i need your advice jazakom Allahu khyran

[islamisthesolution]

bismillah al Rahman al Rheem
mom just told me thet there is a young man who proposed to me he is the son of one of my mother`s friend the peoblem is that i know that this youngman is arrogant and i just dont see that he is the one for me but how i convience mom that dont find in him this pious husband while i know that mom wants me to get married as soon as possible because she wants to feel that i am safeier with a husband i dont want mom to be mad at me and at the same time i dont want to get married to someone i dont feel comfortable with plus i know alot of ppl who say i can miss the train of marriage and however i know that Allah wants the best for me
and another thing how can i choose my future husband while i cant know who really he is?
i dont know but i wll prayfor Allah to guide me to the right direction
salaam 3lykum wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh

 

[naaad]

Salaaam Alaikum sister,
firstly, free your mind from all thoughts and make ablution (Wudhu) really well. pray two rak'ahs with niyyah (intention) of Istikharah followed by Dua Istikharah.
just leave everything to ALLAH and be content that after Salaat Istikhaarah, whatever happens in your life is for your good and destined for you...
try being frank with your mom and tell her how you feel nicely. also tell her that you are going to pray Salaat Istikharah. i am sure she'll understand and give you the space you need..

May ALLAH guide you to what is right and May HE give you a pious man as husband....

 

[islamisthesolution]

Salaaam Alaikum sister,
firstly, free your mind from all thoughts and make ablution (Wudhu) really well. pray two rak'ahs with niyyah (intention) of Istikharah followed by Dua Istikharah.
just leave everything to ALLAH and be content that after Salaat Istikhaarah, whatever happens in your life is for your good and destined for you...
try being frank with your mom and tell her how you feel nicely. also tell her that you are going to pray Salaat Istikharah. i am sure she'll understand and give you the space you need..

May ALLAH guide you to what is right and May HE give you a pious man as husband....

thanks for telling me that but i can not be free from these thoughts as you think when mom wants something to be done she does it especially when she thinks its for my best plus i dont want her to get mad at me and what i feel towards this man isnt going to change so i am still kind of confused
jazak Allahu khyran

 

[a_brother]

:salam2: sister hijab al3efah

marriage is a tough decision for one to make, IS NOT EASY... especially for sisters... take your time and think and most importantly, pray salat istikara... May Allah show you what is best for you in this life and here-after...

The characteristic of piety applies to the groom just as much as to the bride. The guardian of the woman should make this his first and top priority just as the man looking for a wife should make it his. The Prophet (sas) said:

"Idhaa ataakum man tardhauna deenahu wa khuluqahu fa zawwijoohu. Illaa taf'aloo takun fitnatun fiy al-ardhi wa fasaadun kabeerun."
"If someone with whose piety and character you are satisfied with comes to you, marry to him. If you do not do so, there will be trials in the earth and a great deal of evil." At-Tirmidhi and others and it is hassan.

In the previous hadith addressed to those in charge of the marital affairs of Muslim women and girls, the Prophet (sas) commanded them to facilitate their marriage when they are satisfied with two issues: the faith of the suitor and his character.

Character is of extreme importance in Islam and goes hand in hand with faith and piety. The Prophet (sas) has even described it as the purpose of his mission to mankind as we can see from the following hadith:

"Innama bu'ithtu li utammima saliha al-akhlaaqi."
"I have only been sent to complete good character." Al-Hakim and others (sahih)

"Anaa za'eemun bibaitin fiy a'laa al-jannati liman hassana khuluqahu."
"I am a guarantor of a house in the highest part of Paradise for one who makes his character good." Abu Daud and it is hassan.

"Al-Birru husnu al-khuluqi."
"Righteousness is good character." Muslim

"Akmalu al-mu'mineen imaanan ahsanuhum khuluqan."
"The believers with the most complete iman are those with the best character." Abu Daud and it is sahih.

http://www.java-man.com/Pages/Marriage/Marriage04.html

 

[islamisthesolution]

jazakom Allahu khyran that is really beneficial and i think i am going to talk with my mother about how they should choose the groom and may Allah guide us all to the best decisions