nyerekareem
abdur-rahman
:salam2:
when i think of some of my past experiences with religion and compare them to my experiences of being a muslim, i realized one thing: that i cannot turn back from islam. it’s been like a tattoo of truth for me. I'm not saying that there isn’t any truth in any of the world’s religions, but what I'm saying is that although they have truth in them, they aren’t the TRUTH.
that’s what separates islam from the rest of all the other religions of the world. my experience as a christian only made me a worse sinner because i took advantage of the theme that someone had died for my sins. i felt that i could commit every sin under the sun and still be redeemed because i believed someone 2000 years ago died for me.
i tried out hinduism and buddhism before, but it seemed that their goals are unattainable. i couldn’t come to terms with reincarnation. i also didn’t like the fact that there really isn’t a sense of responsibility for one’s actions in these religions. yes, i understand the concept of karma, the old saying “ what goes around comes around. “ but being reborn into the world as a dog or a pig isn’t justice for somebody that has killed people. finally, how can one be sure that they’re truly enlightened?
my time as high ranking santeria priest, left me wondering what was the point of the religion? constant divination rituals, animal sacrifice etc. i have seen amazing things in santeria practices but never understood the point of some of the things that we did. i also grew very skeptical of some of the other priest and priestesses of the religion, they were always trying to scam money from you. but what really weighed heavy on my mind, was that there was no real sense of morality. nothing was really good and nothing was really bad. there were many things that we were allowed to do that were very questionable to me and may be very questionable to others as well.
during my time with these religions, my sinning never stopped in fact they had grown. initially i began practicing islam before all of these religions. i was a very devout muslim and i refrained from sin. i feared ALLAH SWT. i thought about my consequences of my disobedience to him. however, i began involving myself with people that weren’t going to help me become a better muslim. i then slid away more and more from islam and i just left islam altogether. that’s how i got involved in the other religions.
i would get very depressed because i couldn’t be loyal to Jesus AS. yet i had always been faithful to ALLAH SWT. hinduism and buddhism never really let me get accustomed to that way of life. i of course kept sinning. never thinking about any repercussions from my actions.
spiritually, i really went downhill with santeria. as i mentioned earlier, there really isn’t a right or wrong in the religion. they’re tolerant of homosexuality, tobacco, liquor etc. the most basic of haram things, they find as halal. i was swearing, and doing all other kinds of things. but i felt empty inside. all i really wanted to do was to worship God and worship him properly.
i became very foul mouthed, watched adult movies, went to strip clubs and other bad places. and my mother noticed the changes in me. i get angry at her when she told me that i was a better person, when i had been a muslim. i hated her for saying that to me. not because she was wrong, it’s that i knew she was right!!! i indeed was a better person as a muslim. but at the time she said this to me, i had been hating muslims. i was brainwashed by christian groups to hate islam. i was bombarded with “ muslims worship a moon god “ , muhammad pbuh was a sex driven prophet, muslims are terrorists etc. i blocked out what my mom had said and continued on my messed up path of radical christianity.
then one day the danish newspaper Jyllands Posten, had published disparaging images of Islam's holiest prophet; muhammad pbuh. there was something that had long been asleep, wake up inside of me. although angry, my love for the prophet had resurfaced. i then thought about all that this great man had accomplished, and his holy character; and it finally gave me the answer to why i couldn’t be faithful to jesus AS, buddha, or santeria. i couldn’t be because i knew that deep down they weren’t meant for worship, only ALLAH SWT is worthy of that!!!!
since that realization, i have come back to my islamic beginnings. i have been studying islam very hard almost everyday. alhamdulillah, i have learned new things about islam everyday. so when i compare or study islam i know that it isn’t a half truth like the other religions, i am fully confident that it is the Truth. therefore, my knowing this means that there’s no turning back.
when i think of some of my past experiences with religion and compare them to my experiences of being a muslim, i realized one thing: that i cannot turn back from islam. it’s been like a tattoo of truth for me. I'm not saying that there isn’t any truth in any of the world’s religions, but what I'm saying is that although they have truth in them, they aren’t the TRUTH.
that’s what separates islam from the rest of all the other religions of the world. my experience as a christian only made me a worse sinner because i took advantage of the theme that someone had died for my sins. i felt that i could commit every sin under the sun and still be redeemed because i believed someone 2000 years ago died for me.
i tried out hinduism and buddhism before, but it seemed that their goals are unattainable. i couldn’t come to terms with reincarnation. i also didn’t like the fact that there really isn’t a sense of responsibility for one’s actions in these religions. yes, i understand the concept of karma, the old saying “ what goes around comes around. “ but being reborn into the world as a dog or a pig isn’t justice for somebody that has killed people. finally, how can one be sure that they’re truly enlightened?
my time as high ranking santeria priest, left me wondering what was the point of the religion? constant divination rituals, animal sacrifice etc. i have seen amazing things in santeria practices but never understood the point of some of the things that we did. i also grew very skeptical of some of the other priest and priestesses of the religion, they were always trying to scam money from you. but what really weighed heavy on my mind, was that there was no real sense of morality. nothing was really good and nothing was really bad. there were many things that we were allowed to do that were very questionable to me and may be very questionable to others as well.
during my time with these religions, my sinning never stopped in fact they had grown. initially i began practicing islam before all of these religions. i was a very devout muslim and i refrained from sin. i feared ALLAH SWT. i thought about my consequences of my disobedience to him. however, i began involving myself with people that weren’t going to help me become a better muslim. i then slid away more and more from islam and i just left islam altogether. that’s how i got involved in the other religions.
i would get very depressed because i couldn’t be loyal to Jesus AS. yet i had always been faithful to ALLAH SWT. hinduism and buddhism never really let me get accustomed to that way of life. i of course kept sinning. never thinking about any repercussions from my actions.
spiritually, i really went downhill with santeria. as i mentioned earlier, there really isn’t a right or wrong in the religion. they’re tolerant of homosexuality, tobacco, liquor etc. the most basic of haram things, they find as halal. i was swearing, and doing all other kinds of things. but i felt empty inside. all i really wanted to do was to worship God and worship him properly.
i became very foul mouthed, watched adult movies, went to strip clubs and other bad places. and my mother noticed the changes in me. i get angry at her when she told me that i was a better person, when i had been a muslim. i hated her for saying that to me. not because she was wrong, it’s that i knew she was right!!! i indeed was a better person as a muslim. but at the time she said this to me, i had been hating muslims. i was brainwashed by christian groups to hate islam. i was bombarded with “ muslims worship a moon god “ , muhammad pbuh was a sex driven prophet, muslims are terrorists etc. i blocked out what my mom had said and continued on my messed up path of radical christianity.
then one day the danish newspaper Jyllands Posten, had published disparaging images of Islam's holiest prophet; muhammad pbuh. there was something that had long been asleep, wake up inside of me. although angry, my love for the prophet had resurfaced. i then thought about all that this great man had accomplished, and his holy character; and it finally gave me the answer to why i couldn’t be faithful to jesus AS, buddha, or santeria. i couldn’t be because i knew that deep down they weren’t meant for worship, only ALLAH SWT is worthy of that!!!!
since that realization, i have come back to my islamic beginnings. i have been studying islam very hard almost everyday. alhamdulillah, i have learned new things about islam everyday. so when i compare or study islam i know that it isn’t a half truth like the other religions, i am fully confident that it is the Truth. therefore, my knowing this means that there’s no turning back.
