With relation to beards, and parents

[Fenix10]

Assalamualaikum Wa rahmatullahi wa burakatu,

This question has been answered many times, I'm sure, but I have a somewhat difficult case. You see, I've been growing my beard for the past month or so, and refused to shave it regardless of the pleas of my relatives and friends. Now, however, my beard has become noticeable enough to come under my parent's attention, and they are literally begging me to shave it off. I'm not sure what to do at this point, though I have adamantly refused for the time being. However, they ask me to do this very often, and I'm really at loss about what to do with it.

I'm well aware of this hadith, which is the reason I keep my beard in the first place:

Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) said "I have no connection with one who shaves, shouts and tears his clothing eg. in grief or affication."
- Reported by Abu Darda (R.A.) in Muslim, Hadith no. 501

But is it possible for me to shave the beard for the time being? I intend to grow it back as soon as I am able.

May Allah forgive us all. Jazakullahu'Khair.

 

[Ershad]

Assalamu Alaikkum wa rahamatullahi wa barakatuhu,

I am happy that you know that it is good to follow the Prophet . And also one more fact, "The messenger doesn't speak from his desires." He let his beard grow and ordered us to do so. There is definitely some wisdom behind the beard. If you contemplate, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala gave beard only for the men and not to women, for a reason. It is not something that is extra in the men. It is a part of creation. And if he chose to give it to men and not women, there is definitely a great wisdom behind it. Also, beard is part of dignity of men. Also, beard keeps you warm .

However, coming to your question, If you intend to grow it back, and when it grows, don't you think your parents will have a problem with it again and you will have to shave it again? So, will you be shaving it again and again? Definitely, Shaving your beard is not permissible. Let me give you a advice- Be firm in your decision but advice your parents kindly.

Most of the young men have to go through this phase and probably all their life, to fight for the beard. If you think, beard is something insignificant to fight for, think again. Once you convince them kindly, believe me, it will go unnoticed and people will forget your face when it was without beard. You will become more familiar with beard and people will find you strange without it. It is just the initial mental block.

Remember, every change comes with a resistence. And everytime, you succumb to the resistence, you fall a lot of steps back and you should start from scratch. People hate change - good or bad. But, if you live through this initial storm, I hope everything will be fine and people won't have problems with your beard.

 

[thariq2005]

Wa `alaykum salaam wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuh

As the messenger of Allaah :saw2: said: “There is no obedience if it involves disobedience towards Allaah; obedience is only in that which is right and proper.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (7257) and Muslim (1840). And he said: “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards Allah, may He be glorified and exalted.” Narrated by Ahmad (1089).

I suggest you speak to your parents in a kind manner and tell them about what Islaam wants from yourself and what the parents are required to do, from an islamic perspective. Intiating a good deed in a family that does not practise that good deed, can get very difficult. But once you overcome the pressure and people realize you are on the truth- they will start accepting you. And inshaa'Allaah Allaah will guide your family through your own actions.

And rememeber, every person that follows you in that good deed- you will be rewarded for it.

 

[Seeking Allah's Mercy]

Wasalamo`Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Baarakaatuh,

If you give in now, later would be harder. If you stick to it now, there would be no later, hard or soft. Game will be set and done.

This is something that almost every Muslim face when he brings a change not only in his Ibaadah (Not many care about how long or how much you pray) but also his actions and appearances. Starting on Hijaab, Niqaab or a beard-incase of men-is a problem. But if you won't resist now, the problem becomes greater. Your parents are bound to give in. Be kind to them, advice them politely and turn it into a joke to avoid their anger. Most importantly make duas so that Allaah makes it easier for you.

BaarakAllaau feek.

 

[Fenix10]

Jazakullahu'Khair everyone, thank you for your advices :salam2:

 

[strive-may-i]

:salam2:
Beard is better indeed, but let it not become the only sign of your Imaan... There are many aspects of deen, give each due attention... Be gentle and firm, may you succeed in your endeavor ... Ameen!