for women

[iislam4ever]

Allaah has cursed women who frequent graves," related by Ahmed and Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah and in one version, and Tirmidhi and Ibn Maajah and in one version,

"Allaah has cursed women who visit graves and those who build mosques and place lights upon them." (related by Abu Dawood, al-Tirmidhi, al-Nisaa'i and al-Haakim)

Visiting graveyards: It is narrated on the authority of Buraydah (may Allah be
pleased with him) who said that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa salam said: "I used to prohibit you from visiting graves, so visit them now..."
[Muslim 2260]

This condemnation would warrant the validity of the argument against women visiting cemeteries as the lawmaker (i.e. Allaah) would not condemn something that is permissible or reprehensible—only that which is forbidden completely.
Regarding what would be the reason for this condemnation, the scholars have cited two main arguments:

Firstly, that women for the most part are emotionally weaker in accepting calamities and perhaps being in sight of her dear one's graves may break into wailing and loud weeping, which would be detrimental to her religious character and harmful for her body as well.

Secondly, cemeteries are oftentimes isolated places which may not be safe for someone being alone, possibly exposing a woman to people of corrupt or loose moral character.

In summary, the rationale behind this prohibition is that women are often not as strong emotionally in the face of calamities, and not visiting graves prevents them from the trial and from being exposed to unnecessary fitnah.

Allaah the Most Knowledgeable knows what is most correct and best.

 

[Sister S]

:salam2

Jazakh Allah for the post.

i've never visited graves but I know some women who do. 1 woman is what you call an alimah. And she was asked are we allowed to visit graves.
She replied that women are allowed to visit graves as long as they
dont start crying out aloud.

I thought OK maybe shes right. But now i know she's not.

Jazakh Allah again for the post.

 

[hager]

thx

salam...
thx for ur post sister..
i asked my father to visit my grandpa..and go to graves..
he refused..
he said,i'm still young..i respect his desicion..
my mom,dad....asks me ,when they die..
never wear black
never cry..
live my life...as nothing happen..
cuz,they always remind me,that death's good not bad as ppls think..
that's all,i think i'm talkative..
thx for ur post,
salam

 

[tulipflower777]

:salam2:

Jazazkallahu khairan! that was a nice thread...

may Allah reward you . ameen:tti_sister:

 

[ShyHijabi]

Salaam,

While it is true that women were forbidden to visit graves in teh early days of Islam that rule was chnaged by Prophet Mohamed (peace be upon him).

Scholars of Islam, As-Salamu `alaykum. Are women permitted to visit the graves of their parents and other relatives? I heard some scholars say that they are not permitted to do so, but I don’t know if they have any proofs for such a view. My own understanding is that `A’ishah, the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) visited her brother’s grave. Can you comment on this issue?


Wa `alaykum As-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.


In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.



All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Sister, thank you for your question, which emanates from a thoughtful heart. May Allah Almighty help us all adhere to the principles of this true religion, Islam, and make us among the dwellers of Paradise in the Hereafter. Ameen.

Generally speaking, visiting graves is permissible for the purpose of being admonished by remembering death and the Hereafter. However, Islamic ethics and morals should be considered.

In response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

“Visiting graves for women and men was prohibited in the early days of Islam. This was due to the fact that there were reasonable grounds for suspicion that the Arabs, newly converted to Islam and fresh from paganism, might associate the right to visit graves with grave worship rituals.

When the Islamic concept of Tawhid (Oneness of Allah) became deeply entrenched in the Islamic consciousness, there was no reasonable ground for such suspicions. Accordingly, the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) lifted the above ban. He then went a step further by making grave visitations a recommended practice because of the associated benefits. He said: “In the past I have forbidden you from visiting graves, but now you may do so, for it might remind you of the next world.” (Reported by Ibn Majah)

As the above statement of the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) is stated in general terms, scholars disagreed as to its precise interpretation. One group thought that the permission was general to include both men and women, since the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) never indicated that the permission had been limited only to men.

A second group, however, said that women were excluded from the above permission and according to them women are forbidden to visit graves. They supported their view by another statement of the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him): “Allah has cursed women who frequent graves for visitation.” (Reported by At-Tirmidhi)

The first group cited a number of traditions in support of their view that women are permitted to visit graves. One of them is the report in Al-Bukhari’s Sahih, which states that once the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) saw a woman weeping over a grave. He advised her to exercise patience. It is not stated anywhere that he told her it was forbidden for women to visit graves. It is only reasonable to assume that had visiting graves been haram (prohibited) for women, the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) would have clearly stated so in this case.

As for the hadith that the second group cited to support their view, the first group explained that it was aimed at women who frequent graves for wailing and lamenting.

The above explanation seems more plausible when we take into account the fact that pagan Arabs were in the habit of hiring professionals — who were mostly women — to practice the ritual of wailing and lamenting on the graves.

The view of the first group is further confirmed by the report from `A’ishah. When someone objected to her about her visit to her brother’s grave, she said that the prohibition was in the early days of Islam and that the Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) had later allowed it. A similar view has been attributed to Umm `Atiyyah who said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings be on him) had never firmly prohibited women from visiting graves.”

In conclusion, let us say that the issue of women visiting graves has been debated by scholars of the past. After having reviewed the various traditions in this respect, Imam Al-Qurtubi concluded that women are permitted to visit graves on condition that they refrain from wailing and lamenting. Both Imam Ibn Hajar and Ash-Shawkani, both of whom who were thoroughly grounded in the science of Hadith, also tend to favor this view.”

(Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: www.islam.ca)



If you are still in need of more information, don't hesitate to contact us. Do keep in touch. May Allah guide us all to the straight path!



Allah Almighty knows best.

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/Satellite?pagename=IslamOnline-English-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503546734

Wasalaam

~Sarah

 

[jabba]

YES, we can visit graves

:salam2:

Fiqh-us-Sunnah
Fiqh 4.85
Can Women Visit Graves
Imam Malik and some Hanafi scholars, and, according to one report from Ahmad, most of the scholars hold it permissible for women to visit graves. This is based on the following hadith from 'Aishah, "What should I say to them, O Messenger of Allah when visiting graves?" As mentioned above Abdallah ibn Abi Mulaikah is also reported to have said, "Once 'Aishah returned after visiting the graveyard. I asked, 'O Mother of the Believers, where have you been?' She said: 'I went out to visit the grave of my brother Abd ar-Rahman.' I asked her: 'Didn't the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, prohibit visiting graves?' She said, 'Yes, he did forbid visiting graves during the early days, but later on he ordered us to visit them'." This is reported by Al-Hakim and Al-Baihaqi, who also remarked that this hadith was narrated only by Bistam bin Muslim al-Basri. Adh-Dhahabi said that it is a sound hadith.
Anas reported: "The Prophet, peace be upon him, saw a woman crying by the grave of her son, and said to her, 'Fear Allah, and be patient.' She replied, 'What do you care about my tragedy?' When he went away, someone told her, 'Indeed, that was the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him. ' The woman felt extremely sorry and she immediately went to the Prophet's house, where she did not find any guards. She called out: 'O Messenger of Allah! I did not recognize you.' The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, 'Verily patience is needed at the time of the first affiction'.'' (Bukhari and Muslim) This supports the argument in favor of the permissibility of women visiting graves, for the Prophet, peace be upon him, saw her at the grave and did not show his disapproval of it.
The purpose of visiting graves is to remember the Hereafter, which is something that both men and women need. Men are by no means more in need of this reminder than women. Some scholars disliked it for women to visit graves as they are less patient and too emotional. The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, "May Allah curse the women who are frequent visitors of the graves." (Reported by Ahmad, Ibn Majah, and Tirmidhi, who said that it is a sound hadith)
Al-Qurtubi said: "The curse mentioned in this hadith applies only to those women who visit graves frequently. The reason for this curse lies perhaps in the fact that it involves infringement of the rights of the husband, and leads to adornment and exhibition of their beauty to strangers, and shouting, yelling, and other similar things." It may be said that, "If no such harm is feared from women visiting graves, then there is no valid reason for preventing them from visiting graves, for indeed remembrance of death is something that both men and women equally need." Commenting on Al-Qurtubi's view, Ash-Shawkani said, "This statement may form the basis for reconciling apparently contradictory hadith."