Should I advise this sister?


New Member
Assalamu alaykum,

Sometime during September last year I went to a sweetshop and there was a hijabi sister working at the counter who I felt attracted to when I saw her, and felt she could be a good candidate for a potential wife. Fast forward to about a month ago, the Islamic Society at my uni (of which I'm the secretary) held a big event for non-Muslims called "Discover Islam Week" and to my surprise one of the volunteers at this event was this sister. I was impressed by her modest clothing and her mannerisms, and could see she had a lot of waqaar in her behaviour (when I spoke to my sister about my feelings towards this sister she told me she'd also met her briefly and she herself felt she had a very calm and modest demeanour).

After this event I thought I'd try and see what this sister put on social media, and on Facebook I saw she hasn't posted anything showing herself, just pictures of flowers and the sunset, that sort of thing. On Instagram she has no posts. I looked at the people she follows/follow her on IG and one of them had some posts showing this sister I'm talking about, and unfortunately in one of them (which was posted just over a month ago) this sister who I'm interested in was in what appears to be some sort of concert. She was with a group of friends, some of them boys, and none of the girls she was with (neither in this post nor in practically any of the other posts in which she features) wear the hijab. Frankly I was quite saddened by this post, and surprised that I would see something like this from a sister who appeared to be so modest and humble in both her attire and her behaviour. I want to speak to this sister to try and advise her that this is wrong, and I genuinely don't want to do this so I can gain her approval of me, because in that case she could just reject me as a husband in the end and then me speaking to her would've been in vain. I want to speak to her because I genuinely care about her, even if she doesn't reciprocate my feelings. I also understand of course that if I approach her as some random guy she knows nothing about it's very unlikely she'll listen to me.

So can I get some advice on whether or not this is the best course of action? If anyone thinks it is, can you advise me as to how I should go about speaking to this sister?

Sorry for the long post. There's quite a lot of context that needs to be known here.

Jazakumullahu khairan
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