Assalamu alaykum.
Dear sis,
May Allah reward you for all you go through. Remember always that after ever hardship there is ease. Whether it's in this life or the next.
Don't try to forget because i feel that personally, your memories make you who you are. Just forgetting won't change your mother's feelings. I have many relatives who are Muslim, yet they deny Islam... it hurts but there's nothing you can do.
I mean Allah has given you Hidaya, what a blessing! Don't feel bad about anything you do, as you will be rewarded for it one day inshallah. Your mother is maybe one of your dearest of kin and we all know that without mothers we wouldn't be here... so don't give up on her, try to help her as much as you can.
Make dua, and don't give up on that either, because Allah knows what you do not. Maybe what you want, really wouldn't be good, Allah knows best. Put your complete trust in Him... whatever happens to you or your family has already been written down by the Almighty.
And when My slaves ask you concerning Me, then I am indeed near (to them by My Knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicants when he calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor). So let them obey Me and believe in Me, so that they may be led aright." [al-Baqarah 2:186]
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Whoever seeks to be patient, Allaah will give him patience." (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 1376).
He (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) also said: "Knowledge comes by learning and patience comes by making oneself be patient." (Reported by al-Daraqutni and others; classed as hasan in Saheeh al-Jaami', 2328).
Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The du’aa’ of any one of you will be answered so long as he is not impatient and says, ‘I made du’aa’ but it was not answered.’” Narrated by al-Bukhaari and Muslim.
And always remember sis, Muslims are your family... and I love you for the sake of Allah.
From your little sis in Islam,
Fi aman allah.
Wassalam.