Urgent Help !!

[enoch]

Salams my dear brothers and sisters,

Frankly speaking this is how I am feeling and I am sure this is the mentality of anyone who is so engrossed with the materialistic world.

We are so hooked onto the dealings with life that you forget the origins of your reason for living.

I am one such victim, I am so fed up with my life and I am fed up with the suffocation that I have been enduring for the last 10 Years of my life.

I have been a victim of abuse as a child, victim of sociophobia where even the mere brush of a guy would make me aggressive and violent.

Alhamdulillah Allah has blessed me with intelligence and discipline and I used it to the max in accomplishing my academic goals, but things changed, I faced obstacles and diversity in life, certain phenomenons that has warped my mind and understanding, placing me in a dilemma of being in awe and being extremely angry and upset and unjustified.

Long story short, I was also a victim of black magic, apparently done by people who I once considered close, done for the SIMPLE reason: they don't want me to be successful in life, anything that I do since then have been nothing but a trauma, of conflicting voices in my head, of having terrible dreams and being unable to wake up from my sleep and being trapped in my dreams.

I have come far along since, my isolation from society have made me socially inept, I want to pray but am pushed away by my misery.

This is me now, healthy, analytical and sound minded.. alhamdulillah but my life is plagued with ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, FEAR OF FAILURE, FEAR OF REJECTION AND MEDIOCRITY.

My abused childhood has been a key factor in my detioration in self image and self respect.

My so called 'black magic' influenced traumas, has left me purposeless, worthless and social phobic.

My question to you all ?

PLEASE HELP ME, GUIDE ME

I so far have realised that in the circle of life, everyone goes through ups and downs but the only thing we will be merited with will be our contribution towards the deen and our struggle to uphold our imaan.

What is the best possible way to attain TAQWA?

Can anyone please post, advice on the lifestyle, routine, anything that will help me start initially?

I am a very structured, visual and analytical minded person and I know this will take a lot of effort on your part but I sincerely am asking as a last resort.

Jazakallah

 

[sabina isa]

:salam2:
First of all brother remember to smile. Sounds lot like me, yet I do smile, laugh, hope and strive. Hold fast to the rope of Allah, that where the best of your given abilities are worthy and rightly rewarded. I feel for you and pray from heart that souls as yours and mine will find the place that Lord has determined for in this life. Allah Tawfeeq - I love this :blackhijab:

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

When was the last time your prayed? When was the last time you gave zakat? When was the last time you took time to tell your wife how important she is in your life?

( By the way, welcome to TTI..InshaAllah..we can make the sunshine a little in your life)

 

[kashif_nazeer]

Salams my dear brothers and sisters,

Frankly speaking this is how I am feeling and I am sure this is the mentality of anyone who is so engrossed with the materialistic world.

We are so hooked onto the dealings with life that you forget the origins of your reason for living.

I am one such victim, I am so fed up with my life and I am fed up with the suffocation that I have been enduring for the last 10 Years of my life.

I have been a victim of abuse as a child, victim of sociophobia where even the mere brush of a guy would make me aggressive and violent.

Alhamdulillah Allah has blessed me with intelligence and discipline and I used it to the max in accomplishing my academic goals, but things changed, I faced obstacles and diversity in life, certain phenomenons that has warped my mind and understanding, placing me in a dilemma of being in awe and being extremely angry and upset and unjustified.

Long story short, I was also a victim of black magic, apparently done by people who I once considered close, done for the SIMPLE reason: they don't want me to be successful in life, anything that I do since then have been nothing but a trauma, of conflicting voices in my head, of having terrible dreams and being unable to wake up from my sleep and being trapped in my dreams.

I have come far along since, my isolation from society have made me socially inept, I want to pray but am pushed away by my misery.

This is me now, healthy, analytical and sound minded.. alhamdulillah but my life is plagued with ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, FEAR OF FAILURE, FEAR OF REJECTION AND MEDIOCRITY.

My abused childhood has been a key factor in my detioration in self image and self respect.

My so called 'black magic' influenced traumas, has left me purposeless, worthless and social phobic.

My question to you all ?

PLEASE HELP ME, GUIDE ME

I so far have realised that in the circle of life, everyone goes through ups and downs but the only thing we will be merited with will be our contribution towards the deen and our struggle to uphold our imaan.

What is the best possible way to attain TAQWA?

Can anyone please post, advice on the lifestyle, routine, anything that will help me start initially?

I am a very structured, visual and analytical minded person and I know this will take a lot of effort on your part but I sincerely am asking as a last resort.

Jazakallah

:salam2:

Welcome to TTI,first of all.
Dear brother,
What you have gone through is very hard indeed and I can only imagine how it feels.
Sociophobia is one of the biggest diseases these days.
First of all,seek help with Allah because Him alone we ask for help.Cry to Him alone and to no one else.
Akhi,what is in the past is in the past,leave it there,do not look at it except to take lessons.All of the source of this social anxiety,fear phobia etc,it's shaytaan,he is hopeleess,miserable and hates humans,wants us to be the same way.Shaytaan plays with minds of human beings trying to cause them harm but Allah says in the Qur'an:

That is only Satan who frightens [you] of his supporters. So fear them not, but fear Me, if you are [indeed] believers.[3:175] Surah Ali Imran [Interpretation of meaning]

Just take a moment think about your situation.Divide it into rights and wrongs of what is happening.Look at the rights and reject the wrongs.Look at the things in life Allah provided you without you even asking him,like Islam,health,intelligence,Earth to walk on,Ssky as a ceiling,water to drink,oxygen to breathe.Try writing down favors bestowed on you and you know what?You will see the favors being so many,that it will dorwn the darkness,do this while you read Qur'an for example it says in Surah Al Baqarah[Interpretation of meaning]::

O mankind, worship your Lord, who created you and those before you, that you may become righteous -
[He] who made for you the earth a bed [spread out] and the sky a ceiling and sent down from the sky, rain and brought forth thereby fruits as provision for you. So do not attribute to Allah equals while you know [that there is nothing similar to Him].(2:22-23)

In surah Yasin
Do they not see that We have created for them from what Our hands have made, grazing livestock, and [then] they are their owners?
And We have tamed them for them, so some of them they ride, and some of them they eat.
And for them therein are [other] benefits and drinks, so will they not be grateful?[71:73]
[It is] He who made for you from the green tree, fire, and then from it you ignite.[71:81]

SubhanAllah,look at the things around you and think about Allah who provided it for you without you even asking and best of all made you muslim,look at people around you,that you love and think of The Most Merciful who placed mercy and love for you in their hearts.Look at your ownself and your creation:

Then We made the sperm-drop into a clinging clot, and We made the clot into a lump [of flesh], and We made [from] the lump, bones, and We covered the bones with flesh; then We developed him into another creation. So blessed is Allah , the best of creators.[23:14]

My advice dear brother is just anything you see think about Allah who created it and reflect on it.
Also attach your heart to Qur'an,the heart that is attached to Qur'an can never be overcome by grief and sorrow since it is wet with rememberance of Allah.Recite it as much as you can,as often as you can,inshaAllah
Try to get busy,workout etc.

There is a cure for all types of diseases in Qur'an,just read it and reflect on it.
There is a dua I would reccommend that you read,the following:
[yt]4JQfqaUhy-g[/yt]

Regarding black magic,I would like to advice you that read mua'wwidhatayn[verses of refuge](surah al falaq and an nas) also recite surah al ikhlas,read surah Al Baqarah daily,or more freqently,because it is a hadith's mahfoom that shaytaan runs from the house where surah Baqrah is recited.Believe me it's powerful,I am telling from experience,you will notice a very big change in yourself.I used to be a sociophobe too,but alhamdulillah it's gone now.It is Allah who helps .
May Allah protect us from it.Ameen.
All these are whisperings of shaytan shrug them off.Not equal are evil deeds and good deeds,repell evil deeds with good deeds.Repel evil thoughts with good ones and seek refuge in Allah often,whenever such thought occur be concsious that it's nothing but that shaytaan messing with our heads.
Lastly,life is too short to be sad or anguished about.Allah gave you this life and He will take it from you one day,why be sad.Praise Him and Glorify Him for the days of our lives that is left,fearing Him and Loving Him and thanking Him for the gifts.
Be brave and from now on be determined to utilise all the abilities you possess. Be successful. Replace the frown on your face with a smile,depression with cheerfulness, miserliness with generosity, and anger with perseverance. Turn your calamities into occasions of joy and your faith into a weapon!
Always remember that we are not here forever and life is nothing but a collection of events where we are tried.Just stand firm in them through sabr and salah(prayer and patience).Because "To Allah we belong and to Him shall we be returned."
Remember,for a believer,even calamaities are a kind of blessing for if a muslim is patient in that time,His sins are forgiven on account of his patience even if it were as small as a pricking of a thorn.SubhanAllah.A believer is always in the shade of Allah's mercy,since when he was in his father to the day he dies,to the day he will enter jannah.When he was in his father Allah had mercy and out of a million sperm only he made it.Then when inside his mother,which would usually reject a foreign body,it nurtured and protected him in his period of weakness,then when he became a man and Allah helped him stay firm,and he died as a believer in Allah's mercy and in heaven inshaAllah,again he will be in Allah's mercy.So for a believer there is nothing to be anguished over.Just worship Allah in between hope and fear.Like a salaf has said,be like a bird whose one wing is of hope and other of fear.When the conditions are adverse and tough,the wing of hope should be held onto,i.e one should have more hope than fear at the time of calamities and when condition is good wing of fear should bee held onto,i.e one should fear Allah more.
May Allah help you and me and us all to be steadfast and die in a state of belief.Ameen.


Wa iyyaka

 

[rahman2040]

Assalam

Brother dont worry, Here are some Dua's use it


Main link
http://www.islamicacademy.org/html/Dua/Dua.htm

Dua for the cure of ninety nine diseases - Cure for Sorrow and Grief
http://www.islamicacademy.org/html/Dua/Lahaol.htm

Dua For Fear
http://www.islamicacademy.org/html/Dua/Dua_for_Fear.htm

Ayatul Kursi (English)
http://www.islamicacademy.org/html/Dua/Ayatul_Kursi.html

uses of Ayatul Kursi
Rasool Allah peace be upon him said, "Whoever recites Aayatul Kursi after every Fard (Fard Salat). Only death is keeping him/her from entering Jannah. (As soon as he/she dies, will enter Jannah)
(Nisa'i, Ibne Habban, Ibnelsani A'n Abi Amatah Albahili Radiallah Anhu)

It's in another Hadis that Reciting Ayatul Kursi after one Fard (Fard Salat) will stay in Allah's protection until the next Salat.
(Tibrani Fil Kabeer, A'n Alhasan Bin Ali Radiallah Anhu)

Imam Bihaqi States that the one who recites Ayatul Kursi before falling asleep, Allah Tala gives protection to his/her home and his/her Family.
(Marqat Sharah Mishkaat, Mulla Ali Qaderi, vol. 2 pp. 583)

It's in another Hadis Jinns and Shaitans do not come close to the house in which Ayatul Kursi is recited. (Tirmizi Altargheeb Wal Tarheeb Lilmanzari vol.2 pp.631)

Hadrat A'isha Radiallah Anha states that a person arrived in the court of Nabi kareem Sallal Laaho Alaihi Wasallam and complained that there is no Barkat (Blessings) in anything in his home. Rasool Allah peace be upon him said, "You do not recite Ayatul Kursi, whichever Food and Curry you will recite Ayatul Kursi on, Allah Tala will give Blessings on that Food and Curry. (Tafseer Dar Manshoor vol. 1 pp. 323)
May Allah bless you...

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2:

I think the most important thing you should start with is to pray at time with a heart. Try to be with a good company . Do good in your life . Remember Allah subhanahu wa taala , and read quran . I am sure you will feel the differance after each prayer.

 

[Aapa]

Assalaam walaikum,

Brother,

I think the seriousness and ernestness of the replies should let you know that we are here to walk with you. We will do as we say. We will make dua for you. We will stay in contact with you as much as you want us. Please keep posting.

 

[lovefordeen]

Assalaamu alaikum brother...
make dua....and more dua...beg Allah swt for His mercy,His guidance and forgiveness...



lets try by first offering the fardh salat on time...try not to miss it whatever happens.....and try to change your way of dressing next..look like a muslim....wear a beard...(only if you aren't already)...naturally shaytaan will start whispering in your ears when you start offering fardh salat...say "Audhu billah mina shaytanir-Rajeem"...and sometimes the devil may not let you concentrate in your salah..ignore...]just ignore[]....and concentrate on performing your salat with khushoo...if you ignore the whisperings of shaytaan and take refugee in Allah....then what can the devil do...never try to answer him..just ignore....because answering him is dangerous and falling into his dirty trap...and take refuge in Allah by saying "Audhu billah mina shaytanir-Rajeem"

then try to obey Allah's orders in all walks of life...try to stay away from the things He has forbidden...and try to keep company with some good muslim friends....as friends do have an influence on our deen....

reciting surah al nas and falaq may help insha'allah ...beg Allah swt for His mercy...keep asking....ask him to keep you away from black magic and all that...be to Him in the late hours of night ....and please dont forget to forget your past....remember that your unhapppy childhood was not your fault....try to let it go and be easy on yourself... but of what you make the rest of your life..you are responsible... so be easy on yourself and please dont look at your past,but concentrate on the wonderful things Allah has given us...say alhamdulilah...dont look at thosde who have succeeded more than you in the material world...but try to be like people who are more pious than you...compete with them in a god way..and help others...

see you dont have to care about what others think of you,but what Allah swt thinks of you...please keep this in your mind..if people say bad things to you,ignore them and move on...this life is too short to waste on jealous people..learn to smile...more and more..its a sunnah...and wonder on the creations of Allah and praise Him...this my help you to become a cheerful person...

take a hobby such as growinng plants,exercising or anything you like so that you can be happy insha'allah...


May Allah protect you and guide us all..ameen

:tti_sister:

and finally please dont forget to ask for help..if you find any difficulties,post in TTI and many friends may help you insha'allah..

May Allah forgive me if i have said something wrong..


assalaamu alaikum

 

[lovefordeen]

i forgot to mention a very important thing...recite the qur'an....and ponder over its meanings....and make it a regular habit..
assalaamu alaikum

 

[lovefordeen]

assalaam alaikum

and please do lots of dhikr...it may hepl you insha'allah

:tti_sister:

assalaamu alaikum

 

[enoch]

Jazakallah for all the inspiring replies, I will insha'Allah place emphasis on them in my day to day life

Salaam Alaikum

 

[nyerekareem]

ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, FEAR OF FAILURE, FEAR OF REJECTION AND MEDIOCRITY.

brother, we all suffer from source of anxiety. what you have to do is think clearly and pinpoint where this anxiety is coming from. anxiety stems from fear. if you do not take control over this fear, this fear will control your life and you will not be able to function. depression... we all go through times of sadness. it is normal. do this: go on various news sites and just read the countless stories of terrible tragedies taking place all over the world. then think about how much worse those people have things than you do. thus making you grateful, because it could be worse for you. failure... nobody wants to fail. i will say this: if you believe you are going to fail, you will. and if you don't fail, you gave your competition an advantage from the beginning. believe that you are a winner. fear of rejection... we all fear that in a way. when rejection hits you, you just have to move on. things don't always come to us, sometimes we have to come to it. just think, those same people that may reject you, have most likely face rejection too. i don't know what to say about mediocrity.

my brother has been dealing with what you are dealing with now. all these things i tell you i told my brother. you wanna know what his psychiatrist said? he said: your brother is right!!!

 

[enoch]

:salam2:

Jazakallah everyone for your wonderful advice and suggestions

alhamdulillah I feel a lot better and I will try my level best to make changes in my life.

 

[a_stranger]

Please let us hear from you, we get a lot of strength from being together, pray for each other islam calls for unity based on faith in Allah subhanahu wa taala.

 

[katieanneb]

Assalemu alaikom,

When children are abused or exposed to family conflicts they so often think that they are the reason, the one who is to blame for all the upheavals in their lives. This, along with the psychological damage done by family members, either deliberately or inadvertently, can cause life-long problems for children as they grow up with feelings of guilt and self-hate. Part of coping with a destructive past is to recognise that the child who was, was(in most cases) not and is not responsible for what happened. This is the key to making a fresh start in life. We all have psychological baggage, some of us, for some divine reason seem to go through more than others, but Allah is always there to accept us back into the fold, to allow us to cleanse our souls, and move forward. Anyone who has been fortunate enough to be Muslim, I mean here by conviction, is indeed lucky,(if that's the right word here) as they have the tools to replenish their humanity, to detox, to become born again (sorry for the cliche)! So my dear friend, understand just how much Allah loves you, He has given you a chance to rid yourself of the past, the pain and burden put on your shoulder by elders. Alhamdoulillah, despite the pain and hurt, you can make it, with the aid of Allah, and the dear brothers and sisters here and around you, whose sincerity is inspiring. I wish you all success in your journey and just remember Allah is mightier than any black magic or evil, so put your trust in Him, worship Him as He deserves, and He will never let you down.

Salem.