Men can shake hands with women.

Al-Kashmiri

Well-Known Member
Staff member
You're complicating matters yourself. If you need to to give money to a woman behind the till then give it, but at least have the intention to avoid touching her. Simple.

And actually, you can just say that. I've done it many times and to date, no one has minded. One woman (a executive manager) in fact retracted her hand, apologising to me before I even 'done' anything. She later told me that she is Jewish and that the practice (of not shaking hands between genders) is apart of their customs too. Of course, you have to use hikmah and be nice about it not to cause upset.

As for the hadeeth of the Prophet (sall-Allaahu `alayhi wasallam) then you're applying your own principles to derive your own rulings from it. I really doubt you have any right to ijtihâd to do as such, so you should be heedful and refrain from passing your personal opinions. Secondly, there's a hadeeth in which the Prophet (sall-Allahu `alayhi wasallam) says that it is better that a iron nail be driven through our foreheads than that we touch a non-mahram. That's crystal clear.

You're argument is totally weak. In France (and other places), it is common practice for a man and woman, when they meet to kiss each other on the cheek, despite them being non-mahram to one another. By applying your argument, you are saying that we should this to so as not to be disrespectful!?

Like I said at the start, there's a difference between an unintentional accident and having a deliberate intent to shake hands/touch a woman when dealing with her etc.

Lastly, read Um Ahmad's comment again, she didn't quite say that.
 

saifkhan

abd-Allah
salam alaikum warahamtu-llah


I don't know why we have to search any GAP in Islamic rulings.
Like a business man, searching for a parallel or 2nd way to trade so that he can avoid TAX.

may Allah save us from this type of fitna.

wassalam
 

mahussain3

Son of Aa'ishah(R.A)
your alowed to shake hands with ppl that dont know about islam n its rules. if a non muslim sticks out there hand for me to shake it, it would be rude to not. and they might
think islam is like a rude relgion. plus with the lowering of the gaze. what if im at a supermarket and the person at the till is a women. i would look lik an idiot trying to give her money and not look at her. how am i suppose to see where she is. there are certain times where your aloud to do stuff. and no where in the Quran does it say its haram to look at girls or touch a women. its bad, lik saying a bad word but not haram. but to us whatever Allah recommends or anything the Prophet did we should do no matter what. and the thing with selling alcohol and prok ya thats haram. i think its all about ur intentions, if you know the person is muslim, then you shouldnt have to shake their hand.

“It is not for a believer, man or woman, when Allaah and His Messenger have decreed a matter that they should have any option in their decision. And whoever disobeys Allaah and His Messenger, he has indeed strayed into a plain error”
[al-Ahzaab 33:36]


“The only saying of the faithful believers, when they are called to Allaah (His Words, the Qur’aan) and His Messenger, to judge between them, is that they say: ‘We hear and we obey.’ And such are the successful (who will live forever in Paradise)”
[al-Noor 24:51]
 

faaraa

Nothing but Muslimah
also, the Prophet (pbuh) taught us to be respectful to ppl who respect you, if u dont shake the hand of a person, the person is going to think "who does he think he is, does he think im dirty" to them its disrespectful.

Let me tel you, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE IF YOUR IMAAN IS STRONG !!!

Ok, if you care so much for the others...let me remind you that any one who is having a brain to think, would never say that "who does he think he is, does he think im dirty"

You know what? When I was schooling, I used to score the highest marks on a particular subject.. ALAHMDULILAH and as I was continuing to score the highest, my teacher wanted to wish me and in a gathering of more than 90 students, (Both girls and boys) he gifted me some thing and gave me his hand to shake...

IMAGINE... HE WAS MY TEACHER, WHOM I RESPECT A LOT.. You know what I did??

I said Sir I am sorry I am a Muslimah and we are not permitted to this.. I respect you sir, But I respect ALLLAH's orders more than every thing..

He was SUBHANALLAH convinced and said that he will never do the same to my juniors here after.. SIMPLE........... I am not boasting BUT telling you a way to convince others...

In this world, the Buddhist Monks dont even sit near their own women,

Some hindus dont even look at a girl after completing one of their pilgrimages..,

And most of the christian nuns.. they never reply the men...

DO PEOPLE THINK THAT "who do they think they are, do they think im dirty"

DO THEY THINK??? NO, RIGHT?

AT LEAST DO WE MUSLIMS THINK THAT WAY ???? NO, RIGHT??
?

So why do you think that people will have a bad image on you????? THATS YOUR PERCEPTION ... not the reality

Let me repeat, I am not here to hurt any one.. but let us discuss..:)

May ALLAH AZZAWAJAL show all of the straight path..

FEE AMANILLAH
 

saifkhan

abd-Allah
salamalaikum warahamtu-llah

there is a true and short story.
once a Muslim guy was praying in the underground metro/train station, somewhere in the Europe, may be in UK. it was the time and he couldn't wait, so he said his salah there.
there was a girl/lady, non-Muslimah was observing him and she was also waiting for the next metro/train to come, coz she never saw the most beautiful form of worship, and she didn't know anything about Islam.

so, when he was finished, the girl approached him and asked for what he was doing. then He replied her that he was praying to Allah and the time was running out, so I had to have it here finished.
she was amazed and she said, that she had never heard anything about this, anyways, she extended her hand to shake and the Muslim guy refused to shake his hand and explained that we are not allowed to touch...........

subhan Allah

after that the girl turned to Islam, became a devoted one and at the same station she met again the Muslim guy and she proposed him to marry her, and they got married and now insha Allah I hope one of the most happiest couple in the world.

may Allah bless them
may Allah bless the Ummah

wassalamu alaikum
 

Al-Kashmiri

Well-Known Member
Staff member
As-salaamu `alaykum

A nice story indeed, though it sounds a bit like a fairy-tale. If it's true, mind telling us your source?
 

Ibn Uthaymin

Junior member
Bro Saif, i wanna know the source of that too. My friends have seen quite the contrary. One brother started praying salah in one of the buses in London, and one non Muslim lady was observing and she burst into tears out of fear!

They hate us on an unprecedented level
 

108EEDMAH

Junior Member
abu talid "''no where does it say that the Prophet told us not to shake the hand of non mahram girl'' Wow the Prophet Sallahu Alayhi Sallam didn't say me to offer Fajr Sunnah so shouldn't I do that???"

what if i dont pray the fajr sunnah?? am i going to hell??? no. its not something i have to do, but i should do. (im not trying to say dont pray sunnah) becz i want to be with the Prophet in paradise, n to get that i have to be just like him (try)

i agree with you guys that we shouldnt shake hands and that we should tell others y. but i dont think its haram.

the france argument, stopped me in my tracks tho. nice reply

im thinking it over, maybe it is haram based on the fact that it could lead to other stuff. but the thing is its like a 5sec thing. i dont know
 

ShahnazZ

Striving2BeAStranger
abu talid "''no where does it say that the Prophet told us not to shake the hand of non mahram girl'' Wow the Prophet Sallahu Alayhi Sallam didn't say me to offer Fajr Sunnah so shouldn't I do that???"

what if i dont pray the fajr sunnah?? am i going to hell??? no. its not something i have to do, but i should do. (im not trying to say dont pray sunnah) becz i want to be with the Prophet in paradise, n to get that i have to be just like him (try)

This is a joke right? You're kidding me. I'm in shock that there are Muslims who think like this. Yes there are those that do not pray but to say it's not haram????!! Okay, here you go. Please vocalize as to whether you feel kufr is worth it or not. And yes, those who give up prayer ARE going to hell.

Her husband does not do any of his duties, he sleeps a lot and he neglect prayers

Praise be to Allaah.
We ask Allaah to help you and give you strength, and to guide your husband aright.

Undoubtedly by taking care of your children and being keen to guide your husband, you are doing good and will be rewarded in sha Allaah, for Allaah does not cause the reward of those who do good to be lost.

Our advice to you is to keep on being patient and making du’aa’ for your husband, and striving to guide him, through his parents, his brothers and those who have any influence on him. If a man neglects his duty towards his family he exposes himself to the wrath and anger of Allaah, because he is neglecting that which Allaah has entrusted to his care. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The ruler is the shepherd of his people and is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of his family and is responsible for his flock….” This hadeeth was narrated by al-Bukhaari, 893; Muslim, 1826, from Ibn ‘Umar. And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said of his household: “Allaah will ask every shepherd about that which was entrusted to his care, whether he took care of it or neglected it, and He will even ask a man about his family.” Narrated by Ibn Hibbaan, classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Ghaayat al-Maraam, no. 271

And he said: “It is sufficient sin for a man to neglect those who are under his care.” Narrated by Ahmad and Abu Dawood from the hadeeth of ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 827.

And he said: “There is no man whom Allaah causes to be appointed to a position of responsibility and he does not discharge his duties sincerely, but he will not even smell the fragrance of Paradise.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 6731.

We do not think that your husband would like to have this warning directed at him, or that he would want his wife to spend on him and take care of him. This is something that men instinctively dislike.

You said that he sleeps and misses the prayers because he stays up at night and wastes his time. This means that he is in grave danger from another angle. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Then, there has succeeded them a posterity who have given up As‑Salah (the prayers) [i.e. made their Salah (prayers) to be lost, either by not offering them or by not offering them perfectly or by not offering them in their proper fixed times] and have followed lusts. So they will be thrown in Hell”

[Maryam 19:59]

Ibn Mas’ood said that al-Ghayy (translated here as “Hell”) is a valley in Hell that is very deep and has an awful taste.

And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“. So woe unto those performers of Salaah (prayers),

5. Those who delay their Salaah (prayer from their stated fixed times)”

[al-Maa’oon 107:4-5]

This refers to those who delay their prayers from the proper times. But if he does not pray at all, then this is kufr which puts him beyond the pale of Islam, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Between a man and shirk and kufr there stands his giving up prayer.” Narrated by Muslim, 82.

And he said: “The covenant that stands between us and them is prayer. Whoever gives it up is a kaafir.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 2621; al-Nasaa’i, 463; Ibn Maajah, 1079; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani.


In that case you have to advise him, and if he persists in not praying, then you have to prevent him from being intimate with you until he repents and starts to pray.

We ask Allaah to set the affairs of all the Muslims traight.

And Allaah knows best.


Islam Q&A


So it's not haram, but in exchange you get shirk, Hell, and kufr. Totally worth it, I understand.

Honestly, I have no idea why people feel they can "pick and choose" from Islam.

If you believe in Allah as your Lord and Muhammad as His Rasul, there is no room for your OPINION.
 

Kakorot

Junior Member
salamalaikum warahamtu-llah

there is a true and short story.
once a Muslim guy was praying in the underground metro/train station, somewhere in the Europe, may be in UK. it was the time and he couldn't wait, so he said his salah there.
there was a girl/lady, non-Muslimah was observing him and she was also waiting for the next metro/train to come, coz she never saw the most beautiful form of worship, and she didn't know anything about Islam.

so, when he was finished, the girl approached him and asked for what he was doing. then He replied her that he was praying to Allah and the time was running out, so I had to have it here finished.
she was amazed and she said, that she had never heard anything about this, anyways, she extended her hand to shake and the Muslim guy refused to shake his hand and explained that we are not allowed to touch...........

subhan Allah

after that the girl turned to Islam, became a devoted one and at the same station she met again the Muslim guy and she proposed him to marry her, and they got married and now insha Allah I hope one of the most happiest couple in the world.

may Allah bless them
may Allah bless the Ummah

wassalamu alaikum

:wasalam:

I heard something like this years ago. It's like an islamic version of a fairy-tale.

Stories like this don't have a source because people make them up just to prove a point.
 

saifkhan

abd-Allah
salam alaikum

it is a true story, as far i know, and I heard from someone, who was in Europe for Tableegh Jamah I dont for how many days, and he came to know when he was in the tour, from a mosque in that region, I guess that was England/UK.

may be I shouldn't have shared it with you, because I don't know the source perfectly, and I should't have pass it until i come to know the perfect source

i do apologize for that

JazakAllah khair
wassalam
 

108EEDMAH

Junior Member
sunna of the fajr brother not fajr. u think im crazy of course its haram not to pray. were talking about the extra prayers
=)
 

ShahnazZ

Striving2BeAStranger
A. I'm not a brother.

B. Regarding shaking hands with a non-mahram woman:

Praise be to Allaah.
Firstly:

It is not permissible for a man who believes in Allaah and His Messenger to put his hand in the hand of a women who is not permissible for him or who is not one of his mahrams. Whoever does that has wronged himself (i.e., sinned).

It was narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yassaar said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “For one of you to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle is better for him than that he should touch a woman who is not permissible for him.”

Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer, 486. Shaykh al-Albaani said in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045, that this hadeeth is saheeh.

This hadeeth alone is sufficient to deter and to instill the obedience required of us by Allaah, because it implies that touching women may lead to temptation and immorality.

It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “When the believing women migrated to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), they would be tested in accordance with the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning):

‘O Prophet! When believing women come to you to give you the Bay‘ah (pledge), that they will not associate anything in worship with Allaah, that they will not steal, that they will not commit illegal sexual intercourse’

[al-Mumtahanah 60:12]

‘Aa’ishah said: Whoever among the believing women agreed to that had passed the test, and when the women agreed to that, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to them: “Go, for you have given your oath of allegiance.’ No, by Allaah, the hand of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never touched the hand of any woman, rather they would give their oath of allegiance with words only.” And ‘Aa’ishah said: “By Allaah, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) only took the oath of allegiance from the women in the manner prescribed by Allaah, and the hand of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never touched the hand of any woman. When he had taken their oath of allegiance he would say, ‘I have accepted your oath of allegiance verbally.’”

(narrated by Muslim, 1866)

It was narrated from ‘Urwah that ‘Aa’ishah told him about the women’s oath of allegiance: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never touched any woman with his hand. He would explain to the woman what the oath of allegiance implied, and when she accepted, he would say ‘Go, for you have given your oath of allegiance.’”

Narrated by Muslim, 1866

This infallible one, the best of mankind, the leader of the sons of Adam on the Day of Resurrection, did not touch women. This is despite the fact that the oath of allegiance was originally given by hand. So how about men other than the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)?

It was narrated that Umaymah the daughter of Raqeeqah said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “I do not shake hands with women.”

Narrated by al-Nasaa’i (4181) and Ibn Maajah, 2874; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 2513.

Secondly:

It is not permissible to shake hands even with a barrier in between, such as shaking hands from beneath a garment and the like. The hadeeth that was narrated allowing that is da’eef (weak).

It was narrated from Ma’qal ibn Yassaar that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to shake hands with women from beneath a garment.”

Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Awsat, 2855.

Al-Haythami said:

This was narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer and al-Awsat. Its isnaad includes ‘Ataab ibn Harb, who is da’eef (weak).

Majma’ al-Zawaa’id, 6/39.

Wali al-Deen al-‘Iraaqi said:

The words of ‘Aa’ishah, “He used to accept the women’s oath of allegiance by words only” mean that he did so without taking their hands or shaking hands with them. This indicates that the bay’ah of men was accepted by taking their hands and shaking hands with them, as well as by words, and this is how it was. What ‘Aa’ishah mentioned was the custom.

Some of the mufassireen mentioned that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) called for a vessel of water and dipped his hand in it, then the women dipped their hands in it. And some of them said that he did not shake hands with them from behind a barrier and had a Qatari cloak over his hand. And it was said that ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) shook hands with them on his behalf. None of these reports are sound, especially the last one, How could ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him) have done something that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), who was ma’soom (infallible), would not do?

Tarh al-Tathreeb, 7/45

Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

The most correct view is that this (i.e., shaking hands with women from behind a barrier) is not allowed at all, because of the general meaning of the hadeeth, according to which the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “I do not shake hands with women;” and so as to ward off the means that may lead to evil.

(Adapted from Hashiyat Majmoo’at Rasaa’il fi’l-Hijaab wa’l-Sufoor, p. 69)

The same ruling applies to shaking hands with old women; this is also haraam because of the general meaning of the texts on this issue. The reports that say it is permissible are da’eef (weak).

Al-Zayla’i said:

“As for the report that ‘Abu Bakr used to shake hands with old women, it is also ghareeb.”

(Nasab al-Raayah, 4/240)

Ibn Hajar said:

I cannot find this hadeeth.

(al-Diraayah fi Takhreej Ahaadeeth al-Hidaayah, 2/225)

Fourthly:

With regard to the views of the four imams, they are as follows:

1 – The Hanafi madhhab:

Ibn Nujaym said:

It is not permissible for a man to touch a woman’s face or hands even if there is no risk of desire because it is haraam in principle and there is no necessity that would allow it.

Al-Bahr al-Raa’iq, 8/219

2 – The Maaliki madhhab:

Muhammad ibn Ahmad (‘Ulaysh) said:

It is not permissible for a man to touch the face or hand of a non-mahram woman, and it is not permissible for him to put his hand on hers without a barrier. ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) never accepted a woman’s oath of allegiance by shaking hands with her; rather he (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to accept their oath of allegiance by words only.” According to another report, “His hand never touched the hand of a woman, rather he would accept their oath of allegiance by words only.”

(Manh al-Jaleel Sharh Mukhtasar Khaleel, 1/223)

3 – The Shaafa’i madhhab:

Al-Nawawi said:

It is not permissible to touch a woman in any way.

Al-Majmoo’, 4/515.

Wali al-Deen al-‘Iraaqi said:

This indicates that the hand of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did not touch the hand of any woman apart from his wives and concubines, whether in the case of accepting the oath of allegiance or in other cases. If he did not do that despite the fact that he was infallible and beyond suspicion, then it is even more essential that others heed this prohibition. It appears from the texts that he refrained from doing that because it was haraam for him to do so. The fuqaha’ among our companions and others said that it is haraam to touch a non-mahram woman even if that is not touching parts of her body that are not ‘awrah, such as her face. But they differed with regard to looking when there is no desire and no fear of fitnah. The prohibition on touching is stronger than the prohibition on looking, and it is haraam when there is no necessity that would allow it. If it is the case of necessity, e.g. medical treatment, removing a tooth or treating the eyes, etc., if there is no woman who can do that, then it is permissible for a non-mahram to do that because it is the case of necessity.

Tarh al-Tathreeb, 7/45, 46

4 – The Hanbali madhhab

Ibn Muflih said:

Abu ‘Abd-Allaah – i.e., Imam Ahmad – was asked about a man who shakes hands with a woman. He said, No, and was emphatic that it is haraam. I said, Should he shake hands with her from beneath his garment? He said, No.

Shaykh Taqiy al-Deen also favoured the view that it is prohibited, and gave the reason that touching is more serious than looking.

AlAdaab al-Shar’iyyah, 2/257

And Allaah knows best.

Islam Q&A


How do you like them apples?

Once again, if you believe in Allah as your Lord and Muhammad as His Rasul, there is no room for your OPINION.
 

108EEDMAH

Junior Member
sorry
my aplogiezzz

its not my opinion, its the way i see the hadith, opinion is diff than perspective. and these brothers and sisters have changed my perspective.

i think the main thing in this thread with all the diff views is
what the Prophet told us to do, and what the Prophet did but never told us to do.

For example, the Prophet told us to be kind to our wives. but he never told us not to touch a non-marham women. but he nevered.

everything the Prophet did or didnt do has some meaning behind it. and i guess i didnt really think about it this way.

and maybe the Prophet didnt touch a womens hand becz it could lead to other stuff which is haram, or maybe its for a diff reason we havnt found out yet.

so i change my argument to we shouldnt touch shake hands, and try are best to stay away from it, but if we do, i dont think were going to hell, but we might be taking a risk that could send us to hell, so in the end, the question is is it worth it???
 

108EEDMAH

Junior Member
It was narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yassaar said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “For one of you to be stabbed in the head with an iron needle is better for him than that he should touch a woman who is not permissible for him.”

Narrated by al-Tabaraani in al-Kabeer, 486. Shaykh al-Albaani said in Saheeh al-Jaami’, 5045, that this hadeeth is saheeh.

if this hadith is strong then, than i have no comment
 

Abu Talib

Feeling low
:salam2:

Ofcourse that hadith is authentic and strong . You didn't check the vids I posted here the Scholars mention it also.
 

fatma_said

Junior Member
:salam2:
May allah forgive you sister shahnazz your on the spot.

May allah increase you in knowledge and wisdom. As muslims we should always forbid what is wrong and enjoin what is right
 

justoneofmillion

Junior Member
Al Allama Albani advice to those who love to refute!

:salam2:May Allah swt benefit all of us with this .Am Appaled by some of the posts!who the heck are we to talk about someone like Sheikh Al Quaradawi!. Does anyone of you have his knowledge Of Quraan and hadeeth.He makes mistakes but it is kind of Biased to wanna mock him and never mock the Saudi based Ulama when they themselves make hilarious fatwas sometimes,I could post some here ,if you guys wanna go on some Fatwa shopping tourism .

None of them should be mocked.They dedicate their lives to Islam and legislate according to the extent of their understanding,it doesn't make them infallible but it certainly makes them respectable for trying at least.Remember when you mock them you are mocking a Muslim,when you should be protecting their Hurma and Karam, and you will see how Allah swt will mock you for that in return when your time comes,carry on like that.They sometimes come up with brilliant answers sometimes not,it is up to you to follow them or not in that particular ruling.Take the positive and leave the bad.End of the story.I do make this mistake when caught in the turmoil and passion of some discussion too,May Allah swt spare me from that kind of agresivity as if it wasn 't a Muslim we are talking too,,when i read myself again afterwards i get an objection of conscience Ya Haleem Ya ghaffar. When we will stand up and ask the right questions we will get the right answers.When we start asking intelligent questions we will get intelligent scholars.Let this advice be a reminder to all of us ,Inshallah.

PS.You Muslims are worse than babies sometimes wallah ,You don't even even let me have my holidays in peace.I came for like 5 minutes to TTi and i see this,too late can t help it ,am concerned.

Sheikh Al Albani Advice to those who love to refute

[yt]ogoSEAsS9ho[/yt]
 

Nm_17

New Member
:salam2:

Everyone tries to justify what they are doing is right in Islam even when it is clearly haraam. BUT YOU CANNOT JUSTIFY what is written in the Quran and the Hadith, no matter what anyone else says be it a sheikh or a brother/sister.

I totally agree with Faraa on this one :) and inshallah Allah (swt) will increase our knowledge on this matter and guide us to the right path :D
 

az101

http://www.miraathpublications.net/
It is Harram to touch a non-mahram women. Unless there is a Serious Emergency ( life or death situation )
 
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