For Allah`s sake Alone, tell me what life is

[K-A-K]

Salam all. I am well aware of the fact that all of you are questioned about this and I know that it troubles some. But what other option do i have. I don`t know what to do at all. I had no idea that life would take such a turn and I`d be standing here one day. But well, here i am.. requesting you guys to help me with the issues that i have.

To begin with, I was born into a Muslim family.. a family that tries to stick to the rules of Islam. i mean prayer, hijab, zakaat, family ties etc. They do all of this very well MashAllah. I do not deny that at all for i know they do it with the purity of their hearts. im sure many of you have such families and the only thing that they lack is teaching the children the true islam and how it blends in with the meaning of life. ive never been told that. from childhood till today i have been told that There is 1 God, Muhammd saww the last prophet. we have to pray 5 times a day and fast in ramadan. etc. all that i know and i have tried to do it. without really weighing the meaning of doing all this. without understanding what it means to do all that. back in my home country and this present secular state, i studied in the mostttt modern, westernized schools and university. we all know in places such as these studies mean everything. life isn`t a priority. and that is how i have spent all my life. i prayed whenever God made me pray. in my youth (im 20 now) i prayed regularly in ramadan or when my dad passed away 10 years ago. or when other relatives passed away. or whenever i had an inclination to pray. by 16 years of age, i had entered the crucial educational age and started praying regularly. probably because i wanted help from Allah. that i got. AlhamduLillah. till now by Allah`s will i have guarded my salaahs to the best of my ability. but i feel empty. i dont think i prayed for Him. i did not even know the meaning of arabic. or i prayed because of habit. or the frenzy feeling of not missing out on what you do.. talk about it...

i feel so empty and i hate myself. half a year ago. i fell ill. and i had no idea why. doctors didnt know. but as an intuition i knew Allah SWT wanted something from me. i dont know why i felt that but i did feel it. i somehow started giving time to arabic meaning with my relative uncle, who mashAllah is very learned. and i really thought about what i recited in the salaahs. and then i alone put in the best of my effort. i read and read. i prayed and prayed. and i felt happy from inside. i really did. life meant a lot to me now. but this was the climax. the breakthrough. i now had questions about life. i was at crossroads now with the views that i had been taught and the views that people had. i go to a univ here in a secular country. i see all the bad stuff but AlhamduLillah i do not engage in them. but they trouble me. i had weird courses.. all secular type. that were totally against the importance of Divine. and i learnt about crazy stuff. and it troubled me... why people would do this. And you all know Quran is very powerful. it truly disturbs a person about life if we do not give it time. and i was so excited about reading and knowing that i lost the hold. i lost it. i take it to be my fault. im not ready to play the blame game. it was my fault. i could not align the two types of knowledges. and i got lost. and im so afraid.

i had so many questions about other religions and AstaghfirUllah mine too. nobody had an answer about anything. and i now feel that i have given up on my religion. i pray. i fasted. i do everything i can. but i still have questions from life. its not right. or have i become an apostate. or a munaafiq. my family has no idea about my present state.. and therefore i feel like a munaafiq. even in this stage i havent said one bad thing about islam or life. i keep it to my self. its my burden and im carrying it. rather i share whatever good i learn with my younger siblings and cousins so that they can know what life and islam is in their youth, as opposed to me. i dont want them to go through what i am going through.

i am so torn from inside. i cant study at all. all day long i think about Allah. His Message. Which one of it is right. Is He trulyyyyy there, im sorry im writing this but i have noone here. i am blaphseming i know, but i need to know. i WANT HIM to be there. because then ill have a purpose in life. i want islam. i have no issues with hijab and abaaya. or praying 5 times or even the tahajjud. or fasting. i have no problems. and i want Allah to be there. and jannah and jahanum. i want to know what life means and that we`re here not because of some crazy explosion and random mutations.

i`ve been going through this since so many months and it only increases. my heart is so full. i cry , i pray. its as if there is some pressure on my heart.... my chest.. i feel it except when i pray to Him that He removes it. otherwise, the pressure remains. i never wanted this to happen and it has and i have no power to undo it. i think I have angered Him for he gave me chance by giving me Islam before and i didnt value it. i was too busy concentrating on this life and sidetracking salah , etc. and i feel that im a hypocrite and He hates them the most... but then i think if He has hidden my faults .. should i keep quiet about it too and pray that He guides me...! i dont know.

I have no issues with being His slave. that i am. i didnt exist at all and now i do. i had no right to exist. and yet i do... but the world troubles me. free will troubles me. nobody has ever explained this to me. why have people stopped believing in Him and have taken the other way around of social darwinism. why. is life all about this.

i want to feel Allah SWT. in my heart. the peace. has anyone ever felt that when they embraced Islam.. or not... do they feel the peace that He has to offer. I want to feel it. and will He accept me now even though I disrespected His trust. Trust me, i have been making effort. I cant fill in the void of all the years but i can still struggle. I have spent all this troubled time reading The Quran, books about islam, hadith, life, God, etc. i know its not enough... but i want to have the hope that He will help me. I fear that i really have angered Him. I had no right to question but i honestly could not control my nafs. I am Insaan afterall... i know its not an excuse,and i take the blame. I dont blame the shaytaan for it.. it was my nafs, my worldly needs that misled me. my lack of faith and indulgence in this life. i know it. but i fear that He may reject me. though i havent stopped praying to Him.

I have planned that i will study Arabic and understand the Quran inshAllah. because no language has really done justice. AlhamduLillah i have good writing skills and i want to write for Him .. about Life and how we should approach it. i want others to know it before its too late... too much of my time has already run out. i wonder if i die now, who would i be. a muslim... a hypocrite... or nothing.

i dont think it is a coincidence that all of a sudden i want to think about life. i mean before this, i was happily spending life.. i had everything.. i prayed but i dont think it was a prayer that He would have cared about since alongside i was doing wrong things like watching random tv stuff and not exactly conforming with the hijab and its associated restrictions. in short i was doing whatever i had been told was right to do. i steered my life to whatever place it went to. and now i guess, I have landed here. I want to believe in God. and not because my family believes in it. My family hasn`t exactly explained a lot about life... it was by Allah`s Mercy that i landed in a muslim home.

i sincerely want Allah to be here. and i want to feel Him. i want Him to guide me and give me answers. i know i have stupid questions but i have a finite mind and i cant think beyond a certain limit. the world and its pains trouble me. i hear about stuff and i get depressed. and then i sometimes cry and wonder if it troubles Him. afterall we are His creations and He loves them more than parents too.. He originated us... :S i am such a sadistic person. i never was one. i was so different and now i am like this. i want this to be over for the best. and i want my hypocrisy to go away.

i am extremely sorry that i shred such a long post. but trust me, i have missed out on so much. ive had a long journey... and it still is going on...

 

[K-A-K]

and i want to worship Him and love Him for His sake. as in who He is.. i want to Love Him and then fear Him... loving out of fear doesn`t make sense... we would then be worshipping Him because we`re afraid of His wrath and jahannum. :S i dont want to do that. i want to love Him and want Him to love me back. i expect too much, i know, but well, we are insaan and we want to be loved. especially by the one who created us in the first place.

 

[Seeking Allah's Mercy]

and i want to worship Him and love Him for His sake. as in who He is.. i want to Love Him and then fear Him... loving out of fear doesn`t make sense... we would then be worshipping Him because we`re afraid of His wrath and jahannum. :S i dont want to do that. i want to love Him and want Him to love me back. i expect too much, i know, but well, we are insaan and we want to be loved. especially by the one who created us in the first place.

Asalamoalaikom wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,

You know what sister, these made post want me to express something and that is. . .

. . . in the PM*Smile*

I'll reply later when I have time. gotto rush!

 

[TheAuthenticBase]

Assalaamu 'alaykum,

Ok, I dont really reply to sisters, but since im here and read te post not knowing u were a sis, and this seems like a importat post...

I say:

1) Nearly everyone goes thru what ur going thru.. even me... There were those days/weeks/months where i doubted in Islaam, Allaah's existence etc...

2) A good thing to do is to go somewhere where no one is, like on top of some huge hill and look at the dwellers of the town from above... Its really helps u in ur mind phrae and pondering over life...

3) You've said you read the Quraan, but keep at it, I dont mean in arabic, i mean in english. Read it in english, as Ibn Taymiyyah said, 'if you want to find some proof form the Quraan, you'll find it" and Wallaahi this is true....

4) You said, "i know i have stupid questions but i have a finite mind and i cant think beyond a certain limit". Know that (1) no question is stupid, maybe the way it is phrased may seem 'stupid' but no question in reality is stupid. and (2) you've sprt of answered ur thoughts/doubts in life, you said ur mind is limited, and by Allaah that is true...

5) Regarding salaah and the whole arabic language, yes I would say learn Arabic, or minimumly the meaning of what u say in salaah.... it helps u a lot.. There was a time in my life when i used 2 shake when i used2 say 'ameen' behind the imaam after faatihah bcz i used 2 feel lost and wanted 2 b guided.

6) Never stop doing the good ur doing (of reading quraan, salaah etc.)

7) i wud advice u listne 2 lectures by dr. zakir naik and likewise watch documentaries by haroon yahyaa on the topic of life etc....

8) I guess thats it for now...

 

[K-A-K]

Thanks a lot!

yes, i know a good deal of basic arabic and i now understand whatever i say in my salaah AlhamduLillah. but i want to soon study Quran Arabic in the professional sense inshAllah...

it helps a lot ... AlhamduLillah.

my imaan weakens when we see people not worrying about life. it troubles me. do they make a choice to do it themselves or they haven`t thought about life.

huh its hard to express, but i want to change and make a change, may Allah SWT give me an intuition. ameen.

 

[sachin4islam]

Assalamu Alaikum:

I will add few words for I am not an expert.

I infer reading your post that you haven't yet felt spiritual pleasure. You pray Him yet you search Him. But He is nearer to you than your Jugular vessel. If you want to feel Him picking His blessings upon yourself ,Allahu-Aalim you may still wonder in exploring Him. If you pray and look back that still you are in pains,the purity of Ibadah lessens. You pray Him ceaselessly and enact His every commandment in your every act and don't turn back to access His blessings for His blessings continuously pour on His slaves the matter is only of realization.

Believe me the day Ikhlas penetrates a heart,the complains drop down to substratum,for my Creator knows what is best for me and He who crated you,will He leave you in despair (after Ikhlas fills your heart)?.

Regards.

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

I skimmed your post.

You have to come to peace with yourself.

Do this please. Spend one day reflecting on the words of the shahada. Do not worry about anything else.

And let me know what happens. Feel free to PM me with your thoughts on this alone.

 

[Kakorot]

I hope this helps:

He is suffering from waswaas (insinuating whispers) of the Shaytaan about the Essence of Allaah

A man is experiencing waswaas (insinuating whispers) from the Shaytaan having to do with Allaah, and he is very afraid of that.

Praise be to Allaah.

The questioner has mentioned this problem and is afraid of its consequences. I say to him, Rejoice, for its consequences cannot be anything but good. By means of this waswaas, the Shaytaan tries to gain control over the believers and shake the sound belief in their hearts, and make them suffer psychological and intellectual anxiety that will affect the purity of their faith and their life, if they are believers.

This is not the first or the last time that the believers are exposed to this. It will continue so long as there is any believer in this world. The Sahaabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) also faced this problem. It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “Some of the companions of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said to him, ‘We find in ourselves thoughts that are too terrible to speak of.’ He said, ‘Are you really suffering from that?’ They said, ‘Yes.’ He said, ‘That is a clear sign of faith.’” (Narrated by Muslim).

It was narrated in al-Saheehayn, also from Abu Hurayrah, that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “The Shaytaan comes to one of you and says, ‘Who created such and such? Who created such and such?’ until he says, ‘Who created your Lord?!’ If that happens to any of you, let him seek refuge with Allaah and put a stop to these thoughts.”

It was narrated from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with them both) that a man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, “I think thoughts to myself, which I would rather be burnt to a cinder than speak of them.” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Praise be to Allaah, Who has reduced all his [the Shaytaan’s] plots to mere whispers.” (Narrated by Abu Dawood).

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in Kitaab al-Eemaan: “The believer may suffer from the whispers of the Shaytaan insinuating thoughts of kufr, which may make him feel distressed. The Sahaabah said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, some of us think thoughts which we would rather fall from heaven to earth than speak of them.’ He said, ‘That is a clear sign of faith.’ According to one report, ‘… thoughts which are too terrible to speak of.’ He said, ‘Praise be to Allaah, Who has reduced all his [the Shaytaan’s] plots to mere whispers,’ meaning that the fact that these whispers come, but they are so greatly disliked, and they are pushed away from the heart, is a clear sign of faith. This is like the mujaahid to whom the enemy comes, but he resists him until he overwhelms him, and this is a mighty jihaad… Hence the seekers of knowledge and devoted worshippers experience waswaas and doubts which others do not face, because they (the others) are not following the way prescribed by Allaah, rather they are following their own whims and desires and neglecting to remember their Lord. This is what the Shaytaan wants, in contrast to those who are striving to draw closer to their Lord by seeking knowledge and worshipping Him. He is their enemy and seeks to prevent them from drawing closer to Allaah.” (p. 147 of the Indian edition)

I say to this questioner, if you are faced with this waswaas from the Shaytaan, then fight it and resist it. Know that it can never harm you when you fulfil the duty of fighting and resisting it, and you refuse to be controlled by it. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Allaah will forgive my ummah for any insinuating whispers that may cross their minds, so long as they do not act upon it or speak of it.” (Agreed upon).

If it is said to you, Do you believe the insinuating whispers you experience? Do you think that they are true? Do you really think that Allaah is like what this waswaas says? You would say, “It is not right for us to speak of this. Glory be to You (O Allaah)! This is a great lie” [al-Noor 24:16 – interpretation of the meaning]. You would denounce that in your heart and with your tongue, and be the one who objects to it the most, for it is only whispers and thoughts that cross your mind. It is a trap set by the Shaytaan, who flows through the son of Adam like blood flows, to make you doomed and to confuse you about your religion.

Hence you will find that the Shaytan does not cast doubts or suspicions into your heart about trivial matters. For example, you may hear of the existence of great cities filled with people and buildings in the east and the west, but it would never cross your mind some day to doubt that they exist or to criticize them and say that they are in ruins and unfit for habitation, or that they are uninhabited, and so on. The Shaytaan has nothing to gain by making people doubt about these cities. But he does have a lot to gain by corrupting the believer’s faith, so he strives with his cavalry and his infantry to extinguish the light of knowledge and guidance in his heart and to make him fall into the darkness of doubt and confusion. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has told us of the appropriate remedy for that, which is to seek refuge with Allaah and put a stop to it. If a person puts a stop to that and continues to worship Allaah, seeking and hoping for (the reward) which is with Allaah, that will stop by Allaah’s leave. So turn away from all the thoughts of this kind that cross your mind. You are worshipping Allaah, calling upon Him and glorifying Him, and if you were to hear anyone ascribing to Allaah the things that are whispered to you (waswaas), you would probably kill him if you could. So the things that are whispered to you are neither real nor true, they are merely imagination and whispers which have no basis.

Our advice may be summed up as follows:

1. Seek refuge with Allaah and give up these thoughts completely, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded.

2. Remember Allaah and control yourself and do not continue to think of these whispers.

3. Occupy yourself with worship and doing good deeds, in obedience to the command of Allaah and seeking to please Him. When you devote yourself completely and seriously to worship, you will forget about these whispers, in sha Allaah.

4. Frequently seek refuge with Allaah and make du’aa’ to free you from these whispers.

I ask Allaah to keep you safe and sound, and protect you from all evils,


Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Rasaa’il Fadeelat al-Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen, vol. 1, p. 57-60

http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/12315/shaytan whispers


I think what you're currently experiencing is whispers from shaytan. I had doubts similar to yours, until I read this book called 'Islaam's Solution for the Problems Facing Todays Youth'. It's really good, I even gave it to my brother when he was going through the same and it helped him too. So I recommend it.

 

[K-A-K]

Thanks a lot all of you. It truly means a lot to me. TTI is so welcoming.

And it seems that what i have is more than wiswaas. S: and i will try my best to look into the book. inshAllah.

i stepped out of the row but i hope that Allah SWT makes it into a blessing for me. I have learnt a lot by this experience. but if i truly do not accept islam then, surely i have lost a lot. not in this life but in hereafter.

my mental life is in a big big mess. nothing seems okay anymore. i want to live but the queries wont let me live. i live in a western country where all you hear all day long is ``Dont worry, be Happy`` or ``Live, Love, Laugh`` etc. and that sure is a big trouble on its own.

my conclusion is that evil prevails because we wanted it to prevail. we chose not to choose God over things and thus, He wouldn`t really help us. we had the free will to choose. and we chose evil. and yet out of His Mercy, He guides people.

the people who believe in Him will achieve the salvation He has promised. Whereas others, He will provide them heaven here. He didnt have to but He will out of His Justice. maybe thats why we see both evil and good; happiness and ugliness in the world today. i know its not a complete analysis, neither the most true one, but that is my deduction.

But i still pray and hope that He helps people. I hope whoever is dying today for no apparent reason gets justice in the end and whosoever is infringing on others`rights today has his rights infringed that Day. i know that sounds mean but look what they`ve turned the world into. Its a hopeless sight.. i dont want to live here anymore. i want my out.

 

[K-A-K]

Sachin4Islam

Sachin 4 Islam..

But brother, you`ve hit the jackpot. yeah, i dont feel the ikhlaas. the feeling that shakes a person from inside out. i dont feel it. and im dying to feel it. trust me i am. even if Allah SWT offers me guidance or ikhlaas at one end and my dad the bestest friend i ever had on the other, i would take Ikhlaas and guidance.. I`d rather have the true ikhlaas and the guidance. I want to be at peace. but i dont know how to take it. to feel it. to pluck it up. i just have no idea. and its sad.

thanks a lot all of you. I hope all of you stay on the guided path, ameen.

 

[Munawar]

and i want to worship Him and love Him for His sake. as in who He is.. i want to Love Him and then fear Him... loving out of fear doesn`t make sense... we would then be worshipping Him because we`re afraid of His wrath and jahannum. :S i dont want to do that. i want to love Him and want Him to love me back. i expect too much, i know, but well, we are insaan and we want to be loved. especially by the one who created us in the first place.

:salam2:
There can be three reasons to worship Allah.
1. Because you love Allah (SWT).
2. Because you want His rewards (Jannah).
3. Because you are affraid of His punishment (Jahanum).

All there are acceptable reasons in the eyes of Allah, but the best reason to worship Allah (SWT) is reason #1.
If you ask me I would say that I worship Allah (SWT) for all 3 reasons.

if Allah SWT offers me guidance or ikhlaas at one end and my dad the bestest friend i ever had on the other, i would take Ikhlaas and guidance.. I`d rather have the true ikhlaas and the guidance. I want to be at peace.

Sister, it looks like you have also hit the jackpot, but so far you are not aware of it yet. But you will be. InshaAllah... Soon...... very soon. InshaAllah.

 

[sachin4islam]

Sachin 4 Islam..

But brother, you`ve hit the jackpot. yeah, i dont feel the ikhlaas. the feeling that shakes a person from inside out. i dont feel it. and im dying to feel it. trust me i am. even if Allah SWT offers me guidance or ikhlaas at one end and my dad the bestest friend i ever had on the other, i would take Ikhlaas and guidance.. I`d rather have the true ikhlaas and the guidance. I want to be at peace. but i dont know how to take it. to feel it. to pluck it up. i just have no idea. and its sad.

thanks a lot all of you. I hope all of you stay on the guided path, ameen.

Assalamu Alaikum: Sis.

Again I will amend you a bit. Ikhlas is to be generated and it is not a feeling but a state of satisfaction and peace that yes my every act is for Allah irrespective of the fact that you are struggling in this material life. And do not forget Allah burdens a soul to the extent of its endurance only but the problem is that in absence of IKhlas we feel over burdened.

And believe me if you stretch from center of earth in all possible directions to find peace and explore Him,you will return back to Him (Islam) our Lord. I have been to this exploration. And I ended this exploration with complete submission to Him. This is Ikhlas. I do not exaggerate,I have felt it.

Regards.

 

[sachin4islam]

Assalamu Alaikum: Sis.

Few words more: Realize the uncertainty of this material world it extends from a single second to many decades. Every second is of utmost importance. So move ahead and only towards Him for InshaAllah there is a day of which He promises and that day would be of peace and salvation. This should be our desired destiny. So move ahead.

The peace you explore is there at His abode.

Regards.

 

[a_stranger]

Sachin 4 Islam..

But brother, you`ve hit the jackpot. yeah, i dont feel the ikhlaas. the feeling that shakes a person from inside out. i dont feel it. and im dying to feel it. trust me i am. even if Allah SWT offers me guidance or ikhlaas at one end and my dad the bestest friend i ever had on the other, i would take Ikhlaas and guidance.. I`d rather have the true ikhlaas and the guidance. I want to be at peace. but i dont know how to take it. to feel it. to pluck it up. i just have no idea. and its sad.

thanks a lot all of you. I hope all of you stay on the guided path, ameen.

dear sister

When you pray alone you are having ikhlaas since you are bowing to your one and only Lord, when you fast you are totally in ikhlaas you can eat or drink when no body is with you, why don t you do it you know Allah sobhanahu wa taala is watching , when you are alone and something bad is on tv you off it for the sake of Allah ......then you are winning ikhlaas.........and so on we need to train our souls to have ikhlaas .......do something for Allah alone don t tell anyone and see what you feel .........Don t let the illusion of this ending life deceive you all the pleasure of this life is coming to an end only the pleasure of faith will continue. With love and regards.

 

[kashif_nazeer]

:salam2:

Sister welcome to TTI first of all and I hope you will benefit from it inshaAllah.
Alhamdulillah,that you are having these thoughts about life,fo you wish to turn to Allah and return to Him.Your soul is yearning for Him and inshaAllah He will guide you to Him.
I cant see you,or hear you or havent met you in real life but I know you are there?How?Through our communication via internet,I analyse our communication and it makes sense,I see what you wrote and "believe" that you exist.
Similarly Allah is there He is Al Ghaib(Unseen) but He is there.
Allah announces in Qur'an about Himself:
Indeed this, your religion, is one religion, and I am your Lord, so worship Me.Surat Al-'Anbyā' [21:92]

Indeed, I am Allah . There is no deity except Me, so worship Me and establish prayer for My remembrance.Surat Ţāhā[20:14]

Hazrat Musa(alyhissalaam) expressed his desire to see Allah but Allah replied "lan taranee" "You cannot see me"
And when Musa (Moses) came at the time and place appointed by Us, and his Lord spoke to him, he said: "O my Lord! Show me (Yourself), that I may look upon You." Allah said: "You cannot see Me, but look upon the mountain if it stands still in its place then you shall see Me." So when his Lord appeared to the mountain, He made it collapse to dust, and Musa (Moses) fell down unconscious. Then when he recovered his senses he said: "Glory be to You, I turn to You in repentance and I am the first of the believers."Surat Al-'A`rāf[7:143]

Thus believers are to believe in Allah without seeing Him,it says in Surat Al Baqarah in 3rd verse:

Who believe in the unseen, establish prayer, and spend out of what We have provided for them,

Thus have peace,sister,this is the true religion and Allah is our Lord.


How do we know that He is there and He is our Lord?
Through His messages ,the last of which He sent to beloved Hazrat Muhammad ),when angel Jibraeel(alayhissalaam) descended on him in cave Hira of Jabal annur and commanded the Prophet to "READ".
Qur'an is the biggest proof of Allah's existence.
Sister I see life as a collection of events and there are good events and bad events.
Every soul will taste death. And We test you with evil and with good as trial; and to Us you will be returned.Surat Al-'Anbyā' [21:35]

Through these events we are tested as to which of us are best in deeds.

[He] who created death and life to test you [as to] which of you is best in deed - and He is the Exalted in Might, the Forgiving -Surat Al Mulk [67:2]

About struggles,a believer will always struggle and shaytaan will try to mislead him by many ways,through waswasas and temptation.He will try it to our last breath to mislead us and flown through our veins like blood but those who are firm in faith,he will have no power over them.
As he promised in Qur'an:
[Iblees] said, "By your might, I will surely mislead them allSurat Şād [38:82]

then he says:
Except, among them, Your chosen servants."Surat Şād [38:83]

So shaytaan will always try to mislead us but he will try to mislead those more,who are searching for truth,so guard yourself sister against this enemy of ours with prayer fasting and Qur'an.
I remeber one post on TTI about how shaytaan get exhasuted near a good believer.So stay on guard sister

About love and fear of Allah,it is said in Qur'an:
But those who believe are stronger in love for Allah . Surat Al-Baqarah [2:165]

Allah loves us so much that He gifted us this beautiful creation of His and our bodies,health,loving families friends,food provision,He gifted us everything to us and if we follow His guidance He will bless us with eternal joy and happiness!Jannatul Firdaus.
About Allah's love there is two hadith ,I post inshaAllah:



1)lt. is reported by a trustworthy man of the past that as he was passing through a street he saw the door of a house open. A woman came out with a child who was crying and pleading while she was pushing him out. She left him outside the house and slammed the door shut in his face. The child left the door and walked a distance. Then he stopped, looked about, began to think, and not finding any other place but his own house where he could take shelter nor anyone who would care for him as his mother would, he returned to his house dejected, sad. He found the door shut. He sat at the sill, put his cheek on the threshold and slept with tear marks on his cheeks. He was in this state when the mother opened the door. When she saw him in this state she could not control herself. She bent down, grabbed him to her bosom, began to kiss him and say in tears: "Oh my boy! My dear child! My very soul! Where were you? Didn't I tell you not to disobey me? Do my bidding, and don't force me to punish you, while I hate to do that." Then she carried the child back and closed the door behind her.

That is the story of a mother and a child: the story of disobedience, punishment, return, forgiveness and unbound love. But the Prophet, sallaAllahu alihi wasallam, has told us that , Allah loves His creation more than a woman does her child-

2) About a woman who lost her baby during a war,she frantically serached for him everywhere and she could not find him anywhere,When she found a baby amongst the prisoners, she took it in her arms, cradled it next to her chest and suckled it. So Allah's Messenger ( ) said: "Do you think that this woman would ever throw her child into the fire?" We said: 'By Allah, Never!' So he said: "Allah is more merciful to His believing servants than that mother could ever be to her child." [Bukhari (10/426) & Muslim (18/80)]


Just go to http://www.quran.com and type Allah loves in the search box and see how you can attain Allah's loves and whom He loves.Try to be like that person and Allah will love you.
We fear not only Allah's punishment but fear also involves an element of love.
When you love someone dearly,you don't want to disappoint them by diobeying them,you FEAR disappointing them would anyone like our beloved Allah to be disappointed with us and say to us on judgement day:

He will say, "Remain despised therein and do not speak to Me.[23:108] Surat Al mu'minun.
So it is also a fear out of love.

May Allah guide you and help you attain highest peak of iman and taqwa and grant you jaannah and His good pleasure.Ameen.

 

[kashif_nazeer]

dear sister

When you pray alone you are having ikhlaas since you are bowing to your one and only Lord, when you fast you are totally in ikhlaas you can eat or drink when no body is with you, why don t you do it you know Allah sobhanahu wa taala is watching , when you are alone and something bad is on tv you off it for the sake of Allah ......then you are winning ikhlaas.........and so on we need to train our souls to have ikhlaas .......do something for Allah alone don t tell anyone and see what you feel .........Don t let the illusion of this ending life deceive you all the pleasure of this life is coming to an end only the pleasure of faith will continue. With love and regards.

:salam2:
Wonderful advice ,sister mashaAllah.Indeed when we are alone we act freely,that is the moment we should try to build ikhlaas.Pray to Allah in the middle of the night in your room,when no one except Allah knows what we are doing.Fast and don't tell anyone you are fasting or let them know.Recite Qur'an when no one is watching,spend in charity so that not even our left hand knows if our right hand spent.MashaAllah this being alone with Allah and ourselves and worshipping Him and praying to Him then is one of the best ways to attain ikhlaas.

 

[Seeking Allah's Mercy]

Asalamoalaikom wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh,

Hmm I see everyone had already said what I was to say last night. . .

Let me tell you, this isn't new, you are not alone. This happens to a lot of people a lot of times. It is a test of faith. My thoughts are that what makes you think you've lost it all is Shaitan. You say it's Nafs but I can't see how?

Nafs is related to desires, Do you desire there was no Lord (Astagfirullah) so that you can have your way? Your coming here, asking for sincere advice is a proof in and of itself that you don't desire that. Shaitan is the one who gives you thoughts and doubts. And he's so smart he's landed you with the idea that you are to be blamed. Those train of thoughts that he's channeled down you head are not your fault. But you can control them by asking Allaah protection against it.

Seek refuge from this maniac. Next time it happens say it out aloud: "Aamuntu Billahi wa bi Rasoolihi". (I believe in Allaah and His messenger). You notice your thought are put to an end.

Open the Quraan, read the translation. If betting was Halal, I would have done so, that Quraan will talk to you. Make Wudhu and read it Inshaa'Allaah.

 

[K-A-K]

AssalamuAlykum brothers & sisters.

all of you are so knowledgeable mashAllah , i truly envy the peace and ikhlaas that you all have, ill try my best to attain it too.

thanks a lot for sharing your views and the support that you guys are giving is amazing. Thanks a lotttt. JazakAllah.

by nafs, i meant the psychological concept of `self` and not the desirous part. the ego butts in sometimes and we forget. i learnt that insaan in arabic comes from an arabic word that means `forgetful`. so we forget a lot and we need to return. if we don`t forget, we`d be angels anyway. its essential that we recognize our human nature and contemplate. i guess i am in the contemplation phase... struggling to really know what it means to be here... i never gave it a thought for i was always occupied by one thing or another in this life... friends, family, etc. it was an illusion that i was in. and was trying my best to stick to it.

i always thought all the Holy Qurans were dittos from day 1. i mean no difference at all. but there were some variants... and you know how orientalists are... they attack it a lot and somehow my weak side got the better of me. i was so hurt to know that. nobody ever told me that there were variants... due to the lack of diacritic marks. and when youre out of your teens and you get to know a thing that wasnt true at all... its too heartbreaking. and i completely lost it. i t felt that i had been betrayed. :S but with time AlhamduLillah i realized that it wasnt a big issue. the message did not change. Allah SWT promised that the message would not change. and it hasn`t. but still i mean ... im still young and it really hurt. and i was the only one facing it. with all the questions racking my brain. the confrontation was pretty disturbing. and then again how people talk about contradictions in the Quran. its hard for people like me who have no prior idea about the entire content and the its literal discourse, its hard to understand. and then i didnt want to share it with my family.. didnt want to trouble them... people love attacking islam as much as they can. and amateur students completely lose it.

but well, i tried to make sense of things.. i haven`t solved everything but i`m trying. i hope that Allah SWT will make those alleged errors easy for me as He says that its on Him to explain the ayahs. im counting on it and AlhamduLillah, im trying to combat the troubles as much as i can. it is HARD but nothing is easy.

thanks a lot everyone. each word means a lot to me and i will try my best to inculcate your advice in my life. and i agree, The Quran at times talks back and makes a person look into oneself. i dont know why it dooesn`t effect other people. i don`t have an answer to this one yet.

JazakAllah people. you guys are amazing! mashAllah

 

[ditta]

Wa-alaykum-us-Salaam wa'Rahmatullaah,

First, welcome to the forum sister.

Second, Alhamdu'lillaah the brothers and sisters in your thread have provided good advices.

Third, it appears clear from your posts that your looking for a connection with Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala). With Allah's help we can establish this connection with Allah by looking at the Qur'aan and Sunnah or Allah's signs in the Universe.

The post link below will Insha'Allaah help you to achieve some peace. It shows how to connect hearts to Allah (Subhanaahu wa ta'aala).

http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?p=362072#post362072

I would like to include a few portions in this thread and Alhamdu'lillaah I think it is a lovely read for our hearts:

iv) Those who benefit from the signs of the universe are those who have insight

The signs of Allah in the universe only become clear in all their inspiring reality to hearts which remember and worship Allah, because all veils have been removed from these hearts and they are open to the wonders of the universe. The Qur’aan establishes this connection between human hearts and the rhythm of this immense and beautiful universe. This connection creates the insight that discovers the universe anew. This insight and discovery leave great impact on the human hearts and become so precious in the lives of the mankind. This connection is established by the Qur’aan between understanding, learning and the man who learns and understands. Hence the Qur’aan states that those who are guided by the signs of the universe are a certain type of people:

Verily! In the creation of the heavens and the earth, and in the alternation of night and day, there are indeed signs for men of understanding.

Those who remember Allah (always, and in prayers) standing, sitting, and lying down on their sides, and think deeply about the creation of the heavens and the earth, (saying): ‘Our Lord! You have not created (all) this without purpose, glory to You! (Exalted are You above all that they associate with You as partners). Give us salvation from the torment of the Fire.’

(Qur’aan 3: 190-191)

These are the people who benefit from the signs of the universe, because they do not stop at the limit of the physical things that they can see; rather they look to the Hand that is running the universe and the Power that created it. They use their eyes, ears and minds in the best way in this matter, and they follow the guidance of the aayaat of the Qur’aan, which help the ears, eyes and mind to understand the best that man can ever understand:

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.

And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colours. Verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge. And among His Signs is your sleep by night and by day, and your seeking of His Bounty. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who listen.

And among His Signs is that He shows you the lightning, for fear and for hope, and He sends down water (rain) from the sky, and therewith revives the earth after its death. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who understand.

(Qur’aan 30: 21-24)

So the signs become clear to those who ponder, listen and have understanding in the right direction and lead them to their objective.
The kuffaar (disbelievers), on the other hand, look at what happens, and their thoughts do not go beyond it, to the Creator. They do not understand the wisdom behind creation.

They know only the outside appearance of the life of the world (i.e. the matters of their livelihood, like irrigating or sowing or reaping, etc.),...

(Qur’aan 30: 7)

The disbelievers do not benefit from the universal signs, because they do not look at them through the lens of the Qur’aan:

Say: “Behold all that is in the heavens and the earth,” but neither Aayaat nor warners benefit those who believe not.

(Qur’aan 10: 101)

The Qur’aan denounces the disbelievers and the deniers for failing to look and learn:

Do they not look in the dominion of the heavens and the earth and all things that Allah has created; and that it may be that the end of their lives is near. In what message after this will they then believe?

(Qur’aan 7: 185)


Listen to these aayaat (verses) and then ponder the ending of each aayah:

He has created the heavens and the earth with truth. He makes the night to go in the day and makes the day to go in the night. And He has subjected the sun and the moon. Each running (on a fixed course) for an appointed term. Verily, He is the All-Mighty, the Oft-Forgiving.

He created you (all) from a single person (Adam); then made from him his wife (Hawwa’ (Eve)). And He has sent down for you of cattle eight pairs (of the sheep, two, male and female; of the goats, two, male and female; of the oxen, two, male and female; and of the camels, two, male and female). He creates you in the wombs of your mothers, creation after creation in three veils of darkness. Such is Allah your Lord. His is the kingdom. Laa ilaaha illa Huwa (none has the right to be worshipped but He). How then are you turned away?

(Qur’aan 39: 5-6)

Knowing Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala) from the Qur'aan and Sunnah in that thread is a really helpful read. It will Insha'Allaah strengthen your faith, give you clarity (i.e., who you are worshipping). That section starts from post #84.

When reading your posts I just had this inclination of something (that I won't mention). I just felt that the portion could help:

2 – The True Worshipper is the One who Alternates between Fear and Hope

True worship is that in which a person alternates between loving Allah and fearing Him, humbling himself before Him, putting his hope in Him and seeking His mercy.

The person whose worship does not stem from love, fear or hope is simply making meaningless movements which are of no significance.

The person who worships out of love but without humility, fear or hope often falls into sin and obedience. He claims that he loves Allah but he neglects good deeds and commits sins in an audacious manner. A long time ago, some people claimed to love Allah but they did not do good deeds, so Allah (subhaanahu wa ta’aala) put them to the test by saying:

Say (O’ Muhammad to mankind): ‘If you (really) love Allah, then follow me (i.e. accept Islamic Monotheism, follow the Qur’aan and the Sunnah), Allah will love you...

(Qur’aan 3: 31)

So whoever claims to love Allah but does not follow His Messenger is lying.

Imam Shaafa’i (may Allah have mercy on him) said: If you see a man walking on the water or flying through the air, do not believe him unless you know whether he is following the Messenger of Allah.

Similarly, if there is hope on its own, unaccompanied by fear of Allah, a person may audaciously disobey Allah and feel secure against His Plan:

...None feels secure from the Plan of Allah except the people who are the losers.

(Qur’aan 7: 99)

If fear is not accompanied by hope, a person may think in negative terms of Allah, despairing of His mercy and compassion. Allah (subhaanahu wa ta’aala), says:

...Certainly no one despairs of Allah’s Mercy, except the people who disbelieve.

(Qur’aan 12: 87)

True worship is that in which a person is in a state between fear and hope:

...And they (‘Eesa (Jesus), ‘Uzair (Ezra), angels and others) hope for His Mercy and fear His Torment...

(Qur’aan 17: 57)

Is one who is obedient to Allah, prostrating himself or standing (in prayer) during the hours of the night, fearing the Hereafter and hoping for the Mercy of his Lord (like one who disbelieves)?...

(Qur’aan 39: 9)

And he should be in a state between hope and fear, as Allah (subhaanahu wa ta’aala), said concerning the family of Zakariya (Zachariya) (upon whom be peace):

...Verily, they used to hasten on to do good deeds and they used to call on Us with hope and fear, and used to humble themselves before Us.

(Qur’aan 21: 90)

The righteous slave will sometimes be filled with hope, so that he almost soars with his longing for Allah (subhaanahu wa ta’aala), and sometimes will be seized with such fear, that he almost melts with fear of Allah. He persistently seeks the pleasure of Allah, turning to Him out of fear of His punishment, seeking refuge with Him from it, and seeking that which is with Him (i.e. Paradise).

Although the portion below is at the start of the thread I linked above I decided to place it here:

6) The Importance and Necessity of Islamic Aqeedah

The Islamic aqeedah is as essential for man as water and air. Without this aqeedah he is lost and confused. The Islamic aqeedah is the only one which answer the questions that have always preoccupied man and still preoccupy human thought and cause frustration:

Where did I come from?

Where did the universe come from?

Who is the Creator?

What are His attributes and names?

Why did He create us and the universe?

What is our role in this universe?

What is our relationship to the Creator who created us?

Are there other, invisible worlds beyond the world that we can see?

Are there other intelligent beings apart from man?

Is there another life after this life?

If the answer is positive, what is that other life like?

There is no other belief today, apart from the aqeedah of Islam, that can answer these questions in a true and convincing way. Everyone who does not know or believe in this aqeedah is like that miserable poet who knows nothing of it.

His name is Eeliya Abu Maadi; the couplets quoted come from his lengthy poem entitled At-Talaasim (mysteries), from his collection of poems entitled Al-Jadaawil (streams), Pp. 106

He says:

I came, I know not from whence, but I came
I saw before me a path, so I followed it
And I shall continue to tread this path, whether I like it or not
Where did I come from? How did I find this path?

I know not

Am I new or ancient in the universe?
Am I free, or a prisoner in chains?
Am I controlling my own fate in this life, or am I controlled?
How I wish I knew, but

I know not

My path, what is my path? Is it long or short?
Am I ascending, or descending?
Am I running through this life, or is it life that is running?
Or are we both standing still, whilst time runs?

I know not

I wonder, when I was in that unseen, secure world,
Did I know that I was hidden there
And that I would emerge and come into being?
Or, I wonder, did I not know a thing?

I know not

I wonder, before I became a complete human being,
Was I non-existent, or was I something possible, or was I something?
Is there an answer to this mystery? Or will I remain forever
Not knowing... why I don’t know?

I know not

What confusion is this! What anxiety this uncertainty brings to human souls!

Do the children of this generation, who have missed out on knowledge of the “great universal” facts” without which their lives cannot be sound and healthy, deserve to suffer these worries which fill their hearts and cause pain and complexes? Compare their situation to that of the Muslim who knows for certain all of these facts, and through them finds comfort and peace of mind. So he travels on a straight path towards a definite goal whose features are known.

The answers to the above questions will Insha'Allaah be found in that thread. Forgive me for copying and pasting these rather lengthy portions. I did so, because I felt they were helpful excerpts that with Allah's Help will allow us to achieve some peace (I always love re-reading them because it helps my heart). Forgive me if I have misunderstood your posts and if what I have posted does not relate to what you said. May Allah (Subhaanahu wa ta'aala) bless us with beneficial knowledge. Ameen.

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2:
Wonderful advice ,sister mashaAllah.Indeed when we are alone we act freely,that is the moment we should try to build ikhlaas.Pray to Allah in the middle of the night in your room,when no one except Allah knows what we are doing.Fast and don't tell anyone you are fasting or let them know.Recite Qur'an when no one is watching,spend in charity so that not even our left hand knows if our right hand spent.MashaAllah this being alone with Allah and ourselves and worshipping Him and praying to Him then is one of the best ways to attain ikhlaas.

:salam2:

Sometimes Satan tries his best to put us in doubts and sadness while following Islam as it is ......with a heart is enough to stop the wiswas and the evils of Satan
as long as a muslem is following prophet Mohammad sale Allahu alaihi wa sallam in his life then he is inshaAllah on a straight path. AlhamduliAllah Islam is so straight so simple , if we read Quran then all our questions and doubts
will be cleared , like a light showing us the way.

But we should continue too pray with heart and study Quran and Hadith otherwise ibleas will come to play.