Wa alaykum Salam,
To swear an oath on Allah, by saying Wallahi is a big big thing.
Sometimes you will see Arab or other Muslims always using Wallahi in every sentence. This is incorrect. It should only be used on very important issues.
To do so on a lie, is much worse and a sin.
Also, it is common to hear that those who use Wallahi a lot, are liars.
To Reconcile people, i.e. to stop fighting it is something that is allowed, but as Shaykh Ibn Baz (rahimahullah) says, it is for very severe issues, such as you wish to stop someone physically harming another person etc
Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
What is prescribed for the believers is to use oaths sparingly, even if they are true, because swearing oaths a great deal may cause him to end up lying, and it is known that lying is haraam, and if a lie is accompanied by an oath, it is even more haraam. But if necessity or shar’i interests dictate that a false oath be sworn, there is no sin in that, because it is proven in the hadeeth of Umm Kalthoom bint ‘Uqbah ibn Abi Mu’eet (may Allaah be pleased with her) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “He is not a liar who reconciles between people, conveying good messages and saying good things.” She said: I did not hear him grant any concession concerning anything that the people say of lies except in three cases: reconciling between people, war, and what a man says to his wife, or a woman says to her husband. Narrate by Muslim in al-Saheeh.
If a person says in order to reconcile between people, “By Allaah, your companions want to reconcile, they want to come to an agreement, they want such and such,” then he goes to the others and says something similar, with good intentions and aiming to bring about a reconciliation, there is no sin in that, because of the hadeeth quoted above.
Similarly, if he sees someone who wants to kill another person unlawfully, or to wrong him in some other way, and he says, “By Allaah he is my brother,” in order to rid him of this wrongdoer who wants to kill him unlawfully or beat him unlawfully, because he knows that if he says that he is his brother, he will leave him alone out of respect for him, then he has to say such a thing in the interests of saving his brother from injustice and wrongdoing.
To conclude: the basic principle concerning false oaths is that they are haraam, except in cases where they will serve a greater purpose than lying, as in the three cases mentioned in the hadeeth quoted above.
End quote.
click below for full answer:
Majmoo’ Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 1/54.
But, you must remember that fatwa such as this above is general, your friend's husband is really flouting Allah's rules by doing these things....... and he continues to do this. It seems he has made an excuse and the big problem with this is that nobody will know when he is saying truth and when he is lying. -
Wasalam.
