The Best of Women
"A Bedouin was asked about women, and being man who was experienced with them, he said: 'The best of woman is the tallest when she stands, the most prominent when she sits and the most truthful when she speaks.
She is the one whose anger subsides quickly, and whose laugh is a beautiful smile. When she does anything, she does it well. She obeys her husband and adheres to her home. She is honored among her people, yet insignificant in her own mind-affectionate and fertile, and all of her affair is good." (P 174)
Personal Comment: There are eleven characteristics here with a twelfth and thirteenth sub themes.
The first of the two sub themes is that the speaker is NOT the Prophet (SAW), a Companion of the Prophet (SAW) by name at least and may also not have been a Muslim either. This diminishes his significance and importance to a certain degree, but once we are past that we can start looking at what he actually said and examing them carefully.
The second sub theme is even where we can and wish to disagree with aspects of his assessment, by looking at the possible positive traits of his characterisation what will the outcomes be for the woman and her immediate family/colleagues who fits into the categories he circumscribes for her.
The first three characteristics refer not specifically to height and status alone but also to the possession of a positive and confident nature and personality, the inner feelings of the heart and personal strength in what must be said and done even in the face of possible opposition by others (as long as it is in accordance with and for Islam) and for representing the correct and true perspective irrespective of being in the minority or with potential consequences.
The next three characteristics refers to her femininity and modesty as a woman. Allah crerated her as a woman and she should be proud of her gender, what distinguishes her from a man as a woman and how she deals with each of those qualities and attributes both among her family, friends and society in general.
The two traits that follows represent her position within the family and the immense rewards associated with both assuming that role, not suppressing it and fulfilling the objectives and needs of a woman as a wife and queen of the home.
Where no one else may sympathise with the social condition and hardship of maintaining a home, listening to and attending to the demands of the members of the household and continue with keeping the home as it should be, Allah is aware of it and will hugely and enormously honour women that do so in the afterlife for a job that has no real salary but is permanently fulfilled day in day out.
The last three are a conclusion to the holistic qualities of a female believer and the ideal society in which she lives and should live in. The society in which she lives does not believe in exploiting her sexuality (i.e. prostitution, call girls, escorts, public nudity etc.). They honour her as an equal member of the human race and not as a sexual object of physical attraction for male pleasure either on a public or private platform.
As a believer, she believes in the right to speak, the right to address a condition or reality, to right a wrong, to be a model to others, to put herself forward where there is a need to stand up for something but recognises them to be necessary components of being a Muslim and hence does not attach self importance to them herself but instead accepts if she has any good in her, they are from Allah and humbles herself to Him and continues to aspire to be better both to please Him and to be more productive for her own akhirah as well as to her family/peers and society in general. In short she is not doing anything out of the ordinary not unexpected of a true female believer in the eyes of Allah. If she fulfils the above criterion then all of her affairs will be nothing but good in every way, especially as Allah will guide her all the way until she is ready to meet Him and collect her rewards as a loyal believer and everything a woman should be.
