:salam2:
What are you talking about sis? Did you get into a fight with your husband? I pray you well Insha Allah!
Dear sister , I am sure that he loves you , every father loves his kids , please try to treat your father in the best way you can .....talk with him quietly and with respect , don't pay attention to his negative remarks , do what he ask you to do accept disobeying Allah subhanahu wa taala ......please sister train yourself to hold your emotions:muslim_child: and control your nerves :angryred:.....this will make you closer to Allah and happier .Show him the great manners of Islam I know it is not easy but we have to do so.
:salam2:
Ohh! I've been there sis. With my dad, he can be unpredictable at times. Where's you mom? I'm sure she wiill help you. Like a_stranger said no matter what be kind to your dad.And if you fear that he might physically harm you, I suggest call a family member. Insha"Allah I will pray for you for everything to get better.Stay strong and be patient sis.
don't U wish you would high five them in the face with a chair? Lol. heheheheheh.. yes, pease make duaa. Ameen! I'll stay strong.
I hope I don't go mad! :angryred:
This is very hard.
Assalamu Alaikkum warahamatullahi wa barakatuhu,
Sister, I want you to reflect upon one quote I read recently:
“If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?”
I hope you find answers to your problems soon. May Allah Guide you.
As'alaamu Alaikkum Sakeena
We don't know the exact problems you are having but bear this mind when you are dealing with your parents.
Sahih International
And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination. 31:14
hmm not really lol but yes stay strong sis, I had to go through this many a times in the past. And Insha'Allah i dont have to go through it again. I'll make dua for the both of us.
:salam2:
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Sister I don't know if it would help what i'm gonna say.
When someone is behaving badly, you may look at the situation from an angle somethng like:
"Alhamdullilah I am not like that". It's a kind of a disease or a weakness, which is the lack of proper control of behaviour, and they can help it if they really put their mind to it. The prophet pbuh taught us that when we see someone with an illness, we should thank Allah swt that we don't have the same, and we make dua for the ill person to get better.
So, in a way you can try and pitty this sort of person, because they don't know any better. When we pitty someone, we tend to take what they say/do less personally.
I came across a person who was like you mentioned. This person believe it or not, used to envy clam people, used to wonder how they do it, how they sort what upsets them in a mannerly way.
It is an absolutely difficult matter to deal with, and you can work towards ignoring the negativity of what they say. You can work towards building techniques. There are techniques that you can read up on; how to diffuse anger ; to turn a tense situation into a manageable one. Sometimes what could help a difficult situation is when you tune into the person's feelings, show a lot of understanding, show much appreciation on slightest positive behaviour. Parents like to feel they're good parents. Start with the praising of the positive things that he did. It could gear him towards trying to maintain it.
Sometimes damaged relationships don't show results quick enough, but persevere.
You know the saying "Kill them with kindness".
The prophet pbuhtaught us that kindness only brings good, and lack of it makes things ugly. (My translation to a hadith)
You can try and show a lot of understanding, tuning into a persons feelings. Think how counsellors deal with difficult clients.
J
I once read that the one keen on the change is the one the need to start the change. You want the results inshallah. so you can think of different approaches that may go down better with your father. May Allah swt give you the strength. Ameen!
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:ma: sister , very nice post , may Allah reward you for it, I like to add that w e muslems deal with most loving forgiving God, if we forgive others , treat them nicely we are rewarded by Allah. Don't we have to collect hasanat ( good deeds ) to be saved on the day of judgment ?
Parents work hard for their children , they expect love, respect, understanding from their children and they deserve it. Most of our problems start when we look from our own side neglecting the other opposite side . To solve problem we should try put ourselves in the opposite side for a while to understand .
Sister I don't know if it would help what i'm gonna say.
When someone is behaving badly, you may look at the situation from an angle somethng like:
"Alhamdullilah I am not like that". It's a kind of a disease or a weakness, which is the lack of proper control of behaviour, and they can help it if they really put their mind to it. The prophet pbuh taught us that when we see someone with an illness, we should thank Allah swt that we don't have the same, and we make dua for the ill person to get better.
So, in a way you can try and pitty this sort of person, because they don't know any better. When we pitty someone, we tend to take what they say/do less personally.
I came across a person who was like you mentioned. This person believe it or not, used to envy clam people, used to wonder how they do it, how they sort what upsets them in a mannerly way.
It is an absolutely difficult matter to deal with, and you can work towards ignoring the negativity of what they say. You can work towards building techniques. There are techniques that you can read up on; how to diffuse anger ; to turn a tense situation into a manageable one. Sometimes what could help a difficult situation is when you tune into the person's feelings, show a lot of understanding, show much appreciation on slightest positive behaviour. Parents like to feel they're good parents. Start with the praising of the positive things that he did. It could gear him towards trying to maintain it. Think how counsellors deal with difficult clients.
Sometimes damaged relationships don't show results quick enough, but persevere.
You know the saying "Kill them with kindness".
The prophet pbuhtaught us that kindness only brings good, and lack of it makes things ugly. (My translation to a hadith)
I once read that the one keen on the change is the one the need to start the change. You want the results inshallah. so you can think of different approaches that may go down better with your father. May Allah swt give you the strength. Ameen!