A Distrubing PM

Status
Not open for further replies.

Aapa

Mirajmom
Assalaam walaikum,

I recieved a PM that was disturbing. I did not comprehend all of it.

The reason I am writing this and not contacting an adminstrator is I need feedback. I am confused.

From what I could gather the author was upset about a recent thread. His wife was upset about the secular comments made to a sixteen year old.
I could not decipher what they want to do..something about mods and administrators several members being upset.

I am surprised at the PM. Islam has always been the faith to answer questions. It is in the legacy of Islam to be open and honest. Many of the hadiths describe very explict details of human life.

Why are we getting upset about marriage and sexuality. What does a members wife have to do with our discussions. And is it not in our interest to discuss within the guidelines of respect and not be ignorant.
 

alf2

Islam is a way of life
No idea, people get angry over anything.
Was the comment and such on THIS site?
 

BrotherInIslam7

La Illaha Illa Allah
Staff member
Salaamalaykum respected sister,

Let us all concentrate our energies on making ibadah in Ramadan. Such drawn out discussions will divert us from our main goal.

If you wish to give naseeha as an elder sister, perhaps you should reply to the PM.

And if you received something that was negative/abusive, you should inform the mods and they will take care of the necessary.

We do not know the contents of that PM. Nor is it our business to discuss it. If someone has a negative experience on TTI, InshaAllah the mods can safeguard his/her rights by warning or banning the user in question.

Hope your fasts are going well.. Please do remember us all in your supplications. BarakAllahu Feeki.

Wasalaamalaykum waa rahmatullahi
 

hayat84

I'm not what you believe
:salam2:
if this person sent you a PM maybe she/he wanted to tell you something in private.PM section is made to receive and send PMs and we who read now don't take care about what a person sent you because it's private.if you judge that that person disturbed you writing bad words or offending you,well it depends from you,not from us who read here.moreover you should send a PM to a moderator.:astag:
 

ShyHijabi

Junior Member
:salam2:

I got the same PM sister, I wrote back a succinct reply that should leave no room for misinterpretation. In the end I think actions such as this reveal a need for the person to still mature and grow. In the end I have to constantly remind myself that not everyone on here has the life experiences necessary to view situations from multiple points of view. They use their own limited experiences to judge everything.
 

ShahnazZ

Striving2BeAStranger
Curiouser and curiouser. I'm wondering about these PMs now and what exactly was said in them. Also if this is the reason that thread was removed...
 

Aapa

Mirajmom
Assalaam walaikum,

It was plain simple weird.


Why is it that anytime I question people jump the gun these days and think I am on the attack. Am I that obtuse and poor a writer that I can not convey a single thought without it being taken out of context.

In this thread I asked for feedback. I was concerned.

SIster Hyat..I am well aware of the PM section. I brought this out in the open as Islam is open.

I am questioning the purpose of the particular PM.
 

Gernada1492

A Muslim
what exactly is the PM about? i have got one as well... as sister shy hijabi said, we need to have different view of that perhaps?
 

ShyHijabi

Junior Member
:salam2:

The purpose of the PM was to complain instead of seek to expand one's knowledge. The purpose was to lash out at others instead of act as our Prophet instructed and to always be humble and earnest in our pursuit of knowledge. The purpose was to create more fractures in our ummah by labeling people according to one's own personal opinion of what a "real" Muslim is supposed to be.

What I find especially humorous was I was accused of being secular and then in the next breath a salafi. (very contradictory) I posted sahih hadiths on the thread that was brought in question so I don't know where exactly the problem lies. It would seem some prefer their own cultural beliefs and practices to that of the Qur'an and Hadiths. Nothing new under the sun.
 

ShahnazZ

Striving2BeAStranger
Fascinating. I wonder why I didn't receive one, especially since I responded to that thread as well.
 

Aapa

Mirajmom
Assalaam walaikum,

Sister Shyhijabi you are one of the voices of reason around here. You are not one who writes in an irrational tone.

Me..on the other hand...I am stuck...why is the brothers wife upset? I do not get it.

Anyhow...I am going to pray now and ask Allah to give me energy to finish fasting today. Alhumdullila, I have been able to fast for seven days..without being sick. Insha'Allah...I will be able to make it another two hours.

Shahnaz...I remember your responses..they were good. I do not know. I was unaware the thread was removed. That would be a shame as most of the responses were stating the same thing. Everyone was advocating an Islamic solution.

A members wife gets upset...several female members recieve PM's...which are bizarre..and the thread is removed.
 

Gernada1492

A Muslim
His wife was not upset. At least this is not written in PM which I have got. His wife follows the same aqeedah , which is mentioned at TTS

@shyhijabi: If he wouldnot have knowledge, he wud not have been bizarre of the stuff which has happened here now and many times before.

REgarding sahi Hadith which u said u have posted, there isnt justs 1 hadith , you can consider and put the rest aside. Rules must be by considering all ahadith and many other factors. So quoting and a hadith and judging on the base of it, might not be appropriate.

Labelling? did u try reading some other forums apart from this forum ever? if not, then do so please, before saying anything. It seems that pakistani culture is taking over u as u say it first and then think later
 

zainsmommy

Junior Member
His wife was not upset. At least this is not written in PM which I have got. His wife follows the same aqeedah , which is mentioned at TTS

@shyhijabi: If he wouldnot have knowledge, he wud not have been bizarre of the stuff which has happened here now and many times before.

REgarding sahi Hadith which u said u have posted, there isnt justs 1 hadith , you can consider and put the rest aside. Rules must be by considering all ahadith and many other factors. So quoting and a hadith and judging on the base of it, might not be appropriate.

Labelling? did u try reading some other forums apart from this forum ever? if not, then do so please, before saying anything. It seems that pakistani culture is taking over u as u say it first and then think later


I signed in to reply to this thread...then signed out...then back in again. I did not want to be involved with something that I know nothing of...BUT, I think this comment just kicked my emotions in high gear.

I will refrain from commenting or saying what I really want to, as this is RAMADAN...but will say this...I cannot believe that someone would say such a thing as this "Labelling? did u try reading some other forums apart from this forum ever? if not, then do so please, before saying anything. It seems that pakistani culture is taking over u as u say it first and then think later" during the most holy month of Ramadan when we should be adhering to one of the most important and basic things. As a convert married to a Pakistani myself, I find this very offensive! SubhanaAllah!

I am truly sad about whatever has happened that sparked a Brother to PM a Sister/s with what appears to be not so nice words. AstagfirAlluh!

May Allah forgive us our sins and May He remind us of the importance of remaining patient and forgiving--especially during this month of Ramadan! May Allah accept our fasts--even though some of us have entered into such things that could potentially void it(backbiting, lying, failure to lower our gaze etc etc etc)
And May Allah touch the hearts of each person involved--and those not--and bestow His mercy and Blessings on each. Ameen

Please...it is Ramadan! I know the Sister's in question and I have the utmost respect and admiration for each of them...I have no doubt they are among those rightly guided. MashaAllah...may we all keep in mind there will always be a difference of opinion.

May you all have a blessed Ramadan and forgive me if I have over stepped my boundary or contradicted myself in anyway--it was not my intention.
 

samiha

---------
Staff member
:salam2:

I agree with zainsmommy on this. SubhanAllaah. I haven't been very active on this site lately, however my dear brothers and sisters truly this is not the month to engage in this kind of discourse.

Honestly since I don't believe this discussion will be fruitful in the end, nor have any definite outcome. And as an advice I would like to remind everyone to be respectful of each other. Please do not attack our members as we are all here for the sake of Allaah inshaAllaah and should treat each individual like we ourselves would like to be regarded.

We know there are some problems, as there are bound to be, but if there are any specific concerns with other members then please do inform a Mod or report it and we'll do what we can to fix it inshaAllaah. I ask Allaah that TTI become a place for us to come together in goodness and learn, but not become a place of quarrels and factions.

BarakAllaahu feekum.

wasalam
 

ditta

Alhamdu'Lillaah
Staff member
As-salaamu'Alaykum,

Firstly, the thread has not been deleted, it has been placed under moderation.

Secondly, I did not receive this PM although if only sister's received this, then please contact a sister moderator who will Insha'Allaah be able to deal with it.

Thirdly, I feel that the responses given addressed the question. Sadly, the type of question resulted in 'difficulty' of offering a practical solution. There was nothing 'secular' in the responses rather most advices followed a 'questioning' route of one's self.

It could be said that there were too many responses?

Regardless, I think the brother understood the gist of the advices given and it may have just prolonged the thread unnecessarily.

Finally, we should try to be patient with others and show gentleness. Allaah (subhaanahu wa ta'aala) knows best, maybe through such exemplary behaviour a person may reflect and rectify themselves.

Wa-alaykum-us-Salaam.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top