Assalaam walaikum,
My brothers and sisters..we have a Believer amongst us. He wishes to become a member of the Ummath. He has been honest with us. He makes dua to the All Compassionate One..and whatever is granted is an immediate Blessing. And as the Brother suggested please let us more forward in an humble manner.
Every one of our five fingers are different, with different abilities, just as we are as a community of people. There are people who sometimes think they have reached the 'top' (what is the top anyway?) of the ladder, and it gets to them so bad, they forget how big a fall they can have. I have come across many such people, my most recent experience with a family friend who wouldnt accept that a certain Ayah was from a particular Surah, although the Quran was open in front of her. She stood on her horse and said the text made a mistake - a result of her 'confidence', or shall I give it another name? Its okay to make mistakes, we all do, and always will. Just our nature - were humans. As they say, if you haven't made a mistake in life, you haven't made anything. From our mistakes and experiences, life shows us a lesson in every move. Many will change their ways, many will not, but those who are brave enough to change their ways are usually the most successful.
Arthur Ashe, a black American tennis player, died in 1993. Success was written all over his face, his family was his happiness, his career his passion, and his reputation - the biggest possession he ever owned. Within the last decade of his life, he contracted HIV from a blood transfusion during heart surgery. He announced this a year before his death, and it shocked the world to know a man like him could be the victim of such a disease. Many were quick to judge, to ridicule, to mock and throw harsh words like a sharp sword at the man who claimed over and over that his reputation was his life, and any stain on it meant failure in every field. Get my drift?
As for judging and giving advice... some replies were a shocker. If our Brother has trusted us to one of his deepest worries, do we simply shun him with bitter words and harsh comments, or honour that trust above everything and give him the utmost support we can, be it a nice word or two? There are many who speak like theyre on cloud nine, but one day, when it comes to us, when were suffering and we have to, wth difficulty, extend a hand for help, that day we will know true pain - where on one side we have a challenging burden, and the other, loneliness and no help from people we once considered our Brothers and Sisters. Undoubtedly, Allah will always be there for us, in the silence, in the darkness when our pillows are sometimes the only means of drying our tears and knowing Allah is above us gives us that light we need, BUT we live among people, we need a shoulder, warm company and words of wisdom from those who know better. We need each other. We easily tell others to repent, but before that, we should look down into our own shirts too, we shouldnt let hypocricy get the better of us. Lose the pride, be humble and soft, treat others the way you want to be treated because what goes around, comes around.