Should I disobey my husband?

[Amina 1]

Assalam Alaikum


I have been fasting on monday and thursday's this week I am fasting all week because tue wed and thurs are the 13th 14th and 15th. I read that if we fast these three days it is like fasting for a year? Anyway my question is that last week on thurs my husband came home at 12pm and told me to brake my fast when I did not he was mad.:angryblue: Today my husband is off and wants to go grill out at the park again he is asking me to break my fast. He says that he is my husband and that I have to break my fast since these fasts are not obligatory.If I don't break my fast he says that I will be disobeying my husband. Am I supposed to break my fast if my husband asks me to?

 

[saifkhan]

Salam Alaikum warahmatullah....

I dont think so.....i dont understand why he is doing such ...like to go out for a grill when you r fasting....?/?
I think its not okay to break the fast...if he has got a plan....he can ask you the day before...that he wants you to go grill for the next day....

anyways....tell him with a convincing voice...inshaa'Allah that will do.....tell him that Siam is better than Grill.....lolz...or you can have your Iftaar at grill....

Jazakallahu Khairan wa barakallahu feekum
wassalam

 

[hayat84]

salam 'alikum sister,I don't agree with your husband,by myself he hasn't any right to command you to break what is written in Sunnah.a husband must be respected,but he shouldn't exagerate with his requests,so if you wish to fast thinking to Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala,you have to fast till the last minute each time you'll wish.the freedom is a sacred right of each human being,so,what should you do if your husband for example forbides you to write to TTI?you may pay attention to him or not?When I wish to fast during Monday and Thursday,my husband often asks me to put the ring on,so that we fast together.we muslims must obey to Allah's Will and to bring respect to our husbands,but we should not put our heads down their feet.
P.S:mine is just an opinion,if I made a mistake correct me,please.
wa 'alikum salam

 

[BinKhadija]

Asslam'u alykum,

Perhaps you should persuade him to let it go this time... but yes, it's not permissible for a sister to start a voluntary fast without her husband's permission. Allah knows why (and we shouldn't doubt..). Subhan Allah.

Prophet (may peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) said,

“No woman should fast when her husband is present except with his permission.”

(Reported by Alb-Bukhaari, 4793)

Wa'salaam

 

[ShyHijabi]

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not permissible for a woman to fast when her husband is present except with his permission.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5195; Muslim, 1026.

A version narrated by Ahmad (9813) says: “No woman should fast a single day when her husband is present except with his permission, except Ramadaan.”

Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb, 1052.

Here's more daleel.....http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/50732/wife%20breaking%20fast

 

[hayat84]

:salam2:
I too read these hadiths, in which is not allowed for a woman to fast without her husbad's permission,but think that times changed,a reverted woman like me couldn't accept that her husband forbide her such an important duty like fasting during those two days.Allah knows it best,but I like to believe that He shouldn't command to a woman to obey to her husband till this manner.The Quran doesn't say that and the hadiths are just the words that were written by the companions of the ProphetSAWS,and I don't think that if a husband likes to eat every day,can oblige his wife to do the same.Sorry for my insistence:shymuslima1:

 

[revert2007]

Assalam Alaikum


I have been fasting on monday and thursday's this week I am fasting all week because tue wed and thurs are the 13th 14th and 15th. I read that if we fast these three days it is like fasting for a year? Anyway my question is that last week on thurs my husband came home at 12pm and told me to brake my fast when I did not he was mad.:angryblue: Today my husband is off and wants to go grill out at the park again he is asking me to break my fast. He says that he is my husband and that I have to break my fast since these fasts are not obligatory.If I don't break my fast he says that I will be disobeying my husband. Am I supposed to break my fast if my husband asks me to?

Assalamualikum..Your husband is right.You are forbidden to fast sunnah without asking his permission.When he asked you to break the fast and you didn't then it is a sin.

Next time whenever u wanna do sunnah fast,make sure u ask his permission..as obeying husband and fulfilling his desire is obligatory and sunnah fasting is just sunnah and not obligatory.

Allah knows the best.

 

[muslimda3ee]

:salam2:

no you shouldn't disobey him in this matter.

you are understanding the hadith about fasting incorrectly.

it is either you

fast 3 days of the month (the white days are the best which are middle of the lunar month but it could be any 3 days)

or you fast monday and thursday. Monday and Thursday fasting is the higher level.

Finally if you are in even higher level of mode it would be fast every other day like the prophet Da'ood, as, but you should do this from the start, you should graduate from one to the other. This is how I understand the hadith.


you should work it out with your husband, express how you feel and that you want to do it. And mention to him that you would like to do it, but with his permission. In sha Allah, Allah will write for you the good deed as if you did it, if he prevents you. As you may already know just thinking of a good deed there is a reward of +1, and if you do it becomes +10 and if you think of bad deed and don't do it, +1 and if you do the bad deed it is -1.

in sha Allah some will post the hadiths, these were from the top of my head.

wa Allah ya'lam

 

[Amina 1]

Salam Alaikum warahmatullah....

I dont think so.....i dont understand why he is doing such ...like to go out for a grill when you r fasting....?/?
I think its not okay to break the fast...if he has got a plan....he can ask you the day before...that he wants you to go grill for the next day....

anyways....tell him with a convincing voice...inshaa'Allah that will do.....tell him that Siam is better than Grill.....lolz...or you can have your Iftaar at grill....

Jazakallahu Khairan wa barakallahu feekum
wassalam

Jazaka Allahu Khayr for your reply

 

[Amina 1]

salam 'alikum sister,I don't agree with your husband,by myself he hasn't any right to command you to break what is written in Sunnah.a husband must be respected,but he shouldn't exagerate with his requests,so if you wish to fast thinking to Allah Subhana wa Ta'ala,you have to fast till the last minute each time you'll wish.the freedom is a sacred right of each human being,so,what should you do if your husband for example forbides you to write to TTI?you may pay attention to him or not?When I wish to fast during Monday and Thursday,my husband often asks me to put the ring on,so that we fast together.we muslims must obey to Allah's Will and to bring respect to our husbands,but we should not put our heads down their feet.
P.S:mine is just an opinion,if I made a mistake correct me,please.
wa 'alikum salam

Jazaka Allahu Khayran I also think it was not right for him to ask.

 

[Amina 1]

Asslam'u alykum,

Perhaps you should persuade him to let it go this time... but yes, it's not permissible for a sister to start a voluntary fast without her husband's permission. Allah knows why (and we shouldn't doubt..). Subhan Allah.

Prophet (may peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) said,

“No woman should fast when her husband is present except with his permission.”

(Reported by Alb-Bukhaari, 4793)

Wa'salaam

Jazaka Allahu Khayr
I did not know of this I guess I will break my fast per his request.

 

[Amina 1]

Here's more daleel.....http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/50732/wife%20breaking%20fast

Jazaka Allahu Khayran May Allah forgive me for not knowing.:tti_sister:

 

[Amina 1]

:salam2:
I too read these hadiths, in which is not allowed for a woman to fast without her husbad's permission,but think that times changed,a reverted woman like me couldn't accept that her husband forbide her such an important duty like fasting during those two days.Allah knows it best,but I like to believe that He shouldn't command to a woman to obey to her husband till this manner.The Quran doesn't say that and the hadiths are just the words that were written by the companions of the ProphetSAWS,and I don't think that if a husband likes to eat every day,can oblige his wife to do the same.Sorry for my insistence:shymuslima1:

Jazaka Allahu Khayra
I feel the same as you but I do believe in following the hadith's So I will listen to my husbands wish's. I have been talking about fasting these three days for a whole week . I was hoping he would fast with me.

 

[Amina 1]

Assalamualikum..Your husband is right.You are forbidden to fast sunnah without asking his permission.When he asked you to break the fast and you didn't then it is a sin.

Next time whenever u wanna do sunnah fast,make sure u ask his permission..as obeying husband and fulfilling his desire is obligatory and sunnah fasting is just sunnah and not obligatory.

Allah knows the best.

Jazaka Allahu Khayran
I did not know may Allah forgive me. :tti_sister: I have been asking him to fast with me but I never asked if I could

 

[Amina 1]

:salam2:

no you shouldn't disobey him in this matter.

you are understanding the hadith about fasting incorrectly.

it is either you

fast 3 days of the month (the white days are the best which are middle of the lunar month but it could be any 3 days)

or you fast monday and thursday. Monday and Thursday fasting is the higher level.

Finally if you are in even higher level of mode it would be fast every other day like the prophet Da'ood, as, but you should do this from the start, you should graduate from one to the other. This is how I understand the hadith.


you should work it out with your husband, express how you feel and that you want to do it. And mention to him that you would like to do it, but with his permission. In sha Allah, Allah will write for you the good deed as if you did it, if he prevents you. As you may already know just thinking of a good deed there is a reward of +1, and if you do it becomes +10 and if you think of bad deed and don't do it, +1 and if you do the bad deed it is -1.

in sha Allah some will post the hadiths, these were from the top of my head.

wa Allah ya'lam

Jazakaa Allahu Khayran Katheera

 

[Ayyub]

Should I disobey my husband?
The answer to this question would be clearly no!As long as he doesn't ask somthing unislamic of you you should listen to your husband sister.


Muslim mentioned in his book that Asma bint Yazid came to the prophet (saw) and said that men were favoured with many things.
Such as Jihad,Friday prayer,obligatory prayer in the mosque,attending funerlas etc. and men get good deeds for.
The prophet (saw) answered that all the good deeds a men gets by doing this deeds the women got the same by obeying their husband's.

I hope sister that you see that you will get a big good deedon your "account" if you obey your husband .

 

[arzafar]

Should I disobey my husband?
The answer to this question would be clearly no!As long as he doesn't ask somthing unislamic of you you should listen to your husband sister.


Muslim mentioned in his book that Asma bint Yazid came to the prophet (saw) and said that men were favoured with many things.
Such as Jihad,Friday prayer,obligatory prayer in the mosque,attending funerlas etc. and men get good deeds for.
The prophet (saw) answered that all the good deeds a men gets by doing this deeds the women got the same by obeying their husband's.

I hope sister that you see that you will get a big good deedon your "account" if you obey your husband .

is that true. That's sounds unfair!

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

I know this is wrong but I had to laugh at this post. Here I am twice divorced and Insha"Allah I will be married in July and I read the title. I had to respond.

Having the blessing of a Muslim husband is like tasting heaven on Earth. What a treasure to have and to hold. I can not but shout Alhumdullila everywhere. The mere thought of the warriors garmet to protect you should make every woman weep. Here is a man who rejects wrong for the Love of Allah. Here is the solider who ties his horse and faces the enemy in the eye.
Here is the gentle protector of his family, his masjid, his ummath, the one who knows his Belief so firmly that he will die to honor Allah.

I humbly think it is a good idea to honor the request of your husband. The other side of the coin...when there is no husband to honor is a hard place to be. No woman wishes for angels to curse her.

 

[Dr.Khan]

Jazaka Allahu Khayra
I feel the same as you but I do believe in following the hadith's So I will listen to my husbands wish's. I have been talking about fasting these three days for a whole week . I was hoping he would fast with me.

:salam2:
Please don't be sad sister, if you just can't see the light in this topic and are only saying you will obey your husband to respect the Prophet PBUH then just think of it as a test in life. InshAllah you will be rewarded greatly, don't forget Allah knows how we think and he also knows WHY we think how we think. Your Lord is the most just.

take care

 

[Amina 1]

Should I disobey my husband?
The answer to this question would be clearly no!As long as he doesn't ask somthing unislamic of you you should listen to your husband sister.


Muslim mentioned in his book that Asma bint Yazid came to the prophet (saw) and said that men were favoured with many things.
Such as Jihad,Friday prayer,obligatory prayer in the mosque,attending funerlas etc. and men get good deeds for.
The prophet (saw) answered that all the good deeds a men gets by doing this deeds the women got the same by obeying their husband's.

I hope sister that you see that you will get a big good deedon your "account" if you obey your husband .

Jazaka Allahu Khayr
Is this true I thought everyone was responsible for there own actions. Allah knows best