how MYSPACE upset me today

[nyerekareem]

:salam2:
there’s an old spanish saying that goes like this: tell me who your friends are and i’ll tell you who you are. i never really thought about that saying before, but today at nearly 30 years old; i now see how true that is.

now, i know that there is debate amongst muslims as to whether or not MYSPACE is halal or haram, but i have an account with MYSPACE that i rarely visit; and i was interested in meeting more muslim friends through the networking site. as a muslim my main preference for who i associate are muslims. not that i don’t have non-muslim friends, but i can’t stay or grow strong in my deen with them. which is what i really need most in my life. so naturally, i went to the site’s search engine and searched for muslim men to become friends with that were near my area. i was hoping to get to know them and become friends and to grow together in our deen and be supportive of one another as brothers in islam.

not surprisingly, there were several hundred people in the the search results. one by one, for the most part; i was surprised to see the things that i had saw. there were images of half naked women, alcoholic beverage consumption, filthy rap music; in other words: everything that was contrary to the way of islam. you may or may not have visited the site before, but people list information about their marital status, education, zodiac sign, sexual orientation, and religion. since, i searched for people that were muslims, each and every person that came in the results identified themselves as muslims. i began to wonder, how can they have these things on their pages and claim to be muslim? what image are they presenting to the non-muslims? if they’re doing the things of the unbelievers, how can they convince anyone of the HAQQ ( TRUTH ) of islam?

still being shocked about the individual profiles that i searched; i also checked out who were on their friends list. not surprisingly, they were almost all of the same or a bit worse. so i began to wonder, you’re a muslim and you have friends like this? now, i’m not saying that none of these people aren’t muslim, but some have to really step back and check their deen. this is why i mentioned that old spanish saying earlier. if you’re going to be a muslim, living in a non muslim society that still questions our every move; you gotta represent the religion better. try to represent our deen according to the ways of the quran and sunnah.

i remind myself before i remind others.

nyere kareem

 

[~Ali_]

Assalamualaikum brother, try going on bebo...its unfortunately the same everywhere... even sometimes in our own household.
Its sad... very very sad.

Walaikumasalam.

 

[nyerekareem]

Assalamualaikum brother, try going on bebo...its unfortunately the same everywhere... even sometimes in our own household.
Its sad... very very sad.

Walaikumasalam.

:salam2:

bebo? i never heard of it before. it's funny because in spanish bebo means I DRINK. LOL

 

[shichemlydia]

right

salam alikoum,
i share you exactelly the same opinion, it happened to me on facebook.com, i was searching for muslims, i found a group calling themselves" together to honor the prophet mohamed pbuoh" i thought it is good let's see who are there, i found what you found, women without hijab men with their girl friends.....i said look these are the people who are going to rise the words of allah swt. then i let the website.

wa salam alikoum

 

[sal12]

:salam2:
there’s an old spanish saying that goes like this: tell me who your friends are and i’ll tell you who you are. i never really thought about that saying before, but today at nearly 30 years old; i now see how true that is.

now, i know that there is debate amongst muslims as to whether or not MYSPACE is halal or haram, but i have an account with MYSPACE that i rarely visit; and i was interested in meeting more muslim friends through the networking site. as a muslim my main preference for who i associate are muslims. not that i don’t have non-muslim friends, but i can’t stay or grow strong in my deen with them. which is what i really need most in my life. so naturally, i went to the site’s search engine and searched for muslim men to become friends with that were near my area. i was hoping to get to know them and become friends and to grow together in our deen and be supportive of one another as brothers in islam.

not surprisingly, there were several hundred people in the the search results. one by one, for the most part; i was surprised to see the things that i had saw. there were images of half naked women, alcoholic beverage consumption, filthy rap music; in other words: everything that was contrary to the way of islam. you may or may not have visited the site before, but people list information about their marital status, education, zodiac sign, sexual orientation, and religion. since, i searched for people that were muslims, each and every person that came in the results identified themselves as muslims. i began to wonder, how can they have these things on their pages and claim to be muslim? what image are they presenting to the non-muslims? if they’re doing the things of the unbelievers, how can they convince anyone of the HAQQ ( TRUTH ) of islam?

still being shocked about the individual profiles that i searched; i also checked out who were on their friends list. not surprisingly, they were almost all of the same or a bit worse. so i began to wonder, you’re a muslim and you have friends like this? now, i’m not saying that none of these people aren’t muslim, but some have to really step back and check their deen. this is why i mentioned that old spanish saying earlier. if you’re going to be a muslim, living in a non muslim society that still questions our every move; you gotta represent the religion better. try to represent our deen according to the ways of the quran and sunnah.

i remind myself before i remind others.

nyere kareem

The whole friends quote isn't always true. In most cases it is but not always. For example I have 3 best friends, one who sleeps with her boyfriend and drinks alcohol, the other who has had a non-muslim boyfriend and another who has had 3 boyfriends and is now in a relationship. I've never had a boyfriend,never drank, never been to a club etc. I'm not saying I'm a great Muslim, far from it but I'm nothing like my friends only because I fear Allah more than they do. The only thing that makes us similar is our humour and we have a laugh when we are together. You may be shocked at how I can associate with them but these girls know about Islam almost as much as I do and they have other good characteristics such as they're really forgiving, they don't like to backbite, they're not judgemental, they're kind and helpful etc. I'm saying the West has really influenced A LOT of Muslims like my friends and we can only pray to Allah to guide them to the straight path but I wouldn't stop speaking to them or anything like that because what if they want to turn to Allah one day out of the blue and need some help from a friend? This has actually happened a couple of times and they asked me to help them pray regularly and tell them more about Islam etc so I was there for them. They just got bored and got back into their normal ways. It is quite hard for me sometimes when my imaan decreases because I can't really talk to anyone so I turn to the internet to listen to talks! But I wouldn't judge those Muslims on facebook,and myspace etc because one day they may change drastically.

 

[Mahzala]

Assalamualaikum



Brother NyereKareem, I know exactly what you mean, and I agree with you wholeheartedly. Like Sister Sal12 said though, about the saying that you mentioned, it is true in a way, but not entirely. I, myself, have friends, each of whom have 'experienced' from the smallest to biggest sins in life, yet I dont see myself anything like them. I also have non Muslim friends, who, obviously, 'experience' for them is norm, yet no way have I slipped into anything Alhamdulillah, and its all from Allah.

But I will agree that these websites are leading the youth astray. Facebook, MySpace, Tagged, and all that jazz, they are destructive sites (well obviously depends on how you use it) for youth, whether male or female. If we look at just how much time is wasted on them let alone, everything else. How constantly we are checking for updates (I personally have no idea about them, as I have been nowhere near them, so my knowledge in this area isnt quite good, I am just recalling sitting next to friends who are so indulgded in these sites) and posting and replying back, to what, to comments and photos of each other. And what about the girls, Muslim girls who display themselves, what are they doing? Trying to find the perfect match? Or impress anyone and everyone? Its big time personal information that you are putting out there, and is available to everyone. Why would you do that?

These are those Muslims who have let Islam float around them, at the back of their minds, brushing it all off. There are some, who even if they have misguided friends, can hold themsleves back, be firm and say no, then there are others, who give in very quickly, and thats the sad part. Everyone is different. But it all lies within the Glorious Hands of Almighty Allah, Whomever He guides, none can Misguide and whomever He Misguides, none can Guide. But we ask for His Guidance, Mercy and Forgiveness always.

Assalamualaikum

 

[meer suhail]

Asalam o Alykum
well bro ,some how once i ended up in some girls page and saw she was muslim i was shocked ,,,,the dress and the filthy picture and all that ,,then i went and searched to muslim women ,,,, well what came up was unbelivable for me ,,all the females said muslims ,there dress ,pics with men wrapped around their body ,etc etc ,,,,Astgfirullah ,,and there was much more ,,,,,,,and it went on for pages and pages ,,,
well one thing interesting i noticed was most of them were africans by ethnicity ,
so yeah was quite a shock

 

[zainsmommy]

:salam2:
if you’re going to be a muslim, living in a non muslim society that still questions our every move; you gotta represent the religion better. try to represent our deen according to the ways of the quran and sunnah.

i remind myself before i remind others.
nyere kareem

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! It's what I feel ALL the time. It is SO HARD for me sometimes to seperate Islam from it's followers. I try, believe me, I DO...but I just get caught up in it. I wish more people would see how much of an INFLUENCE they have on those just finding out about this beautiful religion and those lost souls who are searching for it and happen to stumble upon it.

I have only family on mine aside from three people who are my friends. I tried to do the same as you, reach out to other Muslimahs...that was a JOKE! Just doing a search of Muslim women will leave you walking away with your mouth dropped open. It's so pathetic! I feel ashamed for them, and it's not even me?!

Assalamu Aleikom

 

[soeurette]

Why?

Not that I'm defending anyones behaviour, but this is exactly why I'm completely disillusioned with muslims, ok your shocked by some of the behaviours of some of our brothers and sisters but why is it muslims insist on going around like public criers sharing the sins of other people, isn't that just as bad as backbiting?
Secondly its not like we have exactly made Islam exciting for kids growing up in a culture thats all about a fast and exciting life, so maybe instead of coming here and say look what I found look what I found, we should be discussing ways to provide alternatives for our youths wherever we live.
I'm sorry if I seem harsh but I am tired of people preaching left right and centre about being good muslims but are ready to proclaim the wrongdoings of others.

 

[Muslimah-S]

:salam2:

Ultimately- "If you seek a perfect friend, you will be friendless."

Therefore seek a freind that is near to perfection and piety and, be yourself a role model, so then they can follow your example to come closer to Allah. Be a good companion.

Prophet Muhammad Salla Allahu ta'ala 'alayhi wa Sallam said: "The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows. So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him. (Muslim)

Allah says in interpretaion meaning:
"Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah)." [43:67]

 

[stiks]

i cant be asked to visit these 'social' whatever sites. waste of precious time, rather spend it on TTI

 

[Asja]

Assalamu Allaicomu dear brother.

Alhadmulillah I am not member and I will never be member on these sites,becasue they are Unislamic,shmaefull,and emberessing where are also Unbelivers with only Muslim names Astagfirullah,and I pray to Allah that He Inshallah protect all Muslims from these kind of places

But Alhadmulillah we do not need to worry for anything,because Allahs reword or punishment will come for anyone who desevre it,Ameen.

And Non Muslims and those who are going against Allahs Low can not be our freinds,SubhanAllah.

And we have to open thier sins Alhadmulillah,and it is our duty Alhamdulillah like Muslims,and the on the end Allahs sees everything so none can not escape from Allah,subhan we tela.

 

[sal12]

Not that I'm defending anyones behaviour, but this is exactly why I'm completely disillusioned with muslims, ok your shocked by some of the behaviours of some of our brothers and sisters but why is it muslims insist on going around like public criers sharing the sins of other people, isn't that just as bad as backbiting?
Secondly its not like we have exactly made Islam exciting for kids growing up in a culture thats all about a fast and exciting life, so maybe instead of coming here and say look what I found look what I found, we should be discussing ways to provide alternatives for our youths wherever we live.
I'm sorry if I seem harsh but I am tired of people preaching left right and centre about being good muslims but are ready to proclaim the wrongdoings of others.

I was afraid someone was going to say this but when you say we are exposing the sins of others I think it's only wrong if we mention their names and since no one knows who these facebook people are as names haven't been mentioned we're not really doing anything wrong. It's all confidential.

 

[FreedomFighter]

:salam2:

my friends asked me to join friendster, facebook, have a myspace, but i dont want to have any of that. but its not because of this, there is just this thing that i think about these websites as..how do i say this..like rubbish..noooo offence to anyone, just how i view it. but i know its not all that bad if you care about what you are doing.

 

[Nurain]

Asalamu alaykum all sisters

This is the reality today I had these social networks before (and still do at facebook) they will put “religion – Islam” and I am not one to judge, I suppose only Allah knows what is in their hearts but the picture they post mashaAllah they need to take it off!

There are a number of hadith whereby the prophet says to do exactly the opposite as the kaffirs are doing (ie jews and Christians) but look at these people, yeah doing the OPPOSITE THEY ARE – the total opposite from what the prophet taught us! They are actually following EXACTLY like the kaffirs and pretty much enjoying it. It is a shame. Who is to tell them to take off the “Muslim” claim? … hope Allah gives them an awareness one day because it is really putting a shame to the ummah.

And how about the girls who wear hijab but in pictures take them off? How many people view their profile and how many burden of sins do they carry… each time a man views their profile with the exposed hair (and other bodily parts). Sometimes it is your own cousin or your own friend, you feel at a loss of how to tell them. I still do not know how to point out to them.

I have the same sentiments as you (and more) because it makes me angry that these girls are selling themselves short when Muslim women should be leading and exemplary inshaAllah.. but I guess not.

 

[soeurette]

Whether its confidential or not does not give anyone the right to go around spreading other people's vice around. And I know the saying of the prophet about correcting sins we see, but explain to me how we are correcting anything by coming on TTI and spreading other people wrongdoings online.
Thats like someone coming to me and saying guess what I say, I saw this woman who I know is muslim omg she was drinking and dancing with guys, the person didn't tell me who it was but that doesn't make it correct.
Also despite the best intentions, there are going to be muslims around who do not want you preaching to them about what is halal and haram, and that will infact turn them off even more. Its like when people insisted I wear hijab, I didn't want to be preached to, I made the decision on my own many years later.
I know I'm going to get quotes left right and centre, but honestly if we can't adapt our teaching styles we are going to lose our teens. It may not be right, it may make you upset but instead of concerning yourself with how many sins someone is going to acrew concern yourself with how can we spread the message in a way that they will be attracted and want to learn.

 

[nita madjid]

Islam ... Our Identity?

Assalamualaikum wr. wb.

This is a world wide phenomenon occurs daily, not just in non-muslim countries (US, Europe, etc). It happens on the middle east which we portray as the "Kiblah" of Islam. As well as Malaysia and its neighbor -the biggest muslim country, my country- Indonesia. When you were born a muslim and not raise a muslim. You will take Syahadah for granted, and do not really grasp its concept and its spirit as an IQRAR and OATH as well as PLEDGE toward Allah and His Prophet (PBUH). Rather it is just another item on your ID card.

Who should I blame for this, my parents who beat me as I was growing up for not praying and ironically they were not praying them selves. So I deem Islam as the religion of Hypocrite. The government who take the Rooh out of Religious courses at school and change it into another subject with so many things to memorized for the school test- though not understood....!

It took me 24 years without understanding of Islam and guidance from the Quran, that I live in the darkness, humiliate my self in front of Allah, was an ally of Shaitan (who's the WORST of friend indeed!!!!!). Before I raise my hand asking for his permission and guidance to walk on his path (for no one will be able to walk on His right Path, should he does not permit and guide one to do such). Then Quran REALLY came into my life.

Do I wish that I got my wake up call earlier...? OBVIOUSLY
Do I wish that the Hijabi sisters do smile to other girls who are not hijabi? Yes!
But the prophet (PBUH) told us that asking the past with "What if" and "If only", only open the door for Shaitan's temptation -something which I need to remind my self every minute of it. \

It is good that we are spreading Islam as Rahmatanlilalamin to the non-muslim. But it is also important for us to remember, unlike Christianity which religious spreading of all possible means is an obligation for them (Thus the missionary are world wide improvement), we are not to tell non muslim about Islam unless we are defending it from their condemnation or responding toward their question.

On the other hand saving our brother and sister in Islam (if not in Faith, yet) is an obligation for us all, even only one AYAH. So talking about this is not a wrong doing!!! It is a reminder for you that there's still your younger sister, your older brother, your cousin, your neighbor, who need to be saved.
They might do it because they do not know, or they are just too proud. So... Let's enlight them while humble our self, to save them. InsyaAllah, Ameen ya Rabbal Alameen.

 

[nyerekareem]

Whether its confidential or not does not give anyone the right to go around spreading other people's vice around. And I know the saying of the prophet about correcting sins we see, but explain to me how we are correcting anything by coming on TTI and spreading other people wrongdoings online.
Thats like someone coming to me and saying guess what I say, I saw this woman who I know is muslim omg she was drinking and dancing with guys, the person didn't tell me who it was but that doesn't make it correct.
Also despite the best intentions, there are going to be muslims around who do not want you preaching to them about what is halal and haram, and that will infact turn them off even more. Its like when people insisted I wear hijab, I didn't want to be preached to, I made the decision on my own many years later.
I know I'm going to get quotes left right and centre, but honestly if we can't adapt our teaching styles we are going to lose our teens. It may not be right, it may make you upset but instead of concerning yourself with how many sins someone is going to acrew concern yourself with how can we spread the message in a way that they will be attracted and want to learn.

:salam2:

sister, there were several reasons as to why i posted this thread. one of which was to serve as a reminder to all muslims and myself included. i went on this muslim friend search on myspace as an act of desperation in a sense. i have been a muslim for almost half my life and i'm nearly 30 years old. would you believe in all that time i have only been asked my name twice? i have only received salaam about twenty times. i have never been invited into a muslim home or invited for an iftar dinner. this has been like this for me at several masajid that i have attended. quite honestly i have been flat out ignored. i was hoping that i could meet muslims on myspace that were near my area that i could become friends with. i get so overjoyed when i see another muslim be it a male or female, yet none have been excited to meet me. here i am trying to get into good company with my fellow brothers in islam and they're out there trying to live lives contrary to islam and representing islam in a bad way. we are called to defend our deen and present it properly. the fact that i had mentioned what some muslims were doing on myspace wasn't backbiting. it's no different when we condemn muslims that erroneously perform acts in the name of islam through terrorism. we are obligated to condemn those acts.

it's just sad when a brother that loves his people for the sake of ALLAH SWT has to go outside the masjid to look for muslim friends because the masjid hasn't befriended him.

 

[*StarLight*]

:salam2:
there’s an old spanish saying that goes like this: tell me who your friends are and i’ll tell you who you are. i never really thought about that saying before, but today at nearly 30 years old; i now see how true that is.

now, i know that there is debate amongst muslims as to whether or not MYSPACE is halal or haram, but i have an account with MYSPACE that i rarely visit; and i was interested in meeting more muslim friends through the networking site. as a muslim my main preference for who i associate are muslims. not that i don’t have non-muslim friends, but i can’t stay or grow strong in my deen with them. which is what i really need most in my life. so naturally, i went to the site’s search engine and searched for muslim men to become friends with that were near my area. i was hoping to get to know them and become friends and to grow together in our deen and be supportive of one another as brothers in islam.

not surprisingly, there were several hundred people in the the search results. one by one, for the most part; i was surprised to see the things that i had saw. there were images of half naked women, alcoholic beverage consumption, filthy rap music; in other words: everything that was contrary to the way of islam. you may or may not have visited the site before, but people list information about their marital status, education, zodiac sign, sexual orientation, and religion. since, i searched for people that were muslims, each and every person that came in the results identified themselves as muslims. i began to wonder, how can they have these things on their pages and claim to be muslim? what image are they presenting to the non-muslims? if they’re doing the things of the unbelievers, how can they convince anyone of the HAQQ ( TRUTH ) of islam?

still being shocked about the individual profiles that i searched; i also checked out who were on their friends list. not surprisingly, they were almost all of the same or a bit worse. so i began to wonder, you’re a muslim and you have friends like this? now, i’m not saying that none of these people aren’t muslim, but some have to really step back and check their deen. this is why i mentioned that old spanish saying earlier. if you’re going to be a muslim, living in a non muslim society that still questions our every move; you gotta represent the religion better. try to represent our deen according to the ways of the quran and sunnah.

i remind myself before i remind others.

nyere kareem

:salam2:

True very true.
Facebook is much the same.
And for the very reason of your quote i left it.

It is sad very sad and disgraceful to the Ummah.

 

[sal12]

:salam2:

sister, there were several reasons as to why i posted this thread. one of which was to serve as a reminder to all muslims and myself included. i went on this muslim friend search on myspace as an act of desperation in a sense. i have been a muslim for almost half my life and i'm nearly 30 years old. would you believe in all that time i have only been asked my name twice? i have only received salaam about twenty times. i have never been invited into a muslim home or invited for an iftar dinner. this has been like this for me at several masajid that i have attended. quite honestly i have been flat out ignored. i was hoping that i could meet muslims on myspace that were near my area that i could become friends with. i get so overjoyed when i see another muslim be it a male or female, yet none have been excited to meet me. here i am trying to get into good company with my fellow brothers in islam and they're out there trying to live lives contrary to islam and representing islam in a bad way. we are called to defend our deen and present it properly. the fact that i had mentioned what some muslims were doing on myspace wasn't backbiting. it's no different when we condemn muslims that erroneously perform acts in the name of islam through terrorism. we are obligated to condemn those acts.

it's just sad when a brother that loves his people for the sake of ALLAH SWT has to go outside the masjid to look for muslim friends because the masjid hasn't befriended him.

I kinda know what you mean but I do think it's brilliant masha'allah how you've still held on to Islam despite your bad experience's with Muslims. Because of your experience's I can understand why those pictures on Myspace frustrated you. I just pray to Allah that you find some true Muslim friends because I know how much Muslims need each other!