hayat84
I'm not what you believe
:salam2:,my name's Hayat,I'm 25 years old,I'm Italian and I'm married to a man coming from Morocco.Whwn I was a girl,we never talk about Islam,neither at school nor at home:Islam for me was something untouchable,I feared it,because the everyday's news talked often about terrorism and islamic estremism and so on.My original name was Sùndari,I grew between Catholisism and Hinduism,because I was at first baptised in the church and later,because of the Hindu's interests of my parents,I was obliged to prostrate in front of the statues:even if I didn't accept it I was polytheist and I often went to the festivals dressing Hindus' clothes:It was ashaming for me because even if I was only a little girl,I knew that some soullesses statues didn't give anything.I was confused
but I had to do it:the most important thing was that in the community in which I lived(its name is HARE KRISHNA)the children were considered something impure from the material creation,and for this reason my mother was often obliged to have a shower anytime she touched me and my brothers!It was scandalous offering the breakfast to those statues at first and to let us waiting to eat!I was 8 years old when we came out from tha community,but in the mind of my father rested somenthing that comnditionned him:he liked to wacth to the statues even if he didn't prostrate to them,we had a vegetarian alimentation,but when I slowly grew up,the speeches between me and my fathe become deeper.I asked him who created the Universe and so on:everytime he gave me a different answer,but he never sayd that there was an Only Creator;from the age of 14 to 18 I hadn't any religious interest,above all because my father always told me that the religion was just something that needed toHman being to be esclave of it and so I thought that it could be better to be free from it.I believed,as my father sayd to me,that when the human body died,the soul would have gone in a certain space in the Universe,but he never told me Who was the author of all:he didn't talk abot Allah as the creator,but he just sayd tha there was an Universal Energy:when I asked his-Who created that Energy?-he answered me that it was too difficult for me to undersyand that behind that energy there was MY FATHER HIMSELF!!!I was shocked and worried.But Allah guided me to the right direction and when I was 19 years old I knew a muslim boy,who was interested to me:at first I didn't trust into him,but I slowly learned to listen him and his religion.I was so interested that I asked my father to give me the copy of the Quran I had at home(and that I had never read)and I started to read it.It gave me a stranga sensation:it was like the Quran itself was talking to me and punishing me for my misbelieving;but at the same time it gave me a sense of peace,becouse I often read that Allah forgives any sin.I went to Morocco with my future husband and I took a look at the landscape:it was wonderful,the women's clothes were more pudic than in Italy and there were a lot of mosques which called the muslims to the prayer.The first time I went there I liked Morocco and the muslim climate that I felt,but unforunately I felt ill.I had 1000 doubts,I asked-where is Allah?-I was searching for the Faith in Allah and some days before my marriage I found it:I accepted the presence of Allah in my life and I slowly changed my life:this is why my name is HAYAT.I still have a strong faith in Allah,but as He entered in my life,the DEVIL too is tempting me to do mistakes...
.Today I'm happy my husband,my two doughters and a son(who will come to the world
at the end of april),but I'm alone,because in the last times the communication with my parents was stopped.I don't know exatly the reason,the they perhaps think that I gave them a delusion by becoming muslim and by the fact tha all my sons will be be muslims in the Earth.I told them abot Islam,but it was like doing a hole in the water.This is my story,I hope you'll like it and you'll give me some advises
but I had to do it:the most important thing was that in the community in which I lived(its name is HARE KRISHNA)the children were considered something impure from the material creation,and for this reason my mother was often obliged to have a shower anytime she touched me and my brothers!It was scandalous offering the breakfast to those statues at first and to let us waiting to eat!I was 8 years old when we came out from tha community,but in the mind of my father rested somenthing that comnditionned him:he liked to wacth to the statues even if he didn't prostrate to them,we had a vegetarian alimentation,but when I slowly grew up,the speeches between me and my fathe become deeper.I asked him who created the Universe and so on:everytime he gave me a different answer,but he never sayd that there was an Only Creator;from the age of 14 to 18 I hadn't any religious interest,above all because my father always told me that the religion was just something that needed toHman being to be esclave of it and so I thought that it could be better to be free from it.I believed,as my father sayd to me,that when the human body died,the soul would have gone in a certain space in the Universe,but he never told me Who was the author of all:he didn't talk abot Allah as the creator,but he just sayd tha there was an Universal Energy:when I asked his-Who created that Energy?-he answered me that it was too difficult for me to undersyand that behind that energy there was MY FATHER HIMSELF!!!I was shocked and worried.But Allah guided me to the right direction and when I was 19 years old I knew a muslim boy,who was interested to me:at first I didn't trust into him,but I slowly learned to listen him and his religion.I was so interested that I asked my father to give me the copy of the Quran I had at home(and that I had never read)and I started to read it.It gave me a stranga sensation:it was like the Quran itself was talking to me and punishing me for my misbelieving;but at the same time it gave me a sense of peace,becouse I often read that Allah forgives any sin.I went to Morocco with my future husband and I took a look at the landscape:it was wonderful,the women's clothes were more pudic than in Italy and there were a lot of mosques which called the muslims to the prayer.The first time I went there I liked Morocco and the muslim climate that I felt,but unforunately I felt ill.I had 1000 doubts,I asked-where is Allah?-I was searching for the Faith in Allah and some days before my marriage I found it:I accepted the presence of Allah in my life and I slowly changed my life:this is why my name is HAYAT.I still have a strong faith in Allah,but as He entered in my life,the DEVIL too is tempting me to do mistakes....Today I'm happy my husband,my two doughters and a son(who will come to the worldat the end of april),but I'm alone,because in the last times the communication with my parents was stopped.I don't know exatly the reason,the they perhaps think that I gave them a delusion by becoming muslim and by the fact tha all my sons will be be muslims in the Earth.I told them abot Islam,but it was like doing a hole in the water.This is my story,I hope you'll like it and you'll give me some advises
