In Need of Strength

[seeking_the_truth]

My husband and I married in April and all has been pretty good. However, now i am facing a trying time. My husband will be leaving soon to go to another state to find work. He is working here but feels that he needs to go to this other state to hopefully do better for us both. He has friends there that have set him up with a job however, he doen't know what he will be paid. I am concerned that he will get down there and it not be what his friends have made it sound like. He told me that if he doesn't like it he will be back in a month but if he does he will stay down longer 5 or 6 minths and that we may end up moving there afterwards. This area is know for alot of devistation due to mother nature in the last few years and i worry that if we do move there that we will constantly have to pick up as storms head towards that area. I have told my husband that i will support him in whatever he feels is the right thing to do and i will. I will follow him anywhere that he feels will help us. I just worry about being apart for him for so long. I have never lived by myself and don't care to but i will always support my husband in anything he feels is right. I just need the extra support and strength to endure this time that is coming.

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,


Your strenght lies in Allah subhana talla. He is the Disposer of All Affairs. Please put your trust in Him.
Often when men feel the need to prove themselves they do stupid things. If you persist it will make him seek stupidity harder. I am sorry for being so brutal. In a non-judgemental tone ask him about the facts and figures. How much will he make..where will he live..how will he save money...And then let it go.
You have to be patient. You have to be strong. One of the benefits of living by yourself is you get to spend time with yourself. You learn how little you need. Take this time, be it a month or several, to grow. Read or do volunteer work...take a class on line...take a class through the local schools..sew..join a book club. do something at the masjid. Heaven knows they always need to be organized or cleaned,but expand your personal horizons. Take this time to renew your relationship.
You sound as if you respect each other. Now take this brief separation as a vacation. Enjoy yourself. Let me know if this makes sense.

 

[palestine]

Sister hold tight. i know that you will miss your husband so much and that's sweet of you to be so caring of your husband but inshaAllah just keep up hope. don't despair. call him whenever you can to talk to him, and when you are with him make the most of your time and let him know you care and you'll miss him. asalamu alaykum wrwb and may Allah make you zawjatu saliha(a pious wife), i think you already are.

 

[seeking_the_truth]

thank you both. I have asked him how much he will be making and he isn't sure yet until he gets there. He will be staying with freinds at first and eventually get a place with aonther friend who is going down there with him. I always let him know how much he means to me and he knows because i have told him that i will miss him so very very much. As for keeping myself busy That part is well covered now. As i am a full time student, work full time, and work out at the gym to loose weight. As it is now we rarely see one another we are passing ships in the night you could say. I have told him i support him and i do but i still worry about it all. However, i know that if he doesn't go he will always wonder. So inshaAllah all will work out. As for calling him i will do that also however he has never been one to call me or answer the phone often when i call it has always been this way even when we were dating which is very difficult to deal with. I have stressed to him to call me and how important it will be for us to talk on the phone to one another, inshaAllah he will keep that in mind but i never know how his mind works:lol: