minute.but it happens that when other people look at me,I change my humour without being aware..Allah tests our faith in every moment.Making Dua' sometimes makes me feel better,other ones it discourages me,because the feeling I feel during the dua is not the same of the "hard reality" and I sometimes wish not to stop praying for not facing the daily troubles.
  11. Shak78
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    Shak78 Junior Member

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    Can i just have about 3 months w/out any major trials please. I have had more then my fair share these past couple of years, and I will be getting a new apartment for my son and I only. The move will be another trial. I have stayed steadfast in faith but I could use a small break.
  12. OnewithAllah
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    OnewithAllah Banned

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    Okay, please tell me this a prank and you know my friend Ahmad. This is really freaking me out because I had a dream about a woman who had hassad placed on her. This was last week and it was why I made that thread on hassad. what's freaky about this thread is that the woman in my dream was afraid of her bathtub because the spell made a creepy creature live in her water pipe and it would contaminate her water so she wouldn't have proper wudhu. She installed a thermometer and whenever the temperature changes, she would jump out. And there was a boy playing videogames and was unconscious of what's going on because shaytaan was in the tv distracting him. This is scaring me because only my friend Ahmad knows about this dream. N'audhubillaah. Inshallaah it's just a dream.
  13. mezeren
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    mezeren Junior Member

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    Assalamun Aleykum Sister,

    if no more trials than we are dead. Seriously, isn't it the hard times we feel closer to Allah? Those are the times that we feel helpless, poor and in need. Those are the times that we feel the power of Allah. You can take a braek from beleiving Allah if you find another creator to whom you can pray and hope that he can solve your problems. We can take a break from beleiving Allah if we can find somewhere that is out of His Kingdom. Otherwise we should put our head on the ground, cry and ask for help.

    And praying works, if not, Allah would not have wanted us to pray. Our choices effects our destiny and chosing to pray or not to pray is among that choices. Allah associates our destiny with our actions and choices.

    May Allah ease your and every muslims' hardships and help us to stay on the right path, amin.
  14. mezeren
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    mezeren Junior Member

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    Assalamun Aleykum,

    Sister, i think you are so very wrong here. it is not your life that sucks but it seems that you choose to see it that way. if you think some thing is wrong in your life you do try hard to change it and that is praying with your actions. Only praying with your words without doing your part is useless. And, looking at events with a positive, optimistic view is among the actions that you choose or not.

    Looking your life and thinking "it sucks!" is your choice, or thinking like " ok, i did my best but that is where i am now. i am content with what i have, but life goes on, i will keep on trying but this life is not the ultimate goal." is again your choice.

    And we have the examples of real life. They are called the Prophets of Allah. They did not live a miraculous lives, they were humans like you and me. Allah tested them the hardest way. They suffered, tortured, ridiculed, but they have never given up. Miracles sent by Allah for non beleivers to see the truth. Otherwise, they lived a life full of trials just like us. That is the way how pagans of Macca beleived. They asked for an angel prophet because an angel can not be an example for the human. They knew the truth but they did not want to shape their life accordingly. They wanted to follow their desires. But Allah sent a human Massanger for them so that they could take Him as an example. But they HAVE CHOSEN not to follow Him, they HAVE CHOSEN the easy way.
  15. islamerica
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    islamerica 1 Ummah under God

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    I would have to agree with mez here. You can make all the duas you want but if it is not sincere, if you are full of hate and negativity than it won't happen. Someone may have done black magic so you stay single either out of hate or so you are left to take care of your parents only. Someone may have given you evil eye seeing how pretty you are/were 10-15yrs ago. All that could be preventing you from getting what you want. Have been doing duas and reciting surahs given to protect oneself from such evil? When you made duas did you show sabr or did you grow impatient after some time when it didn't come true and then all your duas were just motions , lacking sincerity, having lack of eman or faith in them. Allah does not change our situation till we change first. If you keep blaming Allah for giving you short end of the stick then how much help do you think will get? A self-reflection, change of attitude and look on life is needed otherwise one will grow bitter and hate everything around them. Duas can change destiny but not it is not a magic pill. Are we seeking protection from evil (people,jinn, hassad,sihr,etc), are we being truly sincere in our duas, are we showing sabr, are we in the right frame of mind? Lot of things come into play, it's not as black and white as one may think.

    With that said, this life is a test. Test comes in many shape and forms. Some get married but can't have kids, others may never get married. It's all part of life, but the important part is how do you deal with such a test. Do you show sabr and move on with your life or do you start to grow resentful. If you fail then Allah may leave you in that rut, if you show sabr and perseverance then Allah may end your test and reward you abundantly or wait till you meet Him and then reward you with more than you can imagine. How we chose to live and move forward is up to us.
  16. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    Essential questions for us to think when face with trials:

    1. How do we extract wisdom and grow stronger from the trials?

    2. In which way did it affected our faith? Did it increased our dependency on Allaah or made us further from Him?
  17. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    [Making separate post as to not let our focus shifted from the very important question above]

    When faced with trials, we realized of our weakest moment and feel the urgent need for strengths. Strengths to continue in the struggle. Hence why human beings; believers or non-believers seek the help of The Divine at that desperate time of need. Yet, we immediately forgot The Source of Help after we are saved from the trials. Allaah mentioned this too many times in the Qur`an.

    Thus why Allaah keep sending tests for us all our life to the point:

    “How wonderful is the affair of the believer, for his affairs are all good, and this applies to no one but the believer. If something good happens to him, he is thankful for it and that is good for him. If something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience and that is good for him.” (Narrated by Muslim, 2999).

    This excerpt from [Source] suits this thread:

    I might need to read what I myself wrote when I am in that state of being tested.

    :wasalam:
  18. mezeren
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    mezeren Junior Member

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  19. kashif_nazeer
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    kashif_nazeer ~~~Alhamdulillah~~~

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    :salam2:

    :jazaak: for this thread ukht,indeed trials are here to test us and make us stronger and firmer in our faith.

    I would like to share with you an incident which happened with me a few months back.A reminder for myself first,so that I may not forget how merciful Allah has been to me.
    I had given an exam and I was really hoping I would qualify since I had put in a lot of effort in it.Alhamdolillah I cleared the written.Then we had interview and I was making dua always ,that may Allah make me qualify it if it is in my benefit else keep it away from me,before making this dua I used to say "O Allah I ask you on the basis of all the good deeds I have done sincerely for your sake and on the basis of all bad deeds I have refrained for your sake alone sincerely and I ask you by all your names which you have revealed in your book or taught to any of your creation or kept hidden in the knowledge of unseen for Yourself .... then I made the dua."
    I didn't clear interview,although I was fourth in the waiting list.My father wasn't willing to register for waiting list as he thought I wouldnt make it,so I again said the dua that Allah,whatever is better for me I accept that.Suddenly my dad changed his mind out of nowhere.We went and registered.Then after result of waiting list was out,again I didnt make it.
    Then I was content that if it is the qadar of Allah then I will have to submit to it,since Allah knows what is best for me.Then as a few weeks passed by I had forgotten about this exam and taken admission elsewhere.
    One day in Ramadan,out of the blue I get this call,"Mr Kashif Nazeer,your waiting list is cleared,would you like to take admission?"I was stunned lol and I thought"What kind of question is that?Of course"
    and then Alhamdolillah Allah's Might and Power and His mercy were manifested upon me.

    So my advice to myself and to those who do not get anything they want is be content with the qadar of Allah and submit to it because if it is good for you Allah will surely give it to you,if not Allah will give you even better.
    :wasalam:
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  20. Seeking Allah's Mercy
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    Seeking Allah's Mercy Qul HuwaAllahu Ahud!

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    Asalamo`Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaatuh.

    The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

    “Strive to do that which will benefit you and seek the help of Allaah, and do not feel helpless.” Narrated by Muslim, 2664.

    And Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “You (Alone) we worship, and You (Alone) we ask for help (for each and everything)” [al-Faatihah 1:5].

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