Salamalaykam,
I have both ADHD and Stuttering. It has really affected me both personally and professionally. I was studying accounting in college but i dropped out because my symptoms were getting in the way and i dont want to take medication. My stuttering has really affected my being able to get and keep a job. Now i run a small grocery store in toronto, which isnt very profitable and just one month ago my dad past away which makes it even harder on me now. Is there any advice anyone can give me?
Walaikum Asalam warahmatullahi wabrakhatuh,
Have patience my brother!
Trials and tribulations are a part of life. We do not like them; we do not like to go through them; but eventually we accept them. Even if we pray, fast, pay our zakat and do all different forms of ibadat we still get tested. Sadness sometimes fills our hearts. We could be the best of practicing Muslims, yet poor and unable to put food on our table. We could be rich yet lonely, or young yet unhealthy. It is in these instances that shaytan starts toying with our head. We look at what others have, especially the non-Muslims, and our core gets rattled. The shaytan ignites a fire that gets our blood boiling, hopelessness and frustration set in, and we ask “Oh Allah, why me?! Why am I being punished?”
Psychologists tell us that human beings go through five stages of emotion when struck with a calamity. Understanding the different stages of grief minimizes the first four stages (which are denial, anger, bargaining and depression) and gets us to the final stage – which is acceptance. We all went through these stages on many different occasions, Because Allah swa said in the Quran "Ye shall certainly be tried and tested in your possessions and in your personal selves. (3:186)
Do men think that they will be left alone on saying “We believe” and that they will not be tested? (29:2)
Be sure We shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil); but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere. (2:155) .
Trials are a Sign of Love By Allah
Often whenever we are tested by trails we assume that Allah swa does not love us. So should remember about the Companions of the Prophet (p) who were severely persecuted or even killed after becoming Muslim, an event that wipes out all past sins. Even the prophets of Allah, the best of all people who ever walked on the face of the earth, were persecuted by their community without exception. Was Yusuf Alayhi saltu wasalam not thrown into a well, sold as a slave, and then thrown back into a prison? Did Ayub Asw not face severest of trials (sufer from disease for 18 or 19 years)one after another, and was eventually left out by all except his wife? In fact, the Qur’an tells us that many prophets were brutally killed by the unbelievers.
These examples should establish the fact that trials and tribulations are not a sign of Allah’s displeasure on someone. Quite the contrary, it is rather a sign of Allah’s love on someone. The Prophet (p) said:
When Allah who is Great and Glorious loves people He afflicts them [with trials]. (Tirmidhi)
Anyone for whom Allah intends good, He makes him suffer from some affliction. (Bukhari)
When Allah intends good for His slave, He punishes him in this world, but when He intends an evil for His slave, He does not hasten to take him to task but calls him to account on the Day of Resurrection. (Tirmidhi).
Allah Never Gives a Trial That is Too Great to Bear
Human beings are created weak (4:28). When a sudden calamity or distress befalls us, we easily become overwhelmed and often cry out, “O Allah! This is too much for me to bear!”
Perhaps because we often lose sight of this fact that Allah (swt) mentions this in several places in the Qur’an:
~On no soul doth Allah place a burden greater than it can bear. (2:286)
~On no soul do We place a burden greater than it can bear: before Us is a record which clearly shows the truth: they will never be wronged. (23:62)
~No burden do We place on any soul but that which it can bear. (6:152)
~And those who believe and do good – We do not impose upon any of them a burden beyond his capacity. (7:42)
The Stronger the Faith, the Harder the Test, and the Greater the Rewar
A believer afflicted with a severe calamity should take comfort from the fact that those who have strong faith are given the harder trials. This is established by the Prophet (p). When asked about who suffers the greatest afflictions, he replied: The prophets, then those who come next to them, then those who come next to them. A man is afflicted in keeping his religion. If he is firm in his religion his trial is severe, but if there is weakness in his religion it is made light for him, and it continues like that till he walks on the earth having no sin. (Tirmidhi)
Remedies for stuttering
Make continues dua "O my Lord! Open my chest for me; make the matter easy and untie the knot in my tongue. (Surah Taha, 20:25)."
As a form of self-therapy Malcolm Fraser said in his book Self-Therapy for the Stutterer
When you start to talk, do it easily, gently and smoothly without forcing and prolonging the first sounds of words you fear.
- Stutter openly and do not try to hide the fact that you are a stutterer.
- Identify and eliminate any unusual gestures, facial contortions, or body movements which you may possibly exhibit when stuttering or trying to avoid difficulty.
- Do your best to stop all avoidance, postponement or substitution habits.
- Maintain eye contact with the person to whom you talk.
- Analyze and identify what your speech muscles are doing improperly when you stutter.
- Take advantage of block correction procedures designed to modify or eliminate your abnormal speech muscle stuttering behavior.
- Always keep moving forward as you speak (keep moving your voice from one word or sound to the next, without repeating or back-tracking).
- Try to talk with inflection and melody in a firm voice.
- Pay attention to the fluent speech you have.[
Try to teach kids Qur'an or give little nasihas in the masjid.
As For ADHD Video
May Allah make it easy for you.
has told us, walhamdulillaah. 