A logical believer
Salam brothers and sisters,

How have you been brothers and sisters?

I hope everything is good. I have completed first year in aerospace engineering with everyones dua. I scored A's and they were o.k.

Anyway I have something to say about my actions during the past year on spamming on TTI about my aspiration.

Salam brothers and sisters,

I don't know if I'm being a troll or a spammer, but i really want to know. Am i normal? The reason I ask that is because my aspiration is so confusing

You see its just that im really intriuiged by it. My intuition for it is different from a normal curious person. Like i liked the Unknown since childhood (as far as I can remember). Also I don't know if I had these dreams before when i was a child, but like a year or 2 years ago I had some wierd feelings and I had dreams, which I cannot remember, i remember one was concerning Jinns, and well some quran ayats also lightened and enforced my aspiration to know the reason and the purpose. truely don't know if this aspiration is about unknown as in creation (i.e. universe, jinns, Alif Laam Meem) or if it unknown/unseen that is beyond like the ghayb or absolute like the keys to the ghayb or maybe something else. Whenever I pray or before I go to sleep I always ask Allah for Guidance, I ask him to show me and understand my dream and if its from shaitain destroy the dreams and I ask to understand it, if its just unknown or the ghayb (beyond). Im also interested in the keys to the universe...but yeah..The only reason I asked here on TTI is because i want understand it and its purpose its so hard to explain and really mind consuming

Also recently i had a dream but also i had a random thought of me as a aerospace engineering being sent to Saturn. Apparently there as an unknown body (a rogue planet) made out of something and no physics even M-theory and stuff could explain in, and that effected Saturn so pretty much you can stand on a gas planet. Anyway I used a mass driver (kinda like a accelerator) to boost me onto the rouge planet. I then went inside the planet and saw some unknown tunnels and stuff written on the walls. The energy of the planet and temperature was really weird, like it got hotter as i go deeper but it fluctuated. It felt comfortable, then i had a weird feeling in my dream and in my thought and i found some piece of what looks like a metal and then i hear/feel something and i run back to my ship and come back to earth

Brothers and sisters, I'm not an amazing Muslim i have committed sins but idk what this dreams are and what my aspiration me find out..i pray to Allah that I find my answers and I don't know if its the unknown or the ghayb. Also to my understanding apparently the ghayb is the unseen knowledge/power/or whatever it is/beyond..then shouldn't it be also considered the unknown..See thats whats confusing me, too..please help..i hope I'm not weird

Remember that? :shake:

And after a couple of months, my comprehesion came to this state:

I feel like maybe my aspiration is meant for me to go and find the unknown that is the physical laws and the beyond i'll leave it

Anyway after couple of months in university. I have not had the same intuition or feeling towards the unknown. I feel like i was wasting my time. but if this whole thing is just a mind game i played myself. What does that leave me to be. I have nothing to offer, not special at all..idk i don't wanna be a minority. The only thing I have left is the urge to get a job and get a good family, but that doesn't make life interesting. Idk, maybe i should focus on helping humanity as an engineer or something, but i don't wanna be the other guy. I thought each of us are unique, what ever happened to being unique.....


And for some reason, I don't want to let this go, I actually find the unknown intriguing..

so what should i do brothers and sisters?