salam,
i've been married for just over 4 years. i have a boy almost 5 and a 2 year old girl.
i love my husband so much. after marriage we went through alot alot too much that almost led to divorce. a sheikh saw me and adviced me of my illness and treated me. my husband and i got back on track and he stood by me to the whole way and never let me go. he ignored and passed some of my behaviour because he knew i wasnt able to control it at times.
but he would take out the quran and read on me to help me calm down. he always helped me. if it was someone else, they would probably re marry because their wife is not fit, thats okay to do and understandable. but my husband is a man, he took care of me, he tells me 'im his responsibility in islam and family, if he doesnt pick me up when i faint or help me when im ill and if he just gave me to my parents, what does that make him infront of Allah.' he tells me 'im his wife, the mother of our children, we agreed to take care of each other through sickness etc, and thats the reason why he will never let me go and not just because of repetation' after all, he gets many rewards inshallah for his great support and action.
i drop my son off at school every morning, when i come back, he would have suprised me, fed my daughter breakfast, brushed her hair and dressed her, mop the floor. i come and smell the house its beautiful. i leave my daughter with him when i drop my son at school. so why does he do this in the morning? because when i come back, i have to drop him at work too. at 3pm i pick up my son, im home by quater to 4pm, then 5pm i have to pick up my husband. considering, once it hits 12pm, i become weak and have no strength so in the morning, its important to get as much housework as possible. since my husband is working, he still makes time to help me.
after 2.30pm alhumdulilah im energy is back because i get rest. but not always i take a break during this time, maybe 2 or 3 times a week.
anyway, my whole point is there is no such thing as a perfect couple / marriage, you can make it as perfect as possible but there will always be trials and tests from Allah and our patience is requried in order to pass.
always be there for you partner, never say you've had enough of them, fix the problem and bring quran into your house and make your house a islamic environment. many duas is required, and remember, PRAY JAMAAN you and your wife together. its becauiful. when your upset with her or him, talk about it or read quran and make dua and ask Allah to make all the present problems go and allow you and your wife to be happy. then you'll see how happy it is.
remember, everything that happens, Allah knows its going to happen, he tests you, so show him your faith and iman, make dua, and always read quran with your wife and pray together. religion, religion ISLAM ISLAM is the answer to a great marriage. its always ISLAM. thats your answer.
dont sit there pondering of a perfect or nice marriage, work on it, ask for it, pray, make dua, pray tahajjud salah, there are many things that can help you find your answers, just follow ISLAM and worship Allah and let it come from him and let him bring her or him to you, dont search too too too much, dont not search at all, dont over think and make all your thoughts on when im going to get marriage, relax it, let it come to you from allah because after all, if you find it, it will never be as beautiful as what Allah will bring to you if you follow it with islamic enviornment.
)
