friend or foe?

[omahmed]

Salaamu Aleikum

I was in Australia recently doing an exam. I met a middle aged Arab woman with her children, and we began talking and became friends. She had just been recently divorced and her children would visit her every weekend. I was busy studying but we would sometimes sit and chat, or go out to a mall together. About a week before I came back home, she began hinting that she had met someone. The hints became more pointed, and she finally told me she had met a man and loved him. I said, Good, you can get married, insha'Allah. Err..it turns out that she had no intention of getting married to him, and she strongly implied she was having a relationship with him. I was shocked, to be honest, and asked her didn't she know this was haram, wasn't she afraid of Judgement Day, etc, but she brushed it all off, and said, Even the good people will be punished that day. I tried to talk sense into her, but I had to leave shortly after. Now my question is: Should I keep in touch with this woman and keep trying to make her see sense (it would be by phone or email, as I am back home with my family) - or is it better to never have contact with her again?

Thanks for your time,

Salaamu Aleikum

 

[Asja]

Assalamu allaicum wa raahmatullah wa barakatuhu dear sister.

I think you should try to advice your friend with patinete and explain her that what she is doing is haram and big sin infront of Allah subhane we teala,and that she should do tawba to Allah,and to not get back never again to that man,and to this sin, Inshallah. If she honestly repent, Allah will forgive her Inshallah,and if she ask of Allah, Allah will reword her with good Muslim man like her husband,the one who do not do big harams and who is feared of Allah.

May Allah bless you and help you dear sister.:tti_sister:

Wa Allaicumu salam wa raahmatullah wa barakatuhu

 

[faaraa]

Of course...as Human beings we all fail to forgive our friends and relatives when they commit mistakes...and we start hating them too some times...
BUT..
ALLAH AZZAWAJAL...THE MOST MERCYFUL forgives every one if they repent...SUBHANALLAH....
So in my point of view, nothing of your feelings (Anger or friendship) are gonna make a different in your friend's choice... BUT....INSHA ALLAH your advise might change her some times..your examples might change her some times
so be with her...and always show her the ways..
BUT MY DEAR SISTER......THIS IS MY ADVISE TO YOU ....I DON'T WANNA HURT YOU BUT JUST ADVISE YOU...
WHEN YOU ATTEMPT TO HELP HER EMOTIONALLY...
BE CAREFUL DEAR..I MEAN YOU ONLY, SHOULD BRING DIFFERENCE IN HER SELF...AND DO NEVER LET HER TO OVER POWER YOU.....
ALLAH AZZAWAJAL KNOWS THE BEST
FEE AMANILLAH

 

[ShahnazZ]

Don't give up on her. Guide her and inshAllah she'll come to her senses. Based on the information you've given us about her, it's possible that she may not be in a good place right now emotionally and she isn't thinking clearly. Irrespective of her current emotional state, I think it's best that you maintain contact with her so that you can provide constant dawah. Make dua for her and just be there for her so that she knows that she has you to turn to in case she does decide to take your advice.

Remember, as Muslims, we don't want to come off as rigid and lacking compassion. You want her to see that you care about her and her well being. But as stated previously by others, do NOT let her start influencing you as well. If she tries to and you feel that you're being swayed by her opinions, then turn back and turn back fast.

Yes, it is your duty to give her dawah but in the end if she tries to bring you down with her, then you put yourself first and get out of that situation.

 

[saima abdullah]

aasalam o alykum wr wb
keep in touch with her such "relationships" have nothing to do with reality its a timly lust...see the proper time and talk to her in proper time when she will face the reality of all this she will be in need of you,,then give her advice right now she is under anesthesia of evil,,, and dont forget to do duwa for her

 

[Amir_of_spain]

Everyone commits sins. When it comes to social sins we tend to get shocked more, i never realise why so espeically when compared to bigger major sins such as injustices, violations of human rights, killings, racism which occur more frequently. Anyhow keep in touch with her and use that opportunity to give advice and dawah.

Amir

 

[omahmed]

Salaam

Thanks very much for all your kind advice. I will contact her tomorrow insha'Allah, and see how she's doing. I admit that this did make me feel uneasy - perhaps I've been living too long in a community where this rarely happens (or else I don't know about it, anyway). I did tell her this was just a fleeting fancy for him, and she would feel used at the end, but she just wasn't in the right frame of mind at the time to hear me. I'll try again, insha'Allah.

May Allah Protect us all, insha'Allah.

Jazaakum Allah Khair, and Salaamu Aleikum.

 

[aslamjiffry]

Salaams...

Keep in Touch...... Dont give up..... Try to convince her using ur own stratergies and always talk about the life of Prophet Muhammed SAW(PBUH) and also explain her that Islam show the correct path everytime and tell her she has life though she divorced... Explain her the Islamic Way...That mean After divorce Need to stay Idda and she can start a new life in halaal way by getting re marry...

 

[Afthab]

Salam

Assalamualaikum Brother!

May Allah subhana wa'thaala guide everyone to straight path Aameen.

And brother what we should know is that Allah (SWT) is certainly the most just.... And By Allah him self knows best and will do the just to each and every human being according to their intentions and what they have done. In this regard what i would say is that, obviously its your duty to tell her what islam says about this and avoid contact with non mehram (Ajnabi) woman for its clearly mentioned in the holy quran about the relationship with gender issues.

Fear Allah genuinely for he deserves to be feared.

 

[omahmed]

Salaam brother Athab

I'm a sister, BTW. I'm married and have children, one daughter in university and one son in high school, al hamdulillah. But thank you for your concern. Jazzak Allah Khair insha'Allah

 

[omahmed]

And I'm sorry - I misspelt your name! Salaam brother Afthab.