Please read and give me your input

[lostlilly07]

Asslamu alaikum everyone and I hope this reaches everyone in good health and strong faith

Well really I just want some input or thoughts of my situation

Today while I was out with my mother we were talking about my family and I became really depressed to point where it brought tears to my eyes even as I write this it brings to tears to my eyes. Anyway You see I come from a family that tends to break apart with each genearation when my mother was a child her mother died( my grandmother) and because of that her and brothers are not close ; therefore leaving me with questions about family but not have any resources to get answers. Now that I am older ( i am 21) I have 1 sister and 3 brothers and I am starting to same think happen to us. When I ask the quetion: when ask my mother when will it stop: you know the breaking apart she tried to tell me about the story of Noah.

Now I felt that was extreme I Have 2 brothers who are not currently muslim but doesn't islam put emphasis on family like don't cut off kin, and I really don't think my family compares to Noah's wife and son

You know I don't have children yet but I hate to bring children into world only to know that when they get older they too will fall towards the help of strangers then their own family

I wonder are families suppose to fall apart ?

 

[happy 2 b muslim]

salam sis
may allah help us in this day and age.....ameen
well i am pretty close with my family alhumdiallah, just turn to allah and allah is the only one who can fixs this, well everything good is from allah and every eveil in this world is from the satan a little twist lol.You make the first step and in return they will turn to you inshallah. sister all you need to do is try if that fails turn to allah. the prophet muhammed (pbuh) stroy will help you in how he loved the ummah sooooooooo muchh that he said that when everyone goes into jannah and some muslim are in hell being pured from there sin i will not go in untill all my ummah enters, dont quote me on it its from the top of my head but you get the point. make supplications to allah to help you with firmness in your heart and allah will indeed turn to you

salam i will make a duaa for you, inshallah:ma:

 

[Ameera]

Family Ties that break

Asslamu alaikum everyone and I hope this reaches everyone in good health and strong faith

Well really I just want some input or thoughts of my situation

Today while I was out with my mother we were talking about my family and I became really depressed to point where it brought tears to my eyes even as I write this it brings to tears to my eyes. Anyway You see I come from a family that tends to break apart with each genearation when my mother was a child her mother died( my grandmother) and because of that her and brothers are not close ; therefore leaving me with questions about family but not have any resources to get answers. Now that I am older ( i am 21) I have 1 sister and 3 brothers and I am starting to same think happen to us. When I ask the quetion: when ask my mother when will it stop: you know the breaking apart she tried to tell me about the story of Noah.

Now I felt that was extreme I Have 2 brothers who are not currently muslim but doesn't islam put emphasis on family like don't cut off kin, and I really don't think my family compares to Noah's wife and son

You know I don't have children yet but I hate to bring children into world only to know that when they get older they too will fall towards the help of strangers then their own family

I wonder are families suppose to fall apart ?

sister I am from a family just like yours, I have 7 sisters and two brothers who I never see or hear from but this had been the way of my mother and fathers family before neither of my parents kept close contact with siblings, my parents are both dead now I loved them dearly and I love my sisters and brother too, but I tried to contact them and they say hi how are you and sure we will keep in touch and they never do...

I feel over the past 9yrs now since my mom passed away my family fell apart and nothing can make them come together again, Sadly the only reason we were together was for mom and Dad and now they are gone, I pray that they are safe and well they do not even know That I am muslim they do not know that I have a family of my own I know a little more of them but I kept in touch with them through the minister of our childhood parish church Sadly he has retired in the past two years so now i have no way of knowing if they are safe and well, I pray Inshallah that they are and that they care enough to contact me as I have no way of contacting them I do not know where they live now since my parents death, Sister hold tight to your family if you can but only Allah can guide you and them together try to be the one that keeps them together by setting up meeting or get together's for them a kind of catch up once a week or month if they can fit it in .. there are so many things I do not know of my own family it makes me sad at times too but I need to keep fresh and happy for my own family inshallah that never happens to them ...

Ammera

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

First of all wipe away your tears..you belong to the family of Islam. Second, we are not the ones who bring children into the world. They are a gift from Allah subhana talla. We have no control over that one.
We each have our own journey to discover. When you are young like you siblings go off and do their own thing. Later on they will settle down and understand what blood ties mean. In a sense our siblings remind me of a great poet Rumi...we come from the same ocean...become raindrops..just to return to the ocean...just love them...
We had a family get together...it was the first time in a decade we were all together...we acted like children in front of our mother and chilled...we counted our blessings....

 

[Globalpeace]

Evolving Families!

Asslamu alaikum everyone and I hope this reaches everyone in good health and strong faith

Well really I just want some input or thoughts of my situation

Today while I was out with my mother we were talking about my family and I became really depressed to point where it brought tears to my eyes even as I write this it brings to tears to my eyes. Anyway You see I come from a family that tends to break apart with each genearation when my mother was a child her mother died( my grandmother) and because of that her and brothers are not close ; therefore leaving me with questions about family but not have any resources to get answers. Now that I am older ( i am 21) I have 1 sister and 3 brothers and I am starting to same think happen to us. When I ask the quetion: when ask my mother when will it stop: you know the breaking apart she tried to tell me about the story of Noah.

Now I felt that was extreme I Have 2 brothers who are not currently muslim but doesn't islam put emphasis on family like don't cut off kin, and I really don't think my family compares to Noah's wife and son

You know I don't have children yet but I hate to bring children into world only to know that when they get older they too will fall towards the help of strangers then their own family

I wonder are families suppose to fall apart ?

Asslamo Allaikum,

I grew up in a large family and people got married moved out etc, etc. etc.

But we now have Reverts (Black & White), Arabs, Turks, Russians, Chinese, Japanese, Afghans, Indians & all sorts within the family. It is a BLAST!

We make fun of each other, poke jokes at cultures, make fun of accents and all sorts!

When we all get together you should see all the different languages being spoken and all sorts of crazy foods which are being served.

So I tend to look at that our family hasn’t been broken apart, it has evolved and become more interesting.

Lastly and I am going to make a controversial point here!

If someone wants to meet you, you meet them with love, dignity, respect and open arms!

And If someone doesn’t want to meet you, you wish them well and move on in your life.

Remember! Blood is THICKER then Water!​

 

[Bawar]

Now I felt that was extreme I Have 2 brothers who are not currently muslim but doesn't islam put emphasis on family like don't cut off kin, and I really don't think my family compares to Noah's wife and son?

Dear sister assalamu alaikum!
islam puts a great emphasis on kinship and family ties.

Al-Baqara, Verse 27:
"Those who break Allah's Covenant after it is ratified, and who sunder what Allah Has ordered to be joined, and do mischief on earth: These cause loss (only) to themselves."

Some Muafassirin (scholars who interpret the verses of the Quran) say who sunder what Allah Has ordered to be joined is referred to kinship.
so kinship is stressed upon in islam. Islam is not for breaking the families, but for uniting them and giving them peace.

You play your part and keep in touch with them and do the best you can and leave the rest to Allah swt.
Don't sadden yourself sister. Certain things are not in our control. I had a very close family, living in one house even after getting married(We had a big house with separate blocks), but now that one family is living in 5 different countries and 4 different continents.
The strange thing is, we never even inteded to do this.

Take care of yourself sister and may Allah swt be with you.
wassalam

 

[lostlilly07]

ooh may Allah bless all those who responded to my message and yes I plan to confront some of the people who I believe is causing the stress and then I am going to allow Allah ta'la to handle it. Despite what happens I still want to have big family

 

[DOC_BRO]

ooh may Allah bless all those who responded to my message and yes I plan to confront some of the people who I believe is causing the stress and then I am going to allow Allah ta'la to handle it. Despite what happens I still want to have big family

Asalam o Alaikum
Alhumdolilah thats good to hear...
Sister one more thing i would suggest ur title or id name "lostlilly07" ... it seems ur title suggest to be more passimistic,depressing n suggesting abt ur nature n ur thoughts... so what i wanna request u is that if u give a name or an id make it such that it would boost u, it would reflect an optimistic side of urself and that will show u believe in urself above all u believe in Allah(ofcourse u do im not doubting tht) so much that even if ur in sorrow (nauzobillah) u trust in Allah tht he will lead u thru happiness. besides u will be more believing in urself tht u can make it happen with Allah's help. But if u potray as being sad or lonely or lost than it will be hard.At times ppl are being poetic also but that doesnt help much.
What i mean is even with the tiny,little,smallest stuff u can turn ur passimism or negativism into optimism n eventually boost ur will power.
So what if there might be tradition in ur family of so n so... but u make ur mind and heart firm that u wont let that happen or continue in ur family i mean ur children InshaAllah and take it as a challenge n show that this tradition can be broken by practicism Islam and that Islam is such a religion MashaAllah that brings ppl togather regardless of race,color,ethnicity,country,language etc...
I hope u didnt mind what i suggested its a psychiatrist view, but i think it will surely help to build u up. My apologies if i was being judgemental or if anything wrong.
I will end with a verse from Surah Al-Alm-Nashra= Solace,Consolation,Relief
Chapter 94 Verse 5 & 6
"FaInna Ma Al usri usrann"
Verily along with every Hardship is Relief
"Inna Ma Al Usri Usrann"
Verily along with every Hardship is Relief
(i.e There is one Hardship with two relief, so one hardship cannot overcome two relief)


Ma'Asalam

 

[hussain.mahammed]

Asslamo Allaikum,

I grew up in a large family and people got married moved out etc, etc. etc.

But we now have Reverts (Black & White), Arabs, Turks, Russians, Chinese, Japanese, Afghans, Indians & all sorts within the family. It is a BLAST!

We make fun of each other, poke jokes at cultures, make fun of accents and all sorts!

When we all get together you should see all the different languages being spoken and all sorts of crazy foods which are being served.

So I tend to look at that our family hasn’t been broken apart, it has evolved and become more interesting.

Lastly and I am going to make a controversial point here!

If someone wants to meet you, you meet them with love, dignity, respect and open arms!

And If someone doesn’t want to meet you, you wish them well and move on in your life.

Remember! Blood is THICKER then Water!​

As salamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wabrakatuhu
Its a blessing from Allah SUbhanahu wa Taala. May HE keep you all safe, sound and happy.

 

[hussain.mahammed]

As salamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wabrakatuhu dear sister

Asslamu alaikum everyone and I hope this reaches everyone in good health and strong faith

Well really I just want some input or thoughts of my situation

Today while I was out with my mother we were talking about my family and I became really depressed to point where it brought tears to my eyes even as I write this it brings to tears to my eyes. Anyway You see I come from a family that tends to break apart with each genearation when my mother was a child her mother died( my grandmother) and because of that her and brothers are not close ; therefore leaving me with questions about family but not have any resources to get answers. Now that I am older ( i am 21) I have 1 sister and 3 brothers and I am starting to same think happen to us. When I ask the quetion: when ask my mother when will it stop: you know the breaking apart she tried to tell me about the story of Noah.

Now I felt that was extreme I Have 2 brothers who are not currently muslim but doesn't islam put emphasis on family like don't cut off kin, and I really don't think my family compares to Noah's wife and son

You know I don't have children yet but I hate to bring children into world only to know that when they get older they too will fall towards the help of strangers then their own family

I wonder are families suppose to fall apart ?

Your story is emotional. Remember that everything in this world is a test for us. There are people who enjoy and remain happy most of their lives. There are people who do not seem to have any problem and keep on moving with their lives. And there are some again who seem to be full of sorrow most of their time. Don't think that the former are better than the latter? As human beings we all have problems. Important thing is how do we tackle it. What does Allah (swt) wants from us by giving such problems?
Surely we cannot imagine the Wisdom behind the work of Allah (swt) but when we have patience the fruit is really sweet and more tastier.
MAy Allah Subhanahu wa Taala keep your family strong and shower on you HIS infinite love, mercy and blessings.
wa/salam