Why having girlfriend/boyfriend is illegaler in Islam?

[Omidjan]

:salam2: dear brothers and sisters;;

Hope is doing well, as I mentioned on the Title, This is my question.

Here is someone who is Christian, it is more clear for you then me that What types of relations Islam has, but how ever I explain to him about Islamic laws, he doesn't accept and keeps asking me "Why you don't have a girlfriend?" I am so tired of his question. What ever I say does not convince him.

So, if any body has any good advice and answer to convince this Christian that would be your big favor to me, and I would appreciate it a lot.

Assalamu Aliakum Wa Rahmatullahe Wa Baraktuh!!!

Omid....

 

[Abel213]

:salam2:

Tell your friend that girlfriend relationship leads to kissing/sex which is against Islam. A girlfriend is temporary and leads to breakup and sadness, but a wife gives you a more permanent happiness.

His own Bible says :


Ephesians 5:3
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people. (NIV)

Ecclesiastes 11:9-10
9 Rejoice, young man, during your childhood, and let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood. And follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. Yet know that God will bring you to judgment for all these things. 10 So, remove grief and anger from your heart and put away pain from your body, because childhood and the prime of life are fleeting.

1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
3 For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4 that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5 not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God;

1 Peter 2:11
Beloved, I urge you as aliens and strangers to abstain from fleshly lusts which wage war against the soul.

2 Timothy 2:22
Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

1 Cor 6:18-19
18 Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body. 19 Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?

Romans 13:13-14
Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy. 14 But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.

 

[safiya58]

Family is very important in Islam. It is like a social base. Islam wants the muslims to get married and get children. to protect the institution of marriage Islam forbits havig a girlfriend/boyfriend. in the west where ít is not usual to get married the people have to worry about their futur because the birthrates getting smaller and smaller. so there are much more old people than young.

 

[Salem9022]

Less and less people getting married in America, They have a carreer a nice car, 3 or 4 girlfriends, and they think they have a good life, until they get old. Thats why it's important that we Muslims follow our religion because the whole society breaks apart when you deviate from the straight path, Like with dating. Imagine getting married with a person who was kissed by someone and someone who lost their virginity by some other person, and the kids will probably grow up thinking that Mommy had a boyfriend before she got married with their daddy and their mommy kissed and did all of those things with her boyfriend who wasn't their daddy. wallah this is what happens, thats why you don't see alot of self-esteem from the kids especially the girls when they grow thinking their father and mother had other partners before they were born. And they imitate their parents because they think this is how you get love by going out and showing your skin to get attention.

 

[safiya58]

Less and less people getting married in America, They have a carreer a nice car, 3 or 4 girlfriends, and they think they have a good life, until they get old. Thats why it's important that we Muslims follow our religion because the whole society breaks apart when you deviate from the straight path, Like with dating. Imagine getting married with a person who was kissed by someone and someone who lost their virginity by some other person, and the kids will probably grow up thinking that Mommy had a boyfriend before she got married with their daddy and their mommy kissed and did all of those things with her boyfriend who wasn't their daddy. wallah this is what happens, thats why you don't see alot of self-esteem from the kids especially the girls when they grow thinking their father and mother had other partners before they were born. And they imitate their parents because they think this is how you get love by going out and showing your skin to get attention.

I don´t agree with u in some points. u could offend people with your post. A converted lady for example what if she commited sins and has repented is she allredy fouled in your eyes? but If Allah forgives her and covers her sins why should her children think about that. Isn´t it stupid? Or what is when someone gets raped? I agree sexuell intercourse is something awful but I can´t unterstand why u concentrate specially on the `mommy`? Daddy also kissed and did all of those things... Sex is not just for men it is also for women. Sorry for being that direct.

 

[Salem9022]

I was speaking about the Kuffar, not about the reverted muslim brothers and sisters, of course their past sins are forgiven, I wasn't talking about them. As for just concentrating on the mother, No not only the Mother but also the father, thats what I said. Children look at their parents and imitate them and when they find out how their parents got together they try to imitate their lifestyle and behaviours before they got married, so no, not only the mothers, sorry for the confusion

 

[Salem9022]

And whats more disgusting is that their parents promote this, for instance they dress them up on their Prom Nights so they can get drunk and dance with their boyfriends and girlfriends, This is the what happens and being promoted. With total disregarde for lineage etc. And the thing is. Imagine your parents dressing you up in a night where you will be going out with someone you are not married with and where possibly you could loose your virginity and honor, what kind of parents will they be to do this their kids? very loose society and after all this they call themselves moral christians lol

 

[Abel213]

I agree with Salem, it's disgusting. You can't even say anything about it anymore because you'll be called "close-minded". Even the Westerners are embarrassed about their culture now. When their young they have fun having sex with whoever they want. f they get in trouble, they just kill the baby(that's what it is so don't sugarcoat it). The parents and grandparents have given up trying to tell them or teach them because the religion of " child psychology" is that kids will always be good no matter what and at most need a time-out. The rest of the world just sort of laughs at their methods, we all know that kids are some of the greediest, selfish beings.

They usually cheat or end up being cheated on by their spouses which leads to the current 50% divorce rate in the US and 70% in Sweden. When their old they are disposed of by their children and the cycle repeats. Can you understand how it feels to get old and see death coming at you with no escape? It would feel awful not to have a plan toward entering Heaven and being back with your family, friends and loved ones again.

(Quran 14:3) Those who love the life of this world more than the Hereafter, who hinder (men) from the Path of Allah and seek therein something crooked: they are astray by a long distance.

 

[A Kashmiri]

Sallam Alaikum brother,

Islam believes in a society which is free from crime, and there is peace and stability that is why anything which is related to anything which is a social evil or leads and created social evil is forbidden in Islam. Free intermingling of males and females is not encouraged in Islam because of many ill effect which not only have effect on the individual themselves but affect the society at large.

Tell you friend how uncontrollable the western society has become because they either allowed all ill and evil things like Gambling, Alcholism, Free Sex, Prostitution, drugs, gangs and what not etc etc etc.... There are thousands of things on the list. All these things have left westerners society corrupt and without a moral life.

As one of the brother above has quoted various verses from their Holy Book - Bible , but I am sure he will be shocked to hear these verses in their Bible which he doesnt know. ( Even if he may be a Christian Crusader -missionary )

I hope that your friend is not a missionary ( Christian Crusader) , who have failed to bring their own houses in order and want to corrupt people who are better than them individually and at society level.

 

[safiya58]

I was speaking about the Kuffar, not about the reverted muslim brothers and sisters, of course their past sins are forgiven, I wasn't talking about them. As for just concentrating on the mother, No not only the Mother but also the father, thats what I said. Children look at their parents and imitate them and when they find out how their parents got together they try to imitate their lifestyle and behaviours before they got married, so no, not only the mothers, sorry for the confusion

now I know what you mean. u r totally right. sorry for misunderstanding u hope u will forgive me.

 

[cmelbouzaidi]

and we can also say that casual physical relationships cause great suffering and disease.... sadly, many teenagers in the US have these incurable diseases before they even reach adulthood and that is a sad truth of western society today. islam only forbids what is not good for us because Allah, the Almighty, loves us so and wants us to have self respect.