MaShaAllah! Parents: Giving Importance to Raising Children Islamically [Bin Baaz]

Discussion in 'Articles For Children' started by Janaan, Sep 12, 2013.

  1. Janaan
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    Janaan ربنا اغفر لنا ذنوبنا Staff Member

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    Assalaamu `alaikum warahmatullaahi wabarakaatuh! This is great for future and present fathers (parents) maashaa'Allaah.

    Question:
    I have noticed, O eminent Shaykh, that there are many of the fathers who have been negligent in raising their children leaving them to engage in things which are of the highest level of detriment to them. Due to this, I seek from your eminence that you favor us by directing the fathers to give much importance to their children; especially in this time, may Allaah reward you with good.

    Answer:
    In the name of Allaah the Most Merciful the Bestower of mercy; may prayers and peace from Allaah be upon Allaah’s Messenger, his family, his companions, and those who are guided with his guidance. As to what follows:

    This which the questioner mentioned deserves attention, because watching over the children, males and female, and giving them attention and their Islamic cultivation is an affair which is from the most important matters. The noble Prophet ﷺ said:

    كلكم راعٍ وكلكم مسؤول عن رعيته، فالرجل راع في أهل بيته ومسؤول عن رعيته، والأمير الذي ولي على الناس راعٍ ومسؤول عن رعيته، والمرأة راعية في بيت زوجها ومسؤولة عن رعيتها، والخادم راعٍ في مال سيده ومسؤول عن رعيته ثم قال: ألا وكلكم راع وكلكم مسؤول عن رعيته
    Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The man is a shepherd over his family and he is responsible for his flock. The Ameer who has been placed in charge of the people is a Shepherd, and he is responsible for his flock. The woman is a shepherd within the house of her husband and she is responsible for her flock. The servant is a shepherd over his master’s wealth and is responsible for his flock. Then he said: Indeed each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock.

    (Imaam Al-Bukhaaree reported it in his Saheeh as well as others.)

    So this great Hadeeth indicates the obligation of giving importance to one’s flock. The greatest of responsibility in that is that of the Imaam who is over the people; and he is the Ameer of the Muslims and their Sultaan. It is obligatory upon him to watch over them regarding all that which contains their rectification and the safeguarding of their religion and giving attention to that which will benefit them in the Dunyaa as well as the hereafter in accordance to his ability and as much as he can. The greatest of that is to give attention to the religion so that they are upright upon it and that they cling to it; and that is by way of performing the obligatory duties and leaving the prohibited, as is obligatory upon everyone who is in charge of the affairs of the people to rules between them with the Sharee’ah of Allaah and to make them hold fast to the legislation of Allaah. And he is not to rule between them with other than the legislation of Allaah. He is responsible for that as He, the Majestic and High, has stated:

    فَوَرَبِّكَ لَنَسْأَلَنَّهُمْ أَجْمَعِيْنَ ٩٢ عَمَّا كَانُوا يَعْمَلُونَ ٩٣
    “So, by your Lord (O Muhammad ﷺ), We shall certainly call all of them to account, For all that they used to do.” (Al-Hijr 15:92-93)

    Likewise, as in this authentic Hadeeth:

    كلكم راعٍ وكلكم مسؤول عن رعيته
    Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock.

    So he who is placed in charge over the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. We ask Allaah to give the leaders of the Muslims Tawfeeq in all that which contains their rectification and the rectification of the all Muslims.

    Likewise, every person is responsible for his household. So the father is responsible for his children and the mother is responsible for her children from the perspective of cultivating them Islamically and commanding them with the good and forbidding them from evil and making them cling to the truth and abandon that which opposes the legislation of Allaah. From that is the affair of the prayer; for it is the supporting pillar of Al-Islaam. So it obligatory upon the father to give attention to his children, and likewise the mother, so that they are upright upon the prayer and so that they safeguard it in the houses of Allaah along with the Muslims. Allaah the Mighty and Majestic says:

    حَافِظُواْ عَلَى الصَّلَوَاتِ والصَّلاَةِ الْوُسْطَى
    “Guard strictly (five obligatory) As¬-Salawaat (the prayers) especially the middle Salat (i.e. the best prayer ¬ ‘Asr).” (Al-Baqarah 2:238)

    And He, Glorified be He, said:

    وَأَقِيمُواْ الصَّلاَةَ وَآتُواْ الزَّكَاةَ وَارْكَعُواْ مَعَ الرَّاكِعِينَ
    “And perform As-Salât (Iqâmat-as-Salât), and give Zakât, and Irka’ (i.e. bow down or submit yourselves with obedience to Allaah) along with Ar-¬Raki’ûn.” (Al-Baqarah 2:43)

    He, the Majestic and High, said:

    يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواقُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَالْحِجَارَةُ
    “O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones.” (At-Tahrim 66:6)

    The parents are included in this.

    يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواقُوا أَنفُسَكُمْ وَأَهْلِيكُمْ نَارًا وَقُودُهَا النَّاسُ وَالْحِجَارَةُ
    “O you who believe! Ward off from yourselves and your families a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones.” (At-Tahrim 66:6)

    Paying attention to the affair of the prayer is from the reasons for protection from the Fire, for both the parent and the child. Allaah said, addressing his Prophet ﷺ

    وَأْمُرْ أَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلَاةِ وَاصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْهَا
    “And enjoin As-Salât (the prayer) on your family, and be patient in offering them.” (Ta-Ha 20:132)

    The Prophet ﷺ said:

    مروا أبناءكم بالصلاة لسبع واضربوهم عليها لعشر وفرقوا بينهم في المضاجع
    Command your children to pray at seven and beat them concerning it at ten; and separate them in the bed.

    So the child, whether male or female, is to be commanded to pray when he reaches seven and beaten concerning it when he reaches ten. This is because at this point he has reached and drawn near to maturity. The when he attains puberty is becomes individually obligatory and binding upon him; and he deserves, if he abandons it, to be commanded to repent; so if he repents then this is good otherwise he is killed by the leader of the Muslims. So the affair (of the prayer) is major. Hence, it is obligatory upon the fathers and the mothers, the elder brothers of the children, and their uncles to cooperate in this matter and strive hard in rectifying the children and cultivating them Islamically; and fro that is making them hold fast to the prayer and commanding them with it when they reach seven and beating them concerning it when they reach ten and fall short in that.

    Likewise, they are to be commanded with that which Allaah commands them with from righteousness toward their parents and safeguarding the tongue from abuse, cursing, and lying, and other than that from sins, from that which Allaah the Mighty and Majestic has prohibited. Likewise, that they are prohibited from consuming intoxicants and smoking so that they will not grow up upon this falsehood. So it is obligatory upon the fathers and mothers to give attention to the children regarding that which benefits them in the Dunyaa and the hereafter, and it is upon them to prohibit them from that which Allaah the Mighty and Majestic has prohibited them from, so that they grow up with a righteous upbringing and so that they will be upright upon the religion of Allaah. So when they reach puberty they will know that which is obligatory upon them and what they are prohibited from and they cultivated upon doing god and upon leaving off evil; then their father, their brother, their mother, and whoever played a role in this good will have the likes of their reward, as the noble Prophet ﷺ said:

    من دل على خير فله مثل أجر فاعله
    He who directs to good will have the likes of the reward of the one who does it.

    This is from the bounty of Allaah the glorified and High. We ask Allaah, on behalf of all, for Tawfeeq and guidance.

    Source: http://www.binbaz.org.sa/mat/17109
    Translated by: Raha ibn Donald Batts
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  2. Abu Loren
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    Abu Loren Defender of Islam!

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    Wa Alaikkum Asalaamu Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu

    Jazakhi Allah Khair sis for the article.

    I have been fortunate in my life to see the difference in seeing the way children are brought up in the West and in a country where the majority are Muslims. In the UAE where I currently live I see the Muslims from predominantly North Arfican and the Middle East bringing up their children in an Islamic environment. Most of these children are obedient to their parents, polite, respectful and above all treating everybody with respect. Contrast this to the way the children I saw in London where they are rude, disrespectful and violent at times.

    The Muslim people seem to be happier and content with life and their situation in life than their counterparts in the West. Alhamdulilah the Muslim men seems to be doing everything right to bring up their children in a happy and content family environment. Contrast this with the single parent lifestyle that is now very popular in the West where children are abandoned by the fathers. It seems that it is so easy for men to go from one relationship to another producing children wherever they can sow their seed.

    In my humble opinion the family structure is breaking down in the West whilst it is strong with a very good foundation in Islamic countries, from what I can see from the people around me who come from differendt countries throughout the Islamic world.
  3. Janaan
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    Janaan ربنا اغفر لنا ذنوبنا Staff Member

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    :salam:

    I do agree with most of what you say, but alhamdulillaah most families here also try their best to provide their kids with Islamic education and give them the proper upbringing. I know many people who've spent the first part of their childhood or even up till their early teens in Islamic countries but somehow they learned about and practiced Islam only when they moved to the West maashaa'Allaah. And as far as I'm aware the single parent lifestyle is only popular among the non-Muslims. Most Muslims here bring their religion/culture along with them which makes divorce a taboo subject, so many marriages are still going strong and the children are being cared for as best as possible. So inshaa'Allaah I hope you don't mean the Muslim families when mention the West. May Allaah `azza wa jalla keep us firm on the guidance and help us to raise and guide our children in the right direction.
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  4. Abu Loren
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    Abu Loren Defender of Islam!

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    :wasalam:

    I'm sorry you didn't understand my reply. I was comparing what I saw from the Muslims who live in the Middle East (not all obviously) and the non Muslims in the West (not all obviously). I was comparing the family breakdown in the West (non Muslims).
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    aamiin aamii

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