PeArLL
-Quiet Member-
Ofcourse sister, a marriage without the daughter's consent is invalid. What I mean is talk the parents through gently, so they feel more comfortable to a cross cultural marriage. .
I Agree....
Ofcourse sister, a marriage without the daughter's consent is invalid. What I mean is talk the parents through gently, so they feel more comfortable to a cross cultural marriage. .
Assalaam walaikum,
So help me out...what do you say to soften the hearts of the parents so they see that this is a pious brother.
Assalaam walaikum,
Brother,
My concern becomes that we start to walk on thin ice. So many many parents get stuck on their own culture and do not see the bigger picture. Forget global there are many parents who are still village struck.
:salam2:
I don't know how it happened........(no bad intention though)
This the third time i'm saying this on tti........
I AM SORRY
I will refrain from saying anything like that again.Thank you very much for explaining.. You are an intelligent brother.:mashallah:
:salam2:
Something to refresh your eyes.(especially for Aapa and Helpinghumanity.)
Wait, is that.... a blue rose?
:salam2:
Something to refresh your eyes.(especially for Aapa and Helpinghumanity.)
Wait, is that.... a blue rose?
Wassalamo`Alaum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Baarakaatuh,Assalaam walaikum,
Can I not be called SAM, please. JazaakAllaahu khayraa.So..lets talk parents...this is for Sis SAM,
My previous post had nothing to do with this and I don't agree with that, not to mention this isn't really being discussed, I'm talking about respect to parents. If at all they are at fault, we are obliged to give Dawah politely. But tryna act the complete Know-it-alls and displaying them as evil ignorant beings is waaay to satanic,insane and inhuman to begin with.You know sometimes, parents get so caught up in the saving face, must keep it in the same class and whatever rung of ladder you are on; I have seen it all..right skin tone, right weight, right height...ok we have all laughed at the requirements.
When a believer is presented as a potential spouse they do not agree, so let me beg you:
What does a believing daughter say to her father. A father that has loved her and spoilt her. She has kept to her deen. She has obeyed her parents. She has been kind and faithful to everyone. Allah subhana taala sends her a potential brother. He has faith. Lordy, lordy,lordy, does this brother have faith. You know the genuine, 100% rock solid faith. Ok... so he ain't perfect, and he ain't gonna give her the house with the SUV, but he strives to please Allah...
How do you convince the father of the young Muslimina that this is the right brother. I need help on this one. What hadith do I use. What ayat do I use. How do you tell a father that Allah has sent the right and pious brother to love and protect his daughter.
Totally agree with you sister. We need to understand where the parents are coming from. I was talking to an elderly lady, who is from (X country) , and her daughter is teaching in (Y country). She told me she would not want her daughter to marry from (Country Y), which I am from too. She explained, no offence to you, but I don't speak the language and would not know how to communicate with the son in law. Also another worry parents have, that the daughter/son leave to their spouse's country, which means seeing less of their children and grandchildren. generally older people feel more comfortable with what is familiar; the language, the culture. .
Not in all cases, we should keep that in mind.Islam came to liberate women. A sister has the right in deciding.
Wa-alaikum assalam,Assalaam walaikum,
Sister Seeking Allah's Mercy
You have to live with that person. Not your momma.
Sister..you present issues that are cultural. Why do present a female as an object. Is that how you see yourself? An object of your parents whims and desires?
So if a girl moves away with her husband..we have something called transportation. Cars, trains, and planes.
Sister...you have made me smile..someone of us are bold and need adventure.
Sure brother, no son/daughter should be balckmailed in any shape or form, and forced into a marriage.
There are no guarantees of happiness in life anyway, whether the parent have found the potential or they came through any other decent way, but one just needs to do their best.We needn't think that many times a girl might tell her parents about someone is when she is having some form of interaction, for instance online or other. There are times when a friend or someone could recommend a certain person, and the girl would introduce the idea to her parents. However, the parents shouldn't be quick to dismiss because of culture or any other issues, whether for their son/daughter.
They need to give the issue a proper thought in order to see the overall picture, and find that balance of what is best for their son/daughter although there may be compromises. If the potential meets the criteria, religiously and morally, and it means a lot to their son/daughter then to go ahead and offer that compromise inshallah, and Allah is rewarding, swt. The son /daughter need to recognise and appreciate difficulty for the parents , if for instance there was a reason the parents were initially against, such as reasons discussed in previous posts.