Should I approach him

[Sister Fatma]

:salam2:

Dear brothers and sisters I was wondering if u could advice me regarding my problem.
There is this brother whom i've been seeing around my area for about a year now we've never spoke to one another, however we do know about each other due to our friends.
Him and I have always been giving each other looks of interest to 1 another.
for couple months now he looks as though he wants to approach me( only halal though coz he practices) and he all the sudden always happens to be behind me on my way home, every time i notice him being there and look at him he then turns around and goes away. but i look very feisty according to my family and friends, am now starting to see that coz he looks very afraid to talk to me. Once he was at the opposite road from me. he crossed the road, he was heading to the masjid, but then he saw me, we went my direction looking at me the whole way through, and stood behind me as though he was waiting for me to go to him. even though i know of him being shy, am still a bit stubborn i still believe that the boy has to make the first move so i looked at him and turn around. So he looked back at me then went back to the masjid.
I am attracted to him, and from what I know about him I like.
The problem is that I am a bit confused I do not think that am ready to get married now coz am going through a little bit of problems at the moment al hamdulillah.
But every time I think of this brother I always have that feeling that tells that I am going to end up with him, I also had dreams about it, I know that there is 3 types of dreams 1 from ALLAH SWT, 1 from the devil and the other from your soul e.g. your desires, but I don't think that I want to get married.
I don't mean to look feisty, I just do maybe the doctor dropped me a lot when I was born and caused me so kind of dysfunctional expressions I don't know, I just can't help it.

Lately I notice the brother keeping away from me, I was walking towards him, his friend saw me, said something to him, he looked and went inside the masjid. every time I see him now he keeps on doing that. B4 it would be his friend telling him I am there, it'll be him looking then it looked as though he was trying to smile at me. Why do brothers have to be so weird for real I don't get it! Am not a beast, i definitely do not look like one, so what the hell is going with this boy.
I do think that he believes that am a bit big headed, but am not. what's up with all the judgements???

Please my brothers and sisters help me to figure out what I should do.

Jazzakallahu Khairun

Ur sister fatma.

 

[Shahzad]

sister, just stop staring at him. If he wants to get u, he will approach u in halal way i.e. sending his parents to ur home.

 

[Noor_Al-Ain]

No, No, No...!!!! This will certainly scare him off if he is a practising brother... And we already know even approaching someone of the opposite sex is Harram and gazes by both parties should be kept low,,, even speaking softly to them is bad... As brother Shazad has just said if he is interested he "will send his parents to your home" or if this is taking time,,, why don't you tell your parents about him...?

Even then, Allah Knows Best

:salam2:

 

[Almeftah]

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله

Dear sister,
If he has good intentions he will take the first step, If he's shy or afraid thats his problem.

Just ignore him and pretend he's not there, and avoide any eye contact. Keep yourself away from Fitnah.

 

[AAminAA]

Should I approach him?

:salam2:

No sister, that's not right thing to do. Not even he should approach to you. That's not halal way for 2 muslims to meet. Somebody mentioned the parents, yes for this matter ! You can find out trough your friends, but those who are his friends aswell, if he's really interessed in you. If he wants to meet you, he should come to you with his parents. And as you say,that he is practising Islam, he knows that. Sister, no matter if it's a question of marriage, you 2 can't be alone, becauze third with you is shaitan l.a.,

May Allah guide you to the Siratal Mustakeem and give you what is best for you insha'Allah. Ameen !

 

[ripefig]

:salam2:

People are different, I would never approach a girl and propose (its a miracle I am married) There is no harm in making the first move via a wali etc. Our beloved Prophet was proposed to in his very first marriage.

 

[cmelbouzaidi]

Assalamu alaikom, dear sister. If this brother's intentions are good, he will ask your father for your hand in marriage, as previously said. You do not have to approach him and you should not... I do find it strange that he seemed to be following you around so if he is a decent person and he is sincere, your parents will be able to judge that. Just let him be.....

 

[Aisha Davidson]

:salam2:

I would sudgest tell your locl imam after jumah make a announcment..

'please can So and so Approach and let the lady he follows know will you marry him or not''

If that fails then ask your father/Brother to speak to him or get him to register on TTI.

innit


:salam2:

 

[Aisha Davidson]

:lol::lol::holaaa::fighta::tantrum1::jumpclap::muslim_child:

Hope u Invite All Of Us here at TTI to the walima.. Hehehe

:lol::lol::holaaa::fighta::tantrum1::jumpclap::muslim_child:

Maybe get a T-shirt saying on the front Yes, what do you Want??

And on the back saying Ask me Duhh!!

He isnt much of a ramatist is he, poor brother lol he needs toughening up and I think You should approach him and ask him... Maybe you scare him with your Marching fast walk

 

[Sister Fatma]

:salam2:

I would sudgest tell your locl imam after jumah make a announcment..

'please can So and so Approach and let the lady he follows know will you marry him or not''

If that fails then ask your father/Brother to speak to him or get him to register on TTI.

innit


:salam2:

sister aisha LOl nice one, could u just imagine the shock he would have after the jummah.

Pls my brothers and sister keep bringing ur advices.

 

[Sister Fatma]

:lol::lol::holaaa::fighta::tantrum1::jumpclap::muslim_child:

Hope u Invite All Of Us here at TTI to the walima.. Hehehe

:lol::lol::holaaa::fighta::tantrum1::jumpclap::muslim_child:

Maybe get a T-shirt saying on the front Yes, what do you Want??

And on the back saying Ask me Duhh!!

He isnt much of a ramatist is he, poor brother lol he needs toughening up and I think You should approach him and ask him... Maybe you scare him with your Marching fast walk

raaah sis how do u know that i walk fast.

 

[Rahima Ali]

:salam2:

Dear brothers and sisters I was wondering if u could advice me regarding my problem.
There is this brother whom i've been seeing around my area for about a year now we've never spoke to one another, however we do know about each other due to our friends.
Him and I have always been giving each other looks of interest to 1 another.
for couple months now he looks as though he wants to approach me( only halal though coz he practices) and he all the sudden always happens to be behind me on my way home, every time i notice him being there and look at him he then turns around and goes away. but i look very feisty according to my family and friends, am now starting to see that coz he looks very afraid to talk to me. Once he was at the opposite road from me. he crossed the road, he was heading to the masjid, but then he saw me, we went my direction looking at me the whole way through, and stood behind me as though he was waiting for me to go to him. even though i know of him being shy, am still a bit stubborn i still believe that the boy has to make the first move so i looked at him and turn around. So he looked back at me then went back to the masjid.
I am attracted to him, and from what I know about him I like.
The problem is that I am a bit confused I do not think that am ready to get married now coz am going through a little bit of problems at the moment al hamdulillah.
But every time I think of this brother I always have that feeling that tells that I am going to end up with him, I also had dreams about it, I know that there is 3 types of dreams 1 from ALLAH SWT, 1 from the devil and the other from your soul e.g. your desires, but I don't think that I want to get married.
I don't mean to look feisty, I just do maybe the doctor dropped me a lot when I was born and caused me so kind of dysfunctional expressions I don't know, I just can't help it.

Lately I notice the brother keeping away from me, I was walking towards him, his friend saw me, said something to him, he looked and went inside the masjid. every time I see him now he keeps on doing that. B4 it would be his friend telling him I am there, it'll be him looking then it looked as though he was trying to smile at me. Why do brothers have to be so weird for real I don't get it! Am not a beast, i definitely do not look like one, so what the hell is going with this boy.
I do think that he believes that am a bit big headed, but am not. what's up with all the judgements???

Please my brothers and sisters help me to figure out what I should do.

Jazzakallahu Khairun

Ur sister fatma.

NO SIS DON'T APPROACH HIM....LOWER UR GAZE WHEREVER U SEE HIM....BESIDES WHAT YOU 2 ARE DOING IS QUITE FREAKY..LOLS.....

 

[Musulmanin]

:salam2:

InshAllah he will take a first step.


Also, maybe you should ask imam about this without mentioning who the person

is.

I make dua for you sister, stay strong and modest inshAllah.

 

[abubaseer]

As Salaam Alaykum,

Ask the Imam to give lecture/Khutbah on Islamic way of courtship.

 

[wardah noor]

salam sister.

as many have said already it is not a good idea to approach him, so i think you should keep away from any form of fitnah coz it may lead to haram.

maybe you should mention it to your parents and make it halal as possible and advice sister lower your gaze.

i pray for you inchallah sister :blackhijab:

 

[Boomerang]

Salam sister,

I am new to Islam, so this kind of thing is new to me. I'd say to keep your gaze lowered, but after that...I am not sure. Speak to your Imam. that might work.

Inshallah it will work out the best for both of you. Allah knows best.