Boyfriend/Girlfriend in Islam?

[Asja]

there will be atleast 2 hoors for each believer in Jannah. and martyrs will have 72 hoors. also scholars says that maybe we will get more as Allah will fulfill all our wishes in Jannah. thats y i used the word "lots".

hope its clarified now.

:salam2:

jazzak Allah khair dear brother for your explination.

But "two" is not a loot. I only wanted to point on that,Insh"Allah.

May Allah bless you

 

[Mrmuslim]

salaam alikom

I hope these videos will help you

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[The_truth]

Assalamualakum

Hi i have a question

Well i am in school and i know a girl that i just talk to you know joke around always nothing more.

The issue came when i heard you cant be friends with girls? Correct me if im wrong

I only do one thing with the girl and that is talk and joke around as i would never go beyond that im not like other guy's that are totally obsessed with women. Wustaqfirullah i would never put myself in a situation where it goes beyond talking etc...

So my question is the typical girlfriend image is

*Kissing
*hanging out
*love without intention to marriage
*Going to place together holding hands
(Wustaqfirullah)

I do not do any of those with her nor do i have the intention. So my question is, Is this still Haram i cant talk to them at all? Whats the limit.

Jazakallah Khairan

P.S- The only time i heard you are aloud to have a girlfriend etc..is when you have the intention to marry and cant be for intercourse etc... By the way this doesnt apply to this girl im just wondering this is what i heard my brother say
Is this true?


And Allah Knows best

Asaalamu alaikum wr wb, brother the reason why it is haraam to talk to befriend the opposite sex is for the very reason that it usually starts with an innocent friendship and then usually leads onto to more. Men and women are created to be attracted to each other and if your friends with the opposite sex then its inevitable that you will start liking them for who they are and then eventually things will happen.
A hadith says that when a man and a women are alone together then shaythan is always htere with them as the third person.
Shaythan will eventually lead you to do haraam with her as he has done with countless others in the same way.
Its always the same story. People think its harmless and ok to socialise and be friends with the opposite sex and before they know it they have fallen for that person and then commit so many haraams with them and surely regret it later.
Nowadays my brother it is very sad to see the state of our Muslim youth who even by the age of 16 have had several relationships including sexual ones. Don't ever think its normal to hang around with and befriend girls for that is what shaythan wants to re-assure you on but it is a deception.
Don't let the peer pressure and the fact that other people around you have friends who are girls and have girlfriends themselves pressure you into conforming with what they do.
If they disobey Allah then will you do the same? If they want to fall into destruction then will you do the same?
My brother this is the month where we should be trying to get the closest to Allah because it is easier to pray and do good acts.
Get the habit of Salaah and other good actions now and it will be easier to continue doing them throughout the year and that way you would want to stay clear of doing haraam like befriending girls and going out with them. Salaah is the most important action that we need to undertake as Muslims in our daily lives everyday and it is like meeting with Allah 5 times daily.
Get the habit of it now that your young because you do not know when you will die and it is harder to get into the habit of it later on in life thats if you live that long. Many don't live that long so brother the time to change and go towards Allah is now for we may not live to see tomorrow.
Get close to Allah my brother not a girl. Be friends with Allah and not a girl for the girl will lead you to destruction and will waste SO much of your precious time because the youth is such a precious time when we are rewarded the most for our good deeds and good actions and if we stay away from haraam then we will set ourselves up for a life of doing good inshallah. So this is the time we should be trying to build up our imaan (Faith) and strive to get close to Allah then he will help us and bless us in every single aspect of our lives.
If you have any other questions then please don't hesitate to ask.
I have pasted a some very benificial links for you to gain more knowledge about the issue of boyfriend and girlfriend in Islam and also a link which will try to help you and build your imaan (Faith).

10 Steps to Increasing our Iman(Faith)

http://www.turntoislam.com/forum/showthread.php?t=47335

Having a Girlfriend: Permissible?

http://www.islamawareness.net/Marriage/fatwa_02.html

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...h-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503545452

Talking with Members of the Opposite Sex

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...h-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaE&cid=1119503546580

Mixing Between Men and Women

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...nglish-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaEAskTheScholar

How Should a Muslim Woman Conduct Herself?

http://www.islamonline.net/servlet/...nglish-Ask_Scholar/FatwaE/FatwaEAskTheScholar

 

[xSharingan01x]

:salam2:

You shouldn't be saying things such: "Sweet Girls..." or "Avoiding a Girlfriend". Brother you shouldn't be even talking non-sense such as this. If that girl would be your sister, would you like me saying: "Its hard to avoide that sweet girl"....no right?

You are going off and breaking your own advise into pieces.

:salam2:

You're being way too literal in your interpretation of brother Ahemed_indian's comment.
I think brother Ahmed_Indian was referring to the qualities that make female appear appealing to our eyes, and he is right. It can be quite difficult to stop talking to someone who I may find 'sweet', 'intelligent', 'attractive', and what not.

I mean, why do we like people or find them amicable? Even brothers for that matter. I will prefer to hang out with a brother who's Islam is very strong, he is intelligent, and has a good influence on me compare to a brother who is very lax in his ways.

p.s. That brother in the video, Joshua Evans came to my Masjid on Friday for iftar. A very kind brother.

 

[ahmed_indian]

:salam2:

You're being way too literal in your interpretation of brother Ahemed_indian's comment.
I think brother Ahmed_Indian was referring to the qualities that make female appear appealing to our eyes, and he is right. It can be quite difficult to stop talking to someone who I may find 'sweet', 'intelligent', 'attractive', and what not.

I mean, why do we like people or find them amicable? Even brothers for that matter. I will prefer to hang out with a brother who's Islam is very strong, he is intelligent, and has a good influence on me compare to a brother who is very lax in his ways.

p.s. That brother in the video, Joshua Evans came to my Masjid on Friday for iftar. A very kind brother.

thank u a lot brother for understanding my words in proper context...jazaak Allah khairan

may Allah bless u in both the worlds.

 

[xSharingan01x]

:salam2:

Brother Bukhari, you're missing the point. These are linguistic terminologies, and you're being way too technical in your understanding of brother Ahemed_Indian and my post. We are simply using those words to describe something, that doesn't mean we ourselves are indulging in what you're describing in your post.

 

[ahmed_indian]

Yes Brother, thats what I again reminded you in the previous post that I understand the feeling and that I am giving the Ruling regarding it and not offending you. Please read the full post. Secondly, Brother, I know you are describing the post of brother Ahmed_indian, on the other hand you are also supporting that what he said was right, then tell me, why did he said: "Sweet girls". because thats how they are, you would propably say that. Brother, on the other hand you are supporting it, that whatever he said about our sisters was completely fine, but brother I may warn you, Its absulotely not precise.

brother, scholars advice their students that " if you see some charming woman on the street, lower your gaze", or " dont fall into having a girlfriend, fear Allah".

so do u mean they are all wrong in using these words?

u think they are doing a bad job? i dont think so!

 

[a_stranger]

For pure healthy hearts

يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لَا تَتَّبِعُواْ خُطُوَٲتِ ٱلشَّيۡطَـٰنِ*!ۚ وَمَن يَتَّبِعۡ خُطُوَٲتِ ٱلشَّيۡطَـٰنِ فَإِنَّهُ ۥ يَأۡمُرُ بِٱلۡفَحۡشَآءِ وَٱلۡمُنكَرِ*!ۚ وَلَوۡلَا فَضۡلُ ٱللَّهِ عَلَيۡكُمۡ وَرَحۡمَتُهُ ۥ مَا زَكَىٰ مِنكُم مِّنۡ أَحَدٍ أَبَدً۬ا وَلَـٰكِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُزَكِّى مَن يَشَآءُ*!ۗ وَٱللَّهُ سَمِيعٌ عَلِيمٌ۬ (٢١)


O ye who believe! Follow not the footsteps of the devil. Unto whomsoever followeth the footsteps of the devil, lo! he commandeth filthiness and wrong. Had it not been for the grace of Allah and His mercy unto you, not one of you would ever have grown pure. But Allah causeth whom He will to grow. And Allah is Hearer, Knower. (21)

Quran Surat All-noor

 

[a_stranger]

For pure healthy hearts

قُل لِّلۡمُؤۡمِنِينَ يَغُضُّواْ مِنۡ أَبۡصَـٰرِهِمۡ وَيَحۡفَظُواْ فُرُوجَهُمۡ*!ۚ ذَٲلِكَ أَزۡكَىٰ لَهُمۡ*!ۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ خَبِيرُۢ بِمَا يَصۡنَعُونَ (٣٠) وَقُل لِّلۡمُؤۡمِنَـٰتِ يَغۡضُضۡنَ مِنۡ أَبۡصَـٰرِهِنَّ وَيَحۡفَظۡنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبۡدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنۡهَا*!ۖ وَلۡيَضۡرِبۡنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَىٰ جُيُوبِہِنَّ*!ۖ وَلَا يُبۡدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا لِبُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوۡ ءَابَآٮِٕهِنَّ أَوۡ ءَابَآءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوۡ أَبۡنَآٮِٕهِنَّ أَوۡ أَبۡنَآءِ بُعُولَتِهِنَّ أَوۡ إِخۡوَٲنِهِنَّ أَوۡ بَنِىٓ إِخۡوَٲنِهِنَّ أَوۡ بَنِىٓ أَخَوَٲتِهِنَّ أَوۡ نِسَآٮِٕهِنَّ أَوۡ مَا مَلَكَتۡ أَيۡمَـٰنُهُنَّ أَوِ ٱلتَّـٰبِعِينَ غَيۡرِ أُوْلِى ٱلۡإِرۡبَةِ مِنَ ٱلرِّجَالِ أَوِ ٱلطِّفۡلِ ٱلَّذِينَ لَمۡ يَظۡهَرُواْ عَلَىٰ عَوۡرَٲتِ ٱلنِّسَآءِ*!ۖ وَلَا يَضۡرِبۡنَ بِأَرۡجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعۡلَمَ مَا يُخۡفِينَ مِن زِينَتِهِنَّ*!ۚ وَتُوبُوٓاْ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَ ٱلۡمُؤۡمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمۡ تُفۡلِحُونَ (٣١)



Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do. (30) And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and be modest, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, and to draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornment save to their own husbands or fathers or husbands' fathers, or their sons or their husbands' sons, or their brothers or their brothers' sons or sisters' sons, or their women, or their slaves, or male attendants who lack vigour, or children who know naught of women's nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn unto Allah together, O believers, in order that ye may succeed. (31)


Quran surat All-noor

 

[a_stranger]

Our high exampleurer for hearts

يَـٰٓأَيُّہَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُواْ لَا تَدۡخُلُواْ بُيُوتَ ٱلنَّبِىِّ إِلَّآ أَن يُؤۡذَنَ لَكُمۡ إِلَىٰ طَعَامٍ غَيۡرَ نَـٰظِرِينَ إِنَٮٰهُ وَلَـٰكِنۡ إِذَا دُعِيتُمۡ فَٱدۡخُلُواْ فَإِذَا طَعِمۡتُمۡ فَٱنتَشِرُواْ وَلَا مُسۡتَـٔۡنِسِينَ لِحَدِيثٍۚ إِنَّ ذَٲلِكُمۡ ڪَانَ يُؤۡذِى ٱلنَّبِىَّ فَيَسۡتَحۡىِۦ مِنڪُمۡۖ وَٱللَّهُ لَا يَسۡتَحۡىِۦ مِنَ ٱلۡحَقِّۚ وَإِذَا سَأَلۡتُمُوهُنَّ مَتَـٰعً۬ا فَسۡـَٔلُوهُنَّ مِن وَرَآءِ حِجَابٍ۬ۚ ذَٲلِڪُمۡ أَطۡهَرُ لِقُلُوبِكُمۡ وَقُلُوبِهِنَّۚ وَمَا كَانَ لَڪُمۡ أَن تُؤۡذُواْ رَسُولَ ٱللَّهِ وَلَآ أَن تَنكِحُوٓاْ أَزۡوَٲجَهُ ۥ مِنۢ
بَعۡدِهِۦۤ أَبَدًاۚ إِنَّ ذَٲلِكُمۡ ڪَانَ عِندَ ٱللَّهِ عَظِيمًا (٥٣)




O Ye who believe! Enter not the dwellings of the Prophet for a meal without waiting for the proper time, unless permission be granted you. But if ye are invited, enter, and, when your meal is ended, then disperse. Linger not for conversation. Lo! that would cause annoyance to the Prophet, and he would be shy of (asking) you (to go); but Allah is not shy of the truth. And when ye ask of them (the wives of the Prophet) anything, ask it of them from behind a curtain. That is purer for your hearts and for their hearts. And it is not for you to cause annoyance to the messenger of Allah, nor that ye should ever marry his wives after him. Lo! that in Allah's sight would be an enormity. (53)


Quran Surat Alahzab