hager
Junior Member
-Societies are the building blocks of nations, families are the building blocks of societies, and the married couple is the building block of the family. Unless the basic building block is good, the entire structure will be weak.
A to Z of a Successful Marital Relationship
When two loving individuals come together through the bond of marriage, they become one in commitment to their relationship yet remain distinct individuals with independent thoughts, feelings, emotions and opinions. If one tries to make the other like himself or herself then you have in actual fact tried to marry yourself. Human beings are human beings, each one unique; Accept that fact and display that acceptance with Affection. Let there be a Balance in your attitude that reflects the Care and Consideration that is necessary for Development of the relationship as well as for the individuals in the relationship. Enrich one another through mutual Faith in the Supreme Being, growing together in Hope and Inspiring one another with the Joys of a shared life.
Let Kindness and Love Motivate every decision. Never ignore the need to Notice the other, except when Overlooking the shortcomings of each other. Provide the Passion and compassion needed in this special relationship. Quietly appreciate your togetherness, while privately and publicly Respecting each other.
Let there forever be a Softness in your Touch, an Understanding in your approach, Vision in your mind, Wisdom in your decisions, eXcitement in your spirit, Yearning in your heart and Zest for life in your soul.
Togetherness
The marital relationship is the most intimate of relationships.
This Qur'an makes reference to this close bond between the spouses in the words;
"they are like garments unto you as you are like garments unto them".
Within the bonds of this intimacy; shared feelings, honest and open communication, genuine understanding, mutual responsibility and caring needs to flourish.
The intimacy must provide a haven that offers a sense of warmth, safety, security and interdependence. After all, the relationship, according to the Qur'an (30:21), is founded on mawaddah (love and affection) and rahmah (tenderness and compassion), intended to result in sakinah (tranquility and harmony).
Togetherness becomes ineffective if it is limited only to bonding through physical closeness. How often has the problem between the spouses been the separation of the husband and wife in unshared emotions, in not being aware of the opinions of the other, of separate entertainment.
It is most common for the husband to keep his problems to himself, not consider the advice or opinion of his wife, of going off to enjoy sports or games while leaving the wife at home with the kids (as if it is her duty), and refusing to help with the household chores because "it is the women's work". Togetherness means much more than sitting at the table for dinner and sleeping in the same bed.
There must exist an emotional togetherness that emanates from being attuned to each other's feelings; an intellectual togetherness that allows the sharing of thoughts, ideas and opinions; a work togetherness where there is involvement in performing chores and everyday tasks; a recreational togetherness when you have fun and excitement together; a crisis togetherness when you can lean on each other and support one another in times of difficulty and tragedy; an aesthetic togetherness through which you share the beauties of the artistry of life and of living; a spiritual togetherness by means of which you inspire the best in one another and grow closer to the Creator.
Grow to be more beautiful
Physical attraction is often the first step towards marriage, but it is something that wanes as time goes by. Inner attraction has a greater lifespan. Each one has some physical beauty, but all of us can develop a more permanent beauty through a loving relationship. The secret is, that some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty; it merely moves from the face to the heart.
By: Br. Sadullah Khan
A to Z of a Successful Marital Relationship
When two loving individuals come together through the bond of marriage, they become one in commitment to their relationship yet remain distinct individuals with independent thoughts, feelings, emotions and opinions. If one tries to make the other like himself or herself then you have in actual fact tried to marry yourself. Human beings are human beings, each one unique; Accept that fact and display that acceptance with Affection. Let there be a Balance in your attitude that reflects the Care and Consideration that is necessary for Development of the relationship as well as for the individuals in the relationship. Enrich one another through mutual Faith in the Supreme Being, growing together in Hope and Inspiring one another with the Joys of a shared life.
Let Kindness and Love Motivate every decision. Never ignore the need to Notice the other, except when Overlooking the shortcomings of each other. Provide the Passion and compassion needed in this special relationship. Quietly appreciate your togetherness, while privately and publicly Respecting each other.
Let there forever be a Softness in your Touch, an Understanding in your approach, Vision in your mind, Wisdom in your decisions, eXcitement in your spirit, Yearning in your heart and Zest for life in your soul.
Togetherness
The marital relationship is the most intimate of relationships.
This Qur'an makes reference to this close bond between the spouses in the words;
"they are like garments unto you as you are like garments unto them".
Within the bonds of this intimacy; shared feelings, honest and open communication, genuine understanding, mutual responsibility and caring needs to flourish.
The intimacy must provide a haven that offers a sense of warmth, safety, security and interdependence. After all, the relationship, according to the Qur'an (30:21), is founded on mawaddah (love and affection) and rahmah (tenderness and compassion), intended to result in sakinah (tranquility and harmony).
Togetherness becomes ineffective if it is limited only to bonding through physical closeness. How often has the problem between the spouses been the separation of the husband and wife in unshared emotions, in not being aware of the opinions of the other, of separate entertainment.
It is most common for the husband to keep his problems to himself, not consider the advice or opinion of his wife, of going off to enjoy sports or games while leaving the wife at home with the kids (as if it is her duty), and refusing to help with the household chores because "it is the women's work". Togetherness means much more than sitting at the table for dinner and sleeping in the same bed.
There must exist an emotional togetherness that emanates from being attuned to each other's feelings; an intellectual togetherness that allows the sharing of thoughts, ideas and opinions; a work togetherness where there is involvement in performing chores and everyday tasks; a recreational togetherness when you have fun and excitement together; a crisis togetherness when you can lean on each other and support one another in times of difficulty and tragedy; an aesthetic togetherness through which you share the beauties of the artistry of life and of living; a spiritual togetherness by means of which you inspire the best in one another and grow closer to the Creator.
Grow to be more beautiful
Physical attraction is often the first step towards marriage, but it is something that wanes as time goes by. Inner attraction has a greater lifespan. Each one has some physical beauty, but all of us can develop a more permanent beauty through a loving relationship. The secret is, that some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty; it merely moves from the face to the heart.
By: Br. Sadullah Khan
