A couple serious questions about lowering your gaze.

[tru follower]

Ive searched and never found the answers to my questions so i am here to ask you wise folks on what you believe, dont make the answers up, just tell me what you know as a fact, thanks in advance. Here are my questions: Is it a sin to look at someone and look back at them by accident? Can you gaze at women/men on tv? Can you gaze at your own gender? Can you gaze at the opposite sex or your own gender when you conversate with them? These are all the questions i have, and thanks for everyone that responds, may Allah bless you all.

 

[tru follower]

can somebody please answer my questions? thank you

 

[xSharingan01x]

Ive searched and never found the answers to my questions so i am here to ask you wise folks on what you believe, dont make the answers up, just tell me what you know as a fact, thanks in advance. Here are my questions: Is it a sin to look at someone and look back at them by accident? Can you gaze at women/men on tv? Can you gaze at your own gender? Can you gaze at the opposite sex or your own gender when you conversate with them? These are all the questions i have, and thanks for everyone that responds, may Allah bless you all.

:salam2:



I don't know the answer to your last few questions. Perhaps some one who is knowledgeable can shed more light on the subject.

About gazing @men and women on TV : Refer to the second piece from Islam Q&A


Here is what I found at Islam Q&A, hopefully this helps.



First and second glance at women
I know it is absolutely forbidden to gaze at women. If one accidentally catches my eyes sometimes I keep looking for a second or two and then I remember Allaah's command and immediately look down .
My question is for that very little time that I do look at the lady do I earn sins?
I was reading in Yusuf Qradawai's halaal wal haraam fil Islam that the Qur'aan says lower the gaze, and that the gaze is defined by "carressing the eyes with her beauty or thinking lustful thoughts while looking ". Alhamdulillaah, I have never gone to this point inshaa-Allaah . But I am worried about those two seconds . May Allaah bless you


Praise be to Allaah.

Jareer ibn ‘Abdullaah said: "I asked the Messenger of Allaah (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) about an accidental glance at a woman. He commanded me to turn my gaze away." (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, who said: This is a saheeh hasan hadeeth. See al-Sunan, 2700).

Commenting on this hadeeth, al-Mubaarakpoori said: " ‘Accidental’ means that his gaze fell on a non-mahram woman unintentionally. ‘He commanded me to turn my gaze away’ means that he was not to look a second time, because the first glance was not by choice and would be forgiven, but any further glances would be counted as sin, and he should heed the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): ‘Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)…’ [al-Noor 24:30]"

The Messenger of Allaah (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) said: "O Ali, do not follow a glance with another, for you will be forgiven for the first, but not for the second." (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 2701; see Saheeh al-Jaami’, 7953)

In al-Tuhfah, he said: "The words ‘do not follow a glance with another’ mean do not look again after the first glance. ‘You will be forgiven for the first’ means that you will be forgiven if the first glance was unintentional, and ‘but not for the second’ means that because the second glance was by choice, it will be counted against you."

So it is clear that deliberately looking at a non-mahram woman and continuing to look after a first accidental glance is haraam. It is forbidden to look at any part of her body, whether you think she is beautiful or not, whether it provokes sexual desire or not, whether it is accompanied by evil thoughts or not, and whether it leads to immoral deeds or not.

We ask Allaah to protect you and us from all haraam deeds. Allaah is the One Who guides to the Straight Path.

Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid





Ruling on watching TV
Is watching TV permitted in Islaam ? If so under what coditions ?

Praise be to Allaah.

The issue of watching films is not free from numerous reservations from a shar’i point of view, such as uncovering ‘awraat, listening to music, spreading corrupt beliefs and calling for imitation of the kuffaar. Allaah has commanded us to lower our gaze, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is All-Aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts)” [al-Noor 24:30-31].

Since lowering the gaze is the basis of protecting the private parts, it is mentioned first. Allaah has made the eyes the reflection of the heart: if a person lowers his gaze, the desire in his heart will be reduced, but if a person looks and stares, the desire in his heart will be provoked.

In Saheeh Muslim (1218) it is reported that Al-Fadl ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) was riding behind the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) on the Day of Sacrifice (Yawm al-Nahr) from Muzdalifah to Mina, when some women riding on camel-borne sedan chairs passed by. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) turned his [al-Fadl’s] head away. This was prevention and denunciation through action, for if looking were permissible he would have approved of what he did.

In Saheeh al-Bukhaari (6343) it is reported that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Every son of Adam has his share of zinaa decreed for him, and he will undoubtedly get his share. The eye commits zinaa and its zinaa is looking. The tongue commits zinaa and its zinaa is speaking; the feet commit zinaa and their zinaa is walking; the hands commit zinaa and their zinaa is touching. The heart longs and desires for something and the private parts confirm that or deny it.”

He began by mentioning the eye because this is how the zinaa of the hand, foot, heart and private parts begins. By mentioning the zinaa of the tongue, he pointed out that the mouth can commit zinaa by speaking. And he stated that the private parts can confirm that if they make the deed happen, or deny it if that does not happen.

This hadeeth gives the clearest indication that the eye can sin by looking and that this is its zinaa. This is a refutation to those who say that looking is allowed in all circumstances.

It was also reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “O ‘Ali, do not follow a look with a second, for the first look is allowable but not the second.”

A look has the same effect on the heart as an arrow has on its victim. If it does not kill him, it will wound him. It is like a spark of fire in dried grass; if it does not burn all of it, it will still burn some of it. May Allaah have mercy on the one who said:

“Everything starts with a look, and big fires start from little sparks.

How often has a heart been dealt a fatal blow like that of an arrow, with no need for a bow.

As long as a man’s eyes are looking around, looking into the eyes of others, he is in a state of danger.

His eye delights in that which could destroy his heart. The joy that may lead to harm is not welcome.”

Hence Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in al-Fataawa 3/227:

With regard to television, it is a dangerous device and its harmful effects are very great, like those of the cinema, or even worse. We know from the research that has been written about it and from the words of experts in Arab countries and elsewhere enough to indicate that it is dangerous and very harmful to Islamic beliefs (‘aqeedah), morals and the state of society. This is because it includes the presentation of bad morals, tempting scenes, immoral pictures, semi-nakedness, destructive speech, and Kufr. It encourages imitation of their conduct and ways of dressing, respect for their leaders, neglect of Islamic conduct and ways of dressing, and looking down on the scholars and heroes of Islam. It damages their image by portraying them in an off-putting manner that makes people despise them and ignore them. It shows people how to cheat, steal, hatch plots and commit acts of violence against others. Undoubtedly anything that produces so many bad results should be stopped and shunned, and we have to close all the doors that could lead to it. If some of our brothers denounce it and speak out against it, we cannot blame them, because this is a part of sincerity towards Allaah and towards other people.

Whoever thinks that this device (TV) can be free of these evils and can be used only for good purposes if it is censored properly is exaggerating and is making a big mistake, because the censor may miss things and most people nowadays want to imitate the foreigners. It is very rare to find censors who are doing their job properly, especially nowadays when most people are only interested in time-wasting entertainment and things that turn people away from true guidance. Reality bears witness to that.

We ask Allaah to keep us safe from all evil for He is the Most Generous.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

 

[tru follower]

thanks alot for your info my brother, i really appreciate it, you answered one question but the rest remains, when you talked about watching tv, i understood why its bad, but you can always look away when u see negativity or change the channel, but my question about tv is if you can gaze at males/females. and if someone can answer the rest of my questions that are posted on the 1st post. thanks all my brothers/sisters, you guys are truly guiding me to the right path, thanks again....

 

[Hard Rock Moslem]

Gazing at same sex...you may check what is your intention first. Today we have this lesbian and gay issue everywhere so if you talking about gazing at same sex in this context then definitely it is forbidden.

The Messenger (saw) said: "The reward of deeds depends upon the intentions and every person will get the reward according to what he has intended".

 

[tru follower]

thanx for your insight, do you know if you can gaze at the other persons face whether it be a male or female if you are talking with them? thanks again

 

[Hard Rock Moslem]

thanx for your insight, do you know if you can gaze at the other persons face whether it be a male or female if you are talking with them? thanks again

I don't understand your question. Anyway, I still remember my ustaz said first gaze at opposite gender is a "gift" and subsequent gaze is an offence if the intention was wrong. Following Hadith may helps you:

Narrated by 'Abdullah:
The Prophet (saw) said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power."

Abu Huraira 'narrated from the Prophet (saw) who said "Allah has written for Adam's son his share of adultery which he commits inevitably. The adultery of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the adultery of the tongue is the talk, and the inner self wishes and desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it."

Correct me if I'm wrong.

Allah knows best.

 

[q8penpals]

Assalam aliekum

For me, I guess the problem is the definition of "gaze" - I think of gazing as prolonged looking for a romantic purpose - "She gazed into the eyes of her husband...."

Or is the Islamic definition of gaze to mean simply look at. For instance, when I hold a parent-teacher conference with a father, I don't stare at the floor or the wall, but make what I would consider to be a normal amount of eye contact to be polite, between looking at him, the child, and the paperwork; that's it. Is that considered "gazing" by Islamic standards?

So, Islamically, is "gazing" romantic looks, or is gazing ANY looks, at a person of the opposite gender?

Lana

 

[muthmainnah]

thanx for your insight, do you know if you can gaze at the other persons face whether it be a male or female if you are talking with them? thanks again

When you are talking to your opposite gender try not to stare at her/him. You still can turn your face at her/him but turn away your eyes from looking at her/him continuously (by seeing other directions -you know what I mean, don't you?)
Practise makes perfect...so then, it's better to practice my suggestion, for the first time maybe it looks hard but it will become easier, Insha Allah.

 

[tru follower]

muthmaina thank you so much for the info, but let me get this clear, so you can look a couple times here and there but you cant stare? is that what you mean?

 

[muthmainnah]

muthmaina thank you so much for the info, but let me get this clear, so you can look a couple times here and there but you cant stare? is that what you mean?

Yes,that's what I mean. But I think it will better for us to avoid eye contact when talking to our opposite sex. I still try hard on it. Just don't stare at her/him. Ok?

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,


I am not a scholar. So let us take it real slow. When you look at something..you stop time...you define your world by looking at the object. It could be a piece of candy. The object thus becomes larger than it is. It occupies your mind. The more you look at it the more you want it. That is the reasoning behind adverstisments. You become obsessed by it. You can not eat or sleep until you have it. You could lose your mind for wanting it.

Thus it becomes necessary for you to lower your gaze and avoid temptation. What Allah subhana talla has Willed for you is yours.

Everything else is lust.

 

[tru follower]

thanks for answering most of my questions my friends, my last questions are can you look at someone, look away like your supposed to and look at them again by accident, would that be a sin? and when you get married, is it a sin to stare at your mate?

 

[AISHA14]

can someone help........

 

[923577]

plz answer my questions

as we all know that masturbation is a bad habit i want to know that its realy a sin if yes than how can we get rid of it and wat is the proof

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,

You become the rainment of your spouse. The realtionship is sacred. You can feast looking at your spouse.


There is proof that mastrubation is not good. Fast and get married. There have been posts on this subject before.check those out.

 

[a_stranger]

lowering gaze

There are means which help a person to lower his gaze, and we ask Allah to help you to do them:


1 – Bearing in mind the fact that Allah is watching you, that He sees you and is with you (by His knowledge) wherever you go. It may be a secretive glance of which your closest neighbor is unaware, but Allah knows of it: “Allah knows the fraud of the eyes, and all that the hearts conceal.” (Ghafir:19)


2 – Seeking the help of Allah, beseeching Him and calling upon Him. Almighty Allah says: “And your Lord said: Invoke Me [i.e. believe in My Oneness (Islamic Monotheism) and ask Me for anything] I will respond to your (invocation).” (Ghafir: 60)


3 – You should know that every blessing you enjoy comes from Allah, and requires that you should give thanks for it. Part of being grateful for the blessing of sight means that you should protect it from looking at that which Allah has forbidden. Is there any reward for a good deed, other than good? “And whatever of blessings and good things you have, it is from Allah.” (An-Nahl: 53)


4 – Striving with your self and training yourself to lower your gaze and be patient in doing so, and never giving up. Allah says: “As for those who strive hard in Us (Our Cause), We will surely guide them to Our paths.” (Al-`Ankabut: 69) The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever seeks to be chaste, Allah will make him chaste, and whoever seeks to be independent of means, Allah will make him independent of means, and whoever strives to be patient, Allah will make him patient…” (Al-Bukhari)


5 – Avoiding places where a person feels he will be exposed to the temptation of looking, if he can manage to avoid them, such as going to marketplaces or malls, and sitting idle in the street. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Beware of sitting in the street.” They said, “We have no alternative; that is where we sit and talk.” He said, “If you insist on sitting there, then give the street its rights.” They said, “What are the rights of the street?” He said, “Lowering the gaze and refraining from causing offence…” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).


6 – You should realize that you have no choice in this matter, regardless of what the circumstances are and no matter how great is the temptation or motive to do evil, and no matter what emotions and overwhelming desires stir within your heart. You must lower your gaze and refrain from looking at forbidden things in all places and at all times. You cannot use excuses such as the environment being corrupt, or justify your mistakes by saying that you are surrounded by temptation.


7 – Doing a lot of voluntary acts of worship, because doing a lot of them whilst also regularly doing the obligatory acts of worship is a means of protecting one's physical faculties. According to a hadith qudsi (Divine), Allah said: “… and My slave continues to draw close to Me with supererogatory works so that I shall love him. And when I love him, I am his hearing with which he hears, his seeing with which he sees, his hand with which he strikes and his foot with which he walks. Were he to ask (something) of Me, I would surely give it to him, and were he to ask Me for refuge, I would surely grant him it.” (Al-Bukhari)


8 – Remembering that the earth on which sin is committed will bear witness for or against us. Allah says: “That Day it will declare its information (about all that happened over it of good or evil).” (Az-Zalzalah: 4)


9 – Bearing in mind some of the texts which forbid one from letting the gaze wander freely, such as the verse in which Allah says: “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things).” (An-Nur: 30)


10 – Avoiding unnecessary looks, so that you only look at what is needed to look at, and you do not allow your gaze to wander right and left so that it falls upon something the effects and temptation of which cannot be got rid of quickly.


11 – Marriage is one of the most effective remedies. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “Whoever can afford it, let him get married, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and in guarding one’s chastity. And whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” (Al-Bukhari and Muslim).


11 – Remembering al-hur al-`een (maidens in Paradise), which will motivate you to be patient in avoiding that which Allah has forbidden, hoping to obtain this blessing. Allah said: “Companions of equal age.” (An-Naba': 33) And the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "If a woman of the people of Paradise were to look out over the people of this earth, it would light up everything in between and fill it with fragrance, and the veil of her head is better than this world and everything in it.” (Al-Bukhari)


12 – Bearing in mind the shortcomings of the one who attracts you...



13 – Checking yourself from time to time and striving to make yourself lower your gaze whilst being patient, realizing that everyone makes mistakes.


14 – Thinking of the pain and regret that will result from this looking, and the negative effects of allowing one’s gaze to wander.


15 – Understanding the benefits of lowering one's gaze, as mentioned above.


16 – Bringing up this topic during meetings and gatherings, and explaining its dangers to others.


17 – Advising your relatives, telling them not to wear clothes that attract attention and show their beauty, such as how they dress, wearing bright colors, how they walk, speaking too softly, etc.


18 – Warding off passing thoughts and the whispers of Satan before they take hold and are acted upon. Whoever lowers his gaze after the first glance will be saved from innumerable problems, but if he continues to look he cannot be certain that seeds that will be difficult to remove, will not be planted in his heart.


19 – Being afraid of an evil end, and of a feeling of great regret at the point of death.


20 – Keeping the company of good people, because you are naturally affected by the characteristics of the people you mix with, and a person will follow the way of his close friend, and a friend will pull you to follow his way."


Excerpted, with slight modifications, from: www.islam-qa.com

 

[a_stranger]

THE GREAT VIRTUE OF LOWERING THE GAZE



By Imaam ibn al-Qayyim

Taken from �al-Muntaqaa min Ighaathatul Lufhaan fee Masaayid ash-Shaytaan� [pp.�s 102-105] of ibn al-Qayyim, summarised by Alee Hasan







Allaah, the Exalted said,



�Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their private parts; that will make for greater purity for them. Indeed Allaah is well acquainted with all that they do.� [an-Nur (24):30]



So Allaah made purification and spiritual growth to be the outcome of lowering the gaze and guarding the private parts. It is for this reason that lowrering ones gaze from (seeing) the prohibited things necessarily leads to three benefits that carry tremendous value and are of great significance.



The First: experiencing the delight and sweetness of faith.



This delight and sweetness is far greater and more desirable that which might have been attained from the object that one lowered his gaze from for the sake of Allaah. Indeed, �whosoever leaves something for the sake of Allaah then Allaah, the Mighty and Magnificent, will replace it with something better than it.� {1}



The soul is a temptress and loves to look at beautiful forms and the eye is the guide of the heart. The heart commissions its guide to go and look to see what is there and when the eye informs it of a beautiful image it shudders out of love and desire for it. Frequently such inter-relations tire and wear down both the heart and the eye as is said:



When you sent your eye as a guide

For your heart one day, the object of sight fatigued you

For you saw one over whom you had no power

Neither a portion or in totality, instead you had to be patient.



Therefore when the sight is prevented from looking and investigating the heart finds relief from having to go through the arduous task of (vainly) seeking and desiring.



Whosoever lets his sight roam free will find that he is in a perpetual state of loss and anguish for sight gives birth to love (mahabbah) the starting point of which is the heart being devoted and dependant upon that which it beholds. This then intensifies to become fervent longing (sabaabah) whereby the heart becomes totally dependant and devoted to the (object of its desire). Then this further intensifies and becomes infatuation (gharaamah) which clings to the heart like the one seeking repayment of a debt clings firmly to the one who has to pay the debt. Then this intensifies and becomes passionate love (ishk) and this is a love that transgresses all bounds. Then this further intensifies and becomes crazed passion (shaghafa) and this a love that encompasses every tiny part of the heart. Then this intensifies and becomes worshipful love (tatayyuma). Tatayyum means worship and it is said: tayyama Allaah i.e. he worshipped Allaah.



Hence the heart begins to worship that which is not correct for it to worship and the reason behind all of this was an illegal glance. The heart is now bound in chains whereas before it used to be the master, it is now imprisoned whereas before it was free. It has been oppressed by the eye and it complains to it upon which the eye replies: I am your guide and messenger and it was you who sent me in the first place!



All that has been mentioned applies to the heart that has relinquished the love of Allaah and being sincere to Him for indeed the heart must have an object of love that it devotes itself to. Therefore when the heart does not love Allaah Alone and does not take Him as its God then it must worship something else.



Allaah said concerning Yusuf as-Siddeeq (AS),



�Thus (did We order) so that We might turn away from him all evil and indecent actions for he was one of Our sincere servants.� [Yusuf (12): 24]



It was because the wife of al-Azeez was a polytheist that (the passionate love) entered her heart despite her being married. It was because Yusuf (AS) was sincere to Allaah that he was saved from it despite his being a young man, unamarried and a servant.



The Second: the illumination of the heart, clear perception and penetrating insight.



Ibn Shujaa` al-Kirmaanee said, �whosoever builds his outward form upon following the Sunnah, his internal form upon perpetual contemplation and awareness of Allaah, he restrains his soul from following desires, he lowers his gaze from the forbidden things and he always eats the lawful things then his perception and insight shall never be wrong.�



Allaah mentioned the people of Lut and what they were afflicted with and then He went on to say,



�Indeed in this are signs for the Mutawassimeen.� [al-Hijr (15): 75]



The Mutwassimeen are those who have clear perception and penetrating insight, those who are secure from looking at the unlawful and performing indecent acts.



Allaah said after mentioning the verse concerning lowering the gaze,



�Allaah is the Light of the heavens and the earth.� [an-Nur (24): 35]



The reason behind this is that the reward is of the same type as the action. So whosoever lowers his gaze from the unlawful for the sake of Allaah, the Mighty and Magnificent, He will replace it with something better than it of the same type. So just as the servant restrained the light of his eye from falling upon the unlawful, Allaah blesses the light of his sight and heart thereby making him perceive what he would not have seen and understood had he not lowered his gaze.



This is a matter that the person can physically sense in himself for the heart is like a mirror and the base desires are like rust upon it. When the mirror is polished and cleaned of the rust then it will reflect the realities (haqaa`iq) as they actually are. However if it remains rusty then it will not reflect properly and therefore its knowledge and speech will arise from conjecture and doubt.



The Third: the heart becoming strong, firm and courageous.



Allaah will give it the might of aid for its strength just as He gave it the might of clear proofs for its light. Hence the heart shall combine both of these factors and as a result, Shaytaan shall flee from it. It is mentioned in the narration, �whosoever opposes his base desires, the Shaytaan shall flee in terror from his shade.� {2}



This is why the one who follows his base desires shall find in himself the ignominy of the soul, its being weak, feeble and contemptible. Indeed Allaah places nobilty for the one who obeys Him and disgrace for the one who disobeys Him,


�So do not lose heart nor fall into despair; for you must gain mastery if you are true in faith.� [Aali Imraan(3): 139]



�If any do seek for nobilty and power then to Allaah belongs all nobility and power.� [Faatir(35): 10]



Meaning that whosoever seeks after disobedience and sin then Allaah, the Might and Magnificent, will humiliate the one who disobeys Him.



Some of the salaf said, �the people seek nobilty and power at the door of the Kings and they will not find it except through the obedience of Allaah.�



This is because the one who who obeys Allaah has taken Allaah as his friend and protector and Allaah will never humiliate the one who takes his Lord as friend and patron. In the Du`aa Qunut their occurs, (the one who You take as a friend is not humiliated and the one who You take as an enemy is not ennobled.)

 

[Aapa]

Salaam,


Jazaak Allahu Kharin for your post, Brother Stranger.

 

[muthmainnah]

as we all know that masturbation is a bad habit i want to know that its realy a sin if yes than how can we get rid of it and wat is the proof

Ruling on masturbation and how to cure the problem

Q:
I have a question which I am shy to ask but another sister who has come to Islam recently wants an answer to and I do not have an answer (with dilals from the Qur'an and Sunnah). I hope you can help and I hope Allah will for give me if it is inappropriate but as Muslims we should never be shy in seeking knowledge. Her question was "Is it permissible in Islam to masturbate?".
May Allah increase us all in knowledge.

A:
Praise be to Allaah.

Masturbation (for both men and women) is haraam (forbidden) in Islam based on the following evidence:

First from the Qur’aan:

Imam Shafi’i stated that masturbation is forbidden based on the following verses from the Qur’aan (interpretation of the meaning):

"And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7 Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for the wives or that their right hand possess. And whoever seeks beyond that is the transgressor.

"And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them of His bounty." 24.33. This verse also clearly orders whoever does not have the financial means to marry to keep himself chaste and be patient in facing temptations (including masturbation) until Allah enriches them of His bounty.

Secondly, from the sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him):

Abdullaah ibn Mas’ood said, "We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatsoever. So Allaah’s Messenger said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power." Bukhari:5066. The hadeeth orders men who are not able to marry to fast despite the hardship encountered in doing so, and not to masturbate despite the ease with which it can be done.

There are additional evidences that can be cited to support this ruling on masturbation, but due to the limited space we will not go through them here. Allaah knows what is best and most correct.

As for curing the habit of masturbation, we recommend the following suggestions:

1) The motive to seek a cure for this problem should be solely following Allaah’s orders and fearing His punishment.

2) A permanent and quick cure from this problem lies in marriage as soon as the person is able, as shown in the Prophet’s hadeeth.

3) Keeping oneself busy with what is good for this world and the hereafter is essential in breaking this habit before it becomes second nature after which it is very difficult to rid oneself of it.

4) Lowering the gaze (from looking at forbidden things such as pictures, movies etc.) will help suppress the desire before it leads one to commit the haraam (forbidden). Allaah orders men and women to lower their gaze as shown in the following two verses and in the Prophet’s hadeeth (interpretations of the meanings):

"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is all-aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.) ..... " 24.30-31

Allaah’s messenger said: "Do not follow a casual (unintentional) look (at forbidden things) with another look." Al-Tirmidhi 2777. This is a general instruction by the Prophet to abstain from all that may sexually excite a person because it might lead him/her to commit the haraam (forbidden).

5) Using one’s available leisure time in worshipping Allaah and increasing religious knowledge.

6) Being cautious not to develop any of the medical symptoms that may result from masturbation such as weak eyesight, weak nervous system, and/or back pain. More importantly, feeling of guilt and anxiety that can be complicated by missing obligatory prayers because of the need to shower (ghusl) after every incidence of masturbation.

7) Avoiding the illusion that some youth have that masturbation is permissible because it prevents them from committing illegal sexual acts such as fornication or even homosexuality.

8) Strengthening one’s willpower and avoiding spending time alone as recommended by the Prophet when he said "Do not spend the night alone" Ahmad 6919.

9) Following the Prophet’s aforementioned hadeeth and fast when possible, because fasting will temper one’s sexual desire and keep it under control. However, one should not overreact and swear by Allaah not to return to the act because if one does not honor one’s promise, one would be facing the consequences of not living up to one’s oath to Allaah. Also, note that medication to diminish one’s sexual desire is strictly prohibited because it might permanently affect one’s sexual ability.

10) Trying to follow the Prophet’s recommendation concerning the etiquette of getting ready for bed, such as reading well-known supplications, sleeping on the right side, and avoiding sleeping on the belly (the Prophet forbade sleeping on the belly).

11) Striving hard to be patient and chaste, because persistence will eventually, Allaah willing, lead to attaining those qualities as second nature, as the Prophet explains in the following hadeeth:
"Whoever seeks chastity Allaah will make him chaste, and whoever seeks help from none but Allaah, He will help him, and whoever is patient He will make it easy for him, and no one has ever been given anything better than patience." Bukhari:1469.

12) Repenting, asking forgiveness from Allaah, doing good deeds, and not losing hope and feeling despair are all prerequisites to curing this problem. Note that losing hope is one of the major sins punishable by Allaah.

13) Finally, Allaah is the Most Merciful and He always responds to whoever calls on Him. So, asking for Allah’s forgiveness will be accepted, by His will.

Wallahu a’lam. And Allah knows what is best and most correct.

Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/329/masturbation