aam_tabish
New Member
My name is Dr Ali Mustafa from Nottingham. Iam wandering if someone give me a contact email or no of a new muslim sister from UK or France.
Jaza-ku-Mullaha
Jaza-ku-Mullaha
Hi Is there new muslim sister
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The Abbasy
New Member
Umm...:salam2:
Welcome to the TurntoIslam forum. Enjoy.
P.S.:Is this even allowed?(about what he asked, Im new I dont know)
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as-salaamu `alaykum. Can you please make clear what you are requesting. If you're asking for details for sisters so you can speak to them, for whatever purpose it may be, then we cannot do this, we respect the privacy, honour and chastity of our dear sisters on this site.
Muhammad_A
Penguin fancier
You know, the sisters here have got to lose their chastity sometime; they're not Nuns.
I think it should be up to the sisters to decide whether or not they're open to approaches vis a vis marriage rather than the issue being decided for them. They don't all have cousins in South Asia.
Akhi, read what you have said, the Muslims women are better than nuns in preserving their chastity, there is no getting loose and talking to men in Islaam, except in necessary situations. As for marriage, it is clear that private conversation between man and women without her guardian is disallowed, as i said before except when necessary. So due to this, we do not support or promote (giving details to one another for a pm session). I'm not deciding for them, I'm saying that the approach is haraam. So we want to avoid at all costs. If two individuals pm eachother, that is their business but we don't want them publicly requesting details of members of the other sex, and using our forums as the exchange of details.
However at this forum, those "couples" or people in relationships receive help from us; to direct them to what is best for them, in an easy and befitting manner, without any harshness inshaa' Allaah. So if people are in a situation we are happy to help our dear brothers and sisters (just as some of us were helped in the past). However we will not, i repeat, WILL NOT distribute contact details to one another for that purpose. There are plenty of matrimonal sites out there, this is a discussion/da`wah forum, so lets keep things within fair limits.
Peace2u
Turn To Islam
Salam alai kum bro and welcome to TTI
I hope you do enjoy your stay here Inshallah.
Unfortunately bro this isn't a dating or Muslim matrimony site, we do not use TTI for match making. I assume your intensions are one of marriage I make dua you find a suitable Muslimah Inshallah.
Peace2u
Muhammad_A
Penguin fancier
But it isn't their private business because it's already been stated on these forums that Private Messages aren't.
If a sister is open to brothers asking for her Wali's contact details and the brothers are willing to conduct themselves in the correct manner then what's the harm? If things get out of hand the mods can step in and take the necessary action.
All I'm saying is there shouldn't be a blanket assumption that all unmarried sisters on these boards are just waiting for an arranged marriage to some cousin in the homeland. Or whatever. Ditto for the brothers.
If a sister is open to brothers asking for her Wali's contact details and the brothers are willing to conduct themselves in the correct manner then what's the harm? If things get out of hand the mods can step in and take the necessary action.
All I'm saying is there shouldn't be a blanket assumption that all unmarried sisters on these boards are just waiting for an arranged marriage to some cousin in the homeland. Or whatever. Ditto for the brothers.
Yaa Dr. Ali, feel free to contribute in the forums, and we make du`aa that you find a righteous spouse (if that is what you want). But as some have already said, this is not a matrimonial service. So your request cannot be granted. I hope you understand this and the reasons why, we do not want to be responsible in case things go bad.
What are you on about, I didn't say or imply that at all!? Yes, that is correct the walis details should be the request. However if a sister is interested then let her pm her wali details to the user. The correct manner is to speak in the presence of the wali/wakeel, and I know how destructive some marriages have been where this wasn't the case. A marriage should be blessed and based upon obedience from the start.
There is nothing to argue here I don't know where south Asia and cousins came into it, in fact you mentioned it whilst it was totally absent of every other post.
One last note, Shaykh Bakr Aboo Zayd in a book on etiquettes spoke about how a man loses his honour and masculinity in certain instances. One of those is to speak directly to females under the nose of their wakeel (heard in a dars by Umar Jamaykee, on the book). I ask Allaah that he raises our honour and rank in his site, and guides us to the correct conduct, ameen.
Anyway, point said and done, we've come to agree on the sunnah, which is the presence of a wakeel/walee, and maybe you thought I indicated cousins and south asians but I didn't, I shun that culture greatly lol.
And since we cannot fulfill the request of Dr. Alee, and we may only end up in pointless debate, thread closed. Dr. Ali if you feel I haven't understood the matter, then PM me inshaa' Allaah.
Wa`alaykum us-salaam
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