Feeling frightened

muhammad.abdullah

muhammad.abdullah

Junior Member
:salam2:

my dear sisters and brothers i hope you are all fine. I am going to get married soon inshallah. I dont know when but its gonna be in a few months time inshallah. I am really scared. I dont know why but i am literally shaking in my boots. I dont earn lots of money but i know i earn enough to support another person with me. What I fear most is, will i be able to become a good husband? Will i be able to keep her happy? Will she understand me? I love her alot and thats what frightens me most about her, i dont want to see her sad with me or regret the marriage. You guys must be thinking that there is something wrong but its not. I am a caring person and i want to see her smiling all the time. May Allah make this easy for me...

wasalam, your scared brother :(
 
BintMuhammad

BintMuhammad

New Member
Staff member
muhammad.abdullah said:
:salam2:

my dear sisters and brothers i hope you are all fine. I am going to get married soon inshallah. I dont know when but its gonna be in a few months time inshallah. I am really scared. I dont know why but i am literally shaking in my boots. I dont earn lots of money but i know i earn enough to support another person with me. What I fear most is, will i be able to become a good husband? Will i be able to keep her happy? Will she understand me? I love her alot and thats what frightens me most about her, i dont want to see her sad with me or regret the marriage. You guys must be thinking that there is something wrong but its not. I am a caring person and i want to see her smiling all the time. May Allah make this easy for me...

wasalam, your scared brother :(
Click to expand...

:salam2:

Aww poor brother is scared. Insha Allaah brother, everything would turn out well. I really didn't believe that guys actually gets scared too before they get married :p Well, as much as I would wanna give you an advise, I really can't relate to it as you need a brother's perspective and ofcourse someone married. Just don't forget to make Du'a
 
muharram23

muharram23

New Member
Staff member
assalamu alaykum,
akhi i got married last year and i cant say how beatiful it is. There is nothing to be nervous or scared about. Just know that marriage is half of the religion. Shaytan is scarring you like everyone else when its time to get married. Shaytan knows that when a person gets married, he cant play with him as he could before. InshaALlah know that u will be rewarded if your marriage is sincere for the sake of Allah s.v.a, if you are doing it to please Allah .s.va and stay away from haram. That is the sunnah of Resullulah s..v.a. REsulullah s.v..a said that who ever of you can get afford to get married, he should do so and who ever can't, then should fast.
Know that your future wife is scared probabaly just the way you are, if not more :). Know that there will be testing in your marriage. Know that things want always be great, but that's life. Learn how to be a good husband as well your future wife should learn how to be a good wife in islam. Your intentions both should be to marry for the sake of Allah and to please only Allah. If marriage is for anything else, then your intentions will be for what you intended.
Keep praying istikhara salah before you do anything especially before getting married. Don't just pray it day before marriage, but keep praying it starting tonight. :) Siince its ramadan, and Allah s..va is more merciful in this month then any other time, you should take advantage of it. May Allah s.va. put khair between you and ur future wife and inshaAllah bring good muslim offspring. inshaAllah ameen

Muharram
 
muhammad.abdullah

muhammad.abdullah

Junior Member
Alhamdulillah, my family proposed to her family after doing istikhara... so i am quite fine on this issue, its just that i feel i cant keep her happy, maybe i am totally oblivious of a woman's nature...
 
M

Muslim4Destiny

New Member
No Worries

muhammad.abdullah said:
Alhamdulillah, my family proposed to her family after doing istikhara... so i am quite fine on this issue, its just that i feel i cant keep her happy, maybe i am totally oblivious of a woman's nature...
Click to expand...

:salam2:

Akhi as long as your intentions are sincere and you have the financial means to raise a family pray istikhara and go for it; A lot of things shall fall in place but make sure that besides ISLAM you have other interests in common. May Allah guide you.:)
 
muharram23

muharram23

New Member
Staff member
Akhi woman is created from a rib. If you try to streighten it out, ull break it, and if you leave it as it is, it will remain cruked. :). Ok, akhi dont worry she is not a monster :) She has feeling like you. U will understand her nature once you spend some time with her. Trust me is not that scary. Fear Allah!!!

Assalamu alaykum
muharram
 
najbc

najbc

Junior Member
Assalam

I too did not know guys get scare or worry:) . do not worry brother, everythings will work out and your future wife will be happy. who knows she might be thinks and worry like you now. insuallah everything will be perfect, well nice. take care.
 
Durriyyah

Durriyyah

Forever Student
:salam2:

Allah will guide you brother, it sounds like you know she is a good woman and one thing a woman needs is to know she is appreciated. One thing... she won't be smiling ALL the time, there are going to be times where she is crabby or irritated. Sometimes it might be your fault... I'm not trying to sound mean but this is life in this dunya and things happen. You are not expected to keep her happy 100% of the time but learn from times where she is not happy.

As a sister I can tell you that there are times where we don't even know why we are upset, but we are. It is just life. Learn patience and it will go a long way. We have to learn this with the brothers as well.
 
A

Abdul Hasib

Student of Knowledge
Don't worry bro I kinda got scared during my uncles wedding this summer.

And my cousin got married too, last year in November.

Gosh and after I first saw my Dulla Baya (when I went to London this summer) the first sight I was getting nervous. I would always feel shy around him, (like during dinner) and especially whenver he looked at me because he always smiled at me. :p Gosh I felt so embarrassed. I like him though. He looks nice too. :D Such a nice face that I would always stare at him.
But you know if you like someone, and then if both of you look at each other (and especially if they smile sweetly), you always stare down out of embarassment. Well, that's hoe I felt.

Gosh he had such a nice face. A beautiful beard, he was a Hafiz, always wore his Panjabi and Kufi.

And then after our first week in London (and then we left), I would always think of him, and I regretted that I never spent some time with him.

And then when we had to go to London again (cause our connceted flight was canceled. [The flight to America cause the Biman only goes to London, can't go to America] but anyway, when we went to London again) I've started talking to him.

Man he loved listening to me talk. Him and my cousin would always laugh when I said something funny, and I especially remember one night during dinner. :D

So, we were having dinner, and then my KAlo, my cousin and I started talking and I said something funny, and then my cousin (girl cousin) and Dulla Baye was cracking up. Gosh I got so embarrassed that I accidently walked into the door after putting my plates away. :D

And after we left London, I've been thinking about Baya. I've even started crying that I couldn't spend more time with him. Gosh I wish that I could've given him a nice little brother hug. You know a hug a little kid gives you and they're putting their head on your stomach.

I wish we could've walked to the park, then I would've been holding his hand, and he could out his arms around me.

At home I could've put my head on his lap and let his soft warm hand touch my face. I 've always been thinking that.

Now the next time I see him I wish I could put my hands around him and I know that I would cry and soak his clothes with my tears because he feels so precious to me.

May Allah give him a happy life. I love him For the Sake of Allah, I wish he would be my companion for eternity and in Jannah, I wish that I could've admitted to him that he's precious than a jewel to me. I wasn't even able to tell him these before we left London.

I kept pestering him to come downstairs outside so I could spend my last seconds with him, and he came. Before I walked into the car I hugged him. I couldn't even cry that time, but I knew that I would've been crying on the plane for him.

May Allah give him Jannah, to the Big Brother that I finally had. Ameen
 
BintMuhammad

BintMuhammad

New Member
Staff member
:salam2:

Awww...I enjoyed reading that though I was confused at first :p I pray you see each other again AMEEN.

Abdul Hasib said:
Don't worry bro I kinda got scared during my uncles wedding this summer.

And my cousin got married too, last year in November.

Gosh and after I first saw my Dulla Baya (when I went to London this summer) the first sight I was getting nervous. I would always feel shy around him, (like during dinner) and especially whenver he looked at me because he always smiled at me. :p Gosh I felt so embarrassed. I like him though. He looks nice too. :D Such a nice face that I would always stare at him.
But you know if you like someone, and then if both of you look at each other (and especially if they smile sweetly), you always stare down out of embarassment. Well, that's hoe I felt.

Gosh he had such a nice face. A beautiful beard, he was a Hafiz, always wore his Panjabi and Kufi.

And then after our first week in London (and then we left), I would always think of him, and I regretted that I never spent some time with him.

And then when we had to go to London again (cause our connceted flight was canceled. [The flight to America cause the Biman only goes to London, can't go to America] but anyway, when we went to London again) I've started talking to him.

Man he loved listening to me talk. Him and my cousin would always laugh when I said something funny, and I especially remember one night during dinner. :D

So, we were having dinner, and then my KAlo, my cousin and I started talking and I said something funny, and then my cousin (girl cousin) and Dulla Baye was cracking up. Gosh I got so embarrassed that I accidently walked into the door after putting my plates away. :D

And after we left London, I've been thinking about Baya. I've even started crying that I couldn't spend more time with him. Gosh I wish that I could've given him a nice little brother hug. You know a hug a little kid gives you and they're putting their head on your stomach.

I wish we could've walked to the park, then I would've been holding his hand, and he could out his arms around me.

At home I could've put my head on his lap and let his soft warm hand touch my face. I 've always been thinking that.

Now the next time I see him I wish I could put my hands around him and I know that I would cry and soak his clothes with my tears because he feels so precious to me.

May Allah give him a happy life. I love him For the Sake of Allah, I wish he would be my companion for eternity and in Jannah, I wish that I could've admitted to him that he's precious than a jewel to me. I wasn't even able to tell him these before we left London.

I kept pestering him to come downstairs outside so I could spend my last seconds with him, and he came. Before I walked into the car I hugged him. I couldn't even cry that time, but I knew that I would've been crying on the plane for him.

May Allah give him Jannah, to the Big Brother that I finally had. Ameen
Click to expand...
 
H

hussain.mahammed

a lonely traveller
Abdul Hasib said:
Don't worry bro I kinda got scared during my uncles wedding this summer.

And my cousin got married too, last year in November.

Gosh and after I first saw my Dulla Baya (when I went to London this summer) the first sight I was getting nervous. I would always feel shy around him, (like during dinner) and especially whenver he looked at me because he always smiled at me. :p Gosh I felt so embarrassed. I like him though. He looks nice too. :D Such a nice face that I would always stare at him.
But you know if you like someone, and then if both of you look at each other (and especially if they smile sweetly), you always stare down out of embarassment. Well, that's hoe I felt.

Gosh he had such a nice face. A beautiful beard, he was a Hafiz, always wore his Panjabi and Kufi.

And then after our first week in London (and then we left), I would always think of him, and I regretted that I never spent some time with him.

And then when we had to go to London again (cause our connceted flight was canceled. [The flight to America cause the Biman only goes to London, can't go to America] but anyway, when we went to London again) I've started talking to him.

Man he loved listening to me talk. Him and my cousin would always laugh when I said something funny, and I especially remember one night during dinner. :D

So, we were having dinner, and then my KAlo, my cousin and I started talking and I said something funny, and then my cousin (girl cousin) and Dulla Baye was cracking up. Gosh I got so embarrassed that I accidently walked into the door after putting my plates away. :D

And after we left London, I've been thinking about Baya. I've even started crying that I couldn't spend more time with him. Gosh I wish that I could've given him a nice little brother hug. You know a hug a little kid gives you and they're putting their head on your stomach.

I wish we could've walked to the park, then I would've been holding his hand, and he could out his arms around me.

At home I could've put my head on his lap and let his soft warm hand touch my face. I 've always been thinking that.

Now the next time I see him I wish I could put my hands around him and I know that I would cry and soak his clothes with my tears because he feels so precious to me.

May Allah give him a happy life. I love him For the Sake of Allah, I wish he would be my companion for eternity and in Jannah, I wish that I could've admitted to him that he's precious than a jewel to me. I wasn't even able to tell him these before we left London.

I kept pestering him to come downstairs outside so I could spend my last seconds with him, and he came. Before I walked into the car I hugged him. I couldn't even cry that time, but I knew that I would've been crying on the plane for him.

May Allah give him Jannah, to the Big Brother that I finally had. Ameen
Click to expand...

Masha Allah dear brother abdul hasib, enjoyed reading it. May Allah bless you and your family.

wa/salam
 
H

hussain.mahammed

a lonely traveller
muhammad.abdullah said:
:salam2:

my dear sisters and brothers i hope you are all fine. I am going to get married soon inshallah. I dont know when but its gonna be in a few months time inshallah. I am really scared. I dont know why but i am literally shaking in my boots. I dont earn lots of money but i know i earn enough to support another person with me. What I fear most is, will i be able to become a good husband? Will i be able to keep her happy? Will she understand me? I love her alot and thats what frightens me most about her, i dont want to see her sad with me or regret the marriage. You guys must be thinking that there is something wrong but its not. I am a caring person and i want to see her smiling all the time. May Allah make this easy for me...

wasalam, your scared brother :(
Click to expand...

As salamu alaikum wa rahmtullahi wabrakatuhu dear brother

Dont get scared and keep yourself saying that Allah Subhanahu wa Taala is with you. Make duas as much as possible and ask forgiveness from Allah Subhanahu wa Taala. Insha Allah He will make things easier for you. May Allah bless you and your family.

wa/salam
 
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