All my doors have closed

[Tabassum07]

Assalamualaikum,

Please everyone, I need all of your duas. Lately, everything in my life has come to a standstill. I live in a place where I have absolutely no job opportunities, so I can't work. There was one university where I applied for a teaching job, and I was sure to get in... the chairman kept telling me what subjects to teach, and I had two demonstration presentations in front of panels which were well received, but then the chairman said that as a last formality, I should wait until their "selection committee" to get recruited. But then afterwards, I heard nothing from that place, and I heard later on that a girl who didn't even come to that selection committee got selected. Well, no matter, that was some months ago, and I moved on. Then I was about to get married, but that turned up into nothing either. But now I suddenly don't know what to do. My parents don't want to send me to any other city in India, because they feel it's very unsafe to live alone, and I agree, but they're saying that I should now move to the US by myself, and start working etc. I have cousins and other people I know in Houston, and that's supposedly where I'm going, but still I won't have any mahram there, and soon I'll look for my own place to stay.

I'm so scared, and I don't know what to do. Should I move?? I've been doing Istikhara for about a week, and I got absolutely *no response*. Not even a slightest sign of yes or no. I'm just going out of my mind here. My brother who's visiting these days keeps calling me useless and that I've gone the fanatic way by becoming more religious. *sighs* I don't even know what use posting this here is going to do. I've been backed into a corner, and don't know what to do! WHY ME?!

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2: sister

Dear sister, have more faith and trust in Allah swt, why should you leave your home and work? It is the duty of your father to support you. I think that it is a good idea if you try to use your time in a study or learning something good and pray to Allah swt to keep you on his straight path, be good to your parents as Allah swt wants you to...........concentrate in your prayers , do good , help others .............be happy, Allah with you ........Remember this life is a test.

 

[dilek]

you can search for online teaching jobs... In that way you can even earn money. Which departmant you can work dear sister?

 

[IHearIslam]

InshaAllah, you're in my duas,

about moving, I agree with a_stranger, you dont have to move out of the country to work, it's YOUR dads responsibility to provide for you! and please dont ever say *why me?* remember Allah and how it's His decision and not yours...........and always say, qadar Allah wamanshaa faAl! it's the decree of Allah and He does what He wills!! period, and move on put your complete trust in HIM, wallahi you'll never ever lose!
and about what your brother says, dont pay attention to it....IGNORE and say peace out, because becoming more religious is the BEST!!!
Allah be with you hun, and again, you're in my duas!!

 

[salahdin]

بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ



Muslim recorded that the Prophet said:


«لا يَزَالُ يُسْتَجابُ لِلْعَبْدِ مَا لَمْ يَدْعُ بِإِثْم أَوْ قَطِيعَةِ رَحِمٍ مَا لَمْ يَسْتَعْجِل»


قِيَل: يَا رَسُولَ اللهِ، وَمَا الاسْتِعْجَالُ؟ قَالَ:


«يَقُولُ: قَدْ دَعَوْتُ وقَدْ دَعَوْتُ، فَلَمْ أَرَ يُسْتَجَابُ لِي، فَيَسْتَحْسِرُ عِنْدَ ذلِكَ وَيَدَعُ الدُّعَاء»


(The supplication of the servant will be accepted as long as he does not supplicate for what includes sin, or cutting the relations of the womb, and as long as he does not become hasty.) He was asked, "O Messenger of Allah! How does one become hasty'' He said, (He says, `I supplicated and supplicated, but I do not see that my supplication is being accepted from me.' He thus looses interest and abandons supplicating (to Allah)

 

[BrotherInIslam7]

Assalamualaikum,

Please everyone, I need all of your duas. Lately, everything in my life has come to a standstill. I live in a place where I have absolutely no job opportunities, so I can't work. There was one university where I applied for a teaching job, and I was sure to get in... the chairman kept telling me what subjects to teach, and I had two demonstration presentations in front of panels which were well received, but then the chairman said that as a last formality, I should wait until their "selection committee" to get recruited. But then afterwards, I heard nothing from that place, and I heard later on that a girl who didn't even come to that selection committee got selected. Well, no matter, that was some months ago, and I moved on. Then I was about to get married, but that turned up into nothing either. But now I suddenly don't know what to do. My parents don't want to send me to any other city in India, because they feel it's very unsafe to live alone, and I agree, but they're saying that I should now move to the US by myself, and start working etc. I have cousins and other people I know in Houston, and that's supposedly where I'm going, but still I won't have any mahram there, and soon I'll look for my own place to stay.

I am from India too, I can understand what you are going through. It's a tough situation. Just have patience, sister. Insha'Allah it will work out.

I'm so scared, and I don't know what to do. Should I move?? I've been doing Istikhara for about a week, and I got absolutely *no response*. Not even a slightest sign of yes or no. I'm just going out of my mind here. My brother who's visiting these days keeps calling me useless and that I've gone the fanatic way by becoming more religious. *sighs* I don't even know what use posting this here is going to do. I've been backed into a corner, and don't know what to do! WHY ME?!

Sister, If you are making Istikhara then Insha'Allah you will get what is best for you, it could/might be very subtle you might not even notice it maybe .

Lol, I have been called 'fanatic' too by some people. Brush it aside, sister ! And reply them with calmness and with a smile. Insha'Allah one day they change the way they look at Islam

 

[A Kashmiri]

Sister, I think you should check in close by cities, where you may have relatives etc. which can help you in settling at that place. However as i know yes it is quite tough for a sister to go and live alone in any indian city.

Going to US and living alone there is not a good option either. Why dont your parents look for a groom for you if you are of a marriagable age.

Why dont you see some other opportunities in your city like opening a school for kids etc etc... I know it needs capital to do such things but there are ways to arrange it as well. There are many things you can think , if you dig a bit deeper.

May Allah will help you inshallah.

 

[Tabassum07]

No no, my parents are willing to send me there so that I can start a life for myself, since I've been completely idle for the past 4-5 years, and there is absolutely no opportunity here. I don't have relatives in any other Indian city, but I have relatives in the US, and I've lived myself in US for half my life. That's why. And the plan is that six months later, my younger brother can join me also, so he can continue his studies (he can't go right now because he still has to complete his semester). Plus, I have filed for my parents greencard, but I need to be domiciled in US before the filing process can be completed. The last date for that is in January.

I am *definitely not* breaking ties with my family, astaghfirullah.

 

[IbnAdam77]

wa'alaikumussalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

Everything goes according to the decree of Allah and we are pleased with it, even if it cuts us into pieces. Have your utmost trust in none but Allah sister. Surely then everything will go accordingly inshaAllah.

When things like jobs or marriage preparations do not work, be sure that there will be great wisdom behind them. I have experienced both of them by my own, and yeah I found later that both of them were not good for me. Alhamdhulillah!

If I agreed to everything the panel said and gave answers as they wished me to, I would be able to get more than 800 US Dollars. Later, I got a job which paid me less than 300 US Dollars. But Alhamdhulillah that is the decree of Allah, and it was my first job. I spent 7 months there, against my family. Not because they wanted money from me, but for my betterment and my future as a young Muslim. Finally, I changed the job with the mercy of Allah to the place where I am working now. Alhamdhulillah! I am happy with it.

It is Allah, the Lord of the Worlds who maintains everything. There is no power except a power given by Him, and there is not mercy except the mercy of Him. Our Rizq is not on the hands of the heads of companies and organisations, but it is on the hands of Allah, who says in Quran, "And when the Prayer is finished, then may ye disperse through the land, and seek of the Bounty of Allah. and celebrate the Praises of Allah often (and without stint): that ye may prosper". ( Surah al-Jum'ah, Verse 10).

Rasoolullah (sallallahu 'alaihi wasallam) said, "Were you to put your complete trust in Allaah, He would provide for you as He provides for the birds. They issue forth hungry in the morning and return filled in the evening." [At-Tirmithi]

So we need them not, and who we need is Allah, only Allah.

Sister keep your striving strong and firm. InshaAllah soon you will see the mercy of Allah lifting you up from all the sides and then you will say, "Alhamdhulillah! Alhamdhulillah! Alhamdhulillah!"

InshaAllah I will keep you in my du'as.

Last but not least, shall we read this verse of Quran? "And rely upon Allaah; and sufficient is Allaah as Disposer of affairs." [Quran 33:3]

wassalam 'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

 

[xSharingan01x]

Assalamualaikum,

Please everyone, I need all of your duas. Lately, everything in my life has come to a standstill. I live in a place where I have absolutely no job opportunities, so I can't work. There was one university where I applied for a teaching job, and I was sure to get in... the chairman kept telling me what subjects to teach, and I had two demonstration presentations in front of panels which were well received, but then the chairman said that as a last formality, I should wait until their "selection committee" to get recruited. But then afterwards, I heard nothing from that place, and I heard later on that a girl who didn't even come to that selection committee got selected. Well, no matter, that was some months ago, and I moved on. Then I was about to get married, but that turned up into nothing either. But now I suddenly don't know what to do. My parents don't want to send me to any other city in India, because they feel it's very unsafe to live alone, and I agree, but they're saying that I should now move to the US by myself, and start working etc. I have cousins and other people I know in Houston, and that's supposedly where I'm going, but still I won't have any mahram there, and soon I'll look for my own place to stay.

I'm so scared, and I don't know what to do. Should I move?? I've been doing Istikhara for about a week, and I got absolutely *no response*. Not even a slightest sign of yes or no. I'm just going out of my mind here. My brother who's visiting these days keeps calling me useless and that I've gone the fanatic way by becoming more religious. *sighs* I don't even know what use posting this here is going to do. I've been backed into a corner, and don't know what to do! WHY ME?!

:salam2:
Sister Tabassum, I pray that your condition improves and that Allah opens doors for you from places you did not expect. Have 'Sabr' and continue to supplicate and hope without second guessing. I know it's very hard to do especially since we tend to stress and loose focus in the midst of our struggles and grievances . Speaking from experience, Allah will surely grant you what is good for you the moment you do not expect it, and the reward will be that much sweeter because of your perseverance.

If you feel comfortable and you think you'll enjoy settling down in India, then I would suggest you stay active and look for jobs without being discouraged. It's understandable how difficult it is to start a career or have opportunities in a poor country like India. Little opportunities that do exist are sadly taken up by those with strong networks and 'special connections' even if they are not qualified. I dare say this applies to that girl who got the job instead of you.

I don't think it's a bad idea to migrate to the United States, if your relatives are dependable until you can stand on your own. Since you already have experience living in the States, I don't think it will be difficult for you to adjust here, and compare to India even during bad economic downturn, there ample opportunities for qualified people. At the very least you can find a job in retail or something for the first few months, establish yourself, and get acquainted with practicing sister who'll have a positive influence and be a source of support for you.
Later on, you can pursue other interest if you want to further your education or seek technical skills for specific jobs. Opportunity is not an issue in this country so long as you have a strong will.

Anywayz, I would personally give 'migration' a thought, a change of environment can be helpful. Allahualam.
Plus, I'm assuming your at a point in your life where you want to establish yourself and your career.
Staying idle and being stuck in the same condition can be stressing in itself, so even if you're not married, keeping yourself busy with work and what not might be a positive change

Have patience and stay strong.

 

[Tabassum07]

I don't think it's a bad idea to migrate to the United States, if your relatives are dependable until you can stand on your own. Since you already have experience living in the States, I don't think it will be difficult for you to adjust here, and compare to India even during bad economic downturn, there ample opportunities for qualified people. At the very least you can find a job in retail or something for the first few months, establish yourself, and get acquainted with practicing sister who'll have a positive influence and be a source of support for you.
Later on, you can pursue other interest if you want to further your education or seek technical skills for specific jobs. Opportunity is not an issue in this country so long as you have a strong will.

Anywayz, I would personally give 'migration' a thought, a change of environment can be helpful. Allahualam.
Plus, I'm assuming your at a point in your life where you want to establish yourself and your career.
Staying idle and being stuck in the same condition can be stressing in itself, so even if you're not married, keeping yourself busy with work and what not might be a positive change

Have patience and stay strong.

I do want a change of environment. I'm surrounded by non-practicing muslims, and for me, doing everyday things like wearing hijab and praying salaat is getting more and more difficult. My own family wants me to let go of these things, and they keep telling me stories of how "fanatics" end up not getting jobs, ending up alone and distressed. It's becoming more and more of a daily struggle to keep my imaan up. I've started dreading going out, because as soon as I grab my hijab, my family starts making faces and saying You're wearing That?? And then the lecture starts all over again for ages. So I want to go somewhere where I can meet at least *1* practicing muslim. Even now five minutes ago, my own mother keeps siding with my brother and saying how useless I am, and how "cut out from the real world" I am by being religious, that I will never be able to have a "real" life if I keep following Islam.

*sigh*

 

[q8penpals]

Salam

What do you/can you teach? My school in Kuwait is still in need of a Science teacher in Middle school (general science).

Kuwait is at least a Muslim country and there is a large Indian population here.

 

[allah is with me]

SISTER PLZ DONT THINK LIKE THAT...
ALLAH IS REALLY TESTING YOU SISTER! PLZ HAVE PATIENCE....
ALLAH IS SURELY WITH THE PATIENCE....

 

[a_stranger]

:salam2:sister

I am sure that Allah swt have a good plan for you, I am speaking out of experiance , When i was young I started wearing higab at a very young age , while all girls around me weren`t ......even the elder relatives weren`t , but alhamduliAllah things changed and Allah swt gave us his lessons ........Now after a long time most of my relatives are wearing Higab .......something done by Allah swt .....I pray that Allah swt keep the sweatness of faith firm in (my heart and) your heart and guide your family to his way be and patient :ma: believe me things changes just keep your trust in the one created you.

 

[ahmed_indian]

I've been doing Istikhara for about a week, and I got absolutely *no response*. Not even a slightest sign of yes or no. I'm just going out of my mind here.

its wrong to think that all of us will get signals in dreams like seeing red or colours or some extraordinary stuff.

do istikhara, leave it to Allah but keep working.

my bro did istikhara and went for job interview. he did not get that job so means Allah did not wish it.

we have to be alert to look for signs. eg. a sheikh told that person did istikhara and went to buy ticket. he found the shop closed when it is usually opened @ that time. so he took that Allah do not wish him to travel.

u have to feel ur heart. is ur heart changing the direction? is it moving towards a particular direction? listen to it.