You can be the Happiest Woman in the World...

Discussion in 'TurnToIslam Lounge !' started by Aisya al-Humaira, Apr 29, 2010.

  1. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    To every Muslim woman who is content with Allaah as her Lord, Islam as her religion and Muhammad (Blessings and Peace be upon him) as her Prophet.

    To every girl who follows the path of truth, who carried the message of sincerity.

    To every teacher who strives by means of her words to convey knowledge and values, and has purified her soul.

    To every mother who brings her children up to fear Allaah and to follow the Sunnah, and makes virtue dear to them.

    To every woman who is burdened with worried and sadness.

    Rejoice and receive the glad tidings of a way-out at hand, the care of Allaah, a great reward and expiation of sins.


    Yes!

    Yes to your beautiful smile that sends a message of warmth and friendliness to others.

    Yes to your kind words that establish friendship as permitted in Islam and dispel rancour.

    Yes to acceptable charity that brings happiness to the poor and feeds the hungry.

    Yes to sitting with the Qur'an, reciting it, pondering its meanings and acting upon them, and repenting and seeking forgiveness.

    Yes to remembering Allaah a great deal and praying for forgiveness, persisting in dua'a and offering sincere repentance.

    Yes to raising your children in Islam, teaching them the Sunnah and guiding them to that which will benefit them.

    Yes to modesty and hijaab as enjoined by Allaah, which is the means of self-protection.

    Yes to the friendship of good women who fear Allaah, love Islam and respect high values.

    Yes to honouring one's parents, upholding the ties of kinship, honouring one's neighbours and caring for orphans.

    Yes to reading useful, interesting and beneficial books.


    No!

    No to wasting time in trivial pursuits, and love of revenge and futile arguments.

    No to giving priority to money and accumulation of wealth over one's health, happiness, sleep and peace of mind.

    No to seeking out other people's faults and backbitting about them, whilst forgetting one's own faults.

    No to indulging in physical pleasure and giving in to every whim and desire.

    No to wasting time with shallow people and spending hours in idle pursuits.

    No to neglecting physical hygiene and cleanliness in the house, and being disorganized at home.

    No to haraam drinks, cigarettes, narghile ("hookah pipes"), and all foul things.

    No to thinking of past calamities and dwelling on past mistakes.

    No to forgetting the Hereafter and neglecting to strive for it, and to being careless of what will happen in the Hereafter.

    No to wasting money on haraam things, being extravagant with regard to permissible things, and falling short in acts of worship.



    1. A Woman who challenged tyranny

    "And Allaah has set forth an example for those who believe: the wife of Fir'awn (Pharoah), when she said: "My Lord! Build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from the people who are Zalimun (polytheists, wrongdoers and disbelievers in Allaah)." 66:11

    Think about how Allaah made this woman - Asiyah, may Allaah be pleased with her - a living example for believing men and women, a clear symbol for everyone who wants to be guided and follow the ways of Allaah in life. How wise this woman was, when she sought a home with the Lord and put that above her worldly interests. She freed herself from the control of the kaafir (disbeliever) tyrant Pharoah and refused to live in this palace with his servants and courtiers, and with all its luxuries. She sought a better home that was more lasting and more beautiful, with the Lord of the Worlds, amidst gardens and rivers, in a seat of truth (i.e Paradise), near the Omnipotent King (Allaah, the One, the All-Blessed, the Most High, the Owner of Majesty and Honour) (54:55).


    2. You have a huge wealth of blessings

    My sister, verily with every difficulty there is ease (94:6); after night comes the day. The clouds of worry will be blown away, the darkness of distress will be dispelled, and calamities will come to an end, by Allaah's leave. Remember that you will be rewarded, and if you are a mother, your children will be a great support and help for Islam, if you bring them up properly. They will make dua'a for you when they prostrate and at the end of the night, just before dawn. It is a great blessing if you are a comppasionate and a kind mother. It is sufficient honour and pride for you to remember that the mother of Muhammad (Blessings and Peace be upon him) gave mankind a great leader, the noble Messenger.

    You have the potential to be a da'iyah (caller to Islam) calling other women to the path of Allaah with kind words, good exhortation and wisdom, arguing in a manner that is better, debating and guiding others by means of your good behaviour and setting an example. A woman may achieve, by means of her conduct and righteous deeds, things that cannot be achieved by means of khutbahs (religious sermons), lectures and lessons. How often has a woman gone to live in a neighbourhood, and people started to talk about her religious commitment, modesty, hijaab and good attitude, her kindness to her neighbours and her obedience to her husband, so she became a good example to others, that was spoken of by all.


    3. The believing woman and the disbelieveing woman are not equal

    You can be happy if you examine just one issue - the situation of the Muslim woman in the Muslim lands and the situation of the disbelieving woman in the land of disbelief.

    The Muslim woman in the Muslim land is a believing woman who gives charity, fasts, prays qiyaam al-Layl, observes hijaab, obeys her husband, fears her Lord, is kind to her neighbours and is compassionate towards her children. So she is to be congratulated for her great reward, tranquility and contenment.

    The disbelieving woman in the lands of disbelief is a woman who makes a wanton display of herself, she is ignorant and foolish, a mere fashion model, a cheap and worthless product on offer in all places. She has no value, honour or religion.

    Compare the two situations and you will see that you are the happiest, the most well off.

    "So do not become weak (against your enemy), nor be sad, and you will be superior (in victory) if you are indeed (true) believers." (3:139)


    4. You are better off than millions of women

    Think of the world as a whole, of the hospitals filled with patients who have been stricken with disease and calamity for many years, and the prisons in which thousands of people are held behind bars, their lives and pleasures ruined, and the asylums and hospitals which accommodate people who have lost their minds and have become insane.

    Are there not poor people living in tattered tents and havels, who cannot find a bite to eat? Are there not women who have been stricken with calamities that took away all their children in a single accident? Or women who have lost their sight or hearing, or whose arms or legs have been amputated, or who have lost their minds, or who have been stricken with chronic diseases?

    But you are sound in body and in good health, living a life of tranquility, security and contenment. So give thanks to Allaah, the Exalted, All-Merciful, for His Blessings and do not waste your time with things that are not pleasing to Him, sitting for hours in front of satellite TV with its cheap, nasty and follish content that makes the heart sick and causes depression, and makes the body lethargic.


    5. Build yourself a palace in Paradise

    Look how many generations have passed away. Did they take their wealth with them? Did they take their palaces and their high status? Were they buried with their gold and silver? Did they take their cars and planes with them to the Hereafter? No! They were stripped even of their clothing and placed in their graves in their shrouds. So prepare yourself for that day; do not grieve or despair about any worldly comforts, for they are cheap and transient. Nothing will abide except righteous deeds. Allaah, the Exalted says:

    "Whoever works righteousness - whether male or female - while he/she is a true believer (of Islamic monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contenment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (Paradise in the Hereafter)." (16:97)


    ...more to come. Stay tuned :)

    P/S : I didnt post it in the sisters' club because I thought that the men can also benefits from this thread. InshaAllaah. Can share it with their mothers, sisters or spouses.

    Source/Book title: "You can be the Happiest Woman in the World : A treasure Chest of Reminders" by Dr A'id al-Qarni
  2. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam walaikum,

    The joy that is in my heart is only from Allah subhana talla. And that joy shines outwards like the sunshine..and how strong are Muslim women.
  3. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    :)

    Alhamdulillah. Have just finished my exams today. So spending some time in the libraries of TTI.
  4. Aisha. joyo
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    Aisha. joyo ~ALLAH 0 AKBAR~

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    Manshallah jazakala khayera sis for sharing with us manshallah And that is so true.;)
  5. sis khadidja
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    sis khadidja proud to be muslim

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    :salam2: thanks for sharing this sis its just opend my eyes about women in islam ! :hearts:
  6. IslamIsLight
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    IslamIsLight Islam is my life Staff Member

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    salam aleikum
    I'm just reading this book and it has many beautiful advices .I recommend it to every sister .Its a book by Aid al Qarni ...
    jazakiAllah khair ukhti for posting this.

    waaleikum salam
  7. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    6. A little that makes you happy is better than a lot that makes you miserable

    The part of your life that really counts is that in which you are happy and contented. As for greed and panic, they do not count at all. They are bad for your health and rob you of your beauty. Remain content with Allaah and with what is decreed for you; believe in al-qadar (the divine decree) and be optimistic about the future.

    Be like a butterfly, which is light-hearted and beautiful, not attached to mere things; it flies from flower to flower, from hill to hill, from garden to garden.

    Or be like a bee, which eats good things and produces good things; when it lands on a branch or flower, it does not break it; it takes the nectar and does not sting, and produces honey, buzzes with love and glad tidings, reflecting a sense of contenment, as if it is heavenly creature that has come down to earth.


    7. Look at the clouds and not at the ground

    Be ambitious, keep climbing and always have hope. Beware of falling, and remember that life is minutes and seconds. Be like the ant in hard work, patience and perseverance. Always keep trying and keep repenting. If you go back to sin, then repent again. Memorize Qur'an, and if you forget it, go back and memorize it again and again. The main thing is that you should never feel defeated or frustated, because rationally speaking there is no such thing as the last word or the bitter end, rather there is always trial and error, and learning from your mistakes.

    Life is like a body that may undergo consmetic surgery; it is like a building that can be renovated and rebuilt from scratch, with new decor and paint. Do away with all thoughts of failure, and stop thinking of calamities and problems, for Allaah, the Al-Mighty says:

    "...and put your trust in Allaah if you are indeed believers." (5:23)


    8. Living in a hut with faith is better than living in a palace with disbelief

    A Muslim woman living in a hut, worshipping her Lord, offering her five daily prayers and fasting Ramadhan, is happier than a woman who lives in a lofty palace with servants and all means of luxuries. A believing woman living in a tent and eating barley bread and drinking water from an earthenware jar, who has her Mushaf and masbahah (Muslim rosary) with her, is better off than a woman who lives in an ivory tower in rooms furnished with velvet, but who does not know her Lord or follow her Prophet.

    You should understand the true meaning of happiness: it is not the narrow and distorted meaning that many people imagine. Do you think that happiness is to be found in dollars and dinars, furnishings and clothing, food and drink, means of transportation? Not at all.

    Happiness is contenment in the heart, peace of mind, a sense of stability, joy in the heart, a righteous attitude, good behaviour and being content with what is sufficient.


    9. Organize your time so that you can do all you have to do

    Try reading a good book or listening to a useful tape. Listen to a beautiful recitation of the Book of Allaah - perhaps a single verse will penetrate deeply in your heart and stir your conscience, bringing guidance and light, and dispelling doubts and despair. Read the books of Sunnah and the words of the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) in Riyad as-Saliheen. You will find the correct remedy and beneficial knowledge which will protect you from slipping or making mistakes, and will solve all your problems.

    Your medicine is in the Revelation - the Qur'an and Sunnah, your comfort is in faith, your delight in prayer, your peace of mind in contenment, the beauty of your faace in smiling, the protection of your honour in hijaab, and your tranquility in dhikir (remembrance of Allaah, the All-Merciful).


    10. Our happiness is not like theirs

    Who told you that distracting music, immoral songs, cheap soap operas, reprehensible plays, offensive magazines and dubious movies bring happiness and joy? Whoever told you that, is lying! These are things that lead to misery, depression and distress, as acknowledged by those who have worked in those fields and then repented. So flee from this miserable life of idlers who deviate from the straight path of Allaah, and come to recitation of the Qur'an with humility, useful books, moving lessons, stirring khutbahs (sermons), true friendship and sincere repentance. Come to spiritual gatherings and remembrance of Allaah; may He accept your repentance and fill your heart with tranquility and peace.


    11. Climb aboard the ship of salvation

    I have read the stories of dozens of actors, singers and others who were involoved in idle pursuits, both living and dead, and I said: What a shame! Where are the Muslim men and women, the believeing men and women, the sincere men and women, the men and women who fast, the mean and women who worship Allaah, the Exalted, the men and women who are humble and devout?

    Can this short life be wasted on idle matters and trivial pursuits? Do you have another life besides this one? Do you have a promise from Allaah that you will never die? No, by Allaah. These are just false illusions and wishful thinking.

    Take a stock of yourself, then draw up a new plan; strive hard to catch up and climb aboard the ship of salvation.


    12. A great deal of provision comes with seeking forgiveness

    A woman said: "My husband died when I was in my thirties, and I have five children, boys and girls, from him. My world turned dark around me, and I wept until I feared I would lose my sight. I complained about my bad luck and fell into despair and depression. My children were small, and our income was not sufficient. I was spending carefully from the little money that our father had left to us. One day in my room, I turned on the radio and tuned into the Holy Qur'an radio station. I heard a Shaykh saying: "The Messenger of Allaah (Blessings and Peace be upon him) said: 'Whoever prays to Allaah a great deal for forgiveness, Allaah will grant him relief from every distress and a way out from every hardship.' " So after that I began to pray a great deal for forgiveness and I told my children to do likewise.

    Only six months later, the developers came, bought some old property of ours, and paid us millions for it. My son became the first student in his region to memorize the entire Qur'an, and he became a focus of people's care. Our house was filled with blessings and we attained the best standard of living. Allaah has kept all my sons and daughters safe and sound, and has taken away my worry, grief and depression. I have become the happiest woman."
  8. Aapa
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    Aapa Mirajmom

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    Assalaam waliakum,

    May Allah reward you for this post. I have just been given an answer. As I have been fired recently ..my mind has been cluttered with how do I put food on the table for my sons.

    Insha"Allah, Allah, will hear my plea.


    my love,

    your aapa
  9. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    Ameen to your dua'a.

    I won't stop making dua'a too. For all my beloved sisters in TTI.

    Take care :)
  10. Aisha hussain..
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    Aisha hussain.. seeking knowledge

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    salam alaykum

    thank you sister it was sooo beautifull mashallah ♥ :)
  11. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    13. Enter the garden of knowledge

    One of the means of finding happiness is understanding Islam, for learning about Islam brings contentment and please the Lord. As the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) said: "When Allaah intends good for a person, He grants him understanding of religion."

    So read easily-available books of knowledge and understanding of Islam, such as Riyaad as-Saliheen, Fiqh as-Sunnah, Fiqh ad-Dalil, easy Tafsirs (Interpretations) and useful essays. Remember that the best of your deeds is to know what Allaah meant in His Book and what the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) meant in his Sunnah, so study the Qur'an a great deal with your sisters, memorize whatever you can of it, listen to and act upon it, because ignorance of Islam leads to darkness and anxiety in the heart.

    You should have a home library, even if it is small, containing useful books and tapes. Beware of wasting time listening to songs and watching soap operas, for you will be called to account for every second of your life, so make the most of your time to please Allaah, the Exalted, All-Mighty.


    14. Remember the shed tears and broken hearts

    One of the literati said:

    If you believe that you have a covenant with time such that things will only be the way you want in all your affairs, and you will only be given what you want and desire, then it makes sense to give yourself free rein to grieve every time you do not get what you want or when obstacles come between you and your goal.

    But if you are aware that things alternate, sometimes you get what you want and sometimes you miss out, and that life never gives you a gift and then forgets about it, rather it will come back to take it back, and that this is the way life is for all the sons of Adam, whether they live in palaces or hovels, for the one whose limit is the sky and the one who sleeps on the bare ground.

    So try to calm your grief and wipe away your tears, for you are not the only one stricken with calamities and your problems are nothing new or unjust in the annals of calamity and grief.


    15. The way to Allaah is the best way

    What is happiness? Is happiness to be found in money or status or lineage? There are many answers, but let us look at the happiness of this woman:

    A man had an argument with his wife and said, "I'm going to make your life miserable." The wife calmly replied, "You cannot do that." He said, "Why not?" She said: "If happiness were to be found in money or jewellery, you could deprive me of it and take it away from me, but it is nothing over which you or any other person has any control. I find my happiness in my faith, and my faith is in my heart, and no one has any power over it except my Lord."

    This is true happiness, the happiness of faith, and no one can feel this happiness except the one whose mind, heart and soul are filled with the love of Allaah. The one who truly has control over happiness is the One true God, so seek happiness from Him by worshipping and obeying Him.

    The only way to find happiness is by learning the true religion with which the Messenger of Allaah (Blessings and peace be upon him) was sent. Once a person finds this way, it will not matter if he sleeps in a hut or by the side of the road, and he will be content with a piece of bread, and he will be the happiest person in the world. But whoever goes astray from this path will find that his whole life is filled with grief, his wealth is deprivation, his efforts are loss and his end will be humiliation.


    16. You do not have time for idle talk

    Avoid arguments and getting involved in futile discussions about things that may never happen, because that causes anxiety and annoyance. Do not always try to convince people about matters that are open to different points of view, rather, simply state your view quietly without getting angry or trying to pressurize others.

    Avoid refuting or criticizing others too much, for that will make you feel uneasy and give others the wrong impression about you. Say what you have to say in a kind and gentle manner, then you will be able to win people over and inspire them. Moreover, worry and distress lead to backbitting about others and putting them down, which takes away reward, brings you a burden of sin and destroy tranquility. So, pay attention to correcting your own faults and forget about people's faults, for Allaah did not create us perfect and infallible; rather, we all have sins and faults. So, glad tidings are to the one who focuses on dealing with his won faults rather than the faults of others.



    17. When things become unbearable, turn to Allaah

    Ibn al-Jawzi said:

    "Something was causing me a great deal of grief and distress, and I started to think long and hard about how to get out of this situation by any means, but could not find any way out. Then I came across this verse:

    "...And whosoever fears Allaah and keep his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out (of every difficulty)." (65:2)

    I realized that taqwa (piety, fearing Allaah) is the way out of every kind of grief and distress. As soon as I followed the path of taqwa, I found the way out."

    I say: for the wise men, taqwa is the way that leads to everything good, for calamity happens only as the result of sin, and it can only be lifted through repentance. Sadness, grief and worry are punishments for sins that you have commited, by falling short in your prayers, or backbitting about a Muslimah, or taking the matter of hijaab lightly, or commiting a haraam (forbidden) action. Whoever goes against the laws of Allaah, the All-Mighty, has to pay the price for that shortcoming. The One Who created happiness is the Most Gracious, Most Merciful, so how can you seek happiness from anyone other than Him? If people had control over happiness, there would be no deprived or grieving person left on earth.


    18. Women are like stars in the sky

    The righteous Muslim woman is the one who treats her husband kindly and obeys him after obeying her Lord. The Messenger of Allaah (Blessings and Peace be upon him) praised such women and regarded them as the ideal wives that men should look for. When the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) was asked which woman is the best, he said: "The one who makes him (her husband) happy when he looks at her, who obeys him when he tells her to do something, and who does not oppose him in a manner that he dislikes with regard to herself or his wealth."

    When Allaah, the Exalted , revealed the words:

    "...And those who hoard up gold and silver (al-Kanz: the money, the Zakah of which has not been paid)..." (9:34)

    'Umar went out and Thawban (may Allaah be pleased with them) followed him. 'Umar came to the Prophet (Blessings and Peace be upon him) and said: "O Prophet of Allaah, this verse has made your Companions worried." The Prophet said: "Shall I not tell you of something that is a man's treasure? A righteous woman who pleases him when he looks at her, when he tells her to do something, she obeys him, and of he is away from her, she is faithful."

    The Messenger of Allaah (Blessings and Peace be upon him) stated that a woman's admission to Paradise depends on whether her husband is pleased with her. It was narrated that Umm Salamah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: "The Messenger of Allaah said: 'Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise.' " So be such woman and you will be happy. :)
  12. Aisya al-Humaira
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    Aisya al-Humaira الحمدلله على كل حال

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    Assalamu'alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,

    *Bumping up this thread for the benefit of others, Inshaa Allaah*

    I have the feelings some of us here need to read/re-read this thread.

    Sadly to say, the hard copy of this book which I referred to when typing it out [I didn't just copy and paste it] . . .got lost. Along with some other precious books and my beloved Qu'ran. It has been a while, so I guess until I buy a new book, I'm unable to proceed with this thread.

    Was-salaam.
  13. Hajjerr
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    Hajjerr He is Dhul-Jalali Wal-Ikram

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    salam aleikum wa rahmatulahy wa barakatuh

    thank you so much dear sister, i benefit from these beautifull words and advices, alhamdullilah

    what good definition of happyness, we need to be reminded of what really brings comfort when this world distract us and is making us sllip in the wrong ways...

    :salam2:
  14. Sister Zohra
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    Sister Zohra Junior Member

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    Assalamu Alaikum,

    Thank you for "bumping" this thread sister. I didn't read this before and I did benefit from it. May Allah reward you.
  15. all4islam
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    all4islam Junior Member

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    Assalam-e-alikum

    Jazakallah khair sister for sharing it with us i learn from it.it is really benefical
    Mashallah :)
    May Allah bless you
  16. kalamazoo
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    kalamazoo 'Millat "IBRAHIM" {AleyhiSalaam}

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    asalaam aleykum,

    walaw stated for sister as mother as grands
    but i could not control myself at least should say...

    .Shukrran...
  17. strive-may-i
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    strive-may-i Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    Here is something related and aptly said!


  18. sabina isa
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    sabina isa Junior Member

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    :salam2:

    Jazak Allahu khair for the beautiful post. Was long time I haven't read such a long and good advice. But was such a inspiration and feels true the quote of strive-may-I. It is indeed that good muslimahs cause good state of faith more than man, because of the these very words said there. It makes us more responsible toward the amanah with Allah swt.

    We salam
  19. finding light
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    finding light Ya Rab! Forgive me..

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    Salaam,

    JazakAllah Khair for this.. very inspiring and what an effort you made to post this Sister. Allah reward you.
    Im gonna copy paste :)
  20. xAllahKnowsBestx
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    xAllahKnowsBestx Junior Member

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    *Bump* :D

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