Challenges+Obstacles and How to overcome them

[Bawar]

Assalamu alaikum brothers and sisters!

I am not sure if it has been discussed before.
I was wondering if born muslims in general are an obstacle to non-muslims in accepting Islam?

I have come to realise that as much as Islam is appealing to the people, sadly msulims are not.

Firstly, people hesitate to accept Islam due to the constant brainwashing by the media of the general public. Secondly, due to what some muslims do.

And when some finally get the courage to accept Islam, they become more and more frustrated later on by not being absorbed or accepted into their new found religion.

It is the condition of this last group of people (reverted muslims) that hurts me the most as they live a lonely life without a genuine help from muslim community. Only the very resolute ones continue to cling to their faith and unfortunately, we loose the rest.

It is a sad fact that we can't ignore.

One of the most difficult issues that male reverts to islam face is that they struggle to find a muslim wife (born muslim) and it is a very widespread problem.

I have noticed this particularly after following the thread http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=31782 started by brother nyerekareem.

I would like brothers and sisters (specially the reverts) to point out what are the obstacles and challenges they face and how it can be addressed and overcome?

Wassalamu alaikum

 

[ShyHijabi]

Salaam,

Well as I stated on the thread you linked, there appears to be a limited acceptance. While a born Muslim will share their food, clothing, and even homes in some cases, that all changes when it comes to marrying their daughters and sons to converts. The excuses I hear are along the lines of cultural integration.

Though it is half our deen and has been commanded that we are to marry as soon as possible, the older generation has seemingly lost their focus on religion. I have actually been told to my face that if a guy were to marry me then it would look bad to the rest of the family and business partners because I am not of their ethinicity. I was told that it would make the male seem as if he is defying his parents by marrying someone they didn't choose. Not once did I hear a religious reason for my "shortcomings."

It is incredibly frustrating to come from a culture of exclusion (Orthodox Jews) to convert to an open religion where piety is the main focus...just to witness the same behavior among Muslims. The Orthodox Jews are commanded to marry their own kind (according to their beliefs) but the Muslims are commanded to marry for piety, regardless of the race of the perspective spouse. Yet today the cultural/ethinical divisions in the Ummah are just as exclusive as the Orthodox Jews. It has been disheartening to witness and experience.

I am afriad we will have to wait for this generation to grow and become the adults before we will see any significant change. The elders appear very ingrained in their prejudices and reluctant to believe any differently. In the meantime, we converts struggle with the inevitable lonliness and isolation created by our conversion.

Wasalaam

~Sarah

 

[Bawar]

:salam2: sister ShyHijabi

Yet today the cultural/ethinical divisions in the Ummah are just as exclusive as the Orthodox Jews. It has been disheartening to witness and experience.

I agree with you. And majority of the (born) muslims don't seem to be bothered by this tragic situation.

I am a born muslim and I praise Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for this blessing and thank HIM as I wonder if I would be able to find my way to Islam if I were born in a different environment.

Saying that, I feel ashamed that most born muslims are quick to stand up and defend themselves against the criticism of non muslims while they are too lazy to stand up and correct what needs correcting.

I hope I haven't angered or upset anyone, but I feel the need that we should start behaving like a muslim ummah and not muslim individuals.

Barakallahu feeki sister Shyhijabi and may Allah ta'ala grant you best of rewards for your struggles and all brothers and sisters. Ameen