To hug a muslims father in-law

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  • yes very

    Votes: 1 50.0%
  • no its common sense

    Votes: 1 50.0%
  • not at all

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • i dont care

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    2
  • Poll closed .
Selamu alykum,
I would like to know if it is haram for a muslima to hug or kiss her father in-law on the cheek. He is marham but he's not a blood relative, and secondly I'd like to know if it is haram say for me to be in a room with my brother in-law and young children. Ive tried to research this on my own with hadiths but I have been unsuccessful.
 

esperanza

revert of many years
Selamu alykum,
I would like to know if it is haram for a muslima to hug or kiss her father in-law on the cheek. He is marham but he's not a blood relative, and secondly I'd like to know if it is haram say for me to be in a room with my brother in-law and young children. Ive tried to research this on my own with hadiths but I have been unsuccessful.

DEAR SISTER

firstly welome to the site

as far as i know it is not haram to hug the father in law or hug him on the ccheek, i married in to a muslim family,and personally idont do this ,but other members do

as for your brother in law,we are always warned about this,,but if their are cchildren present ,i would have thought its ok ,but you must wait for other respnses on this

nice to have you here sister
 

Isra

aka Tree2008
Selamu alykum,
I would like to know if it is haram for a muslima to hug or kiss her father in-law on the cheek. He is marham but he's not a blood relative, and secondly I'd like to know if it is haram say for me to be in a room with my brother in-law and young children. Ive tried to research this on my own with hadiths but I have been unsuccessful.

Wa alaikome salam

Welcome to TTI sister. I hope your time here is very beneficial for you.

I am also a revert and I have been married for a little over a year now. My culture is very different than my husbands so when I first came to live with him and met his family I didnt know exactly what I should do or how I should act so I just watched and learned. When I first met his family all of the women kissed my cheeks and the men all extended their hands (including my father in law) so I just shook his hand but now that I am really comfortable with his family and they are comfortable with me I kiss both his parents on top of the head just as I have watched the other children do including my husband. I call his parents Inna and Apa too like the other kids do.

My suggestion would be if you feel comfortable enough then treat his parents with the same respect he shows them. If you dont feel comfortable or if you feel they are not comfortable with you then a handshake is fine Im sure.

As far as his brothers are concerned you should always be in full hijab when around them because they are non mahram for you. I dont think it is wise to be alone in a room with his brothers even if there are children around but I suppose it depends on the age of the children. If they are very small children I dont think they are mature enough to be sufficient for you to be alone in the same room with your brother in law but if the children are in their teens that could be a different situation. As sister Esperanza suggested lets wait to hear from a member with more knowledge inshallah.

:hijabi:
 

nyerekareem

abdur-rahman
“… and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons…” [al-Noor 24:31]. Their husband’s fathers and their husband’s sons are mahrams of the woman by marriage. Allaah mentioned them along with their (the women’s own) fathers and sons, and made them all the same in the sense that women may display their adornments in front of them. (Al-Mughni, 6/555)
 

hayat84

I'm not what you believe
I personally say that I have a really good relationship with my in-laws.my father in-law is older than my father and when it happens that I see him after much time,it's like kissing or hugging my own father.I don't open my arms but I shake my hand with my father in-law and I'm proud of it....in my maroccan family we never make such bad thoughts...we are respectful and we know our limits,we don't spend all the time together and when it happens that I see one of my maroccan relatives after many months,it often happens that they hug me and not vice-versa,this to demonstrate how much unconditionated love they give to me
 

islamerica

1 Ummah under God
Wa'alaikum as'salaam,

welcome to the forum dear sister. I hope you enjoy your stay here among us and benefit from each other.

As others have stated, your fater in law is your mahram and becomes your mahram for life. As far as hugging and kissing him, that varies from culture to culture and family to family within the same culture. some are more liberal and open to the idea while others are more reserve and conservative. Some don't even hug and kiss their own father like that once they grow up, out of shyness and modesty. So you just have to see what type of family you are married into, how they go about it and just go with the flow.

As for brother in law, they are non-mahrams and strictly forbidden to be alone with them. You can read more on that here inshallah:

http://islamqa.com/en/ref/217
 

Munawar

Striving for Paradise
“… and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons…” [al-Noor 24:31]. Their husband’s fathers and their husband’s sons are mahrams of the woman by marriage. Allaah mentioned them along with their (the women’s own) fathers and sons, and made them all the same in the sense that women may display their adornments in front of them. (Al-Mughni, 6/555)

:salam2:
Welcome to Islam and ro TTI dear sister,

Brother nyerekareem has answered ypur question.
Yes you can kiss your father-in-law on his cheeks.
You can stay with your brother in law in a room but in Hijab.

:salam2:
 
Thank You

Salamu Alykum,
Thank you everyone for you help! My questions have been answered. My personal opinion on these subjects is that 1. I don't feel comfortable to hug or kiss my father in-law. I personally feel, yes he is marham but he is not a blood relative and I should be even more modest around him than my father. 2. I felt before I asked the question that it was haram for me to be in a room with young children and my brother in-law. The young children are only 2 and 4 so they wouldn't count and my brother in-laws are in their 20's. I was getting mix reviews since I live with them some in my family said it was ok and there for made me second guess my initial reasoning.
 
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